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I did one on the official board..might as well do one here


Family Guy quotes


Quagmire to two lesbians: You ladies ever been penetrated


Stewie: She needs to get laid, big time


Peter:Is that really the blood of christ? Damn, that guy must've been wasted 24/7


Lois: Ohh look at Stewie, isn't he adorable playing with his Sesame Street phone?


Ernie: Do you know what sound a cow makes?

Stewie: DON'T TOY WITH ME ERNIE!! I've already dispatched with Mr.Hooper, I've got six armed men stationed oustide Big Bird's nest... and as for Linda... well.. it's rather difficult for a deaf woman to hear an assassin approach, now isn't it?


Stewie: (stewie is fat at this point and cant make his arm meet his mouth)Damn you icecream, come to my mouth, how dare you disobey me! What are you looking at you infantile stupid, thats right, damn you and such

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Lois: Peter, what did you promise me?

Peter: That I wouldn't drink at the party.

Lois: And what did you do?

Peter: Drank at the pa-- ...Whoa! I almost walked into that one.


[Riding a circus elephant.]

Peter Griffin: Look Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a fat white guy who is threatened by change.

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lol. i really want to buy the dvd of this show. it's only like 42 bucks at wal-mart. woo!


remember when peter is trying to buy guns or something and they are like "how woud you like to pay?"

and peter says "umm do you except little bits of string?"

"sorry sir, store policy." and he points to the sign that says "we do not except little bits of string." lol.

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In the episode where Chris gets kicked out of the scouts.


(At a race)

Speed's Dad - Speed I don't think you should be in this racs AH HAH! The Mach 5 isn't ready at AH HAH!

Speed - But pops! I must be in the race!

Speed's Dad - Very well AH HAH! But you should know I'm not really you father AH HAH!



(Peter decides he's going to go to New York to the Scouts headquarters to get Chris back into scouts)

Speed - Hear that pops! The Griffins are heading to New York! Ah HAH!

Speed's Dad - THis will not affect us at all! AH HAH!

Speed - AH HAH!

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haha anybody remember the thing where peter was watching tv and he said something like "i've been watching tv so long the shows are starting to run together" and they showed this cop show with bert and ernie in bed together? :lol:


I REMEMBER THAT!!! hahahahaha..i laughed so hard!! I used to watch Sesame Street as a child!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Bert - Hello?..... ah son of a bitch, some poor bastard got his head blown off at an old factory called Hooper's.

Ernie - Bert, I don't like it when you swear Bert.

Bert - Oh yea? Well I don't like it when you eat cookies IN THE DAMN BED!

Ernie - Bert! You're swearing again Bert!

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