sarah** Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 A man is driving down a road. A woman is driving down the same road from the opposite direction. As they pass each other, the woman leans out the window and yells "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out his window and yells, "BITCH!!" They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next curve, he crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ A man left work one Friday afternoon. Being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spent his entire paycheck. When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally, his wife stopped and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?" To which he replied, "That would be fine with me." Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. On Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh HoNEy Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarah** Posted July 9, 2003 Author Share Posted July 9, 2003 IF MEN GOT PREGNANT 1. Maternity leave would last two years....with full pay. 2. There would be a cure for stretch marks. 3. Natural childbirth would become obsolete. 4. Morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem. 5. All methods of birth control would be 100% effective. 6. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained. 7. Men would be eager to talk about commitment. 8. They wouldn't think twins were so cute. 9. Sons would have to be home from dates by 10:00 PM. 10. Briefcases would be used as diaper bags. 11. Paternity suits would be a fashion line of clothes. 12. They'd stay in bed during the entire pregnancy. 13. Restaurants would include ice cream and pickles as main entrees. 14. Women would rule the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh HoNEy Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 LOL@ bein home before 10pm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dionisio Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh HoNEy Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 um..what are YOU laughin at??? yyou have to be home from pimpin at 9pm SHARP :roll: :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hicksy Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dionisio Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 :lol: :lol: my fav song.... Uhh, uh uh uh It's big pimpin baby.. It's big pimpin, spendin G's Feel me.. uh-huh uhh, uh-huh.. Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah.. You know I - thug em, fuck em, love em, leave em Cause I don't fuckin need em Take em out the hood, keep em lookin good But I don't fuckin feed em First time they fuss I'm breezin Talkin bout, "What's the reasons?" I'm a pimp in every sense of the word, bitch Better trust than believe em In the cut where I keep em til I need a nut, til I need to beat the guts Then it's, beep beep and I'm pickin em up Let em play with the dick in the truck Many chicks wanna put Jigga fist in cuffs Divorce him and split his bucks Just because you got good head, I'ma break bread so you can be livin it up? Shit I.. parts with nothin, y'all be frontin Me give my heart to a woman? Not for nothin, never happen I'll be forever mackin Heart cold as assassins, I got no passion I got no patience And I hate waitin.. Hoe get yo' ass in And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah We doin.. big pimpin, we spendin G's Check em out now Big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B Yo yo yo.. big pimpin, spendin G's We doin - big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B Nigga it's the - big Southern rap impresario Comin straight up out the black bar-rio Makes a mill' up off a sorry hoe Then sit back and peep my sce-nawr-e-oh Oops, my bad, that's my scenario No I can't fuck a scary hoe Now every time, every place, everywhere we go Hoes start pointin - they say, "There he go!" Now these motherfuckers know we carry mo' heat than a little bit We don't pull it out over little shit And if you catch a lick when I spit, then it won't be a little hit Go read a book you illiterate son of a bitch and step up yo' vocab Don't be surprised if yo' hoe stab out with me and you see us comin down on yo' slab Livin ghetto-fabulous, so mad, you just can't take it But nigga if you hatin I then you wait while I get yo' bitch butt-naked, just break it You gotta pay like you weigh wet wit two pairs of clothes on Now get yo' ass to the back as I'm flyin to the track Timbaland let me spit my pro's on Pump it up in the pro-zone That's the track that we breakin these hoes on Ain't the track that we flow's on But when shit get hot, then the glock start poppin like ozone We keep hoes crunk like Trigger-man Fo' real it don't get no bigger man Don't trip, let's flip, gettin throwed on the flip Gettin blowed with the motherfuckin Jigga Man, fool We be.. big pimpin, spendin G's We be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s We be.. big pimpin down in P.A.T. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B Cause we be.. big pimpin, spendin G's And we be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s Cause we be.. big pimpin in P.A.T. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B.. nigga Uhh.. smokin out, throwin up, keepin lean up in my cup All my car got leather and wood, in my hood we call it buck Everybody wanna ball, holla at broads at the mall If he up, watch him fall, nigga I can't fuck witch'all If I wasn't rappin baby, I would still be ridin Mercedes Chromin shinin sippin daily, no rest until whitey pay me Uhhh, now what y'all know bout them Texas boys Comin down in candied toys, smokin weed and talkin noise :lol: :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victoria Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 Golly :shock: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manders Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 too long for moi. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reilly Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 Wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WAH uh uh wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WUHUHwah... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manders Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 interesting.... :shock: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cold_kitty Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 lol. i like the first joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh HoNEy Posted July 9, 2003 Share Posted July 9, 2003 whcih one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reilly Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 Wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WAH uh uh wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WUHUHwah... Thats the beat, by the way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh HoNEy Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dionisio Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 Wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WAH uh uh wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WUHUHwah... hey reilly i knew it!!!!!!!...first i was confuzzled but then i thought of it and yeah u r damn right...thats the exact beat!! u da man! :-D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guy'sChick Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 IF MEN GOT PREGNANT 1. Maternity leave would last two years....with full pay. 2. There would be a cure for stretch marks. 3. Natural childbirth would become obsolete. 4. Morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem. 5. All methods of birth control would be 100% effective. 6. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained. 7. Men would be eager to talk about commitment. 8. They wouldn't think twins were so cute. 9. Sons would have to be home from dates by 10:00 PM. 10. Briefcases would be used as diaper bags. 11. Paternity suits would be a fashion line of clothes. 12. They'd stay in bed during the entire pregnancy. 13. Restaurants would include ice cream and pickles as main entrees. 14. Women would rule the world. lol this is good!!!! :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reilly Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 Wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WAH uh uh wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WUHUHwah... hey reilly i knew it!!!!!!!...first i was confuzzled but then i thought of it and yeah u r damn right...thats the exact beat!! u da man! :-D Hahaha... Well youre not wrong ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manders Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 :shock: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dionisio Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarah** Posted July 14, 2003 Author Share Posted July 14, 2003 :lol: :lol: my fav song.... Uhh, uh uh uh It's big pimpin baby.. It's big pimpin, spendin G's Feel me.. uh-huh uhh, uh-huh.. Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah.. You know I - thug em, fuck em, love em, leave em Cause I don't fuckin need em Take em out the hood, keep em lookin good But I don't fuckin feed em First time they fuss I'm breezin Talkin bout, "What's the reasons?" I'm a pimp in every sense of the word, bitch Better trust than believe em In the cut where I keep em til I need a nut, til I need to beat the guts Then it's, beep beep and I'm pickin em up Let em play with the dick in the truck Many chicks wanna put Jigga fist in cuffs Divorce him and split his bucks Just because you got good head, I'ma break bread so you can be livin it up? Shit I.. parts with nothin, y'all be frontin Me give my heart to a woman? Not for nothin, never happen I'll be forever mackin Heart cold as assassins, I got no passion I got no patience And I hate waitin.. Hoe get yo' ass in And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah We doin.. big pimpin, we spendin G's Check em out now Big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B Yo yo yo.. big pimpin, spendin G's We doin - big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B Nigga it's the - big Southern rap impresario Comin straight up out the black bar-rio Makes a mill' up off a sorry hoe Then sit back and peep my sce-nawr-e-oh Oops, my bad, that's my scenario No I can't fuck a scary hoe Now every time, every place, everywhere we go Hoes start pointin - they say, "There he go!" Now these motherfuckers know we carry mo' heat than a little bit We don't pull it out over little shit And if you catch a lick when I spit, then it won't be a little hit Go read a book you illiterate son of a bitch and step up yo' vocab Don't be surprised if yo' hoe stab out with me and you see us comin down on yo' slab Livin ghetto-fabulous, so mad, you just can't take it But nigga if you hatin I then you wait while I get yo' bitch butt-naked, just break it You gotta pay like you weigh wet wit two pairs of clothes on Now get yo' ass to the back as I'm flyin to the track Timbaland let me spit my pro's on Pump it up in the pro-zone That's the track that we breakin these hoes on Ain't the track that we flow's on But when shit get hot, then the glock start poppin like ozone We keep hoes crunk like Trigger-man Fo' real it don't get no bigger man Don't trip, let's flip, gettin throwed on the flip Gettin blowed with the motherfuckin Jigga Man, fool We be.. big pimpin, spendin G's We be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s We be.. big pimpin down in P.A.T. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B Cause we be.. big pimpin, spendin G's And we be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s Cause we be.. big pimpin in P.A.T. It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B.. nigga Uhh.. smokin out, throwin up, keepin lean up in my cup All my car got leather and wood, in my hood we call it buck Everybody wanna ball, holla at broads at the mall If he up, watch him fall, nigga I can't fuck witch'all If I wasn't rappin baby, I would still be ridin Mercedes Chromin shinin sippin daily, no rest until whitey pay me Uhhh, now what y'all know bout them Texas boys Comin down in candied toys, smokin weed and talkin noise :lol: :lol: :lol: i never realized how bad the lyrics are :shock: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh HoNEy Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 hi sarah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manders Posted July 14, 2003 Share Posted July 14, 2003 OMG I WAS THINKING THE EXACTR SAME THING BEFORE I LOOKED AT YOUR POST.... :shock: that is weird..but yes those lyrics are provoking and gay-ass...hey its rap whatd ya expect :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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