Jump to content
🌙 COLDPLAY ANNOUNCE MOON MUSIC OUT OCTOBER 4TH 🎵

WOMEN VS. MEN


sarah**

Recommended Posts

A man is driving down a road. A woman is driving down the same road from the opposite direction. As they pass each other, the woman leans out the window and yells "PIG!!"

 

The man immediately leans out his window and yells, "BITCH!!"

 

They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next curve, he crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road.

 

------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

A man left work one Friday afternoon. Being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spent his entire paycheck.

 

When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.

 

Finally, his wife stopped and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?" To which he replied, "That would be fine with me."

 

Monday went by and he didn't see his wife.

 

Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.

 

On Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.

 

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Link to comment
Share on other sites

IF MEN GOT PREGNANT

 

1. Maternity leave would last two years....with full pay.

 

2. There would be a cure for stretch marks.

 

3. Natural childbirth would become obsolete.

 

4. Morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem.

 

5. All methods of birth control would be 100% effective.

 

6. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained.

 

7. Men would be eager to talk about commitment.

 

8. They wouldn't think twins were so cute.

 

9. Sons would have to be home from dates by 10:00 PM.

 

10. Briefcases would be used as diaper bags.

 

11. Paternity suits would be a fashion line of clothes.

 

12. They'd stay in bed during the entire pregnancy.

 

13. Restaurants would include ice cream and pickles as main entrees.

 

14. Women would rule the world.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:lol: :lol: my fav song....

 

Uhh, uh uh uh

It's big pimpin baby..

It's big pimpin, spendin G's

Feel me.. uh-huh uhh, uh-huh..

Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah

Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah..

 

You know I - thug em, fuck em, love em, leave em

Cause I don't fuckin need em

Take em out the hood, keep em lookin good

But I don't fuckin feed em

First time they fuss I'm breezin

Talkin bout, "What's the reasons?"

I'm a pimp in every sense of the word, bitch

Better trust than believe em

In the cut where I keep em

til I need a nut, til I need to beat the guts

Then it's, beep beep and I'm pickin em up

Let em play with the dick in the truck

Many chicks wanna put Jigga fist in cuffs

Divorce him and split his bucks

Just because you got good head, I'ma break bread

so you can be livin it up? Shit I..

parts with nothin, y'all be frontin

Me give my heart to a woman?

Not for nothin, never happen

I'll be forever mackin

Heart cold as assassins, I got no passion

I got no patience

And I hate waitin..

Hoe get yo' ass in

And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now

RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah

And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now

RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah

 

We doin.. big pimpin, we spendin G's

Check em out now

Big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B

Yo yo yo.. big pimpin, spendin G's

We doin - big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B

 

Nigga it's the - big Southern rap impresario

Comin straight up out the black bar-rio

Makes a mill' up off a sorry hoe

Then sit back and peep my sce-nawr-e-oh

Oops, my bad, that's my scenario

No I can't fuck a scary hoe

Now every time, every place, everywhere we go

Hoes start pointin - they say, "There he go!"

Now these motherfuckers know we carry mo' heat than a little bit

We don't pull it out over little shit

And if you catch a lick when I spit, then it won't be a little hit

Go read a book you illiterate son of a bitch and step up yo' vocab

Don't be surprised if yo' hoe stab out with me

and you see us comin down on yo' slab

Livin ghetto-fabulous, so mad, you just can't take it

But nigga if you hatin I

then you wait while I get yo' bitch butt-naked, just break it

You gotta pay like you weigh wet wit two pairs of clothes on

Now get yo' ass to the back as I'm flyin to the track

Timbaland let me spit my pro's on

Pump it up in the pro-zone

That's the track that we breakin these hoes on

Ain't the track that we flow's on

But when shit get hot, then the glock start poppin like ozone

We keep hoes crunk like Trigger-man

Fo' real it don't get no bigger man

Don't trip, let's flip, gettin throwed on the flip

Gettin blowed with the motherfuckin Jigga Man, fool

 

We be.. big pimpin, spendin G's

We be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

We be.. big pimpin down in P.A.T.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B

Cause we be.. big pimpin, spendin G's

And we be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

Cause we be.. big pimpin in P.A.T.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B.. nigga

 

Uhh.. smokin out, throwin up, keepin lean up in my cup

All my car got leather and wood, in my hood we call it buck

Everybody wanna ball, holla at broads at the mall

If he up, watch him fall, nigga I can't fuck witch'all

If I wasn't rappin baby, I would still be ridin Mercedes

Chromin shinin sippin daily, no rest until whitey pay me

Uhhh, now what y'all know bout them Texas boys

Comin down in candied toys, smokin weed and talkin noise

 

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WAH uh uh wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WUHUHwah...

hey reilly i knew it!!!!!!!...first i was confuzzled but then i thought of it and yeah u r damn right...thats the exact beat!! u da man! :-D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

IF MEN GOT PREGNANT

 

1. Maternity leave would last two years....with full pay.

 

2. There would be a cure for stretch marks.

 

3. Natural childbirth would become obsolete.

 

4. Morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem.

 

5. All methods of birth control would be 100% effective.

 

6. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained.

 

7. Men would be eager to talk about commitment.

 

8. They wouldn't think twins were so cute.

 

9. Sons would have to be home from dates by 10:00 PM.

 

10. Briefcases would be used as diaper bags.

 

11. Paternity suits would be a fashion line of clothes.

 

12. They'd stay in bed during the entire pregnancy.

 

13. Restaurants would include ice cream and pickles as main entrees.

 

14. Women would rule the world.

 

 

lol this is good!!!! :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WAH uh uh wah wah wah wah... Wah wah wah WUHUHwah...

hey reilly i knew it!!!!!!!...first i was confuzzled but then i thought of it and yeah u r damn right...thats the exact beat!! u da man! :-D

 

Hahaha... Well youre not wrong ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:lol: :lol: my fav song....

 

Uhh, uh uh uh

It's big pimpin baby..

It's big pimpin, spendin G's

Feel me.. uh-huh uhh, uh-huh..

Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah

Ge-ge-geyeah, geyeah..

 

You know I - thug em, fuck em, love em, leave em

Cause I don't fuckin need em

Take em out the hood, keep em lookin good

But I don't fuckin feed em

First time they fuss I'm breezin

Talkin bout, "What's the reasons?"

I'm a pimp in every sense of the word, bitch

Better trust than believe em

In the cut where I keep em

til I need a nut, til I need to beat the guts

Then it's, beep beep and I'm pickin em up

Let em play with the dick in the truck

Many chicks wanna put Jigga fist in cuffs

Divorce him and split his bucks

Just because you got good head, I'ma break bread

so you can be livin it up? Shit I..

parts with nothin, y'all be frontin

Me give my heart to a woman?

Not for nothin, never happen

I'll be forever mackin

Heart cold as assassins, I got no passion

I got no patience

And I hate waitin..

Hoe get yo' ass in

And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now

RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah

And let's RI-I-I-I-I-IDE.. check em out now

RI-I-I-I-I-IDE, yeah

 

We doin.. big pimpin, we spendin G's

Check em out now

Big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B

Yo yo yo.. big pimpin, spendin G's

We doin - big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

We doin.. big pimpin up in N.Y.C.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B

 

Nigga it's the - big Southern rap impresario

Comin straight up out the black bar-rio

Makes a mill' up off a sorry hoe

Then sit back and peep my sce-nawr-e-oh

Oops, my bad, that's my scenario

No I can't fuck a scary hoe

Now every time, every place, everywhere we go

Hoes start pointin - they say, "There he go!"

Now these motherfuckers know we carry mo' heat than a little bit

We don't pull it out over little shit

And if you catch a lick when I spit, then it won't be a little hit

Go read a book you illiterate son of a bitch and step up yo' vocab

Don't be surprised if yo' hoe stab out with me

and you see us comin down on yo' slab

Livin ghetto-fabulous, so mad, you just can't take it

But nigga if you hatin I

then you wait while I get yo' bitch butt-naked, just break it

You gotta pay like you weigh wet wit two pairs of clothes on

Now get yo' ass to the back as I'm flyin to the track

Timbaland let me spit my pro's on

Pump it up in the pro-zone

That's the track that we breakin these hoes on

Ain't the track that we flow's on

But when shit get hot, then the glock start poppin like ozone

We keep hoes crunk like Trigger-man

Fo' real it don't get no bigger man

Don't trip, let's flip, gettin throwed on the flip

Gettin blowed with the motherfuckin Jigga Man, fool

 

We be.. big pimpin, spendin G's

We be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

We be.. big pimpin down in P.A.T.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B

Cause we be.. big pimpin, spendin G's

And we be.. big pimpin, on B.L.A.D.'s

Cause we be.. big pimpin in P.A.T.

It's just that Jigga Man, Pimp C, and B-U-N B.. nigga

 

Uhh.. smokin out, throwin up, keepin lean up in my cup

All my car got leather and wood, in my hood we call it buck

Everybody wanna ball, holla at broads at the mall

If he up, watch him fall, nigga I can't fuck witch'all

If I wasn't rappin baby, I would still be ridin Mercedes

Chromin shinin sippin daily, no rest until whitey pay me

Uhhh, now what y'all know bout them Texas boys

Comin down in candied toys, smokin weed and talkin noise

 

:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

i never realized how bad the lyrics are :shock:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


×
×
  • Create New...