Ever been skipping? SUCH fun! You can pick up all SORTS of goodies when you go skipping! The art of skipping was perfected by my (sadly departed) elder sister, Rita. Over a long pot of Earl Grey and chocolate malted biscuits, she initiated me into the art of skipping.
It's best undertaken during the hours of darkness, thereby minimising the possibility of discovery and subsequent embarrassment. Take yourself off to the well-off places in town. In Bristol, this means Clifton, Sneyd Park, Westbury-on-Trym or Henleaze. In London, I daresay it would mean Knightsbridge or Chelsea. Once there, search about until you find a likely-looking builder's skip parked outside a house which is being renovated or worked on. Take a peep, remembering to always be mindful of lurking policemen or (MUCH worse) the occupiers of the house.
I must stop here and remind readers of the guidelines which apply if you're sprung. The first rule is DON'T try to deny it. Let's face it, you're copped. You may as well grin and admit it. You just had an overwhelming urge to go skipping. It simply overcame all common sense. Never before had such an urge come upon you with such force, such unbearable strength, that you could do nothing else but give way and give in. If you're quite honest and wide-eyed about it, your confrontator may well be completely disarmed and let you glide away with just a smile. They may even apologise for troubling you!
The other rule is NEVER say you're sorry. Remember, people put things in skips because they don't want them anymore. If you help yourself, then you're just doing the refuse disposal people a good turn - they have less to dispose of, and less waste is a good thing. May even help reduce global warming ...
In skips you can find anything from builders' rubble (can be good for hardcore if you're building a patio) to antique furniture. You can find that perfect little bentwood chair, perfect except for a broken seat, which can easily be mended. Cupboards with broken hinges, commodes with cracked poes, lamp-bases with no shades - and all for NOTHING!
My sister picked up a very good Christmas tree one Christmas Eve - just after the shops shut, one department store was already preparing for its January sales and was ditching the Christmas decorations. It was a tall tree, maybe 6' high, and not a needle left on its branches. But, sprayed silver, stuck in pot and decorated with baubles and silver lights, it looked wonderful!
So there you have it. Happy skipping!!