Brent

I'm here. Hey.

My dog has issues with dingleberries

LOLz @ acne problems

I passed gas earlier today lulzz Scared my dog

Is it creepy that I'm basically addicted to this song? [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0v8rCZazrA]We Suck Young Blood (Your Time Is Up) [w/ Lyrics]- Radiohead - YouTube[/ame]

Nah I still have self-esteem, but you go for it.

WE SUCK YOUNG BLOOOOOD

Nah. They have more of a life than I.

That's boring

147.3 I feel like a nerd :disappointed:

What did you do with your 10,000th one? I missed it.

Yeah probably. I'm going to hit 5,000 soon. What should I do with it?

Oh, it was my pleasure. :)

This has way too many posts

^ Awesome. Which station?

People are so ridiculous

I know man.

Pablo Honey suxx

Wedding Bellz leik omg

Hail to the Thief

I'm listening to Radiohead

Talk to me

I'm bored

Ugh I've been typing for like an hour

Sorry this is so long. I just had to tell someone about it (get it out of my mind and into the open), and you guys are pretty cool. So here you go. I don't really know what I wanted to accomplish by posting it: Whether it's meant for discussion or just consumption. Maybe neither. But something makes me want to tell the story. _ The other day, I went out to a bar with a professor/mentor that I spend a lot of time with. He’s awesome. Anyway, we were at said bar for a while, and we met a few people there. They were all pretty neat, so when it was time for my professor to go, I decided to stay with this group for a while. I’m pretty outgoing and I love meeting new people/having new experiences. So I spent quite a bit of time with this group. They all came by themselves to the bar, but I think they knew each other already because they frequent the location. It was a new kind of place to me because I’m pretty young (in college) and I generally go out to bars and clubs that are overcrowded, loud, and low on camaraderie. After a while I met a man who was a little more reserved than the others, and I started talking to him during a lull on the conversation. He looked about 35 years old (I think…I never bothered to ask his age). And, after a little while of small talk, I was able to learn that he was a minister at a local church. While I’m not a religious person per se (I consider myself more spiritual than institutionalized), I am fascinated by people who essentially volunteer their lives to work to spread the word of God (whatever that may be). I started to talk to him about a myriad of issues pertaining to faith, glory, idealism, etc. The man is very clearly passionate about his position. He volunteers his extra time to helping the local community. He’s very charitable and selfless: Definitely more of a man than I’ll ever be, that’s for certain. And, judging by the time we spent together talking about faith before he pried his charity work, he was extremely humble. I found this man simply inspiring. Later, he told me the caveat: He is not just a minister. He’s a gay minister. When he told me this, he was less confident than he had previously been. The bottle in his hand shook with wavering caution and his eye contact, which was previously intensely confident, became cold and distant. In fact, he told me that I was the first person he's told in Columbia (despite just learning who I am...which is weird). So I, observing the shift in behavior (and understanding the obviously controversial issue at hand), asked him why he was so wary about his identity. He went on to tell me about his past. He was raised by a very religious family. So, obviously, God and spirituality was a very big part of his life. He realized that he was gay when he was about 14 years old, and, while trying to suppress it with Godliness, ignorance and selflessness, nothing worked. He eventually became sort-of comfortable with his identity, asked God for forgiveness, and continued. When he was a lost 17-year-old, he decided to come out to his parents, explaining that he’s confident that God made him that way. His parents were historically very kind and generous, smothering him and his brother with love and unyielding devotion. The next day, he was staying at a friend’s house because his parents, who had been supportive and loving until this point, kicked him out. He was left to fend for himself. Eventually, with a lot of hard work, he put himself through college in rural Missouri, and went to graduate school in Divination after deciding to become a minister. He paid his own way through college because he hadn’t talked to his parents since that incident. Throughout this part of his life, he shunned his sexual identity and stifled its development. His entire existence has thusfar been undercut through negativity. After college, he moved to Oklahoma to preach. He left Missouri behind him; not because it was particularly hateful, but because he associated it with darkness. He began his new life in Oklahoma. He preached there for a while. Known for his captivating sermons and impeccable wording, he quickly rose up the ranks. While he thinks that the Bible’s traditional interpretation was fatally flawed, he gave very different types of sermonic speeches. As one of the higher-ranking ministers in the church, he spent ALL his time with these people: He was in charge of the youth ministry and overseeing the youth summer camps. People trusted him and he was considered an integral part of the community, it seemed. When he wasn’t working, he was volunteering, feeding people and raising capital for the charitable organization. He shook up the religious identity of the town and was quite loved. So, naturally, because he was comfortable and welcomed by a big group of people, he decided to come out as a gay minister. He lived there for another year, but to him, work was never the same. He was stripped of his position as associate minister and was not allowed to volunteer with children or young adults. A year later, as he slept, a group of religious extremists burned his home to the ground. He was, essentially, labeled as an inhuman pervert and chased from the town. This took place in 2001. He has since moved about the Midwest as a guest minister, staying for about a year at a time at different locations. Only recently he has settled down in my town (where I go to university) and works for a local church. He attends many mission trips with high-school-aged young adults: All of whom believe he is a giant life force on them. He inspires people. However, because of his past experiences, he is not “out” as a gay man. He was forced to change his name in order to keep spreading the word of God: Something, to me, that is extremely noble. Dropping everything that makes him himself on a mission to reflect what he’s passionate about. He’s probably one of the best, most quality people that I have ever met. Over these times, he had been in a few (obviously very discreet) relationships with other men. It’s unrealistic to completely rule out that part of someone’s lives (he told me that that’s why he thinks the Catholic system is broken, and why it’s changing so quickly, citing the many cases of infidelity with their priests). He had a boyfriend a total of about 4 years, only to have his heart broken when he learned the man had been married. He didn’t go into this part of the story, but something tells me there’s more to it than that. So, after telling me his story, it was about 2am and the bar was closing so I went out and took a walk with the guy. I asked him, quite simply, why he was still so religious after it seemed that humanity was against him and his identity. SO many times he’s been fucked over by various religious bodies, and SO many times he’s had to pick himself up and move. Essentially, he’s not allowed to be himself. Ever. He just looked at me and told me that it’s worth it. He lightened up. While I’m not overtly, institutionally religious, I could identify with the guy. He was so passionate about his job and about his identity that it’s worth giving up everything over and over again just to feed that flame. I’m honored to know him. I'm hoping to talk to him more. I was pretty annoyed that evening, anyway, due to a couple girl issues I had, and problems I’ve had determining my future. I cheered up quickly after meeting this man. None of my problems, ever, will compare to the shit that this person has been through, just to do what he thinks is right. He’s come back from nothing so many times. To me, that’s incredible. /ridiculously long post