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Funneh


Sammie

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It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing.

Most of the street lights in the area were broken, and the silence was only broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a dustbin.

Then he suddenly heard a strange noise

 

..BUMP

 

..BUMP

 

..BUMP

 

Startled by this, he turned, and to his amazement, through the driving rain, he saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road.

 

...BUMP

 

...BUMP

 

...BUMP

 

He froze on the spot, he couldn't believe his eyes, as the box approached from the shadows he was able to make out its shape more clearly...it was a coffin.

 

 

Not wanting anything to do with this, he put his head down and started walking briskly home.

 

...BUMP

 

...BUMP

 

...BUMP

 

 

He could feel the coffin gaining on him, he started walking faster....

 

 

...BUMP...BUMP

 

...BUMP...BUMP

 

...BUMP...BUMP

 

The coffin was closing with his every step, he started to jog...but he heard the coffin speed up after him....

 

...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP

 

...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP

 

...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP

 

He started to sprint..but so did the coffin....

 

 

...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP

 

...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP

 

...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP

 

Eventually he made it to his front door, but he knew the coffin was only seconds behind.

Fumbling around in his pocket, he pulled out his keys, his hands trembling, he managed to open the lock, he dived inside, slamming the front door behind him. He shot into his front room and slumped into his comfy chair.

 

SUDDENLY there was a loud crash as the coffin smashed its way through the front door. The force of the impact broke the lock off the coffin allowing the lid to swing freely on its rusty hinges as it continued its chase....

 

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

 

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

 

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

 

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

 

In horror the young lad fled again, as fast as his shaking legs could take him, he bolted upstairs to the bathroom and lock the door.....

 

 

BUMP...SCREECH...HOP..BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...

 

BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...

 

BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...

 

The coffin again gave chase up the stairs, across the landing, and launched itself at the bathroom door.

With an almighty smash, the bathroom door flew off its hinges....

 

The coffin stood in the doorway, then started to approach the young terrified lad...

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

 

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP.SCREECH...

 

In a last ditch attempt to save his skin, he reached for his bathroom cabinet.....

 

He grabbed a bar on Imperial Leather soap and threw it at the coffin...still it came...

 

BUMP..SCREECH

 

He grabbed his can of Lynx deodorant and threw it.....

....still it came....

 

BUMP...SCREEECH...

 

He grabbed his first aid kit....still it came.....

 

 

BUMP...SCREEECH....

 

 

He grabbed some Benelyn cough mixture....and threw it....

 

 

....

 

The coffin stopped.

 

 

 

 

:lol:

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