April 18, 200620 yr Isnt this what its all about? I want all of you to write for me, about the things that truely make you happy, or how you can be happy for longer then 10mins. I think its all about moderation. I love playing playstation sometimes, but if I sat around playing it all day, I'd go insanely depressed. I also like the feeling of getting work done, or going to the gym, but if I did it all the time, yeah, depression. I'm beginning to discover the importance of discovering happiness in the things I do, and I just am not a happy person unless I'm working hard at things. I dont enjoy doing a lot of things I usually would, if I'm spoiling myself a lot I get sad, because nothing seems great. Even just the little things, I went for a meal today, and just had the most boring time, because I'm always going for meals, going out, just doing nothing with my life, and when I do that all the time its like there are no highlights to my day or life, its all just mushed into one. I'm still happy but, I just realise at times like when I go for a meal, or when I go golfing, or when I do anything, Im not having a great time, I'm not even having a good time, I'm just bored, and when I do work and do things with my day that I may not particularly love, it makes those other things more enjoyable, feels like I've worked hard for it. My equation for happiness- 25% of my time doing things I love 25% of my time doing things I like 25% of my time doing things I dont mind 25% of my time doing things I hate = :)
April 18, 200620 yr well I think real work is good, being outside and excersizing is good. but no matter what you're doing if you don't have friends who do things with you then I don't think you'll feel good... and being with someone or people at times when you're lonely is good too. But I believe that at least for me... I have to work to feel good... if I do no work I'm not happy. I don't know why... at least that's the way I am now, maybe that will change.
April 18, 200620 yr Playing saxofon makes me happy....improving in playing it makes me happy....making music in bands makes me happy....achieving things makes me happy....one of the most important things that make me happy:being consequent!
April 18, 200620 yr Author Yeah exactly, I need to do some work in order to be happy, but obviously not all of the time. If I'm working at stuff I dont like for a lot of my day, it'll make me really happy to get out of the house and be with friends or go for a meal with my family.
April 18, 200620 yr i know EXACTLY what you mean. i often feel that i am struggling with a depressed emotion. The things that i used to love no-longer make me happy, because i do them too much. surprise and viaririty is needed, having many things to chose from, structure makes me happy, well it stops me thinking about how unhappy i really am, a distraction, keeping my mind busy. Ive been trying for a long time to be truely happy...but i find having enough alone time makes me feel better. I cant deal being around people all of the time. I like knowing someone is there, being able to have contact, but not having to reveal to much, get too close and cut away without having to give a reason. Thats why i find web forums good for me.
April 18, 200620 yr i do believe we're living in the big part for the future (to make it better) and in a little part for ourselves. so i would say if my family, friends, girlfriend who live around me are happy then i'm happy as well. but actually i can't be happy for 100%...if i think about all those worldwide problems, it always makes me sad. and 1 person can't change it... :/ IMO nobody can be happy for 100%
April 18, 200620 yr Author Playing saxofon makes me happy....improving in playing it makes me happy....making music in bands makes me happy....achieving things makes me happy....one of the most important things that make me happy:being consequent! Hehe I dont mean just naming the things that make you happy, but how you use them with other factors of your life to keep you consistently happy. Everyone enjoys doing different hobbies, but they wont always make you happy. I honestly dont understand how my brother is so happy, I hate to be mean, but he doesnt have a lot right now, I think... But hes always so upbeat
April 18, 200620 yr Hehe I dont mean just naming the things that make you happy, but how you use them with other factors of your life to keep you consistently happy. Everyone enjoys doing different hobbies, but they wont always make you happy. I honestly dont understand how my brother is so happy, I hate to be mean, but he doesnt have a lot right now, I think... But hes always so upbeat Haha..... so...shall I tell you something? I can't tell you anything spontaneously that makes me happy....haha...
April 18, 200620 yr Author Yeah Nik good point, I wrote it somewhere in another thread that asked the question something rhetorical like "If you were poor, but happy all of the time" I said that its impossible to be consistently happy all of the time, because the novelty of anything wears off. The happiest feeling of all, is love, its the height of happiness for me, giving and recieving it, but with love comes pain, sometimes you have to fight through things, sometimes its not easy. The amount of pain you feel in love is extreme, but in feeling it, you also get to know the extreme joys of it, and that makes total sense to me. By the way the fact that you cant feel 100% happy all of the time is my main reason in not believing in an afterlife of eternal happiness.
April 18, 200620 yr Ok.....I'll have another try... Maybe it is my little sister....yes...I realised this again yesterday....she sometimes brings me back into my careless childhood....this makes me happy...just to forget my problems....and have fun with her....and that she can learn from me.....that I can show her things..... you mean things like that?
April 18, 200620 yr Author Ok.....I'll have another try... Maybe it is my little sister....yes...I realised this again yesterday....she sometimes brings me back into my careless childhood....this makes me happy...just to forget my problems....and have fun with her....and that she can learn from me.....that I can show her things..... you mean things like that? Well its another example of something that makes you happy, but like you wrote, she sometimes does that, not all of the time, if that happened, would it still make you happy? I dont think so. Finding happiness is the most important thing in life, but its never easy, even for those who have great control of their life (Im one of those people) they still dont know what to do with their time to feel a true sense of un-superficial happiness.
April 18, 200620 yr actually i don't really like to talk about happiness. because i feel i'm not happy at all (some happy moments happen like for example today : my fave football team won). but i miss something or maybe somebody. everything around me is making me to think a lot this time. i can't be happy atm :(
April 18, 200620 yr Ok....wow.....you really made me thinking now....but actually I'm too tired...I'll keep that in mind...I want to find out now!
April 18, 200620 yr actually i don't really like to talk about happiness. because i feel i'm not happy at all (some happy moments happen like for example today : my fave football team won). but i miss something or maybe somebody. everything around me is making me to think a lot this time. i can't be happy atm :( well, i feel the same way right now. obviously there are a lot of thing which aren't going well in my life right now, but still there are things that can make me happy. most the time only for a moment, but can you be happy for a long time anyway? i actually don't think so. sometimes really small things can make me happy, like meeting somebody i haven't seen for a long time or just having a good time with my friends. but i totally agree that things, which you always do can't make you really happy anymore. when you couldn't do them for a long time, it just feels great doing them again.
April 18, 200620 yr I think the majority of my decisions are on this path to happiness. But it takes a bit of a sidetrack sometimes. I mean, sometimes in my life I've chose between being happy myself and making someone else happy. I usually choose the other person, but that's what I see as a small sidestep on this path. I think I'm on hot pursuit.
April 19, 200620 yr i have this book at home in my bookshelf titled 'how to be happy' some person has written a book on how to achieve happiness ive never actually read it but i flicked though the contents and it goes on explaining what makes someone unhappy and what you can do to think positive and be happy! i lent it to my friend once and she said it really helped her out, though i dont know whether it would just make you more paranoid or what
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