Saffire

Josh, check out my new iPhone:

We'll need guns. Lots of guns.

Let's show Muslim girls a good time. Take them out on the town, for one night. Bar hopping, house dancing, parkour, sex parties, lines of coke... you know, the works. Then we'll see if they like that burka or not! But don't let their daddies know, or they'll behead us.

Well this is a relief. Now I'm just waiting for the results from Tehran. I don't know if you guys have noticed lately, but I've had a team of protesters working round the clock there to make that place more gay-friendly, but there's still some resistance.

Oho, so you're the type who conquers a country by impregnating all the women! Genghis Khan did that, you know. I conquer countries by turning all the men gay. It's a lot quicker. HGTV and trance music, baby.

Should I add a link to my site in my signature? I'm afraid goofball will ban me for shameless advertising, but what the hell. I'll just open up another account in Belgium. BTW did you see what Mark Sanford has been up to lately? I thought I was the most interesting man in the world, but this cat's globetrotting to get tail in Buenos Aires while being Governor of South Carolina in his spare time! I'm totally inviting him for a spin on the boat sometime, and maybe I'll introduce him to your mother, Josh.

Are you kidding me? I've got no money, and nobody in their right mind would let me touch their hard-earned cash. Although I have been posting lately under a different username in the Current Events/Politics forum... I'm trying to get my hair straightener business off the ground. So far I think it's working, I've got like seven new hits to my site.

You should see my trick shots. To the billiards room! And I'll need a volunteer.

You want to learn things Josh? You want to learn how to make a shit load of money in the stock market today? We know the government is creating inflationary pressure. We know the first place new money flows in this type of environment is commodities. But as the economy recovers, equities inflate faster and over a longer period of time. So although we aren't sure of when the inflation will start, we can be reasonably certain it will be within the next few years. Use LEAPS, (long term equity appreciation contracts) to not only capture this movement when it happens, but also multiply its effect on your portfolio. You have to pay a premium for the long term nature of these contracts, but that will pale in comparison to the money you'll make once the inflation strikes. EDIT: For ideas about which stocks to buy LEAPS for, take a look at America's import/exports. Which businesses will benefit from a weaker dollar?

Find what it is you aren't good at... and don't do that thing.

Why hello. I'm just back from an expedition to the South Pole, it was beautiful. I've never seen so many stars in the night sky...

I've got a friend who calls things "this guy". So he'll be pointing to a particular wire leading from his computer to a speaker and he'll say "This guy is connected to the amp..." It's annoying, but I don't call him out on it because I don't want to look like I'm nit picking.

INTERESTING, not important! Jesus, I'd hate to be important. Too much responsibility.

I don't always drink beer... but when I do, it's Dos Equis. *butterfly lands on shoulder, hot women laugh around me*

You know... I have a sudden urge to buy a hair straightener product online. Do people honestly believe these ads work?

The fly represents your freedom.

Geez people, quit calling for stuff to be banned. If they want to dress like idiots, let them! Mark and others can retreat to their "burka-free zones" and not be bothered by it. This whole idea there's a "British culture" that must be upheld at gunpoint is ridiculous. For goodness' sake, don't become like Bill O'Reilly.

Once I started humping Steve Jobs when he was in the middle of announcing the 2nd gen iPod mini, because his turtleneck exposed some jugular. It was a faux pas for the ages.

Whispers to Mark: Mark, careful with your assertion that men are rational and ethical. Remember that women, being the weaker sex, rely on their perceived sexual power over men to inspire self-esteem. Yells: Why yes, Cobalt! When I see a girl's ankle I just can't control myself! Thank goodness for the police to make me think twice before I sexually harass women!

Well that's the beauty of it, we don't really need an explanation. It's rather apparent what was going on. The only question is, was it really the Japanese government that was trying to sell these bonds? Or were these men representing another government?

Religion is stupid in general, but I agree that you shouldn't "ban" anything. It's not like they're hurting other people by wearing the burkas (because I doubt they're all that good-looking to begin with... they're probably giving themselves too much credit!). Anyway, as Ron White says so eloquently, "You can't fix stupid."

Heh, something tells me this oil trader is long and he has a horse in this race! ;) But he's probably right.

Let's ban all clothes for hot people. Amendment 1: They're allowed to wear clothes in wintertime. Amendment 2: Hotness will be determined by the visitors of HotOrNot.com Those over 8/10 constitute "hot".

It's just the black color that's throwing him. I think if it were in white, there wouldn't be a problem:

Good point. This is a difficult situation for statists, because they honestly believe (how quaint!) that words have meaning when it comes to foreign relations. So if Obama utters the wrong combination of syllables, suddenly the Iranian government is "justified" in killing off this uprising. That's like something a 13 year old girl would think in a school cafeteria setting, but international politics is based on force alone. Truth be told, I really don't give a crap what Obama says about this. But it would increase his moral standing in the world one iota if he were to support the protesters. The other problem for statists is this isn't a democratic revolution. In all likelihood, most Iranians don't mind their current government. There's no proof the election was rigged, and Ahmadinejad has a very large support base (lower income, rural, retards). So the protests are being carried out by upper-class Iranians who are sick of being taxed to death and seeing their money go to these rural parts of the country. It's like the exact opposite of the French Revolution! That's frightening to governments everywhere, because it shows them that a revolution doesn't have to have majority-support to be threatening to their rule.