Signing off now for a while, so enjoy! No offence intended.................

 

 

 

GOING FOR A McShit

Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're

just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your

declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is a Mcshit

with Lies.

 

AEROPLANE BLONDE

One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

 

AUSSIE KISS

Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

 

BEER COAT

The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise

at 3 in the morning.

 

BEER COMPASS

The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a booze

cruise, even though you're too pi$$ed to remember where you live, how

you got there, and where you've come from.

 

BOBFOC

Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.

 

BREAKING THE SEAL

Your first pi$$ in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After

breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be

required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.

 

BRITNEY SPEARS

Modern Slang for 'beers', e. g. "Couple of Britneys please, Doreen".

 

BRUCE LEE

Erect nipple (as in, a hard Nip).

 

DRINK-LINK

A modern term for a cashpoint machine (ATM). Named so because it is

common to visit one before going out on the booze.

 

SSSSSSSSSSHHHH1111111111111TTTTTTTTTTTTT

The sound made when driving through too narrow a gap at too high a

speed.

 

GREYHOUND

A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

 

JOHNNY-NO-STARS

A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who

works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges

displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show

their level of training.

 

MILLENNIUM DOMES

The contents of a Wonderbra, i. e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually f**k-all in there worth seeing.

 

MONKEY BATH

A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo! Oo! Oo!

Aa!Aa!Aa!".

 

MYSTERY BUS

The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the

toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people

so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

 

MYSTERY TAXI

The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake

up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in

your bed instead.

 

NELSON MANDELA

Rhyming Slang for 'Stella' (the lager).

 

PEARL HARBOUR

Cold (weather). An example of it would be - "It's a bit Pearl Harbour

out there (there's a nasty nip in the air)

 

PICASSO AR$E

A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's

got four buttocks.

 

SALAD DODGER

An excellent phrase for an overweight person.

 

SWAMP-DONKEY

A deeply unattractive woman.

 

TART FUEL

Bottled Alcopops, e.g. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women.

 

TITANIC

A lady who goes down first time out.

 

WALLACE AND GROMIT

Rhyming Slang for 'vomit'.

 

WYNONA RYDER

Rhyming Slang for 'cider'. e. g. "Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a

bottle of tart fuel please Doreen"

 

 

;)

:lol: :lol: i say britneys for beers :P breaking the seal-i used to always say that!!! :lol: :rolleyes: i like them!!! :lol: :lol:

LMAO!!! OH YES!!!!! GENIUS!!

 

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

i'll have a full nelson and a packet of quenton's :dozey:

:lol: Preparin r ya DrP?

:cool:

:lol:

i'll have a full nelson and a packet of quenton's

Salt n vinegar? ;)

lol@ titanic!