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What made you LOL today?


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I left a silent but deadly in an empty aisle at the grocery store today. Moving along with my shopping to the next aisle, I hear a couple who just turned into the aisle exclaiming "Oh my god!", then s

This happened to me again today. I bought cider and was asked to show my ID card when I was paying for it. My friend, who was shopping with me, saw it and had a laugh about that. Later I asked her, "W

inb4 "oh sorry haha, it will be nice when you're older" last summer on holiday in France we were at a restaurant. I ordered an alcoholic drink and the waiter looked at me surprised and said "ther

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  • 2 weeks later...

A lady helps her man install a new computer.

 

Once it is completed,

 

She tells him to select a password,

 

a word that he'll always remember.

 

as the computer asks him to enter it,

 

he looks at his wife and with a macho

 

gesture and a wink in his eye, he selects

 

a word but he is annoyed with her reaction,

 

when he selects: penis.

 

As he hits "enter", to validate the selection,

 

his wife collapses with laughter and

 

rolls on the floor in hysteria .

 

 

 

The computer had replied:

 

TOO SHORT- ACCESS DENIED!

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the planning of tomorrow:

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yes it's in Dutch but let me try to translate:

 

WORLD DESTRUCTION 21/12/2012

 

temporal planning

 

05.00 Waking up people of world with air raid

06.00 Arrival Mayans

07.00 Arrival aliens

08.00 Arrival chief of G8-countries

09.00 Arrival of all the saints,martyrs etc.

10.00 Anthem of the end of the world: Highway To Hell

10.30 Welcome word by the pope

11.45 Lunchbreak

13.00 VN-meeting concerning the end of the world

15.00 Minute of silence

15.05 Beginning public ceremonies

17.00 Beginning buffet

18.00 Departure of the Mayans

19.00 Fireworks and game of soccer: Brazil - World team

21.00 Ascension of the angels

22.00 End of ceremonials (Bar open) FREE BEER

23.30 Giveaway of 3D-glasses

24.00 WORLD DESTRUCTION (inc. The Final Countdown)

Afterwards World Destruction-After-Party

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