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    Coldplay Scribbles: Scribble 5

    Coldplay Scribbles

    Scribble 5

    8 October 2002


    Just when I thought that I didn’t get enough Coldplay in my system...something new pops up and totally makes me scream like a bleep...man oh man! This week is so good! Ah!


    The miscellaneous parts comes now...please enjoy the insanity.


    (KINDA SAD) RANT: There’s a program that’s taped in the Bay Area in California called Live At The Fillmore, in which a local TV station showcases and does a video expose on up-and-coming bands that play at The Fillmore music venue in San Francisco. It’s a half-hour show with interviews and concert footage, and bands such as Linkin Park have been on (you can tell how long the program has been in effect). Coldplay was on it last year, and I didn’t get to see that episode, but a few months later the TV station did a special Live At The Fillmore show that was an hour long and featured Coldplay, Pete Yorn and the Indigo Girls. I taped that. And I watched that tape last night. And somehow, somewhere, something, it got fucked up and now plays with double vision.Don’t get me wrong...double sights of Coldplay all the way around was fabulous. But I wanted clarity, crispness...I wanted to SEE. I was so sad when they did interviews with Guy and Will offstage. Or when Chris mistook a guy for a girl on the street. It’s these types of things I want to see with precision! Damn Kodak VCR tapes! NO FAIR! So sad, so sad is I. Ah.


    “HMMM” NEWS: Here is what we will start out with:


    "I don't know if people will get this, but the way I treated my vocals in the verse of 'Take It From Here' [my new single] was like [Radiohead's] Thom Yorke or [Coldplay's] Chris Martin. To me, Radiohead and Coldplay are the modern-day Beatles. I would love to do a duet with Chris Martin someday. That would just be something so original, and I know I could pull it off. It may not happen, but it doesn't hurt to put it out there.” -- Justin Timberlake, NSYNC


    The reason this is ‘hmm’ news is that I had (and still have) no idea what to think about this after reading it.


    Let’s think about this. Chris: sings like an angel. Justin: sings like a sheep on crack. The vocal arrangement would be horrid. They’d hit different notes at different times and singing together on a chorus would just not be appealing. And what would they do during breaks from recording? Would Justin try to teach Chris how to choreograph piano dances? Would Chris teach Justin how to sing? I mean, wait...that part is good...ANYWAY, me personally just thinks this is a bad idea, only because I honestly think their voices wouldn’t blend in smoothly. Now, after reading what Chris said about her in Rolling Stone, I totally think he and Erykah Badu would make an awesome duo to record some tracks. They’re both soulful. But hey, opinions are opinions...I’m the one who thinks they should still release an EP with “Animals” and “Murder” on it.


    There was also something that Chris apparently said about NSYNC at Jones Beach during a gig. And there’s talk of him bashing boy bands somewhere. Don’t worry Scribble readers, Ms. Jenz is on it to find what this is all about!


    SPOTTINGS - MAGS AND REVIEWS: There’s a online article for NME.com that mentions a little something about Ash, Chris and Jon...and this deserved its own section:


    WORLD PREMIERE NEWS: (Imagine this in 50 point font and flashing Vegas lights.) Chris freaking Martin and Jon freaking Buckland are going to be in A FUCKING MOVIE. Cue in the girly squeals. How fun is this gonna be?! In actuality, this isn’t really world premiere news since it did show up on NME.com first...but hey, this is news to you all, right?! :)


    Anyway, Ash, who was on tour with Coldplay as support in the States this fall, have shot and are shooting footage for their first-ever horror film entitled “Slashed.” I have no idea what the basis of the movie is, other than that people get killed, and Chris and Jon are the detectives who investigate the strange murders. Chris is Agent Bones and Jon is Agent Ford...yes, you can keel over in laughter now. I am at the moment. As my roommate said, “How could a horror film be that scary when Chris is named Agent Bones?!”


    At least he wasn’t named Agent Boner. Yikes. (Chris...with a boner...ohhhhhh dear, this is getting way out of hand.)


    You can get more information, pictures of the “agents,” and even see a short clip of Chris and Jon (!!!!!!!!!!!) at the screenplay writer Jed Shepherd’s site, www.ash-unofficial.com. Seriously kids....this shit with Chris and Jon is so horribly funny I laughed uncontrollably for a good few minutes. Chris’s line in the clip is “We have no views on this case other than the fact that these were no ordinary murders.” People...heart attack alert...Chris is smoking a pipe in this scene. I’m scared. PLEASE tell me that was a prop. I think so! I don’t understand why he’d want to wreck his lungs and singing pipes like that, but we’ll see. It’s just odd in a way to see Chris and Jon ‘out’ of music stature and doing something like a movie, but it’s also superwicked. I can’t wait for this to come out. Ash is going to be releasing the movie “Slashed” on a DVD they plan to do in the beginning of the year.


    There’s also mad other musicians in the film, such as Moby, The Hives, Dave Grohl from the Foo Fighters, and The Vines. Yes, The Vines. Just when I thought Craig could not be as demented as I think he is...he proves me wrong, yet again. How fun! And just as a pitch, if you haven’t heard anything from Ash outside of their set opening for Coldplay, you’re so missing out. They’re rad baby. (AndTimWheelerishot, yesheis. Side note.)


    COMING SOON: The moment you have all been waiting for...the international debut of...LOVELINE! Mark your stinking calendars: 15 October, Tuesday, is the big day. I call it the “Triple Threat” day: the Loveline transcript, a Berkeley show gig review, and A Rush album review will all be debuting on that day. HOW FUN! I hope everyone who doesn’t have lives will tune in and get some laughs from all the goodies. And as a refresher, Loveline is a US sex advice show that Chris and Jon were on the week before A Rush was released. I sadly still think no one told the guys this was a sex advice show based on their reactions to some of the questions asked...”Should me and my cousin go down on the same guy?” (Burst-out-laughing-cue....HERE!) I believe it’ll be quite entertaining. Coming soon!


    RUMORS: This Coldplay pay-per-view concert...does anyone know about this? It was in a random YahooGroup a few weeks ago, so I’m just curious as to where this started and if it’s any good being true. Email me if you know. Also, I think I may have upset some people in my last column when I wrote the following line:


    “More news, yes kids, more news. First, and most importantly, single news! Chris is single! (Ohhhh, how I wish...haha, I just made 429 girls scream and cry...bring on the hate mail!)”


    Clarification...Chris is dating me, okay? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have kept this from you guys, but I had to! :) All sarcasm and dreaming aside, for the record, as far as Ms. Jenz knows, Chris is married. Married to his music. HELLO! Chris doesn’t have a girlfriend. He’s way too busy and involved in his work to give that kind of time to someone. Then again, I could be flamingly wrong. Maybe Chris does have a ladyfriend who he’s kept from the spotlight all this time. That’s something he would do. But who knows really...unless Chris chooses to reveal her (him? eeek, how sad I would be!) to the world, we can all find joy in him being single and fantasizing about how much he’d sweep us off our feet. We are sick puppies.


    LAUGH: Interviewer: “What are your views on this horrific crime?” Chris: “We have no views on this case other than the fact that these were no ordinary murders.” If you watch this, email me...I have a little something about that clip...is he having a bit of a hard time remembering his lines?! His eyes are darting all around the place. But he looks SO adorable, it rocks. Still, I can’t help but think whenever I watch it...”A little trouble with the lines there, Chris, eh?!”


    In addition to a new movie, there seems to be plans to make a soundtrack to “Slashed,” with an Ash remake of “Candy” off Free All Angels...metal style. Hell freaking yeah. Can we do this to like, “Green Eyes?” It would be so great! Or maybe even “Amsterdam.” Wow. Let’s take a poll: if “Slashed” had a soundtrack and we had the option of re-making a Coldplay song, which one should be remade metal-style? Email moi and we’ll see what happens!


    RANDOM (FORMERLY ‘SPECIAL’) NOTE: I have a Coldplay picture in my wallet. Go me.


    NEW FEATURE!:This is a new feature that I want feedback on as to whether or not it’s cool. I’ll stop at 3 if I need to. But, I thought I’d start this to see how it goes. In a previous column (24 September), I mentioned that I am absolutely terrified or meeting Chris for a variety of reasons So, I decided to make my fear apart of the weekly Scribbles columns and slowly work out and maybe get over my fear, while also trying to give some insight into my logic. And, just as there’s reasons to never face Chris, I have a counterpart *like peanut butter and jelly baby* of reasons to meet Chris, and about meeting the other boys in CP. I’m guessing this is something I’ll end up keeping cos no one sent me “Die bitch die, stop this feature” emails, so here we go.


    20 REASONS NOT TO MEET CHRIS MARTIN - Reason 11: I will scream a bloodcurdling and deathly scream that will knock the wind out of Chris, leaving him unconscious on the floor and me uberly suspicious of his near death. I would feel so anxious to be meeting someone of such great stature I’d literally freak out and shriek. Like a teenybopper who just got her period.


    20 REASONS TO MEET CHRIS MARTIN - Reason 11 (in correspondence to above): Chris...on the floor...unconscious...hello! (Ha, fat chance, and ew, dirty.) Someone’s gotta recusistate the man! Damn, I guess it’s me! How lovely to be credited bringing back the life of the man of rock-and-roll. And how fun.


    No one called the asylum, did they? I’m still here!


    THIS WEEK’S “I WANT TO MEET COLDPLAY BECAUSE”: I want to pinch Guy’s cheeks...the ones on his face, that is (reason 29).


    LYRIC SECTION: I’m now currently taking submissions for the Lyric section! This week’s will be from “Warning Sign.”


    “You came back to haunt me and I realized

    That you were an island and I passed you by

    You were an island to discover.” (thank you to coldplaying.com for lyrics! hehe)


    This line is SO CHEESY, it’s funny. “You were an island and I passed you by”? How about, “You were a cheeseburger and I passed you up...you were a cheeseburger to be digested”? Would that still have been romantic? Maybe maybe, who knows. It just doesn’t seem creative or thoughtful enough to be in “Warning Sign,” which is one of those classic tracks that could be played during a movie where the boy and girl realize they’re made for each other and run before the other leaves. Ah. Disclaimer: not all Coldplay lyrics are cheesy. I just think this one about the island reference is a little weaksauce is all.


    DELICATE THOUGHTS: Readers, be proud...I listened to “Politik” in entirity yesterday without shedding a tear! Granted the eyes filled up, but not one water filled tear spilled over! Isn’t everyone proud of me? I is a big girlie now! I seriously am glad to be back to “normal” per se...I kinda missed “Politik” considering it’s my fave song off A Rush.


    I have noticed, however, that every single time I decide to play a Coldplay tune - every time, mind you - it doesn’t matter if I’m cleaning, doing homework, talking with someone, or if I just have it on for fun - my stomach churns, and goosebumps invade my skin. EVERY TIME. How fucking crazy is this?! From all my faves even to the b-sides, it’s a tingle that shoots around my body and stays for the length of how long I have Coldplay on. I think it’s incredible that I still have that. It’s like when kids fall in love and they are in the “puppy love” stage...it’s the first time, all the time, despite the fact they may have been going out for years. I’ve been going out with Coldplay close to two and a half years now, and we’re still in the “puppy love” stage. Every time I hear a Coldplay song, it’s almost as if I’m hearing it for the first time. It’s quite a beautiful feeling actually. Very awesome indeed.


    In the beginning cords of “The Scientist,” I feel like I‘m in the room with Chris while he was composing this song. I can see his fingers pounding on the keys, doing the weird piano head bob we all love, blue eyes concentrated flusterly on what it sounds like. This is quite odd for me. I guess I just ‘feel’ this song, but maybe more? Who knows.


    My uberpersonal story on how I got tuned into Coldplay and how “Animals” made me bawl spontaneously for three days will come next week. I’m still proud I can listen to “Politik” now. Yay me!


    LAST WORDS: I really want to thank everyone who’s emailed me with your comments, concerns, love and hate about Scribbles and the site. Ian and I totally appreciate your words and really do read everything that gets sent. The Coldplayers rawk! And everyone wish Ian “fun time” when he gets to see CP this Friday! Lucky bastard! :)


    Scribbles is ova man. You find it here foolio...every Tuesday, posted on coldplaying.com. If you have any reviews or pictures from any upcoming CP gigs, email them to [email protected] and we’/he’d love to put them up on the site...guaranteed! What else is so surefire besides peanut butter? Nothing! Enjoy kids, and I’ll see ya soon.



    The Coldplay Starlet



    The reviews, opinions and views expressed in this column is the sole reflection of Jenz and not with anyone or anything associated to Coldplay and its trademarks and not even Ian, although he’d back Jenz up to kick anyone’s ass. Have an idea to throw at me for a column? Or just wanna throw something else at me? Send your marriage proposals, hate mail, and comments to [email protected]. AIM is always fun too: try TelMeYourPolitik, during sporadic hours. No one wants to talk to me! So maybe I’ll just be on at 3 in the morning from now on. Yeah. Way fun.

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