Strong lineup set for Juno's

Juno Awards April 1st: No fooling, this year's Juno broadcast may be worth watching! The all-Canuck line-up features yummy mummy Nelly Furtado pulling double duty as both host and performer, as well tunes from K-os, The Tragically Hip, DJ Champion ("No Heaven") and Montreal's up-and-coming singer/songwriter Patrick Watson. Tied for Juno domination with five nominations each are Nelly, K-os and Billy (no) Talent, but one of them has the inside edge for a clean sweep... Timbaland could not be reached for comment.

Neil Young Audiobiography: Neil's much anticipated archival box release has finally been announced by a trailer @ repriserecords.com/neilarchives/. Some time this year "Volume 1: 1963-1972" will be released featuring 8 CDs and 2 DVDs of rare, unreleased studio and live recordings, never-before-seen film, photos, letters and a 150-page book. Bernard Shakey could not be reached for comment.

Coldplay Vs Eno: During the award season last year Coldplay promised they would disappear for awhile. Now they are threatening to flood radio with their emotional pap once again in the company of producer Brian Eno! Rumor has it that Eno has promised them that he won't fix them to sound like the Talking Heads. David Bryne could not be reached for comment.

Eno Vs Spore: To ease his mind over making millions from producer's points on mega best-selling albums Brian Eno has returned to some experimental work on behalf of Will Wright's Spore video game. The game's designers wanted music that is as layered as the game itself, and one of Eno's "generative music" programs called "The Shuffler" fit the bill. Even a small combination of Eno's samples in the program will never, allegedly, combine in the same way twice in a lifetime! Ms Pacman could not be reached for comment.

More On Chris Martin: In the future were we still supposed to be buying seven inch singles? On March 26th Coldplay will be releasing an expensive reminder of their bathos in the form of a super limited, import box set that collects all of their singles and several rarities. Among the fifteen 7"ers will be their debut single "The Blue Room" which has never been on vinyl before, as well as the download-only track "The Hardest Part." "The Singles 1999-2006" sells for fifty pounds in the UK - so you do the math. Gwyneth Paltrow could not be reached for comment.

Arctic Monkeys Return: Those hot young Brits are back with a new full length-cd, "Favourite Worst Nightmare" (due April 24th) and have announced a North American tour beginning at the Coachella festival on April 27th. Tickets are now on sale for Canadian dates in May in Vancouver, Toronto and Montreal. Opening the shows will be the Buzzcock-inspired youngsters from Nashville, Be Your Own Pet. Pete Shelley could not be reached for comment.

Jesus And Mary Chain Found: Now that the bones of their holy namesakes have been found the Jesus & Mary Chain's Jim and William Reid have decided to reform as Sister Vanilla, which is a good name for them because they are girl-y, white and bland. Do you remember when big baby Jim Reid assaulted a Toronto heckler with his mike stand during at a RPM show in 1987? He got off the charge by making a donation to the Salvation Army. Jesus and both Mary's could not be reached for comment.

Lex Takes Flight: If the weather isn't chilled enough for you, a new club night is! Tangent at Flight 55 (713 College St., sort of across from the Mod Club) is a new Thursday residency for the Legion Of Green Men's Lex and Noah Pred (aka DJ Shen). With no cover charge it is certainly the best way to hear all things downtempo, ambient/dub and dub-step outside of the party circuit, where the LOGM will be performing this summer. They recently had a recording session with one of their ambient heroes, Eno's favorite zither player, Laraaji, who was in Toronto giving a deep listening class at Jivamukti Yoga.

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