The 25 Biggest Wusses … Ever!

From soft-rock mewlers to preachy vegans to just plain wedgie-deservers, Blender salutes the most awesomely wimpy musicians of all time.

 

By Josh Eells, Steve Kandell, David Peisner, James Slaughter and Rob Tannenbaum

 

Blender, July 2006

 

25. Robert Smith

24. Donovan

23. Nsync

22. Natalie Merchant

21. Pat Boone

20. Garth Brooks

19. Bread

18. Common

17. Metallica

16. Paul McCartney

15. Christopher Cross

14. Cat Stevens

13. Belle and Sebastien

12. Graham Nash

11. Barry Manilow

10. Hilary Duff

9. Chris Martin

All Yellow

Chris Martin

It’s not his posh background. It’s not that he went to college. It’s not that he played field hockey there. It’s not his teetotalling or the fact he was a virgin until 22. (Okay, it’s a little of that.) What really makes Chris Martin so drippy are those needy, apologetic tunes: He begs, he pleads, he crumbles, he crawls, he’s lost, he’s scared, he’s sorry and he misses you. Plus: He plays a girl’s instrument (who said that pianos are female instruments??? WTF??? LMAO:stunned:)

Wussiest Moment: Being derided as “a bit wimpy” by noted ruffian Charlotte Church.:angry: :angry:

8. Babyface

7. Rascal Flats

6. Kenny G

5. Peter Cetera

4. Boyz II Men

3. Dan Fogelberg

2. Nick Lachey

1. James Taylor

 

i agree with lots of em, but this is the silliest top 25 ever!

:laugh3:

 

 

 

 

Full article here!

http://www.blender.com/guide/articles.aspx?ID=1990

hmmm, it seems Chris isn't too popular there lol

Boo. He also plays the guitar! Aww.. poor Chris! :laugh4: and Belle and Sebastian, and Common.

 

twat and Paul McCartney. :dead:

That's what i thought!

Sumtimes, journalists dont have anything else to do, but do silly countdowns.

:laugh3:

Who sais the piano is a girls' instruments?!? Tell it to Beethoven, Mozart, Gowan, Liam from Hothouse Flowers, peter Gabriel...so many others.

 

I'd be honoured to share that list with most of the ppl on it...well, maybe not NSync or Garth...but overall, I'd be in pretty good company!

Well he's probably the last person in Coldplay that you'd want backing you up in a fight.

I wonder how Metalica's fan are taking the news :laugh3:

 

All I have to say for Charlotte Church (who I actually liked once upon a time) is that when Liam Gallagher thinks you're the next Liam Gallagher, you know you've got problems...

WHERE THE HELL IS JAMES BLUNT!?!?!? that man is a pussy.

WHERE THE HELL IS JAMES BLUNT!?!?!? that man is a pussy.

 

:laugh3:

 

Really, since when was the piano a girl's instrument? Most freaking great composers are men! :laugh3:

they just jealous cuz they can't make playing piano look THAT good. :P

they just jealous cuz they can't make playing piano look THAT good. :P

 

yes. Chris has revolutionized the chair-humping industry :laugh3:.

How do they know what age he lost his viginity...did he ever declare that? lol Posh background? Wait, just because he's a brit right?

 

What a stupid list. I suppose Chris should crash parties and cheat on his wife...then he'll be cool. Oh yeah, Chris. Stop playing piano. Play...........the electric guitar and when you're done, smash it.

 

:guitarist:

they didn't even take into account his bad ass paparazzi killer side.

 

if you're a wuss if you smash a guy's windshield and get arrested for it... :laugh3: what the hell is a wuss?

 

^edit: ohhh, and i think he did admit that he lost his virginity in his 20s or something. but knowing chris, he could've been, you know, exaggerrating some things. :P

 

...and i don't see what's so bad about losing your virginity at 22 anyways. :uhoh:

 

40--okay, that's kinda bad, but 22 is fine... i think. :uhoh:

I wouldnt't want to meet him in a dark alley...he'd probably tell me to go to Weight Watchers or somethin'...lol!

they didn't even take into account his bad ass paparazzi killer side.

 

if you're a wuss if you smash a guy's windshield and get arrested for it... :laugh3: what the hell is a wuss?

 

^edit: ohhh, and i think he did admit that he lost his virginity in his 20s or something. but knowing chris, he could've been, you know, exaggerrating some things. :P

 

...and i don't see what's so bad about losing your virginity at 22 anyways. :uhoh:

 

40--okay, that's kinda bad, but 22 is fine... i think. :uhoh:

 

:laugh3: I know why the heck is 22 a bad age? I guess loosing it at 14 is the ideal age these days. :stunned:

 

But I never get how when Chris is asked about the paparazzi he says he doesn't mind and likens it to dealing with roaches if you work in a diner. Meanwhile, he's attacking photographers. hahahahaha Or he's always looking like he about to bust a cap if he's not. Modest Chris.

BEETHOVEN WAS A FREAKING WUSS, GUYS, GET OVER IT LOL. *breaks bottle over head*

 

All joking aside. Chris Martin is on a list right by Hilary Duff.

 

It's journalist season, Doc. *cocks gun*

This is just stupid.. I would be laughing at Chris being part of such a list, but next to Nick Lachey and Hilary Duff?? That's just stupid..

I'd like to know who said that Chris was a wuss. They were certainly WRONG! Since when is it that only chiks can play the piano?? All these guys who play footy and rugby and think their legends are pathetic. Since when did sport touch the lives of millions of people around the world like Chris can . They must be jealous!! Somehow a man spills his heart out and is criticised to death. I am absoulety disgusted at the worlds view on things today. :angry:

I thought that lists were just SOOO 2001 :dozey: :sleeping:

Metallica got what they deserved!

Ha!

Some kind of a wuss!Rofl!

the piano aint a girl's instrument! everyone can play it! arrggghhh crazy journalists

piano isnt a girls instrument no, all the people i no who play it are lads. and chris is too gawgus to be wuss. but even if he was id still love him! haha.

:laugh3: I know why the heck is 22 a bad age? I guess loosing it at 14 is the ideal age these days. :stunned:

 

But I never get how when Chris is asked about the paparazzi he says he doesn't mind and likens it to dealing with roaches if you work in a diner. Meanwhile, he's attacking photographers. hahahahaha Or he's always looking like he about to bust a cap if he's not. Modest Chris.

 

i know, nowdays, kids at 12 are having lives compared to the women in sex and the city! :laugh3::laugh4:

 

im seriously tired of ppl bashing coldplay and especially chris just because he doesnt wreck hotel rooms, sleeps with groupies, doesnt get high on a regular basis, and eats vegetables instead of junk food.

:laugh3:

Why is Metallica on there?

Metallica being on there makes Chris seem like a big baby- no- a fetus!

the piano aint a girl's instrument! everyone can play it! arrggghhh crazy journalists

 

Yeah definitely..

Just think of Richard Gere playing the piano in "Pretty Woman".. or Chris Martin playing piano in a gay bar :P I love this imagination of a guy sitting down at the piano, playing you a wonderful song..