Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 WILL SURVIVE' - (Un-edited versions) MALE VERSION First I was afraid I was petrified At the ugly slapper that was lying by my side I would've drunk a little less, I would've tried to keep my head. If I'd known for just one second you'd Assault me in your bed. I tried to go, walk out the door But you've been sitting on my legs and I Can't feel them anymore And now you're sitting on my face, my nose has vanished - not a trace, I only hope that you're big knickers aren't Made of liquorice lace I want to go, I've got to leave Before your fat and naked body makes me want to heave Only hope that no one saw me walking home With such a sl*t. God the things that you get up to when you're half cut. Please let me go, I'm getting scared There's nothing I can do to stop those ugly Bre*sts from being bared. I think that I must have been mad, God what Made me want to court her? With t*ts that look like Tesco bags I've just Filled up with water It's time to go, run out the door She's started hinting she wants sex on her Dirty lino floor I don't think there's anything worse Than the al-co-hol-ics curse. I WILL SURVIVE ! To which the girls reply......... FEMALE VERSION At first I was afraid, I was petrified. By the ugly w a*ker that was lying by my side. I would've drunk a little less, I would've Tried to keep my head, If I'd know for just one second I'd be in Your crusty bed... I tried to go, walk out the door. But I laughed so hard at your small kn*b that I've fallen on the floor. Your butts a pimply mess, it's just a broken-out disgrace, But I'd rather look at that, than at your F###ing ugly face...! I want to go, I've got to leave. Your talk of chicks and football really makes Me want to heave. I only know I've got to stop my drinking Spirits and the beer Coz when I looked at you last night, you Looked just like Richard Gere ! Please let me go, I feel quite sick, We had the worst sex in the world and you're An ugly pr*ck I should have sh**ged your gorgeous mate, At least he's got a lovely flat But no I go and trust the booze and now I'm Stuck with you, you tw*t. It's time to go, run out the door. You look so ugly it should really be against the law. I'm going to give up all the booze, I'm going To have no stupid fun Coz waking up beside your mug, just makes me Want to be a nun ! I WILL SURVIVE!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mojo Pin Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 :stunned: I only like the cover cake made ( cake was a band btw...i think hmmmm) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 :lol: yep was cool :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 that was a fun read.... :lol: :lol: sad that these things really happen... :o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 you don't agree...? :stunned: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsBerry Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 I love this song, but not the cover by Cake :sick: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 nope, never had someone unexpected in my bed before :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 me neitehr but i know that this happens.... :stunned: a friend of mine ended up like that... :lol: :stunned: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 :lol: still, its better that it doesnt happen to us eh :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 hehe...i would never get that drunk that this would happen... :lol: :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 haha lol me neither :lol: although i have been in situations where it could have :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 what could have ...? to be that drunk or take someone ugly home...? or both ...? :stunned: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 well lol, a girl was drunk and if i were drunk, lol then maybe :lol: but im too easily kept sober and too moral Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 too easily kept sober...? does that mean you always have to drive...? :P good boy having some moral.... :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 :lol: nope, i cant drive thats my excuse lol anyway we get the bus :P but yeah, its good to have morals :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eddierofl Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 I drive a Mini, so you can drive as badly as you like and people just laugh. :D :lol: :lol: To the songs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 @Dave you can't drive...? :o shame on you nothing is better than driving aat nightimes through the city with some loud music one...8) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eddierofl Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 Oh, like doing blockies in the centre of town, that's what the bogans do here! :lol: Mind you, i've down a couple of them in my time :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 @Dave you can't drive...? :o shame on you nothing is better than driving aat nightimes through the city with some loud music one...8) im going to..im an idiot for not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yorkeisagod Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 :lol: :lol: bloody brilliant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 im going to..im an idiot for not! you need to learn to drive... :stunned: NOW stop watching the cricket and get yourself behind the wheel...:P :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DavidG Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 :lol: okeydokey okeydokey but the cricket is schwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyEsther Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 sure... :rolleyes: :rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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