This, can always be a tough one, a relationship maker, or, a relationship breaker (How do I think of this stuff?!)

 

I really dont know which is worse, being the person who says it too early, and finds out the other person isnt quite there yet, or being the person who isnt ready for such a commitment.

 

Silly, aint it? 3 freaking words. I wish the whole thing didnt exist, I really do.

I think it really depends on who the person is and whether you really do love them or not. But if you think they don't love you back it's probably not a great idea to say it...I don't know. I don't remember the first time I said I love you to him.

I can't vote. Because in my country we know 2 different meanings of English "I love you."

 

1st one is kind of similar to "I like you" and can be said basically to anyone you know and like as a person. it's also used in love relationships, and it means a lot to your "better half". well, at least it should.

 

2nd one has its full meaning connected with true love, but it's rarely said. well. it has a really strong meaning and i somehow not dare to say it, because i know it's not quite true.

 

 

so, uhm ... so the 2nd version really can't be used after being together for a month or so because you don't even know the person you're going out with, not so well. but then again, when do you know him/her well enough to say it? you can get married and then find out that your spouse is a complete bastard.

:stunned:

 

That was intriguing!

:stunned:

 

:confused: huh?

but it's ... true! :(

I think it's worse to be the one who hears 'I love you' and can't possibly squeeze any words out. It's like, come on, make up your fucking mind.

^Oy...that is tough. I mean really what do you say if you don't love them back...?

you stay quiet? not a solution i guess... but is there any other way to say you dont love them back?

^ Maybe you could just give them a hug and say I have to go?

perhaps... but the person who said "i love you" would be quite heart broken... or... i don't know. :\

Im a Pride'n'Dignity kinda fella, so Id probably hate it more to be the first to say it.

 

But that shouldnt really happen (Haha no Im not being cocky) as you should be sure, you should know, and unless theres some crazy reason to rush it like youre leaving the country, theres no excuse for saying it before that safe period of definately being in love.

 

I voted 3 months, as in, between 3-6 months.

You say it when you mean it.

As corny as that sounds.

 

I do think though that to love someone it takes time.

Well, when you mean it?

 

Thats hard to distinguish, its not like an on/off switch.

 

If everyone said it as soon as they think they feel it, then whats the chances of the other person waking up that exact same day and suddenly feeling the same way, and both of em rush towards eachother to say it?

 

Maybe Im being too technical. Teehehehe.

 

But yeah, I believe that even when youre sure youre in love with someone, you should wait to sort of scope out if they feel the same way. Otherwise there would be a lot more disappointing relationships.

^Oy...that is tough. I mean really what do you say if you don't love them back...?

Arrrh definitely not 'Thank you', that's the worst. I don't know, just nothing probably.

 

The worst thing is that in this situation you may even love a person, it's just... Sometimes when the confession is so sudden there's no way you can even think of what you really feel, it's like a lump in your throat, so you stay quiet while another person goes crazy.

^Sounds like this has happened to you...

Haha yeah, absolutely horrible.

 

Especially if you like them, and you think its going somewhere, but maybe not to that 'love' point just yet, because it should be respected as another level of commitment.

 

And I think "I love spending time with you too" would be worse, because it doesnt even acknowledge the original 3 words. My friend did that, nummy.

"I love spending time with you too"

 

Ouch....

Awwww *hugs Reilly*

*Feels the warmth* :nice:

Aww...sofia you better watch out!

Well, when you mean it?

 

Thats hard to distinguish, its not like an on/off switch.

 

If everyone said it as soon as they think they feel it, then whats the chances of the other person waking up that exact same day and suddenly feeling the same way, and both of em rush towards eachother to say it?

 

Maybe Im being too technical. Teehehehe.

 

But yeah, I believe that even when youre sure youre in love with someone, you should wait to sort of scope out if they feel the same way. Otherwise there would be a lot more disappointing relationships.

 

I don't know, I've never really been in a real relationship.

But love is a sure thing, you know when you love someone.

I know it sounds really cliche but its a definite feeling.

 

At a point in time I was in love with someone but I never told them because I knew they only loved me platonicly...I think a person can see it in someone when they love them, and if you don't see it in them, you should wait for them.

But that shouldnt really happen (Haha no Im not being cocky) as you should be sure, you should know, and unless theres some crazy reason to rush it like youre leaving the country, theres no excuse for saying it before that safe period of definately being in love.

 

 

Having those words said to you before they leave the country is such a heartbreaking thing to experience. I wouldn't suggest anyone tell someone how they feel just before they leave overseas. You should keep it to yourself, and should you still have those feelings when/if you return, then tell that person, but doing it in a very last-minute-i'm-off-to-another-country way leaves the reciever of those words feeling quite helpless.

 

To actually answer the question, you have to be sure of 2 things: whether what you feel is really love, and when is the right time to tell him/her. I'm seriously no expert on the matter, so I'm only drawing on personal experience and experiences from close friends, but if you realise you love someone, you need to know the right time to tell them. If you tell them too early as in before they know how they feel, then you've exposed yourself, you're vulnerable. I perfer to hold off as I can see little wrong with doing so. It gives both your feelings time to develop and sus out whether you're right for the other. So in all, the right time (for me) is after a long time.

 

Having said that, it's different for everyone.

 

Anyway, for some reason I tend to think it should be the guy to say it first. I've never said it first which is probably why I've grown to assume the man should be the first to say it.

Why is there such a need to say it anyway. Two people can maybe just spend all their life together without saying these words.

Why is there such a need to say it anyway. Two people can maybe just spend all their life together without saying these words.

 

Yes - ask Prince Charles!!:P