7 Reasons To Shop Online

[Black Rose]

1. Queues. Sometimes, shops are busy and there are long queues. Having spent the previous ten minutes standing in a queue for the checkout, many people are taken by surprise when they are asked for money. Once they get over the shock of this unanticipated event, they proceed to spend an inordinate amount of time fumbling for cash, cards or vouchers in their pocket, wallet or handbag (sometimes all three), thus making everyone else’s wait in the queue even longer. Approximately 50% of the people in the queue will do this. When an online shop is busy, their servers are sometimes slow, which causes pages to load slowly. This gives you time to practice drumming on the desk or to sing show-tunes from Fiddler on the Roof which, on balance, is better than murdering idiots in Borders.

 

2. Scary Man.

 

 

I saw this man at the shops.

 

3. Creativity. If you have too much beer, you can’t go shopping. You tend to stumble about, get distracted and forget things. You may even fall over or get asked to leave the shop. When shopping online though, drunkenness is a virtue, as it lowers our inhibitions and brings our creative tendencies to the fore. In the same way that all of the best ideas happen in the pub (and are sadly often forgotten), all the best shopping ideas occur when under the influence. Why buy your partner perfume or aftershave, lingerie or underpants in a shop when you can have a few beers and get them a pan in the shape of a fried egg, a map of New Zealand, an illuminated bust of Beethoven and a biography of Charles Lindbergh? You can also get yourself a new bicycle while you’re at it.

 

4. Happy cat. When you have to go to the shop for groceries, you tend to pick up a couple of tins of cat food at a time. When you shop online, you stock up. The monthly online grocery shop is like Christmas for cats.

 

 

5. Attire. When you visit the shops, you have to dress normally, or people will point at you and security guards may follow you around. When you’re shopping online, however, you can wear whatever you want. If you’re fond of hats, you can wear a pith helmet, a Davy Crockett hat, a top hat or a straw boater without feeling at all self-conscious. If you’re not fond of hats, you can wear whatever costume you like. You could dress up as a Louis XVI or a pirate – you could even dress up as a bear, though this might hamper your ability to use the keyboard and may cause you to order too much salmon.

 

6. Teenagers. The over-made-up 15 year girl at the Superdrug checkout who hates you for reasons that you don’t understand doesn’t scowl at you, and sigh when you tell her that you don’t require a bag, when you shop online. You may not recall treading on her puppy but at some point during a transaction with her, you will wonder if you have.

 

7. Christmas. When you shop online your senses aren’t assaulted by gaudy decorations, flashing lights, glittery stuff or baubles, unless that’s what your own home looks like, in which case you probably won’t mind. You will not bang your head on all of the decorations which were hung from the ceiling by an inconsiderate short-arse (for blind people this is a serious issue) and you will not have to listen to Stop The Cavalry once, let alone thirty times. I hate Stop The Cavalry so much that I’m tempted to write Stop The Stop The Cavalry. I probably will do, in a queue in a shop while waiting for people who’ve just discovered that they need to exchange money for goods.

 

http://7reasons.org/2009/12/07/7-reasons-to-shop-online/

 

Sorry but I found it funny

[AnnaElisabeth]

:laugh3:

So does this justify my excessive ebay shopping? No? :sad:

[SueDeNimes]

There's a funyn advert in the cinemas at the moment that advertises online shopping and jokingly says you can't catch the swine flu on your PC. :lol:

 

When I saw the thread title I thought it would be about that!

[flickahidalgo]

I like to shop online, but shipping is a hastle.

[Black Rose]

I like to shop online, but shipping is a hastle.

 

So true

Funny how it seems

Always in time, but never in line for dreams

Head over heels when toe to toe

This is the sound of my soul,

This is the sound

I bought a ticket to the world,

But now I've come back again

Why do I find it hard to write the next line

Oh I want the truth to be said

[EmmaLouiseSmyth]

i love trying on clothes in shops.

and the post charges can be a bitch.

 

*edit*

oh and when you find really nice stuff on a website.

and then find they don't deliver to your country.

 

 

Other than that for me,

shopping on the internet is great.

[SimpleBlur]

I like the second one. I see those all the time. :uhoh:

[flickahidalgo]

So true

Funny how it seems

Always in time, but never in line for dreams

Head over heels when toe to toe

This is the sound of my soul,

This is the sound

I bought a ticket to the world,

But now I've come back again

Why do I find it hard to write the next line

Oh I want the truth to be said

 

OHH, WHY DO YOU TORTURE ME WITH YOUR ANALYTICAL POEMS?! :inquisitive:

[Electric.Candy]

I don't shop online.

[Matter-Eater Lad]

I hate shopping online but since I mostly take XS or hard to find items, I have to for most my clothes.