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Guest Grace

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what do you think about commiting suicide?

i guess we all thought about it, didn't we?

 

mhh...sometimes i just wanna die cause everything won't ever change. everything will stay the fucking same ... and everything stays as bad as it already is. i won't ever make my dreams come true and all that kinda stuff ...

the world would be a better place without me and all those stupid bastards i love, will finally care about me when i'm gone ...

that's what i think sometimes but on the other hand i think that commiting suicide is only for weak and powerless people.

people who are afraid of life ...

 

i don't wanna be a weak person. we all have to fight those same problems and if everyone will give up, the world would be freakin empty.

that's what keeps me away from that thought.

maybe someday my dreams come true! ('if you never try, you'll never know ...')

 

i wouldn't know how to do it anyway. i'm scared of any sorta pain ...

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i guess i agree with everything you said....but it is really strange to think that we all think about it at some point...

 

edit: i guess hope is what keep us alive

 

well, we all get very depressed at some point in our lives ...

it's normal to think about throwing all away ...,isn't it?! :embarrased:

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i guess i agree with everything you said....but it is really strange to think that we all think about it at some point...

 

edit: i guess hope is what keep us alive

 

well, we all get very depressed at some point in our lives ...

it's normal to think about throwing all away ...,isn't it?! :embarrased:

 

Of course it is. ;)

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I'm going to be frank, since this is a very serious topic.

 

Please don't think those thoughts, whether it be you or someone you know or someone reading this thread. Suicide hurts everyone, not just yourself. It changes peoples lives forever, and not for the better.

 

I've been depressed for almost 2 years now, and only recently sought help when I started to think these same thoughts. I would never do anything serious to myself, I know that, because I personally feel that suicide is incredibly selfish. But a lot of times you can't control the thoughts that go through your head, especially when you already have a chemical imbalance.

 

I know a lot of people openly mock kids who cut their wrists, or bring physical harm to themselves. Like people who cut themselves in the bathroom at school, then everyone laughs at them. It upsets me because I know that it's not something "stupid", it's a cry for help. Doing purposeful harm to yourself, however, for attention or to fit an "emo" stereotype IS dumb. Beyond dumb.

 

It shouldn't be normal to think about killing yourself. In fact, if you have these thoughts you really really need to talk to someone. I'm telling you, it helps a lot (and I'm not talking specifically to you, Headless Chick, but anyone who reads this). A lot of times I would think that I wish I were born someone else, someone different, someone stronger and without all these problems I have to deal with. But that's not going to happen. And if I took my own life, I know that would kill my parents, my innocent brother, my friends, the list goes on and on. I told my parents about how I was feeling, the pressures that I felt I couldn't deal with anymore, and I went to see a therapist, then a psychiatrist. It's helped me more than a lot.

 

 

I don't talk to people about this, not often at least, just because I'm a private person. But it's GOOD to talk about it, and if I can maybe help someone who's also depressed, I would feel so good (which is an understatement).

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I am terrified of the future, of not being successful, and mostly of watching the people I love die. I am terrified of pretty much everything that is uncertain. Those are the only thoughts that make me afraid to continue...but I would never kill myself.

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i'm afraid of failing ... afraid of not achieving my goals.

that would totally break my heart ...

 

failing although i worked my freakin ass off ...

wouldn't know what to do then.

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I'm afraid that I will never work my ass off for anything, so I will just end up with some lackluster life that makes me feel nothing. I just never have the will or the ambition to strive for things that I feel are too far out of my reach. I should start trying... :idea2:

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suicide : a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

my friend and i was talking about suicide. and she said that, and, like, i still think about it, but, i would never kill myself because i heard that. headless chick, you sound alot like me right now, except, mines more about physical apperance. lots has been going on, and i havent been talking to anyone, except last night. my friend listened to some stuff thats been going on. it felt really good, i didnt get it all out though. i want to get a diary to get everything out.

headless chick, i really recomend you find a close friend to talk too (sometimes, parents just dont understand ANYTHING, but if your close too them, go to them). it feels really good to get everything out. if you cant find anywhere to go, or if your too nervous too, get a notebook or a diary and write your emotions out, it feels really good to get all of it out of your system. whatever you do, just dont let it bottle up inside you. i did that, and lets say im just not in the best condition right now.

 

oh, an_cat. great post. i feel the same way about those "emo" kids. cutting is serious, and anyone who does it to fit in that label, is a dumbmotherfucker. sorry for the language. http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=14388 <funny.

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I think what my problem is (and hopefully this will soon be in past tense) is that I dream really big sometimes. I have huge ambitions to do all these incredible things with my life, like be a photojournalist, travel the world, make poverty history, etc etc. I've been having trouble focusing in school, and indeed caring about it at all. I feel like everything I'm being taught and forced to do each day is just crushing all these dreams I have. So I end up not doing things. Now I'm failing a few of my classes, which I've never done before. I've thought of dropping out often, because I just hate it so much. But I'm terrified of giving up and that ruining my future and all these things I really want to do.

 

After talking to my therapist and psychiatrist about my feelings of indifference, or avoidance, or fear of the future, they showed me that the world's not completely out to get me. Sure, there are lots of fucktards who'll screw you over, but you can't let them grind you down. You just have to take them and use them to make you stronger, and take your failures and do the same thing.

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yeah i tottaly love that.

yeah an_cat, that sounds a bit like me, huge dreams. im always taking on too much, every honors class, extra credit assingments, and i tried winterguard (its like, flag spinning and dancing). and i was like, exploding. i couldnt handle it, i sucked at winterguard because i didnt have the time to practice. and when i dropped out of it, i felt like the biggest FAILURE. so much more happened this semester, and i just havent been handling it so well.... i mean, i wouldnt kill myself, but ive always wondered if the world would change even a little if i wasnt here anymore, or if anyone would notice. etc.

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suicide : a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

my friend and i was talking about suicide. and she said that, and, like, i still think about it, but, i would never kill myself because i heard that. headless chick, you sound alot like me right now, except, mines more about physical apperance. lots has been going on, and i havent been talking to anyone, except last night. my friend listened to some stuff thats been going on. it felt really good, i didnt get it all out though. i want to get a diary to get everything out.

headless chick, i really recomend you find a close friend to talk too (sometimes, parents just dont understand ANYTHING, but if your close too them, go to them). it feels really good to get everything out. if you cant find anywhere to go, or if your too nervous too, get a notebook or a diary and write your emotions out, it feels really good to get all of it out of your system. whatever you do, just dont let it bottle up inside you. i did that, and lets say im just not in the best condition right now.

 

oh, an_cat. great post. i feel the same way about those "emo" kids. cutting is serious, and anyone who does it to fit in that label, is a dumbmotherfucker. sorry for the language. http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=14388 <funny.

 

i really like what you said (or wrote) ... especially "suicide : a permanent solution to a temporary problem. "

 

i have those two freinds. they think we're really close and stuff but i think we're not.

there's so much stuff they don't know bout me.

i'm talking and talking and talking but they're not listening. i feel like i'm talking to a wall.

they don't understand me. not at all.

it might sound a little stupid but i think i'm a little more marute than they are. it's just like i'm worried bout loadsa things ... .

i made some painful experiences in my life and my so-called friends don't know about it. i don't wanna tell them cause everytime i'm talking bout something serious ... they're like"yeah, okay ...whatever ... what do we wanna do?!" and that drags me down.

 

cahface, i think you are very mature! :D i mean, you're 14 just like me and you already think for yourself and you have your own opinion and stuff ... that's great

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haha thanks, i dont know, adults say the same thing to me, that im mature and such. my friends are always like, YOUR SO RETARDED AND STUPID, because i have my blonde moments. so im just like, k forget this. and i dont talk cause it really hurts when someone calles me retarded. its like, we forget that retarded actually means mentally challenged because of this pollitical correctness bullshit. and like, to call someone retarded who has no mental handicap, its like saying, haha de really did that? hes so cancer. NO SHUT UP LOSERFACE. okay im good :)

 

"i have those two freinds. they think we're really close and stuff but i think we're not.

there's so much stuff they don't know bout me.

i'm talking and talking and talking but they're not listening. i feel like i'm talking to a wall.

they don't understand me. not at all.

it might sound a little stupid but i think i'm a little more marute than they are. it's just like i'm worried bout loadsa things ... .

i made some painful experiences in my life and my so-called friends don't know about it. i don't wanna tell them cause everytime i'm talking bout something serious ... they're like"yeah, okay ...whatever ... what do we wanna do?!" and that drags me down. "

 

 

man. i hear you on this. they dont listen and ignore you. and even if they did listen, they wouldnt understand.

woooo time for X&Y, speed of sound, square one, talk.

"if you could see it then youd understand"

"you just want sombody listening to what you say, it doesnt matter who you are"

"is there anybody out there who is lost and hurt and lonely too, are they bleeding all your colors into one? and if you come undone as if youve been run throught some catapult, that fired you, you wonder if your chance will ever come, or if your stuck in square one"

"youll tell anyone wholl listen but you feel ignored, nothings really making any sence at all, lets talk, lets ta-a-a-alk".

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i really really love those lyrics off the x & y record ...

probably cause i know what chris martin felt when he wrote them ... :dozey:

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It's incredible how much you sound like me, Headless Chick. I would never tell my friends about anything I've written in this thread thus far, even. I just would be too uncomfortable. A lot of the interests I have I don't share with people of my own age group. My mom even says that I have the interests of a person in their 20s.

 

You're not alone, don't worry. I'm sure your friends might even feel this way themselves sometimes. It's half the reason why I'm on the internet so much as I am, I can just relate to people here more than I can in my "real life". I'm thankful for it.

 

Talking to my therapist has been excellent, she's given me so many helpful tips about changing my diet, excersize plan, and lots of things.

 

Don't worry, you have plenty of people to relate to and talk to here, and getting a diary or journal would be good.

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i already have a diary ... i quit writing entries a while ago though ... it was kinda weird. when i went through my older entries, i felt like a dork ... dunno i can't describe my feelings very well. :dozey:

 

i know that there are some people out there who might feel exactly the same.

 

the thing is, my friends are a little low sometimes too but the get up quicker than i do. things don't mean the same to them as they do to me.

when i talk to my "best" friend, she might be down for a second and in the next she is the happiest person in the world.

sometimes i ask myself, if she's just faking her happiness but it seems so real.

she's weird.

 

i wanna go to a therapist too but i think my parents won't pay one ... they think i'm a normal kid that's just in puberty ... +_+

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yeah, my "best friend" is the same way. she went through a depressive state when i met her last year, she couldnt handle moving so well. and like, now, shes completely different. always happy. preppy clothes, attitude, everything. weve almost switched personallities. i used to be like, super preppy, constantly smiling and bursting with energy. now, im like, quiet, calm, always tired, listening to music (i just picked it up last summer, its the onlything that really makes sence in my life anymore), depressed, like the way she was when i first met her. i think shes faking it too.

i dont want to see a therapist, just because... im very hidden about whats going on. i know it doesnt seem like it, but thats because this is like, over the internet, its harder for me to say what i mean when vocallizing it. its hard to explain.

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uhhhh

 

I've thought about killing myself a lot. 0_o

 

I keep thinking--if I died, nothing would change. Sure, my family and friends might miss me for a while, but in a decade or two I'll just be forgotten--just like every other person that's died in our family... this life sucks; why live it when yo u can just die...

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Suicide has been proven to be "contagious". When one person does it, it often sets off a chain reaction. You would NEVER be forgotten, please don't think that. Please. I'm telling you, it scares me to read this. Because I know how bad it is, honestly I do. I've been on both sides of the tracks here.

 

I think what suicide ties into a bit is the human perception of heaven, and death. No one knows what death is. What if this life is all we've got? What if there's nothing better? So what's the point of dying when you could have nothing when you die. it just doesn't make sense to me. And I've thought about it a lot.

 

 

I just can't say enough that suicide isn't worth it. It kills more than you. And a lot of times the thoughts saying that there's nothing here for you, there's no life worth living, it's NOT you. There's something wrong beyond what you can comprehend. Really.

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I know we're all afraid of the future and things like that... but we just have to live our lives and try to do the best... I thought about it like 2 years ago and that feels horrible... i know what it feels like and now I feel great because I did my best and I feel right, now...

 

 

and please think in your friends and family...

 

just that

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i guess i agree with everything you said....but it is really strange to think that we all think about it at some point...

 

edit: i guess hope is what keep us alive

 

well, we all get very depressed at some point in our lives ...

it's normal to think about throwing all away ...,isn't it?! :embarrased:

 

 

a member of my family comitted suicide a few year's ago, you can't imagine the pain you cause to the people you leave behind, i thought of it too but then my nephew did it and i thought... never... nobody may feel this pain because of me

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