Essexbird Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side - These are our rules! Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it. 1. Saturday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair. The hair we'd like them to cut, they seldom do!! 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints Do Not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just f***ing say it! 1. We don't remember dates. Mark anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand. 1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress? 1. "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girly mates are for. 1. Check your oil! Please. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is in-admissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you upset or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we. 1. All men see in only 16 colours, like the Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to - expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really! 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. NO! No, you really do have too many shoes. 1. Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 To tell the truth, it's the best tyhread i've ever seen!!!!!!! Essexbird, you're the best.... wow......!!!!!!! Amazing just amazing!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Essexbird Posted August 31, 2003 Author Share Posted August 31, 2003 aw thanx! :blush: :blush: :blush: Glad you enjoyed it!! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 we should send the message for all the boys of the forum!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettercat Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 Haha, I always get it in my mailbox - it's so funny :D :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Essexbird Posted August 31, 2003 Author Share Posted August 31, 2003 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Dare you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 I'll do it!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Essexbird Posted August 31, 2003 Author Share Posted August 31, 2003 :D Wow! You post fast!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
About A Girl Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 HAHAHAHAAHH! thats freakin funny! ok im sending this to austin! lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 im sending to jacob!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Essexbird Posted August 31, 2003 Author Share Posted August 31, 2003 I gotta go! See you later! :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
About A Girl Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 NNOOO!!! you cant leave us! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 bye bye.... :embarrased: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Essexbird Posted August 31, 2003 Author Share Posted August 31, 2003 sowy! it's hubby's birthday today so I'm being nice and going to organise a birthday surprise! :wink3: :wink3: :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 happy birthday!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoogieJ Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 LOLOLOL the Toilet seat one was an absolute classic I've used that arguement with women so many times...we have to put it up, so live with having to put it down Oh and the colours one LOL...what is mauve? :D I see in probably 16 colours Red, yellow, blue, green, orange, purple, black, white, beige, brown, scarlet, crimson, turquoise, cyan, indigo, violet :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tifosi Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 fantastic... come on girls prioritise not accesorise!! :) .... ***starts running...*** :rolleyes: :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 wow your avatar is just so funny!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noni Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 Aaaaah, really funny... my ex-boyfriend also sent it to me a few months ago :dozey: But I also have the 'female rules'... I think I'm gonna searching for it in my pc :wink3: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leaver Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 1. I have long hair 2. guys always think of girls!!!! 3.1.72m for 55 kg (right weight) et toc! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityandColour Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 that certainly was interesting :o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
About A Girl Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 hahahah you know most of it is true.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityandColour Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 it is? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amor_optimista Posted August 31, 2003 Share Posted August 31, 2003 That's so funny! Thanks for posing it Essexbird. It's very very true, scary really.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.thumb.jpeg.0c38b425ec17c7ec66d8efbe45457660.jpeg)
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now