Different perceptions

[Gitta Rensolo]

about being misinterpreted

I dom't care too much about it. it depends who I am talking to of course.....when I make a joke for example which is supposed to be sarcastic and it is directed to one person then I only do it with those people who I know best and who know me best. I don't think I'd do it with people I don't really know.

 

Same as opinions. I don't really care if people who I don't talk to regularly misinterpret my posts. If they are really interested in what I have to say they would probably talk to me about it further and it might clear things up.

 

About the general impression on here

Of course people perceive the things you say differently. Just like in real life and there is another dimension: How you act, move etc.....

for example: I used to be a rather shy person in real life some years ago, so I didn't say much when new people were around. There was a girl I got to know better and she told me that she thought that I was arrogant at first (and I was surprised about it).

 

 

Well, I don't know, but I think those people who interpret you and what you say the way you want them to are the ones you probably get closest with (if that makes any sense)

 

 

but you are right. Language is a thing that makes it even harder on here to be interpreted the way you want to be.

 

haha I hope I didn't misinterpret your thread:wacky:

[Prince Myshkin]

Blast from the past.

Happened again today when I was re-reading an old quote that I liked.

 

"The reasonable man adapts himself to the conditions that surround him... The unreasonable man adapts surrounding conditions to himself... All progress depends on the unreasonable man." George Bernard Shaw

 

Now originally I had seen a misquote of this, and therefore my interpretation was affected by this misquote. I had first been told that the last bit of the quote was 'The world is changed by the unreasonable man'. This led me to perceive the quote as seeing that the world is run by bad people as I emphasised the phrase 'unreasonable man' as something explicitly negative. When seeing the quote in it's original desired form, simply the language used in 'progress' (and of course it's easy to say language is important within a quote as that goes without saying) hints that the phrase 'unreasonable man' does not necessarily have to be negative, although can be. For example it could well be that the unreasonable man is only unreasonable in terms of not willing to accept the circumstances in which he lives in, for example if he is exploited, or if he is part of something he does not agree with, a freedom fighter or libertine if you will.

 

It seems so simple to understand now I have seen the quote in full, but for years I've misinterpreted that quote, and it evokes something completely different from me. Just figured I'd post it here since it kind of fits in with the theme of the thread.

 

Any one have any of these revelations of their own?

[NumbersGirl]

omg, boob is the same backwards and forwards :awesome:

The word BOOB is almost like 3 sets of boobs.

 

Thanks bunches, I'm gonna double-sig this. :nice:

[NumbersGirl]

So now answer Greg's original post.

 

I've often wondered the same thing. I agree that the biggest barrier to communication/understanding is language. Quite frankly I admire each and every member on here whose first language is not English. I can't imagine what it is like to not only process another language the way it is supposed to be, let alone seeing all of the slang, abbreviations, made-up words, etc. that you see here. Plus, as you mentioned Greg, I think sarcasm can easily get lost in translation regardless of what is your primary language, since it is not always easy to decipher "tone" in a post.

 

As far as the perception of people as a whole on the board versus in-person, I'd say it's a pretty accurate portrayal. I think it would be very difficult for someone to entirely put up a front that is not themself. Who they really are will seep through to some degree. When I first joined the board it was really hard to tell what people were like obviously, I thought some people were utter assholes until I kind of "familiarized" myself with how different people post on the board. (And that goes in the other direction, too.)

 

I've had the privelege of meeting quite a few people on here in person, and I'd say most (if not all) of them were pretty much how I (eventually) perceived them to be.

[the_gloaming09]

It was quite a long post but I got a chance to read it. I would have to agree with what you said pretty much completely. I think that peoples perceptions are really important and many times seen differently on this forum by each person. So for me I know that when I post I often will read over my posts to see if I'm being as clear as possible.

 

However regardless you can't expect everyone to take what you are saying exactly how you meant. Like you mentioned people are from different cultures, speak different languages and have different life experiences so they might not understand what you fully mean just because what they know has been different.

 

At the same time also I often find it extremely difficult at times to fully understand what a persons mood is in their post. With not being able to see someones face or hear their voice it becomes really difficult to see if someone is being serious, sarcastic, flirty, funny, angry, upset, etc. I myself know in the past that I have misread or thought I have misread other peoples posts and taken or seen a person another way than what they really are not only on the forum but in real life too (which in fact could just be for example a sacarstic person who appears to be an asshole, or a really friendly person that seems flirtatious).

 

Of course there are things that can help a little like I think emoticons, but even so it's difficult to fully know.

 

I have only met briggins in terms of people online, but my perception of meeting him in real life was pretty much what I was expecting and he seemed like the same person. For me for example I think that at my most outgoing that I am how I post, but I'm usually quiet or reserved particularly with people I don't know. Even so I think for the most part the way that a person posts gives a good idea of how they really are.

 

Interesting topic though.

[The Escapist]

I am amazed from of the 2.5 years that I have been posting on this board, how well you can get to know people. It's almost certain that you will find something in common with someone in someway, whether it be a band or pretty much any aspects that is discussed, and how, often unlike in real life, the friendship develops rather quickly. In theory, it's quite funny that you can come to know and be friends with people on such a good level even though many of us have never met.

 

It is also interesting not only when you look at the cultures and the many age differences that people bring to the board, but the culture that has been created within the board itself. How, after being here a certain length of time, you understand how things are and how they work, what to expect from certain people and the things to stay away from. The importance of first impressions would also seem to be important, it probably affects your whole outlook on that person from then on. It is also interesting to note how different members are seen/treated/respected depending on how long they have been known by another member and what things they have experienced together on the board. Many of the people I see on the board I still perceive the same way as when I first got to know them in late 2008, even though they may have changed dramatically since then.

[Petit Prince]

So now answer Greg's original post.

 

I've often wondered the same thing. I agree that the biggest barrier to communication/understanding is language. Quite frankly I admire each and every member on here whose first language is not English. I can't imagine what it is like to not only process another language the way it is supposed to be, let alone seeing all of the slang, abbreviations, made-up words, etc. that you see here. Plus, as you mentioned Greg, I think sarcasm can easily get lost in translation regardless of what is your primary language, since it is not always easy to decipher "tone" in a post.

 

I don't think it's that difficult to learn English if you speak another European language. I'm not very good at learning languages but I've never found it particularly hard to understand people.

[Karencorpse]

People make fun of me because I see wind, when most people only feel wind without seeing it. Do others have different perspectives like that? Wind usually drives me crazy. I don't like windy days or being in front of a fan.

[Cyan Kat]

The trouble with perceptions is that in normal conversations a lot of our understanding is from body language and the tone of the voice and it's so easy to misread what people say or mean. I've always been pretty good at understanding what people say if they have trouble with english and I understand as my spanish is pretty terrible :blank:

[Prince Myshkin]

http://www.newscientist.com/special/the-grand-delusion

 

This might come as a shock, but everything you think is wrong. Much of what you take for granted about day-to-day existence is largely a figment of your imagination. From your senses to your memory, your opinions and beliefs, how you see yourself and others and even your sense of free will, things are not as they seem. The power these delusions hold over you is staggering, yet, as Graham Lawton discovers, they are vital to help you function in the world.

[ivet]

Originally Posted by ivet;4544439

^that's quite interesting, Greg :surprised:

.

[nouratan]

i believe this board just represents the real world nicely

we all want to be popular and liked

we have opinions which we don't want to change but want others to agree with us

and then forget that in the end we are all the same

 

with mostly same dreams and wishes

[ricardo]

I did read your whole post Greg (so you better read mine duude) and I'd first like to point out that you might like Sartre's Existensialism and Kant's Idealism.

As to languages as barriers like you kind of implied (lol) and as Lore said I disagree. Foreign languages are not the barriers, the barrier is language itself. Some things are so ambiguous that they are impossible to describe: A picture is worth a thousand words. I see how people speaking their mother language struggle to express themselves, most of the time this is due to a lack of vocabulary and learnedness, but sometimes you just can't find the precise word. If someone asked me to describe anyone's face in spanish I would really find it hard to do it and honestly I grasp widely my mother language. I mean, suppose that I say the width of that person's nose was mid. But mid is quite relative and this description would be extremely broad. Oral communication has its limits.

Then answering to another of your point (yeah I might not be doing it in order) misinterpretations exist in real life. First impressions are quite tricky, hence the saying don't judge a book by its cover. Unless you know profoundly any person you can't say if he/she is being sarcastic or serious and can't even know what he/she meant exactly. For example I consider myself a very cold, unexpressive and independent person. Yet I'm quite ironical and biting, some people would find that surprising given that I'm quite serious and respectful with almost everyone. I behave differently with different people and more than being hipocrital it's just not revealing myself because I need time to gain trust and see how the relationship should be dealed.

Then I'd like to add that we are bound to our own subjectivity, whatever we receive will be interpreted according to ourselves; and it goes both ways: whatever we send will be interpeted according to whom receives it and there's nothing we can do about it. Of course simple stuff will be received the same way, but more complex thoughts are often seen from many different angles.

In my opinion languages are the biggest barrier here. Whenever you're having an argument or you're trying to post a long comment (and english is not your first language) some people makes fun of your grammar and stuff and that makes me feel unconfortable even if it's a very stupid thing.

 

I also think the differences are not that big in a cultural way, I think you can find different kinds of people here just like in real life.

 

For me it's not just a board of strangers, it's easy to talk to people here and most of them are very friendly so it's easy to connect to them. Even if we live far from each other, we have something in common which means that even if our backgrounds are different, we still can relate to each other at some point. (not with everyone anyway)

 

Of course there are people I don't understand why they act in the way they do it but that also happens in the real world too.

Do you mean "make"?

:embarrassed:

:escaping:

Bromita :kiss: :hug:

 

PS: I find annoying and stupid that people ditch or mock other people's opinion just because they make some mistakes in a language that is not theirs. I'd like to see them speaking another language.

[Prince Myshkin]

I did read your whole post Greg (so you better read mine duude) and I'd first like to point out that you might like Sartre's Existensialism and Kant's Idealism.

As to languages as barriers like you kind of implied (lol) and as Lore said I disagree. Foreign languages are not the barriers, the barrier is language itself. Some things are so ambiguous that they are impossible to describe: A picture is worth a thousand words. I see how people speaking their mother language struggle to express themselves, most of the time this is due to a lack of vocabulary and learnedness, but sometimes you just can't find the precise word. If someone asked me to describe anyone's face in spanish I would really find it hard to do it and honestly I grasp widely my mother language. I mean, suppose that I say the width of that person's nose was mid. But mid is quite relative and this description would be extremely broad. Oral communication has its limits.

Then answering to another of your point (yeah I might not be doing it in order) misinterpretations exist in real life. First impressions are quite tricky, hence the saying don't judge a book by its cover. Unless you know profoundly any person you can't say if he/she is being sarcastic or serious and can't even know what he/she meant exactly. For example I consider myself a very cold, unexpressive and independent person. Yet I'm quite ironical and biting, some people would find that surprising given that I'm quite serious and respectful with almost everyone. I behave differently with different people and more than being hipocrital it's just not revealing myself because I need time to gain trust and see how the relationship should be dealed.

Then I'd like to add that we are bound to our own subjectivity, whatever we receive will be interpreted according to ourselves; and it goes both ways: whatever we send will be interpeted according to whom receives it and there's nothing we can do about it. Of course simple stuff will be received the same way, but more complex thoughts are often seen from many different angles.

 

 

 

PS: I find annoying and stupid that people ditch or mock other people's opinion just because they make some mistakes in a language that is not theirs. I'd like to see them speaking another language.

 

I read it all! And some day I will indeed look into Satre and Kant.

 

I also agree. I think I might have mentioned (if not I should have done) how everything is subjective, and in the same way that words may mean different things to different people, even if you both have the same Mother tongue (simply because they may conjure up different images in your head and you may have different reference points to another person for that word), you also have different ways of perceiving people, not including language. So I fully agree with you there.

 

I also agree that people see many different sides to an event. Some people might not consider one side, which others would find important. Like when you are discussing an event, and then somebody adds their opinion and says what they found interesting about it, and it's something you'd never even considered. Added to this, as you said, people may only see one side of things, because that is how much they are allowed to see. I myself a different around different people. I'm able to mix with lots of different types of people. If all of my friends were to be in one place I think I'd struggle to handle all of them at once haha.

 

And yes, you can always find a poor debater when they have to resort to arguing on semantics as opposed to the actual point that was first raised (unless that first point was indeed semantics).

[Electric.Candy]

The importance of first impressions would also seem to be important, it probably affects your whole outlook on that person from then on.

This. I remember one poster who, in a way tried to 'bash' on me when I was not even talking to her and I thought 'what a fucking bitch she is' and since then, I see her as this annoying bitch who bashes on other people when clearly, that cannot be true at most times. Or just not really true. Either that makes me sensitive or that person is just being a bitch. Who knows.

 

But l noticed some people have become, I don't know, aloof towards me whereas their approach towards me before was different, and I am guessing maybe because I can't relate to them anymore watsoever...and it is obvious who among in this board share the same wavelength; some people would be too cool to talk to you, and some would just not care, and be nice enough to talk everyone. The way I see people here is the way I see their posts. Most of us are claiming we are different for who we are on the board. Like when some of the popular posters on here are really introverted in real life....those things. It just shows that it is very easy for us to create a persona on the internet, whether that persona is better compared to us in real life or worse. Of course, some people will just be themselves. One thing I learned (nothing new though) is that to be recognized by some 'community' on the internet, you have to learn and adapt the 'behaviour' that the people in that 'community' have created. Or else you will just be overlooked at.

I have posting on this board for two years, and yet I have not made an impact to this board-making an impact I mean not just being outspoken, it's easy to gain admirers that way, but like I said, to 'go with the flow' of how the posters behave, or the thinks that they like. I would like to discard another reason that is, due the language that I use here being just a second language to me. Because I know some people here who are more noticeable than the others despite the degree of the english language they use. But yeah, to some extent it can be also the reason. I think I have stated before that I have too much inhibition regarding of expressing my opinions in general; I'm not talking about the language barrier type of thing

 

It's amusing to know whether the friends I've made on here are the ones whom I would be friends with when the opportunity gives us to see each other, all of us, in person. Maybe. But I'm pretty sure it would not only be them. I'm basically ranting about this (I don't even know if this post is within the topic, watevs) is because I agree with Nouratan's comment about this whole thing. Not that I crave for attention, don't get me wrong (for ef's sake), but just pointing out that each of us are viewed differently on the board so as in the real life. But hey, she's right. I think we all wanted to be acknowledged here or rather, just accepted. Isn't it the reason some of us can't leave this damn board is because of the friends we have here?

[LoryABjerre]

I do not want to defend myself because they drew my name on this thread. then I imagine we'll still insult me​​.

not believe in perceptions nor in existence just because of this :

 

Lory, How do i say this politely? I don't mean to be a kill joy or a Debbie Downer but I'm sorry dear, Not one of your sentences in your last post made any sense at all. At first it was funny to read what you had to say and we would all scratch our heads but now it's annoying and wasting the mods time to constantly remind you about this. Listen, I have had plenty of random posts and some of them were definitely not written in the Kings English after a glass of wine (0r 2 hence my siggy) But If you do want to be considered a legitimate member of this forum who loves Coldplay, do yourself a favor, learn a language, any language, and learn how to express yourself coherently so we can understand you.

 

Just my opinion.

[a_face_of_light]

I do not want to defend myself because they drew my name on this thread. then I imagine we'll still insult me​​.

not believe in perceptions nor in existence just because of this :

 

People arn't deliberatly insulting you but for the millionth time YOUR POSTS MAKE NO FUCKING SENSE, speak in French,German,Italian whichever is your native language instead because you sure as hell can't communicate to anyone properly in English, and after a year of the same old nonsensical bullshit, it's wearing a little thin.

[Electric.Candy]

^ preach it sister. I don't even know when did she started learning english.

[i'maveryneatMonster.']

http://www.newscientist.com/special/the-grand-delusion

 

Quote:This might come as a shock, but everything you think is wrong. Much of what you take for granted about day-to-day existence is largely a figment of your imagination. From your senses to your memory, your opinions and beliefs, how you see yourself and others and even your sense of free will, things are not as they seem. The power these delusions hold over you is staggering, yet, as Graham Lawton discovers, they are vital to help you function in the world.

 

 

Eh... I don't know but that doesn't seem right to me. I mean, it just doesn't make sense to me and I don't think that could be 100% correct. I believe we can formulate irrational thoughts everyday and act on those, and I even question myself at times if my perceptions of people in my daily life are correct or just mere illusions created by my brain and my constant thinking, since I tend to put a lot of thought on everything, but the thing here is that in my opinion, that sentence you posted isn't accurate in the way that it's impossible to prove that for sure (I guess so, I'm not familiar with any kind of psychiatric/mind education yet) and also it would be a bit outrageous if all of our thoughts were simply a "lie". I don't know if I made sense. That's my opinion.

[LoryABjerre]

time you're at my side you're not a monster and nobody will make you brainwashed psycho. to make you think you're a little shit.

because if not we are two monsters to seek the truth.

 

keep your mood "in love" I love you too,

 

exchanges and communications is just the perceptions true of the people .

[Prince Myshkin]

Eh... I don't know but that doesn't seem right to me. I mean, it just doesn't make sense to me and I don't think that could be 100% correct. I believe we can formulate irrational thoughts everyday and act on those, and I even question myself at times if my perceptions of people in my daily life are correct or just mere illusions created by my brain and my constant thinking, since I tend to put a lot of thought on everything, but the thing here is that in my opinion, that sentence you posted isn't accurate in the way that it's impossible to prove that for sure (I guess so, I'm not familiar with any kind of psychiatric/mind education yet) and also it would be a bit outrageous if all of our thoughts were simply a "lie". I don't know if I made sense. That's my opinion.

 

That wasn't my sentence, just so you know. I think you did know, I'm just making sure, so sorry if that sounds patronising. The best way would be for you to research it. Perhaps if you can buy a New Scientist from this week to explain things a little better. I have mine but I haven't read it yet as I've been busy. I'll try to explain it a little more conclusively when I have read it. I just stuck that on to spark debate, and then I was going to read up on it and add my opinion.

 

I know exactly what you are saying though, and I share part of that view. I'll let you know more when I've read it, which should be tonight :)

[LoryABjerre]

People arn't deliberatly insulting you but for the millionth time YOUR POSTS MAKE NO FUCKING SENSE, speak in French,German,Italian whichever is your native language instead because you sure as hell can't communicate to anyone properly in English, and after a year of the same old nonsensical bullshit, it's wearing a little thin.

 

I do not speak with you. you not hear me.

I have a good perception, because I read what you wrote.

 

and I have a tone for the writing. Eat!

 

Me now I eat what I have, because I have no money.

 

yes I am a total nonsense.

[a_face_of_light]

I do not speak with you. you not hear me.

I have a good perception, because I read what you wrote.

 

and I have a tone for the writing. Eat!

 

Me now I eat what I have, because I have no money.

 

yes I am a total nonsense.

 

 

STOP POSTING NONSENSICAL BULLSHIT it makes no sense and is really really annoying.

[i'maveryneatMonster.']

That wasn't my sentence, just so you know. I think you did know, I'm just making sure, so sorry if that sounds patronising. The best way would be for you to research it. Perhaps if you can buy a New Scientist from this week to explain things a little better. I have mine but I haven't read it yet as I've been busy. I'll try to explain it a little more conclusively when I have read it. I just stuck that on to spark debate, and then I was going to read up on it and add my opinion.

 

I know exactly what you are saying though, and I share part of that view. I'll let you know more when I've read it, which should be tonight :)

 

No I know it was from that New Scientist thing, and I can't really buy an issue but I'd like to know what it says, the study of the human mind is just based on so many hypothesis and like I've said, I don't actually think they can prove consistently that 100% of the things we think about are delusional.

[ricardo]

I get your point Alexa, of course not everything is delusional and perceptive, some things can be seen objectively but others simply can't.

I'm able to mix with lots of different types of people. If all of my friends were to be in one place I think I'd struggle to handle all of them at once haha.

Same here, it's funny that some of my friends don't gather....

 

 

Btw when I meant that I found annoying people complaining about grammar it was mainly about little mistakes, Lory take this as an advice: take English classes.