The Mad Hatter

I really hate American girls.

I read horoscopes all the time. They're fun.

You remind me a little of Regina Spektor there. Don't be creeped out by the fact that I have a weird lesbian crush on Regina Spektor.

TOASTER FTW

A bunch of kids were going to put that on their AP exam papers. My dad is grading the U.S. history exams and has only seen a few so far.

New York City is scary to drive in. :uhoh:

Good thing this isn't random babbling.

I didn't actually throw it. I sort of tossed it a foot away. It landed on its feet and then a few minutes later decided it wanted to scratch the hell out of my leg for no particular reason. I must assume that it likes being thrown.

Okay. The cat randomly attacks me all the time. She thinks that the best route to any place she wants to go is across my exposed skin. SHE STARTS IT. I only gave it back. My cat is a hateful bitch.

I thought we were done with this?

You're mean.

Or just creepy.

ohyes.

Or else I would be somewhat turned on right now.

I write a lot. I suck at it.

This hurts like a bitch.

AAGGGGHHH I'M STILL BLEEDING YOU GUYS I THREW IT ACROSS THE ROOM AND IT KEEPS COMING BACK AND CLIMBING UP THE CHAIR AND JUMPING ON MYARM WHEN I THREW IT, IT LATCHED ONTO MY HAND EVEN MORE. IT REALLY FUCKING BURNS.

I'm going to vent here, rather than contaminate any other threads. MY CAT JUST SCRATCHED THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF ME FUCK FUCK OW DAMMIT I'M GOING TO SLIT THAT DAMN KITTEN'S THROAT WITH ITS OWN FUCKING CLAWS

THE CLAW

That's what Vampire Freaks is good for. I have...strange...not-quite-friends.

I would like to see the Sydney Opera House explode. I...I don't know why.

Yes.

It costs less to destroy than other cities. Really.

Agree? If so, why? Why not?

You missed nothing.