Mirrorball

Chapter 2

 

 

 

Some hours later, the results of the MRI came in. This was always where the skills of Jonny's profession were truly used to the fullest. A nurse knocked on his office door, and handed him the scans. He thanked her, and began to take a look at them. After only a few moments, he pinpointed the problem, and frowned. It appeared that Christopher had suffered a concussion. It wasn't as major as he had thought it would be, but it was still serious.

 

He made his way to Christopher's room to deliver the news to him. But he arrived there to find a room without a bed. A nurse was busy hooking up a heart monitoring device to the wall.

 

"Excuse me, where is the patient? I have to tell him about the results of his MRI."

 

"Oh, he is just getting some x-rays."

 

"X-rays?" Jonny found himself oddly worried about that.

 

"Yes, it looked as though he may have had a broken arm. He should be back soon."

 

"Okay." Jonny waited in the room feeling awkward, even though he had no reason to feel that way.

 

After a few minutes a couple of nurses wheeled the bed, with Christopher in it, back into the room. Christopher noticed Jonny right away and tried to smile at him again. Jonny wanted to tell him to stop, that he was going to hurt himself. He wanted to tell him to feel sorry for himself, like a normal person would. Instead he gave a small smile in return. He grabbed a chair and pulled it beside the bed. Sitting down, he began explaining the situation.

 

"I got the results back from your MRI, and it appears as though you have a concussion. It is not very serious, but it is not a mild one either. We will need to keep you here for at least three nights to monitor you."

 

"Okay," Christopher replied agreeably. He showed no signs of irritation or non compliance. He seemed to have no problems accepting the consequences of his actions. Jonny was stunned. This man was dodging every stereotype Jonny had formed about people in all his years as a doctor. Although ruffled considerably by Christopher's strange demeanor, Jonny did his best to continue the explanation.

 

"The first night will probably be the most difficult for you. You will not be allowed to sleep at all. If you were to fall asleep, there is a possibility that you could slip into a coma, so it is very important that you stay awake. A nurse will be in the room at all times to ensure that you stay conscious. And....we'll see how it goes from there."

 

Jonny noticed Christopher's good eye enlarge in a manner that expressed sadness. He thought this crazy man was finally about to have a normal reaction to this less than ideal news. It wasn't anger, but at least it was something. Or it would have been, had Jonny not been incorrect in judging him once again.

 

"I'm sorry," Christopher said quietly. "I have caused you and the other staff members so much trouble with my clumsiness." Jonny couldn't even fathom a reply to that. He thought this had to be some kind of joke or something. He searched for a trace of laughter in Christopher's eye. But all he found was regret.

 

"You're....sorry?" he mumbled these words so incoherently that he was sure that Christopher had not heard him. But he must have, because he nodded in reply, an act which was not the wisest one to perform. He immediately flinched with pain.

 

Jonny frowned with concern. "That reminds me. We have you on only mild pain killers right now. In these early stages after your injury, we cannot risk giving you anything stronger. So I am sorry, but you are going to be in a lot of pain for a while."

 

"That's okay. I deserve it anyways, for being so clumsy."

 

Jonny stared at him incredulously. He felt like telling Christopher that he was being completely ridiculous, that a man as decent and kind as he did not deserve anything but happiness. He had no idea where that was coming from, because he didn't even know this man. Instead, he said "Christopher, you seem like a nice guy, even if you are clumsy. You don't deserve anything like that."

 

"Just call me Chris, doctor," he replied, ignoring the rest of what Jonny had said.

"Chris then." He looked at him for a few moments. "I hope you feel better soon," he said quietly and then left the room. Once outside in the bustling hallway, he had an urge to slap himself a couple of times in the face, to ensure that he was still sane.

 

Never in all his years as a doctor had he told a patient he hoped they would feel better soon. It wasn't that he didn't hope that. It was more along the lines that he couldn't say it, because it might give the patient false hope. Either that or it might make them become hopeless; hearing a doctor use a word like "hope" instead of "I know" or "of course".

 

But now he had said it. And he was beginning to question what was going on in his head. Especially because he was beginning to form an ever increasing desire to walk right back into Chris's room and sit down in that chair and just stay there with him. He wanted to sit there and just look at him. And maybe pick his brain a bit.

 

He looked down at his watch. Three o'clock. Past lunch time. No wonder he was acting so oddly. He decided to go down to the cafeteria. He had some spare time on his hands, a rarity when working as a doctor. Surely he could clear his head after a good meal.

 

 

Parks and Recreation

 

 

Part 1-Parks

 

 

 

Spring fever was running rampant throughout the body and soul of every human being in my little town. Everyone was affected by it. All the retired folks were lounging on their porches, sipping lemonade and chatting amiably. Homeowners everywhere were proudly mowing their lawns for the first time that year. Happy gardeners were tending to their prized gardens, trimming bushes and pulling weeds. And I could already smell the first of the year's barbeques.

 

But no one here was ever more affected by the changing seasons than the children. Kids of all ages relished the chance to enjoy everything that spring had to offer them. Toddlers giddily stomped around in the freshly cut front lawns of their parents. Elementary school children rode around on bicycles and skateboards. Some young teens on my block organized teams and played rugby in the street, as they do every year.

 

And me? Well, I didn't really enjoy any of that stuff. But I loved to be outside all the same. As soon as I caught that first whiff of springtime air I had to surround myself in it. I've always hated being cooped up indoors. Fresh air was my best friend. Well, fresh air and Jonny. Thus Jonny was the unfortunate soul I dragged along with me after school hours on the first warm day in months.

 

"Where are we going?" he asked with mock annoyance.

 

I grinned rather widely in his direction. "The park, obviously."

 

He rolled his eyes. "I should've known."

 

Yes it's true, I was a sixteen year old boy who loved nothing better on a spring day than to visit the park. Jonny always told me I was like a giant five year old. I can't say I disagree with him. I loved the park more than any other place. I felt kind of bad dragging Jonny along with me. But I really needed this today. School had been rough.

 

It had started off quite well. I found out that I had gotten the lead role in our school's musical. Apparently Jonny wasn't lying when he told me I was a great singer, although I still wouldn't go so far as to say I was great. But I was good enough for my school, and that filled me with joy.

 

I was elated. No one could bring me down. Well, until some gang of senior guys did, literally. They saw me in the hallway, merrily humming a little tune as I walked to class. They surrounded me with surprising speed and knocked my books onto the ground, shortly followed by me. The warning bell rang and they scurried away, laughing.

 

I tried hard not to cry, but I was really hurting. My knee had made contact with the floor, hard, and left it bruised and swollen. I couldn't keep a few tears from sliding down my cheeks. I suppose I should've known this would happen. I was accustomed to being bullied at school. Jonny always told me that he wished I had never admitted being gay, because he couldn't stand to see me getting abused this way. But I wanted people to know. Even if it meant getting beat up on a near daily basis.

 

But boy was I lucky to have Jonny. That time, like so many other times before, he helped me up and gave me some comforting words, and I forgot all about my injury. They were always along the lines of how I was better than they were and that they were just jealous. It was all so ridiculous, but it made me feel better. Without him I don't know how I would have survived a single school day.

 

I think my bad experience that day was a large part of the reason that Jonny agreed to accompany me on my crazy park visit. We walked side by side, not saying a word. With us it wasn't always necessary to communicate verbally. Some things we just knew, like our mutual desire to silently enjoy the lovely weather. I felt the warm sun on my face and the gentle breeze on my skin. In what felt like no time at all, we had walked the up the path that lead to the quaint little park.

 

It was quiet and secluded. All around us were trees with brand new leaves, freshly cut grass, and flowers. But I set my sights immediately on the swings, my absolute favorite thing there.

 

"Race you!" I shouted playfully at Jonny. I saw him roll his eyes again, but he nodded and after my five second countdown we were off. I won easily as I had always been an excellent runner. I had already made myself comfortable on a swing by the time Jonny caught up, breathing heavily.

 

"Chris," he gasped, "your energy level astounds me." I just grinned and began to pump my legs. Jonny hopped on the swing beside me and did the same, although much slower. Jonny had always been a more laid back person than me. I was just a big ball of hyperactive energy. And swinging was an excellent way to get it out.

 

Soon I was flying high above the ground, stretching my feet up towards the clouds, only to be whisked back down by gravity moments later. Pathetic as it sounds, this was a real thrill for me. I loved the feel of the wind on my face and the pull of my muscles as I exercised them further and further. Sometimes I would close my eyes and lean my head back so that my curls nearly grazed the ground below.

 

This would really freak Jonny out. His eyes would widen and he would beg me to stop. I would just laugh. Jonny acted like a doting parent towards me. He was so cautious. I guess that made us perfect for each other; one man careless and the other careful.

 

A perfect example of our contrasting personalities was later on that day, when off in the distance I saw the same group of guys that had pushed me down earlier. I called out to them, stupidly. I mocked them and called them names, shouting insulting things to the heavens. Jonny tried to shut me up, but I was on top of the world.

 

In one dramatic motion I jumped off of the swing and landed with a graceful thud on the dirt below. I waved my arms wildly and beckoned to the guys, daring them to come over. I should probably take this opportunity to point out that I do really, really brainless things-a lot. I must really stress Jonny out with all of my ridiculous antics.

 

On that day I could see how anxious he looked. His brow was creased into a deeply worried line that stretched across his forehead. He finally managed to convince me to shut my big mouth, but by then it was already too late. The guys were already approaching us. I suddenly began to sweat. I didn't' feel so cool anymore, that's for sure.

 

 

 

 

 

Far From Easy

 

 

 

Chris tried his hardest not to blink. It was a difficult task, completely impossible to accomplish, but he tried anyway. He didn't want to miss anything.

Jonny was sound asleep, laying on his back with his head turned to Chris. He had convinced Chris to stay with him for the night- though Chris hardly needed convincing- but had discovered in time that he was far more tired that he'd estimated, and fell asleep quicker than he'd anticipated. There wasn't really much to miss.

 

Chris scooted over closer to Jonny. For the first time in as long as he could remember, he was actually tired enough to fall asleep. Using Jonny's shoulder as a pillow, Chris closed his eyes and laid motionless, letting the rhythmic motion of Jonny's chest steadily moving up and down as he breathed drift him off into unconsciousness.

 

Jonny woke up a few hours later as the sun began to rise. He rapidly blinked for a few seconds before his eyes adjusted to the light. He was a little surprised, but wholly delighted to discover Chris sleeping beside him.

Chris was on his side, his back turned against Jonny. Jonny took no offense to this, though, as he just assumed that Chris had tossed in his sleep.

Jonny moved and pressed his chest against Chris's back, then wrapped his arm around Chris's abdomen. He laid his head down on the pillow, and as he tried to go back to sleep he was overcome with intensely delightful scent of Chris's hair.

Chris could feel Jonny's arm wrapped around him even in his sleep. He felt himself smiling, then realized that he was slowly coming back to reality.

 

Then the feel of Jonny's warm body laying beside him disappeared, and a wave of cold air rushed over him. He shivered as he pulled the blankets up over his shoulder and readjusted his position.

 

Chris's eyes flew open as he remembered what just happened. His heart began to race as he quickly sat up and looked at the other side of the bed.

 

It was empty, like he expected it to be, but flashes of Jonny laying beside him riddled his mind. He looked down at his own hands, then, grabbing at the collar of his shirt, he started to feel really uncomfortable.

 

He tried so many times to get rid of these thoughts. First he tried eating breakfast, thinking that maybe his odd behavior was the cause of hunger, but all he could think about was how much Jonny loved wheat toast with grape jam. He thought maybe watching TV would distract him, but the first thing that came on when he turned on the set was Pirates of the Caribbean.

 

Then he tried taking a shower, but that only put him in the position where he was naked and thinking about Jonny, which made him the most uncomfortable of all.

 

In a desperate attempt to rid himself of any fault, he ran to his computer and looked up as much as he could about dreams. He hoped endlessly that maybe just because he'd had one weird dream didn't mean that suddenly his entire world had changed. But he found no comfort in what came up as a result.

 

He sat back down on the sofa and wondered how normal it was to have such vivid dreams about your best friend... and being in love with him. That was the part that Chris couldn't wrap his mind around. As far as he could recall, he'd never felt that way about Jonny while he was awake.

 

Suddenly an alarm went off in another room. Chris started at the unexpected noise, and he quickly remembered that the alarm was set to remind him that it was time to practice with the rest of the band.

 

He considered faking sick to get out of it. As much as his dream-self would have loved it, he really didn't want to be around Jonny at the moment. His morning so far spent in solitude had already been far from easy.

 

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(This is for Dianna!)

 

 

5.

“Wait?” Jonny asked loudly. “Wait?!” He stood up and paced. “I’m not going to sit around and wait! He’s unconscious for crying out loud!”

 

“I know that, Jonny.” Dianna answered, trying to keep her cool. “I can’t do anymore than I’ve already done. I don’t have healing powers.”

 

“I’m getting Will.”

 

“Like he has healing powers?”

 

“No. But maybe he knows what to do.” He answered and took one last look at Chris.

“Could you please clean the blood from his face… I can't bear to see him like this.”

 

“Sure.” Dianna answered quietly as he turned around and went out the door.

 

Jonny made his way through the crowd outside the room, ignoring the inquiries about Chris’ wellbeing.

 

He briskly walked through the empty corridors of the underground backstage area, trying to keep a clear head and not fall into a deep pit of despair.

 

He tripped over something and caught his balance just in time to avoid a painful fall.

Only, it wasn’t something that he tripped over. It was someone.

 

He frowned as the girl on the floor peeked up at him, tears clinging to her eyelashes.

“I’m so sorry!” She sobbed. “Are you alright?”

 

“You’re human.” He said.

 

“Yes…?”

 

“How did you get in?”

 

“I don’t know!” She exclaimed. “I was going through the forest and there was this big stone wall and there was a set of doors and…” She sobbed again. “I don’t know!”

 

Jonny didn’t know what to do with a crying female. A human female at that, so he held out his hand.

 

“I think you better come with me.” She took his hand and stood up on shaky legs. “I’m Jonny.”

 

“Thalia.” She sniffed.

 

“Nice to meet you.” He nodded down a corridor. “It’s right this way.”

 

“Where are you taking me?” Thalia asked as she followed the man. She felt scared despite the friendly aura that surrounded Jonny.

 

“We’re going to see the boss.”

 

“The boss?”

 

“Will Champion.”

 

“And you… work for this man?”

 

“We’re all working for Will Champion. It’s how it’s always been and how it’s always gonna be.”

 

Jonny stopped. “Ah, here we are.” He knocked on the black door. “Maybe you should wait here until I’ve had a few words with him.” Thalia nodded in agreement and stood off to the side.

A muffled ‘come in’ was heard through the thick door and Jonny pushed it open.

 

“Will?”

 

“Hey, Jon!” Will answered happily as he recognized the man in the doorway. “How did the show go tonight?”

 

“That’s just it…” He bit his lip. “Can I sit down?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

Will’s office was painted a dark blue. It was calm and tranquil. Jonny tiredly sat down in a chair in front of Will’s desk.

 

“So, tell me.” Will looked worried.

 

“It’s Chris.” Jonny said and tried to hold back a sob.

 

Will’s eyes widened. “What about him?”

 

“The mask… It stuck on his face and it hurt him really bad…” He took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. “Dianna had to pour some sort of liquid on it to…”

 

“Burn the threads.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“How is he now?”

 

“Unconscious.”

 

“Alright, I need to see him.” Will said and got up from his chair.

 

“Will, wait!” Jonny exclaimed.

 

Will stopped. “What?”

 

“We have another problem.”

 

“Apart from the star of the show being unconscious and the mask going haywire?”

 

“Yeah, sorry… Ehm, it seems like a human has gotten into the theatre.”

 

“What?!” Will was furious. “How did that happen?”

 

“I have no idea! I literarily stumbled upon her in the corridor!” He sighed. “I’ll take her to the spare room.”

 

Will took a deep breath. “Please do. I’ll have to deal with that later. Chris is first priority. Where is he now?”

 

“In his dressing room with Dianna and Guy.”

 

Will shook his head. “Those two seriously need to get together already.”

 

Jonny laughed despite the seriousness of the situation.

 

“You’re right about that.”

 

-*-

 

Dianna gently wiped the blood of off Chris’ cheek. Her hand shook.

 

“Please.” Guy said as he noticed her tremors and put his hand on top of hers. “Let me.”

 

Dianna sighed and extracted her hand from under Guy’s.

 

“Thank you.” She sighed.

 

“I…” Guy began. “I’m really proud of what you did here tonight, Di.”

 

She blushed.

 

“You are?”

 

“Of course, I never could’ve done something like that.”

 

She smiled a little. Guy finished wiping the blood of off Chris and he tucked a blond curl behind his ear.

 

“I’m scared.” Dianna said after a moment of silence.

 

Guy turned to her and fell down to his knees next to her. He boldly cupped her face.

 

“You have nothing to be afraid of.” He fiercely declared.

 

Her breath caught in her throat.

 

“I’ll be there for you, no matter what.” Guy continued and gently caressed her cheek with his thumb.

 

Her eyes fluttered shut.

 

“We’ll get through this.” He whispered, his mouth close to hers.

 

The door slammed open and Guy guiltily jumped back, his hands leaving her face. Dianna opened her eyes.

 

“Will!”

 

“How is he?” He said ignoring the moment he had walked in upon. He crouched down in the spot that Guy had just vacated and looked Chris over.

 

“I have no idea.” Dianna admitted. “I never knew the repercussions of the mask's safety unlock.”

 

“Well… We did hope we would never have to use it.” Will thoughtfully mumbled. He sighed. “Can I see the mask?”

 

Dianna nodded and got up and got the mask from a nearby table. It was freezing cold.

 

“Here.”

 

Will turned it over in his hands.

“I was afraid of this.”

 

“What?” Dianna asked.

 

“We have to go and get this repaired. Otherwise he’ll never be able to see again.” He looked over at the unconscious man on the sofa. “And somehow I think that would be the end of him.”

 

 

Parks and Recreation

 

 

Part 2-Recreation

 

 

Oh, and there is some actual slash in this part, so....be warned:P

 

 

Soon the biggest of them was right in front of me. He grinned nastily.

 

"Oh look, the little girlie wants to play." The other guys snickered. "Well okay, Chrissy. Let's have ourselves little fun, shall we?"

 

He raised his fist and I braced myself for the blow. But it didn't come. I cautiously opened my eyes and was shocked by what I saw. The guy had been forced backwards on his feet and into his friends when his face came into contact with a fist. Jonny's fist. Bleeding from his upper lip, he shot us looks of pure hatred. We looked at each other and our eyes said the same thing. "Run!" they cried, and we ran.

 

I got ahead of them quickly, but Jonny was much slower and soon the gang was catching up with him. In a panic I ran back to Jonny and tried to pull him along. But it was too late. They had surrounded us. The main guy didn't waste any time. He raised a fist towards Jonny.

 

"No!" I cried, and jumped in between the two of them. I had some sort of strange delusion that this would make them go away and leave us alone. What happened instead was me receiving a fist square in the face. It was so forceful that I fell back and landed on the ground in the dirt and the mud. Moments later Jonny was sprawled beside me, having met the same fate.

 

Then the guys left, cackling like hyenas and high fiving each other. We had mud all over us. Both of our faces sported red marks that were quickly darkening into bruises. Slowly we turned to look at each other, bruised and lying in the mud, and we began to laugh.

 

We laughed and laughed, and soon our laughter turned hysterical. We laughed until we cried and until our sides ached with the effort. Then we just lay there, the sun warming our bruised faces and drying the mud on our bodies. Again we turned to look at each other.

 

I am not sure what came over me then. I had never been attracted to Jonny before. But at that moment the green of the surrounding foliage was nothing compared to the green of his eyes. And I don't know, maybe it was the injury keeping me from thinking clearly, or maybe it was the warm weather that was making me loopy, but I leaned in and kissed him passionately on the lips.

 

He didn't respond negatively. He didn't pull back, or even hesitate. And maybe it was his own bruised face, or the nice weather, but he wrapped his arms around my neck and forcefully kissed me back. It could have been a number of things, but whatever it was, it was empowering.

 

Our kiss stretched out to fill seemingly endless lengths of time. All the while we grew more forceful and more passionate. Our tongues intertwined. Jonny let out a soft moan, and I pushed myself onto him, so that I was on top of him completely. Still there was no protest. I took that as a green light, a go ahead signal.

 

Still kissing him, I slowly began to unbutton his shirt. I was glad he had worn this shirt today, and not some regular t-shirt, or I might have had to stop kissing him to remove it. And that was the last thing I wanted to do. The shirt was off now; I had thrown it into the mud. I slid my hands down his sides and he shivered. I began to move my lips down from his mouth to his neck, and finally down to his chest, stomach, and abdomen.

 

I grabbed at the button on his pants. He grabbed my hand. "Wait," he gasped. He reached out and unbuttoned my own shirt, throwing it casually to the side.

 

"I want to know how you feel too," he whispered. He gently skimmed my chest, stomach, and sides with his fingertips.

 

I shivered with pleasure and then could wait no longer. I forcefully grabbed at his pants. It began to rain. It was to be expected. It was England, after all. The precipitation didn't stop us though. The increasing mud made it easy for me to strip Jonny of his jeans. The motion also caused him to slide closer to me. He grabbed at my own pants, and soon we were pressed close to each other, only our undergarments between us.

 

"Are you sure you want to do this, out in public and everything?" Jonny asked.

 

The rain answered his question by suddenly coming down much harder. We could hardly see each other's faces, with the already dimming light of the evening made even less by the sudden downpour. To anyone else around we were invisble.

 

"Yes," I replied and immediately reached down to remove the last bit of clothing from Jonny. Jonny followed suit immediately.

 

"I want this," I whispered in his ear.

 

"I need this," he whispered back. And then we were rolling around with each other, completely naked, yet clothed in mud. The rain soaked my hair and it hung down in my face. Jonny brushed it aside and pinned me down with a kiss.

 

I don't know just how or why, but on that evening we not only wanted to have each other, we needed to have each other, in this way and every way. Maybe it was hormones, maybe it was the fever. The spring fever. I'm sure if anyone else had known about our actions that time in the park, they would all have their thoughts, their speculations.

 

I've got my money on the fever. In fact, I think I've still got it to this day because ever since then, whenever I look at Jonny I feel things I never thought I would feel. Yes, I believe on that night I caught the spring fever. And over the years I've learned something. This kind of fever isn't something that goes away after a few hours or a few days. No, this fever burns forever in your heart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Far From Easy

 

 

“I don't see why it's my responsibility to talk to him.”

 

“Because, he likes you the most out of us. He trusts you.”

 

“Yeah, Jon. Please do this? We really need Chris to focus.”

 

Jonny sighed and looked down at his guitar. Guy and Will were right; Chris never seemed to open up as much to anyone else as he did to Jonny. But Jonny had recently been feeling differently about his friendship with Chris, though he wasn't exactly sure what his feelings were now. They were just different than before.

 

“Fine,” he eventually agreed, then walked back into the small room where Chris was lightly playing the piano to himself.

 

When Jonny walked by, Chris looked up and his mind raced. Suddenly, they were back in the hotel room, bodies pressed together, lips locked, and Jonny's hands raking through Chris's thick curls. Then Chris snapped himself back to the present, twitching uneasily as he did so.

 

“Chris, what's up with you? Are you feeling OK?”

 

“I'm feeling fine,” Chris quickly and unconvincingly replied. “Are you guys done with your break so we can get back to playing?”

 

“We can get back to playing when you stop acting so weird,” Jonny said.

 

“I'm fine, I promise,” Chris droned. “Can we please get back to playing?”

 

Jonny stared at Chris. He knew Chris was lying. It wasn't difficult to see. “I'll go get the other guys,” Jonny quietly said.

 

Within a few minutes the four were gathered in the same room, readying themselves to start their song. Chris counted off the beat, then the room burst with melodic explosions. They all sounded absolutely fantastic, despite Chris's inability to keep his focus on the piano in front of him. Every few seconds he would look up at Jonny, and remember what it had felt like to have those hands run over him like they did the frets of Jonny's precious guitar. Or, at least, what he thought it would feel like. And he was wrought with confliction; he mostly wanted these weird images to disappear, but a small part of him wished to experience that touch once more.

 

It was only that it had felt so nice. To have such strong arms wrapped around him, gently holding him- and the feel of warm breath grazing the back of his neck... it could have been anyone.

 

He was just lonely, quite often. The night air never did much to comfort him, not when it was busy filling up the empty space in his bed.

 

Before he knew it, practice was over and Jonny and Will had left. Guy was still in the room, though he was packing up. But Chris decided to take the opportunity to ask Guy for some advice.

 

“Guy, I need your help with something,” Chris said from across the room. Guy paused and looked up.

 

“With what?”

 

“Well...” Chris slowly got up and walked over to Guy. He hesitated to continue, but knew that it was for the best if he did. “You're pretty... knowledgeable in the area of... relationships, right?”

 

“I guess. Why?”

 

“Have you ever had a sex dream? Like, about someone you're friends with?”

 

“Once or twice, yeah.” Guy tilted his head and examined Chris throw narrowed eyes. “Is that why you've been so strange today?”

 

“Kinda,” Chris quietly answered. “I mean, I don't remember there being any sex in the dream, so it wasn't an actual sex dream, but... it was a dream that I wouldn't have expected to have, anyway.”

 

“It probably doesn't mean anything. Unless it was, like, Jonny or something-”

 

“Why would you say that?” Chris immediately asked. “Why Jonny?”

 

Chris was hoping for an answer, but the expression on Guy's face merely told that Guy had found an answer of his own.

 

“In that case, you better watch yourself,” Guy said. “Because I'd be OK with there being something between you two, but if anything goes wrong and it affects the band... well, I certainly can't say that pleasant things would happen afterward.”

 

“So the dream wasn't just a weird dream? You think I...” Chris sighed, his voice breaking with disintegrated hope. “I have feelings for Jonny...”

 

“It wouldn't surprise me, no. I kinda thought you did, actually. And so did Will.” Guy placed a hand on Chris's shoulder and locked their eyes together. “But if you're not sure, then maybe you don't. I mean, I think you'd know if you had feelings for him.”

 

Chris soaked in Guy's words, and replayed them over and over until they were far too processed into his mind. And he remembered the flashes of dream that had cluttered his focus since he woke up. And the way he felt when he remembered them, and how he tried just a little to pretend that he was Jonny's guitar, that they were both alone in that hotel room again...

 

And he knew he had feelings for Jonny.

 

 

Mirrorball

Chapter 3

 

 

 

Ten minutes later Jonny felt his beeper go off. He threw out his half eaten bag of chips and dashed to the ER. There would be no lunch break today. The chaos was evident as soon as he entered the area. Nurses and doctors ran around frantically. Among the crazy mass of people Jonny pinpointed the one other person besides Chris who he found at all interesting at the moment.

 

Will was busy giving some scared looking people checkups. He was a cardiologist, but like Jonny did he not mind lending a hand once in a while, even though trauma was not his field at all. The people looked a bit banged up, they sported some nice bruises and some were a bit bloody. But their injuries didn’t look too severe.

 

However, there was another group who looked to be in much worse condition. After a quick update on the situation from Will, Jonny hurried over to the group that was in poor shape. Apparently there had been an accident a few miles down the road, and a small bus had turned over sideways. The people lying before him were the passengers, clearly.

 

“All of them are going to need MRIs,” he said immediately. “We can’t take any risks with accidents like this.”

 

The nurses within earshot nodded and soon patient after patient was whisked away for head scans. Looking around, Jonny decided that there was nothing left for him to do here. He thought about getting a decent meal, but found he was no longer hungry. Instead he slinked off to his office for a little relaxation time before the streams of paperwork from the new MRI scans started to come in.

 

A few minutes later there was a short knock on the door of the office. Will entered immediately without waiting for a response. He knew he didn’t need to, he and Jonny had been close friends since they first met in college and invasions of privacy was just a part of the package. Jonny looked up and met the serious eyes of his friend. He swallowed nervously. That expression meant one thing. Will was going to give him one of his famous interrogations.

 

“What gives Jonny? There is definitely something going on with you today, you’re not yourself.”

 

Trying to deny these accusations was completely pointless. Besides, they were true. “I know I’m not. I have been doing strange things all day. I thought it was because I was hungry or something, but now I am beginning to doubt that.”

 

“What happened?” Will asked with concern. Jonny was usually so clear headed.

 

“I think it’s all because of this…..this one patient we got today. His name is Christopher. He told me to call him Chris, but I think Christopher sounds much better.”

 

“So you two struck up a conversation then? You seem to know a lot about him.”

 

Jonny blushed. “What, his name? No Will that was on his chart.”

 

“But the nickname wasn’t. And it’s not like you to remember such trivial details. What did he say to you that is affecting you so much?”

 

Jonny frowned at his desk. “It was the strangest thing Will. He fell down two flights of stairs. Naturally I thought he must’ve wanted the attention. But when I asked his how he was doing, he said he was fine. Even as his mouth turned up in a pained smile, he said he was fine.”

 

“Oh you and your stereotypes. There are exceptions to every rule you know Jon. What interests me far more is that you asked him how he was doing in the first place. That is not like you.”

 

Jonny lowered his head in shame. “I know it isn’t. I don’t know why I did it. I just…. looked into his eyes, well, his one good eye, and it just slipped out.” He sat there for a moment’s time then suddenly slammed his hand down on the desk. Will didn’t so much as flinch. “And then later I told him I hoped he would be okay! How ridiculous is that!?”

 

“This is very interesting. Not so much what you said as the way you are reacting to having said it. So you slipped up and used that god-awful word hope. So what? It happens to the best of us every once in a while.”

 

“But now he’s either going to think he will definitely get better or that he definitely won’t! I don’t want him to have to go through that.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Well, because both are horrible states of mind in a hospital!”

 

Will leaned in and eyed him curiously. “Jonny,” he said softly, “I know why it is wrong in the eyes of a doctor, but what I want to know is why it is wrong in your eyes specifically.”

 

Jonny didn’t reply. He just stared at his desk.

 

“Mull it over for a while. Then, in a couple of hours, check on how he’s doing. See what happens, see how you feel.”

 

Jonny nodded. He could swear he saw Will smirking as he left. He wondered what farfetched reasons Will had thought up. It was too bad these interrogations were always one-sided. He rubbed his head and laid it on his desk. He did not mull anything over that afternoon. Instead, he slept.

 

 

 

I wrote a poem on the bus yesterday. Sorry if you don't like the rhyming; my poems always do :)

White Shadows

 

 

After the sky loses its light

When the sun ceases to shine

The moon takes its place

If for only a short time

 

We mere humans cast shadows of darkness

And damage those who are bright

But the moon can destroy the blackness

And cast shadows that are white

 

We may disturb this natural light around us

When we do and say what we like

Maybe one day, it will be different

When we all are white shadows in the night

 

The Garden

 

(sorry, cping isn't co-operating, so this chappie is without header :P)

 

 

 

4.

I’m wheeled into Guy’s apartment. Much against my will, I must say.

 

“I can walk.” I mumble to Guy as he struggles to push the chair over a threshold.

 

“I know, but you’re not well, therefore you’re staying in the chair.”

 

I don’t have it in me to argue. I let him fuzz about. He’s made up the guest room for me and I wheel myself in there as he prepares a snack for me. He’s taken on himself to fatten me up.

 

I find myself enjoying the unfamiliarity of the room. Sure, I’ve crashed here a few times when I’ve had a little bit too much to drink, but I don’t have any emotional connections to this room.

 

Nothing to remind me of Chris. I sigh and look out the window. The summer sun is high in the sky. London weather is so fickle. Just a few days ago it was pouring with rain and ice-cold. There were reports of floods by the river. I hoped that Chris wasn’t there.

 

Shit. I need to stop thinking about him. Right now. I wheel myself out of the room and into Guy’s small kitchen.

 

“Hungry?” Guy asks, and doesn’t wait for an answer before he puts down a plate of spaghetti in front of me.

 

“You call this a snack?” I ask.

 

“Well, you haven’t had lunch yet.”

 

“I had lunch at the hospital.”

 

“You barely touched it, and I don’t really believe in the nutritional value of hospital food.”

I roll my eyes, but pick up my fork. At first I have to force myself to chew and swallow. Not that Guy is a bad cook. I mean, I’ve lived with Chris. I know bad cooking. It’s just that grief have really dulled my taste buds. I swallow another bite. Don’t think about him, don’t think about him…

 

“Talk to me.” I turn to Guy. “Otherwise I’ll think too much.”

 

Guy nods and starts to drone on about some new weird instrument he’s gotten off of Ebay. He gets really into it and soon excitedly gets up and gets the instrument. He tells me it’s called a waterphone and he sets it down on the table. It looks like some sort of toy. He picks up a bow and draws it across the rods that poke up like metal teeth from a circular board.

It sounds like something out of a horror movie. I find myself fascinated.

 

“Wow.” I tell him. “Sounds wicked.”

 

He nods and grins. “I know!” He shrugs. “I thought maybe we could use it on the next album.”

 

I nod. “Yeah… Whenever that will happen.”

 

Guy sits down next to me.

 

“Come on, man. Chin up, okay?” He swings an arm around my shoulders and kisses my temple.

 

“We’ll be alright, yeah?”

 

I lean into his touch.

 

“Thank you.” I sigh. “I was thinking… Could you maybe get me some stuff from my place if I’m going to be staying here for a while?”

 

He immediately stands up. “Absolutely!”

 

I smile at his eagerness and hand him my keys.

“I don’t know… Some clothes, my guitar… A book or two.”

 

“Sure, I’ll take care of it.” He pockets the keys. “Anything else?”

 

I shake my head. “No. Thank you so much.”

 

“Don’t mention it.” He points to my barely touched pasta. “Finish that, will you?”

 

“Yes, mum.”

 

He pokes his tongue out at me.

“See you later, son.” He laughs as he closes the door.

 

“Bye.” I tell the closed door. I find myself getting nervous about whether or not Guy’ll come back.

I push the ridiculous thoughts out of my head and clumsily wheel myself over to the TV. I turn it on and flick through the channels.

 

I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I know is Guy slamming the door and yelling out into the apartment.

 

“Hey, man, I’m back!”

 

I groggily blink my eyes and stretch my neck to ease the stiffness of it.

 

“Hey.” I say in greeting and Guy dumps something in my lap.

 

“Your mail.” He clarifies and I nod, sorting through it. He throws himself on the sofa and grabs the remote from me. I don’t care. The pile in my lap consists mostly of junk mail. But one envelope catches my eye. I pick it up with shaking hands. It’s heavy.

 

“Guy.” I say quietly. He doesn’t hear me. “Guy!” I repeat, louder this time.

 

He turns to me. “Yes? What’s wrong?”

 

“Look!” I hold out the envelope to him. His eyes widen.

 

“That’s…” He doesn’t have to tell me. I know that he recognizes Chris’ handwriting as well as I do. He looks from my face to the envelope. “Alright, Jon. Don’t get your hopes up.” He quickly says.

 

“They’re already up.” I mumble and I tear open the envelope. Guy is biting his lip.

 

“It’s a key.” I say quietly and hold out a big brass colored key in my hand. It looks old.

 

Guy frowns. “Is that all there is?”

 

“Yes… No.” I change my mind. “There’s a note.” I take out the small piece of paper.

 

“13 Blackbird Crescent.” I read it over and over.

 

“It’s an address.” Guy unnecessarily clarifies.

 

“I know.” I nod, and I feel dizzy. “I’ve walked by there a lot of times. It’s not far from here.”

I turn the envelope over. There’s no postage stamp.

 

“He must’ve come by the apartment and dropped this off.” I almost moan with relief. “He’s alright.”

 

Guy smiles brightly. “I’m going to call Will, right now.” He jumps up from the sofa and runs to get his phone.

 

I stare at the envelope. His hand has written out my name. I frown. His hand has written out my name, but he didn’t have the decency to lift that hand, that beautiful, slender hand, and knock on my door. Our door.

 

I feel so many feelings conflict inside of me that I don’t know what to do with myself.

Why couldn’t he just have raised his hand and knocked? Not that I would have been able to answer, because I was here… What if he did knock? What if I could have been in his arms this very second?

 

After all… This attempt to contact me must mean that he has forgiven me.

 

-*-

 

“What have you done, Jon?” Chris’ eyes were bloodshot from crying.

 

“Stop acting like such a drama queen, Chris!” Jonny said, throwing up his arms in exhaustion. “I really don’t have the energy for this right now.”

 

“No, that’s because you’ve been spending these past few nights out with that…” He made a face. “That girl!”

 

“Chris, I already told you, she’s just a friend…”

 

“Oh, really?” He bit his lip. “Then why haven’t you told me about her?”

 

“You don’t tell me about all of your friends!”

 

“That’s the difference, Jonny. I do.”

 

“Fine.”

 

“No, it’s not fine! I…” Chris took a deep breath and a strange sense of calm settled around him. “I don’t feel like we want the same thing here, J.”

 

“Chris, please. Just stop.” Jonny pulled off his shirt. “As I said, I’m really tired and I’m going to bed now, we can sort this out tomorrow, okay?”

 

Jonny went into their room and took of the rest of his clothes. He crawled down under the covers and snuggled deep into his pillow. He tossed and turned. The bed felt too empty without his partner by his side. He sighed. He had a sinking feeling in his stomach.

 

He threw away the covers in defeat and tiptoed into the living room. Chris lay on the sofa with his back to Jonny. He had a blanket over his scrawny form. His midriff rose with every deep breath he took.

 

Jonny hugged himself and bit his lip. No, he wouldn’t do this. He hadn’t done anything wrong. He wasn’t going to apologize. He went into their room again and had not more than put his head on the pillow when he heard the door slam. He cringed but decided not to follow Chris. After all, it wasn’t as if he wasn’t going to come back home for breakfast.

 

 

 

 

 

 

No, no, no,

This one's gotta go.

The beat, it's wrong,

What a horrible song.

The words make no sense,

The piano's too intense.

The guitar riff is dull,

The bass is destroying my skull.

Course, if we're ever gonna get this finished,

Our drive can not be diminished.

And eventually the melody will be ideal,

But for now, my friends, it's got the seal.

 

 

 

Sorry, I was gone a trip helping my sister get a wedding dress, we we're successful! :D

Iris

Fin

 

 

 

 

“We just got you blood test back from the lab, and it appears that.. Mr. Champion you are a match! As for you Mr. Martin, you too are a match! This is quite lucky considering the rarity of your blood type! So if you both are willing we need to get started on drawing your blood as soon as possible!”

 

“Right well, lets get to it!” Will said.

 

“Yeah, Jonny needs our blood” Chris said as he jumped up.

 

“Ok Mr. Champion please sit here and Mr. Martin right here next to Mr. Champion. Are either of you allergic to iodine?” Both men shook their heads. “Right and is this the correct information?” The Nurse held out a sheet of paper to both men with their full name and identity number. Again both Chris and Will nodded their heads.

 

“Wonderful, okay I will start you off first Mr. Champion.” The nurse began with the prep and then told Will to look away as she inserted the needle into the crevice of his arm. Will made a puckered up face at the little pinch of the needle, but other than that he was fine. The Blood flowed smoothly from his arm into the bag attached to the chair.

 

The nurse moved over to Chris and performed the exact same procedure only Chris said “for you Jonny, I would bleed myself dry” Chris had that cocky grin on his face but soon that grin faded and Chris became light headed and passed out, his head rolling to the side facing away from Will. The nurse chuckled and turned to Will and said, “It always happens.”

 

Will just nodded his head and looked up at the ceiling. The nurse then left the room, leaving Chris and Will to themselves again.

 

Will turned toward Chris and sighed and then said “since your out and can’t hear me, I might as well get this out of my chest and just tell you since I know you can’t possibly feel the same as me, but Chris.. you do things to me. Things that nobody has ever been able to. I feel as if everything is possible when your around, I feel no pain and sorrow when you grin your stupid little grin and.. and you give me that dumb butterfly feeling in the pit of my stomach.” Will rubbed his hand over his face in a tired manor.

 

“What am I doing, here? Why I am I talking to an unconscious Chris, Gosh I am totally hopeless!”

 

The nurse walked in and walked over to Chris to check on him, “Oh good you’re awake again! You passed out while donating blood, but look your almost done now!” The nurse patted Chris shoulder and made her way toward Will.

 

“Oh shit!” Will thought to himself, I hope Chris wasn’t awake for a long time, other wise he would have heard me.”

 

“Mr. Champion, how are you doing dear?” the nurse asked?

 

“What? Oh um Fine.”

 

“Well your all done, so let me just take the needle out.. and now please raise your arm above your head like this, perfect, hold it there for about 30 seconds and then I will bandage you up. The same goes for you Mr. Martin.”

 

Both Will and Chris held their arms in the air until the nurse told them they could put them down. She then quickly bandaged their arms and gave them some water and cookies. “ I need to get this blood to your friend so when you are feeling better you may get up and leave and head back out to the waiting room.”

 

As soon as the door closed and the nurse had left, Will jumped up and headed toward the door. His hand was on the handle about to pull it open when he felt a hand on his shoulder that caused him to pause.

 

“Will?”

 

Will closed his eyes and took in a few relaxing breaths, “Chris, you just passed out, go and sit back down and rest.” Will then pulled on the handle and stalked away leaving Chris standing at the door, watching. Will made his way back to the waiting room where Guy was still waiting.

 

Guy jumped up when he saw Will, but something was off with Will, he could just tell, it wasn’t his normal standoffish behavior rather more of a crushed man stance. Will just stood there and Guy put his arms around his friend, he didn’t know what else to do. Soon he felt the shuddering of Will’s shoulder and smelt the salt of tears that were falling on to his shoulder. Yet Guy continued to hug his friend, in fear of what would happen if he let go.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Jonny was out of surgery and in his room on multiple machines that we’re helping to keep him alive, he was in a coma, and the doctors we’re unsure as to when he would awake. To Chris the Machines we’re the beeping and whirring of Jonny’s heart, they told him that Jonny was still alive, and that as long as his heart was beating so was Chris’. Chris sat by Jonny’s bed holding his hand day and night. If you were to leave at night he would be there and when you came back in the morning he would be in the same position, head bent and hand holding Jonny’s.

 

Will and Guy visited Jonny’s room often, Guy would stay for a long time, but Will would only visit for a few minuets and then make up an excuse to leave.

 

One day after Will left, Guy and Chris we’re sitting in Jonny’ s room. Chris looked up at Guy.. “He left again didn’t he?” Chris asked.

 

“Yes, he had to go somewhere.” Guy responded.

 

“Guy, when Will and I we’re donating blood, I passed out. Did Will ever tell you that?”

 

“No, he never mentioned anything about that.”

 

“Oh, well he just, well when I woke up he seemed so.. so lost. Like he knew something had happened, and then he practically ran out of the room as soon as he could.”

 

“Chris, there’s a lot to Will, that we still don’t know, I think he is just trying to protect us from the depths of his mind”

 

“Yeah.. maybe”

 

“Chris, I’ve got some errands to run but, let me know if anything.. you know happens with Jonny!”

 

“Okay. I will”

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chris, Will, and Guy were once again sitting in Jonny’s room, It had been two weeks since Jonny’s accident and he was still in a coma. Chris was in his same spot, Guy by the window and Will by the door. Will was writing Chris a letter, in hopes that writing his feelings for chris would help him get over the fact that Chris was in love with Jonny. Will had just finished when we heard the sound..

 

“wwwwaaatte”

 

Chris jumped up from his chair and knocked it over! “JONNY! NURSE!”

 

Jonny blinked his green eyes and looked around the room, he was awake!

 

A nurse ran into the room and saw that Jonny was awake, and proceeded to page the doctor. She then walked over to Jonny and told him that she was going to remove the tube in his throat and to not move or his throat could be severely damaged. Jonny nodded his head in understanding.

 

The nurse had just removed the tube when the doctor walked in. “Mr. Buckland! I see you are awake! That is wonderful! Now I’m sure your wondering why you are here in this room, but I feel it would be better for one of your friends here to tell you, I just need to check a few of your vitals while one of them fills you in.”

 

Chris then proceeded to tell Jonny of the incident and then the doctor left the room satisfied that his patient was doing well. The nurse brought Jonny some water and told him to drink it in little sips to not upset his stomach after not having had real food in him.

 

When the nurse had left Chris spoke up.

 

“Jonny! How are you feeling? Can I do anything for you?”

 

“Chris, I’m just glad that all of you are here. I’m fine, a bit stiff, but that’s alright.”

“Jonny, Will and I need to go tell everyone the good news, But we are so happy that you are okay!” Said Guy.

 

Jonny just smiled at them and Will and Guy left the room leaving Chris and Jonny to themselves.

 

“Jonny, I have been thinking this whole time about, what I would do if you weren’t around and well I don’t think I would be around with out you. I live for every breath you take and every beat your heart makes. You are everything to me. You make me complete and well Jonny, It took me a horrible accident to see how important you are to me and.. I.I love you Jonny.”

 

Jonny looked up into Chris’ endless ocean eyes and smiled. “Chris, thank you. Thank you for freeing me. I have been hopelessly enamored by you since college. Since you first knocked on my door and demanded that I be in a band with you and, when I first saw you truly smile, when you call me Jonny boy on stage and dance around me and.. I love you too!”

 

“Crash!” Will had been standing in the door and heard the entire conversation, he dropped everything he had been holding and ran. Ran to the exit of the hospital into the middle of the street. He was trying to run away from his broken heart, he tripped often but got back up and ran some more. He only stopped running when the drunk driver struck him. He didn’t get up that time.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

4 years have passed since Will’s death. Guy couldn’t bring himself to play music anymore and so Coldplay never made any more music. Jonny and Chris married and we’re about to have their first child.

 

“Chris, what should we name our son?” Jonny asked.

 

Chris looked up from a worn piece of paper in his hand. The paper had been folded and crumpled and cried upon many times. He looked back down at the paper and smiled and said, “Will. We should name our son after Will, the man that also held my heart.”

 

 

 

HEATHCLIFF

Epilogue

 

 

 

 

"Chris?" my voice traveled cautiously through the hallway, bouncing back loudly in my ears. Grimacing in plain fear, I shuffled in and shut the door behind me, shoving my hands into my pockets.

 

"In here," called a sing-song voice from the other room.

 

It took me nearly a minute to gather up the courage to tiptoe through the hall and through the open doorframe. Chris was huddled over something on the counter, his arm moving back and forth in a steady motion. "I said I'm here," he repeated, a little louder. He probably hadn't heard me come in.

 

"I see you," I said quietly.

 

"Oh," he chirped. "So you do."

 

"What are you doing?" I asked, desperately searching for something to talk about.

 

"I was just reading a cookbook."

 

"You can't cook," I said bluntly.

 

Chris narrowed his eyes and heaved a sigh. "I know that, Guy. Thanks for reminding me, you git." My heart skipped a beat, but Chris's eyes twinkled and he waved his hands around dismissively. "I was only joking," he laughed. "Just kidding."

 

I shifted from foot to foot, and dared to take a few steps closer. Chris crossed his arms.

 

"Look, Chris...I..."

 

"Hm?"

 

"I...I'm..."

 

"What?"

 

"I'm..." I took a long, shuddering breath. "I'm sorry."

 

"Sorry?" he repeated blankly.

 

"For everything," I continued. "I mean, I treated you like shit. Honestly." I screwed my eyes shut, not wanting to have to look into his eyes.

 

"Guy..." Chris sounded like he was on the verge of tears. His voice shook slightly, and I could hear him squirming.

 

"And the truth is," I choked out, "you're more than a friend to me, you're like a fucking brother to me...I dunno," I said quickly. I was threatening to teeter over the edge into hysteria.

 

Suddenly, Chris's warm, slightly moist hands were clutching the sides of my head. He pulled me closer, and to my utter amazement, planted a kiss firmly on my lips. It didn't last more than a second, and he quickly pulled away. I sputtered and shivered, unable to form coherent words.

 

"Jesus, I'm sorry," he squeaked, laughing nervously at the same time. "I'm just so happy..." Tears were spilling out from his eyes and trickling down his cheeks. Ignoring the stupefied expression on my face, he threw his arms around me and crushed me against his chest. Unconsciously rocking back and forth, he stroked my hair with one hand and held firmly onto my shirt with the other. "I missed you so much," he whispered. "You're my little Guy...I love you too."

 

I hesitantly slid my arms around him. In my eyes, I was still quite undeserving of his affection.

 

"Don't be scared, I'm not mad."

 

"Why not?" I blurted out.

 

"Because," said Chris, still refusing to let me go, "I understand you."

 

"Really?"

 

"I knew you'd feel bad about what you did."

 

"You knew, did you?" I smiled.

 

"Yeah, I did. Because you always do, you little bastard."

 

It took me a moment or two to respond. "Wait till I tell Jonny that you kissed me," I said finally.

 

Chris just buried his blond head into my shoulder and laughed.

 

 

 

Far From Easy

 

 

“Can I come over?”

 

“Yeah, sure. I'm not doing much anyway, and it'd be nice to have some company.”

 

“Good, because I'm outside your door right now.” Chris smiled lightly and lowered his phone as Jonny opened the door. “Hey.”

 

“What would you have done if I said no?” Jonny laughed.

 

“Uh... left, I guess.” Chris briefly thought back to his dream and innocently raised his eyes to Jonny. “Actually, could we take a walk? It's a beautiful night out.”

 

“Sounds great.”

 

 

 

“Look at all those stars,” Jonny said in amazement as they walked down the sidewalk.

 

Chris chuckled and asked, “Are they yellow?”

 

“At least one of them's bound to be,” Jonny laughed in return. Then he turned to look at Chris, the same amazed expression dancing across his face. “I'm glad that you seem to be feeling better.”

 

“Yeah...” Chris let a few seconds of awkward silence pass by before he spoke again. “Jonny, have you ever thought that maybe we're meant to be more than best friends?”

 

Jonny thought for a moment instead of answering right away, but he kept his eyes on Chris. “Have you?”

 

“No,” Chris quietly said, “but now I'm considering it.”

 

“You are? Why?”

 

“Because I had this dream... but you still haven't technically answered my question.”

 

Jonny moved his eyes down to see his feet glide across the pavement as he and Chris crossed the street. When they reached the other side, both men simultaneously stopped, and Jonny kept his eyes lowered.

 

“For the past week or so, I've been very... confused,” Jonny timidly began. “But now that you mention it... I guess I have.”

 

“Last night I had a dream where you and I...” Chris tried to finish, but was overwhelmed with the sudden flush his cheeks had attained. “It wasn't anything dirty, of course, it was just nice. I actually felt really happy.”

 

“A dream, hmm?” Jonny mused. “And you think it might have been prophetic?”

 

“...Yeah.”

 

“I think it might have been, too,” Jonny said in a deep voice. “How exactly did the dream start?”

 

“Well, it started something like this,” Chris hesitated for a slight moment, then reached forward and grabbed Jonny's hand. “And then we go back to your place,” he said in a near-whisper. Then he quickly decided to reiterate, “Not dirty.”

 

“OK,” Jonny replied, “but I have a better idea.”

 

Chris looked up and waited for Jonny to continue, but he didn't. Jonny tightened his grip on Chris's hand and started to lead Chris down the street. Chris didn't ask any questions, and so they just walked in silence until Jonny began to slow down a few minutes later.

 

When they stopped, they were somewhere around the middle of a giant football field. The goals at either end were barely visible through the looming darkness, but their faint outlines were just enough to inform Chris of his whereabouts. He wasn't altogether surprised that Jonny would bring him there, but he was wondering what exactly they would be doing.

 

“Chris, I've had dreams before, too,” Jonny said, still holding onto Chris's hand and using his other one to brush Chris's cheek. “They were more like daydreams, though, but... I've always wanted to have someone to share this with.”

 

Jonny slowly leaned in, and Chris welcomed Jonny's lips as they brushed his own. Jonny slid his hand down and raised his other one, wrapping them both around Chris's neck. Chris rested his own hands on Jonny's back, involuntarily comparing reality with his past dream.

 

Reality was so much better.

 

 

 

“Do you really think it would be that easy?”

 

Chris forcefully blinked a few times, trying to make sure he wasn't actually going crazy. But sure enough, what he saw in front of him was more than just his own reflection.

 

Chris spun around and thus turned his focus away from the bathroom mirror. It's always a little weird for people to see what they really look like, since being in their own body sort of distorts their view of themselves, though not in an entirely bad way. But to see his own body standing in the same room as him, breathing and living just like he was, led Chris to believe that something was wrong.

 

 

 

6.

“So I’m sorry about this…” Jonny said. “But I actually have to lock you in here.”

 

Thalia nodded and looked around the gaudily decorated room. “I guess I don’t have any say in that anyway.”

 

“No. Sorry.” Jonny was clearly uncomfortable. “I really need to go.”

 

“Listen!” Thalia exclaimed. “I know it really isn’t any of my business… But… I heard you through the door.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“I’m so sorry; I hope he gets better soon.” She blurted out.

 

Jonny nodded and looked over his shoulder. “So do I.”

 

Thalia smiled a small smile. “Is he your boyfriend?”

 

Jonny blushed. “I don’t see how that’s any of your business either, but…” He smiled. “Yes, I guess you could say that.” He raised his eyebrows. “Are you hungry?”

 

Thalia bit her lip.

“Yes… But I don’t know if I’m supposed to eat anything while I’m here.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“I’ve always been taught never to eat fairy food. If you do, you’re trapped forever.”

 

Jonny held back a laugh.

“We’re not fairies.”

 

“Oh.” Thalia blushed. “Sorry.”

 

“Have you ever seen a fairy? They’re like” He held out a small space between his hands. “This small.”

 

“Well, I’ve never seen one.” She sat down tiredly in a chair. “I wasn’t even considering their existence a few hours ago.”

 

“Listen, I’m really sorry that you’re being thrown into all of this. I am. But I need to go and be with Chris now.”

 

“Oh, yes, of course! Sorry.”

 

“I’ll send someone with some food for you.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Don’t mention it.” Jonny quickly exited the room, locked the door and made his way back to Chris’ dressing room.

 

He told the crowd outside the room to get lost, in a very gentle manner, of course, and they soon began to disappear to their respective rooms.

 

He walked into the room and stood still in front of the door, taking in the scene.

 

The situation had caught up with Dianna and she sat cross-legged on the floor and cried her eyes out, her back shaking. Guy was hovering around her, not really knowing what to do. He finally gave up and sunk down on his knees next to her and put his arms around her, holding her tight and rocking her back and forth. He was clearly trying to keep his own tears back as she buried her face in his neck and sobbed.

 

Will sat in a grand red velvet chair and was turning the mask over in his hands, a concentrated expression on his face.

 

Chris lay still on the sofa, his face was a chalk white and his breathing was shallow. Jonny felt his knees buckle and he barely made his way to the sofa before he broke down in tears. He put his head on Chris’ shoulder, inhaling his sweet scent with a shaky breath.

 

He felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Will.

 

“I’m sorry, Jonny.”

 

“Will he wake up?” Jonny quietly whispered

 

“Yes.”

 

“Oh, thank heavens.” He breathed a sigh of relief and put his head back on Chris’ shoulder.

 

“But he won’t be able to use the mask.”

Jonny nodded.

 

“I’m very adamant about this, Jon. If he uses it again, it will kill him.”

 

The harshness of reality sent cold shivers down Jonny’s spine. He grabbed Chris’ hand. It was cold.

“So that’s the end of the theatre?”

 

“I don’t know.” Will admitted.

 

“No one will be able to carry the role as he does. And him not being able to perform…” He shook his head. “That alone will kill him.”

 

“I know.” He took a deep breath. “That’s why I have a suggestion.”

 

“What is that?”

 

“We need to fix the mask... Or even better - find a way to fix his eyes without the mask.”

 

“Come on, Will.” Jonny hissed. “You know as well as I do that we’ve been searching everywhere for something to make him get his sight back… We’ve been looking virtually every day since the accident.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And when we found the mask, we thought that all our troubles would be solved…”

 

“I know, Jon.”

 

“You know that it hurt him from day one?”

 

“It did?”

 

“Yeah… I don’t think he told anyone but me and Dianna.”

 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Will threw him a disapproving glare.

 

“Would it have made a difference?”

 

“No.” Will sighed.

 

Jonny nodded a little and smoothed down Chris’ curls.

 

“Could I have a moment?”

 

“Sure.” Will said and went over to Guy and Dianna, who were still embracing on the floor. Dianna’s sobs had subsided but she still had her face buried in Guy’s neck. He was gently stroking her hair. She held on to him for dear life.

 

“Uhm, guys?” A bleary eyed Dianna looked up and wiped her cheeks. Guy reluctantly eased his hold on her. She, however, did not. She slipped her arms around him again.

 

“What is it, Will?” She asked in a small voice.

 

“Jonny would like a moment alone with Chris.”

 

“Oh.” She stood up and slipped her hand into Guy’s as she did so. He stood up as well and intertwined their fingers. Suddenly her knees started to shake and Guy caught her just in time before she fell down on the floor.

 

“Careful.” He said in a low voice.

 

“I’m dizzy…” She mumbled.

 

“Don’t worry, love.” He said. “I’ll take care of it.”

 

He gingerly picked her up and carried her out of the room, Will following close behind.

 

Jonny watched the door click shut and turned back to Chris.

 

“Oh, love…” He whispered and kissed his forehead.

 

“Please don’t leave me. I won’t be able to live without you. I really should tell you this every day… But I hope you know it anyway. I try to show you with every smile I give you. Do you know that even the smallest touch from you sets my body on fire?” Jonny blushed.

 

“I’m surprised my heart hasn’t beaten through my chest yet. It beats so hard every time I’m near you. And when you touch me… I swear even you have to hear it pounding then. It almost hurts.” He felt his eyes well up. “I love you, Chris. You’re my everything. Please stay with me. Please.”

He put his head on Chris’ shoulder again and inhaled. Perfection. He felt the hair on his arms stand up and he felt a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach. He was overwhelmed with love for the man lying on the sofa. He kissed Chris’ unresponsive lips.

 

“I’ll fix you Chris, I swear I will.”

 

 

The Partay, and Spell-Check Doesn’t Seem to Acknowledge the Awesomeness of the Word ‘Partay’, Which Hahna, Personally, Finds Insulting, Since She's a Super Homo Sapiens Who is a Lot Less Cooler than Rachel, Because She is Automatically Awesome Since It’s Her Birthday Today and She is Fourteen, a Year Older than Hahna and Will Use Her Superpowers From Being So Old to Protect the World From Those Nasty Imitation ShamWow’s and Slap Chops! (Plus, Hahna just sucks so it’s not hard to be more epic than her, but still Rachel’s awesome! Hahna didn’t word that right, did she? Hahna fials.)

 

 

 

“Crank up the music, bro!” As requested, Will quickly pushed the volume button on the stereo and blasted some Bratz music. “Silly Willy Billy, you’re a legend, mate!” Guy started dancing like a lobster when Bratz Forever Diamonds came on.

 

“Guy!” Will yelled ridiculously loudly. “GUUUUUUUUYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!”

 

After, like, the twelve-thousand-hundred-million-hundred-hundredth-thousand-times-infinity try of screaming at Guy, Will finally got his attention. “Gosh, Guy, we should be ashamed. We’ve been dancing like freaking bacteria instead of working on our genius plan!”

 

“…got any new ideas to add to it?”

 

Will sighed. “Nope… Original plan will have to do…let’s hope they fall for it.”

 

“Mmmmmhhhhhmmmmmm” Guy nodded and grinned. “Rad as radish, duuuuuuuuuude.”

 

“And now we wait.”

 

--

 

A knock came from the door. The knock was gentle, graceful…and who am I kidding myself? I don’t use adjectives well. Anyway, Will, unusually energetic (or maybe it was the candy Guy put in his awesome strawberry jam – ‘cause it’s the best kind and all– sandwich), and he spriiiiiinted to the door

 

“Chris! Chris!” Will said, talking very quickly. “Glad you’re here. Now, I have someone to introduce to you.”

 

“…who?”

 

By the time Chris had gotten that out, Will had already dragged himself and Chris to the couch, where a relative stranger sat.

 

“Chris…this is Phil.” Will scurried away and went into the kitchen to join Guy.

 

Somehow, within a few minutes, Phil and Chris were making out on the sofa. Guy and Will’s plan had worked.

 

I watched it all from the anonymous safe house of the tree. I wanted my Chrissy. I wanted SpongeBob. I wanted SpongeBob. Apparently repetition is necessary to be a good super villan...awesome...

 

Someday, Jon. Someday. Mwa hahaha mwa hahahahahahahahaha!

 

 

 

 

This is my twisted way of saying ‘Happy birthday, Rachel’. :P:lol::lol::lol:

PS: that was freaking awful sorry:P:lol::lol::lol::lol:

PPS: that was also very short sorry:P:lol::lol::lol:

PPPS: Happy birthday!!:heart::heart::heart:

PPPPS: I stayed up until midnight to post this:awesome::awesome::awesome:

 

 

 

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMYN4djSq7o]YouTube- Llama Song (with official MP3)[/ame]

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWRyj5cHIQA]YouTube- DJ Steve Porter featuring Vince Offer - "Slap Chop Rap"[/ame]

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwRISkyV_B8]YouTube- ShamWow (Full Length)[/ame]

 

 

 

7.

 

 

Guy made his way through the empty corridors with Dianna in his arms. She rested her head on his shoulder.

 

“Where to?” He asked. “Your room?”

He felt her nod against his neck, soft hair tickling him.

 

He took a left in a secluded part of the backstage and Dianna reached out and opened the door.

 

Her small room was dark. Guy, however, knew where her bed was and gently put her down before extracting a silver lighter and proceeded to light candles that sat on every surface in the room.

Soon the room was bathed in a warm, golden glow. Guy sat down on the edge of the bed.

 

“How are you holding up?”

 

She reached out for his hand and held on tightly.

“It’s… Difficult.” She said in a small voice. “But…” She bit her lip.

 

“Yes?”

 

“It’s better when you’re around.”

 

Guy suddenly felt very self-conscious and drew his free hand through his dark hair.

 

“Guy?”

 

“Yes?” He turned to face her.

 

“I… This thing with Chris has really made me think.” She stared at the stone ceiling. “It has made me realize that it’s silly not tell people what they mean to you before it’s too late.”

 

“What are you saying?” Guy quietly asked, staring intently at her.

 

“Could you lie down next to me?” She asked and met his gaze.

 

He nodded and slowly crawled up the soft mattress until he was lying by her side. She intertwined their hands again.

 

“I’m saying…” She took a deep breath and turned to face him. She smiled. “I’m saying that you always light up my day. You make me feel safe. You make me smile, despite feeling like hell. My heart beats a little faster every time you’re around.” She pulled on his hand. “Feel for yourself.”

 

She put his hand over her heart. The corners of Guy’s mouth turned up.

 

“And?”

 

“And… Well.” She sighed. “I love you.”

 

“You…?”

 

“Love you. More than I’ve ever loved anyone before. I think you’re the one. You were made for me. I can feel it.”

 

Guy was silent and Dianna released his hand.

 

“Oh.” She said starting to get up. “I’m so sorry. You don’t feel the same way. I should’ve known. Sorry.”

 

He pulled her back down and silenced her by gently pressing his soft lips to hers.

 

“I do.” He whispered when they pulled apart.

 

“What?” Dianna asked, feeling dazed.

 

“I love you.” He kissed her again. “I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you.”

 

“I can’t believe this…So much time wasted…” She whispered and carefully traced the outline of his face in the soft light.

 

“No.” He fiercely said and leaned his forehead against hers. “I’ve gotten to spend every day with you for so many years now. And that has been worth more than anything else.”

 

She smiled.

“You sure do have a mouth on you, mister.”

 

He leered. “It’s good for other things than talking, you know.”

 

Dianna had to catch her breath at the mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

 

“Oh, I don’t know if I believe you.” She airily said.

 

“Is that so?” He answered and moved closer to her, pressing his toned body against hers.

 

She sighed happily.

 

“I guess I’ll just have to show you then.” He huskily added in his wonderful accent and kissed her neck.

 

She held him close and shut her eyes, and they forgot their troubles in each other arms, whispering sweet nonsense and kissing each other all over.

 

-*-

 

Will stomped over to the guest room and unlocked the door.

 

“Hello, young lady.” He greeted Thalia. “My name is Will Champion, I’m the owner of this theatre.”

 

She stood up and held out her hand. She let it drop as Will didn’t respond the gesture.

“I’m Thalia.”

 

“Indeed.” He sat down in a chair and nodded to her to sit down in the chair opposite him. “Now…” He folded his hands in his lap.

 

“Now you’re going to tell me exactly how you got through the doors and into the theatre.”

 

Thalia began to unfold her story under the watchful eyes of Will. She had just finished when the door to the room slammed open.

 

It was Jonny.

 

“Will, you need to come quickly, Chris is waking up and he’s in a lot of pain.”

 

Thalia felt her heart jump with excitement and stood up as Will did.

 

“You’re staying here.” He said and she sat down under his angry stare.

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

She watched the door shut and she took off her shoes, pulled up her knees to her chest and put her sock clad feet on the velvet chair. She sighed.

 

Being alone and locked away in a place that could be Wonderland really sucked.

 

 

Mirrorball

Chapter 4

 

 

 

There was an echo in Jonny’s head. At first it was faint, but it steadily grew louder until it was a constant, pulsing beat. And it sounded familiar. It reminded him of Will. He jerked his head up. It was the sound of knocking.

 

“Come in,” he called with uncertainty. He was disoriented and had no idea who could want him right now.

 

A nurse entered carrying a large stack of paperwork. Jonny could tell that she noticed he had been sleeping, because she looked embarrassed and remorseful about interrupting his nap. “These are for you to look through, when you have the time,” she stuttered. “It’s from those bus crash patients from earlier.”

 

“Thank you.” Jonny gave her a tired smile and she backed out of the room in a hurry. Jonny hated the place in society that his name tag gave him. He had everyone’s respect, but not their friendship. This was why he was glad to have Will, at least.

 

He spent a good hour or so looking everything over. None of the patients had any major head trauma. This was good news. Jonny wanted to believe that he was happy that those poor people weren’t badly hurt. In reality he was just happy that he would have only one patient to check on tonight.

 

Right on cue, it seemed, his beeper went off. He looked at is watch in surprise. He had no idea it was six o’clock already. He left his office quickly and there was a bounce in is step. Finally he would be escaping the mundane duties of his job and could be entertained. It was time to check on Chris.

 

He couldn’t help his shocked expression when he entered the room. Chris’s arm was covered in white plaster that went from his hand all the way up past his elbow. But his face had been cleaned of blood, so that was an improvement, although small. “What happened to you?” he asked with a smirk.

 

“My two left feet happened,” Chris replied sheepishly. He grinned. “So what have you got in store for me this evening doctor?”

 

Jonny ignored the question. “You can call me Jonny.”

 

“Okay, Jonny then. What are you here for?”

 

Although Jonny knew Chris meant no harm by it, he couldn’t help feeling a little hurt by Chris’s words. “Well….” He stuttered, trying to keep his professional manner intact. “I would like to check on the looks of that head wound again. We’ve got to be careful to monitor for any signs of infection.”

 

“I got it stitched up a bit.”

 

“Yes, that will help it heal faster. But I still need to check it out.”

 

“Okay,” Chris said feebly.

 

Jonny looked straight at him, the way he would if he were relating horrible news to the relatives of a patient. He didn’t know what made him do it. But he spoke in a soft and comforting voice. “I know it hurts. I really am sorry about that. It will only take a second, okay?” And now he was acting like he was dealing with a young child. He rubbed his face with frustration. He needed to get a grip.

 

“Okay,” Chris said, sounding more assured. He actually did sound a bit like a little kid, and it made Jonny want to smile. Gently lifting the bandages away from Chris’s head, he did a quick examination. The stitches had indeed made the injury look a lot better. And there were no signs that might point to infection. He gingerly covered it with the bandages once again.

 

“You’re all set for now, it looks just fine. No sign of infection at all.”

 

“That’s good.” Chris was visibly relieved. Somewhere deep inside, Jonny was disappointed. He couldn’t explain why, but secretly suspected that it had something to do with the fact that an infection meant he would be staying there late. Chris cleared his throat. “Thank you for being so kind to me. I appreciate it. I know I might not be the easiest person to deal with.”

 

“Don’t mention it. You are a fine patient. Better than most actually.”

 

“Oh….good!” Chris exclaimed happily. “I was so worried I was being a burden.”

 

Jonny shook his head at him. “You are quite a character you know.”

 

Chris grinned widely. Caught up in the moment, he sat up energetically to give Jonny some sort of clever reply. But he forgot an important factor. He immediately fell back down on the bed, wincing in pain.

 

Instantly Jonny was worried. “What’s wrong? Where does it hurt?”

 

Still wincing through the pain, Chris gave a raspy reply. “Oh don’t worry, it’s nothing. Just a few cracked ribs.”

 

Jonny’s eyes widened. He forgot all about being professional. “Cracked ribs!? My god you did all that damage falling down some stairs?”

 

“Hey, it was two whole flights,” Chris defended.

 

“True,” Jonny chuckled. He watched Chris with pity as he tried to make himself comfortable. “I’ll have one of the nurses bring in some extra pillows. Since you can’t have any more medicine, you need all the help you can get.”

 

“That would be nice,” Chris said wistfully.

 

Jonny went into the hall and walked up to a nurse and gestured to where Chris was. “No one told me the patient in this room had cracked ribs.”

 

“Well…it was on his chart,” the nurse replied nervously, not wanting to seem disrespectful.

 

“Oh I never….I mean….I guess I must’ve missed it.”

 

“We all make mistakes,” the nurse said, forcing a small smile.

 

“Yes,” Jonny agreed. “Now, is there any chance we can get the man in that room some more pillows? He’s in a good deal of pain.”

 

“Right away.”

 

Jonny stood in the hall like a zombie. He hadn’t checked the chart. He couldn’t believe how careless he was being. It was scaring him. The blinds of the glass-walled room were open. Jonny watched as a nurse came in carrying a few fluffy white pillows. She helped Chris position himself with them. He watched as she left the room. And he watched as a contented smile crossed Chris’s face as he finally became more comfortable.

 

He felt an odd feeling in the pit of his stomach. He didn’t know what to do with himself. He checked his watch. Much to his relief, it was now seven o’clock. His shift was over. He could finally escape this place and the hopefully the weird way he had been acting. It was time for an evening of relaxation and a full night of sleep.

 

 

 

 

Far From Easy

 

 

“Don't even think about it.”

 

Chris looked up at the version of himself sitting beside him on the couch. His eyes flashed with anger as he said, “I wasn't going to.”

 

“Do you think you're an idiot?” other-Chris asked. Chris shook his head. “Then why would you think I am?”

 

“I wasn't going to,” Chris insisted in a mumble as he turned away. “Besides, what would be so horrible if I did?”

 

“Oh, gee, I don't know... everything?”

 

“You make it sound like I'm trying to light the world on fire or something. Everything would definitely go wrong then.”

 

“You may as well be,” other-Chris replied. “Chris, things don't always turn out the way you want them to just because you want them to turn out that way. You can wish really, really hard, but if something's gonna go wrong, it's gonna go wrong. It doesn't care what you think, or feel, or whatever. It's just gonna go wrong.”

 

“What if this doesn't go wrong?” Chris quietly asked. He brought his legs up and folded them against his torso, resting his chin on his knees. “Hmm?”

 

“Well, then you'll be blessed with immense happiness, won't you?” other-Chris sneered. He then put on a girlish voice and proceeded to mock Chris in a ridiculously exaggerated manner. “Oh, my name is Chris, and I like Jonny. He's been my bestest friend ever since I met him, and oh, I just want to run up to him and kiss him, and I know he'll kiss me back because we're bestest friends, of course he feels the same!”

 

“I'm not stupid, I know there's a chance he won't feel the same,” Chris snapped. “But... it's not even worth trying?”

 

“You've been best friends with him since you met, don't you think that by now you'd know if he felt the same?”

 

“I didn't always feel this way,” Chris simply replied. Other-Chris shot him a blank stare and said nothing in return. “I didn't know I always felt this way. Maybe he didn't either.”

 

“Guy knew. Will knew. Do you think then maybe Jonny knows? If he knows, why wouldn't he say anything? Unless he doesn't care...”

 

Chris, completely fed up by this point, stood up and stormed into the kitchen. He filled a glass of water and downed it along with some aspirin, hoping that the hallucination was just a weird side-effect of his throbbing headache. Of course, he knew that even if it was, it was still a worrying sign of imminent insanity- or it was a worrying sign of present insanity.

 

He sat down at the small kitchen table and tried to relax. If his other self didn't show up anytime soon, then he would take that as a good thing. He laid his head down on the cold table surface and closed his eyes. The headache still pounded, but he tried to ignore it as best as he could.

 

Soon he was with Jonny again, both quietly sitting in somewhere that Chris recognized, but he couldn't quite put his finger on the name. It was a small cafe, almost completely empty save for he and Jonny and a few other customers. He could have sworn that he'd been there before, but he had no luck remembering. In any case, he decided he'd much rather focus on Jonny.

 

“This is just a dream,” Jonny plainly informed Chris. Chris paused for a second, then nodded his head.

 

“I know. Are...” He looked around a little, then gathered the courage to continue. “Are we on a date?”

 

Jonny looked up with those brilliantly green eyes of his, shot Chris a look of indifference, and gave a small shrug. “It's your dream.”

 

“Then, that makes it yes or something?”

 

“Sure.”

 

Chris tapped his fingers on the table for a few minutes. He was just staring for a while, until he finally reached across the table and placed his hand over Jonny's. His smile as he looked up at Jonny turned into an uncontrollable giggle, and he blushed a little. Jonny stared back, but he didn't look quite so happy.

 

“Wake up,” he demanded. Chris tilted his head and looked at him incredulously. In a much clearer and more emphasized tone, Jonny repeated, “Wake up.”

 

“But I like it here,” Chris quietly said.

 

“WAKE UP!”

 

Chris jolted and his eyelids flew open. Hoovering over him, practically breathing fire down his neck, was his other self. Chris apathetically raised his head, only to find that not only had his headache remained, it had worsened.

 

“Don't do that to yourself!” other-Chris shouted. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

 

“You,” Chris yelled back. “You're what's wrong with me.”

 

Other-Chris narrowed his eyes and grabbed Chris's wrist, yanking him out of the chair and dragging him to the door.

 

“Where are you taking me?” he asked his other self.

 

“You'll see.” As they left the apartment and started for the stairs, neither of the Chrises said another word. In fact, it was quite a long time before either spoke again, almost until they were at the end of their journey.

 

 

sacrifice

 

 

a story in which Phil isn't an evil mastermind or criminally insane. EDIT: Or in love with Chris. :P

 

 

 

 

 

Phil sat in the big arm chair that Chris's mother had so graciously pointed out to him. The young man pulled his knees shakily to his chest, rubbing at his eyes with cold fingers. His vision was beginning to fail him. His stomach hurt.

 

Over the past few weeks, he'd done nothing but work and study. His best friend had put him in charge of getting his band a big break, and Phil wasn't about to let him down. But all the work he was doing hadn't done any good for his already frail and worn-out body. He studied. He worked. He studied. And then he worked some more.

 

Phil closed his eyes and sank further into the chair.

 

The ticking of the clock was like music to him. And that was all he could hear. Just music.

 

He'd heard the fledgling band's songs more times than they had. He'd played them for anyone he could find. He'd recorded tapes and given them to anyone of high rank who would talk to him.

 

Phil was tired.

 

He could feel himself getting weaker with each passing day.

 

Chris would bound up to him, the man's eyes practically bulging out of his curly head. "Did you find anyone yet?" he would ask.

 

"No," Phil replied. "I'm sorry."

 

"That's okay," Chris would say, his gaze dropping to the floor.

 

Phil would feel guilty and apologize again, only to have Chris mutter something illegible and walk dejectedly away.

 

"My mum told me you were here," said Chris, his voice hitting Phil's brain like a large brick. "It's so late," he whispered, fumbling for the light switch.

 

"Leave it off," Phil begged. "Please, Chris. My head hurts."

 

"Are you okay, man?" Chris dropped down by the armchair, gripping his friend's sleeve. Phil just shivered and shook his head.

 

"The man I talked to today said no to you guys," he muttered, his voice weak.

 

Chris was silent for a moment. "That's all right."

 

Phil nearly let out a wail of desperation and exhaustion. "I'm trying, Chris. I'm trying as hard as I can. I know how much this means to you."

 

"Fucking hell, Harvey..." whispered his friend. Chris sat on the arm of the chair and gently wrapped his arm around Phil's neck. Phil let himself slump against Chris's side. He was drifting in and out of consciousness...in and out of despair.

 

"I don't wanna let you down."

 

"You never will."

 

"I'll get you boys a deal," Phil continued as Chris hugged him closer.

 

"If you don't, it doesn't matter. You'll still be my best friend."

 

Phil smiled sadly. "I know, Martin. I know."

 

And for the first time in twenty-five hours and three minutes, Phil Harvey fell asleep.

 

 

 

This is for Dianna.

 

Iris: The Epilogue

 

 

 

 

Jonny had just placed the sleeping Will in his crib. He moved over to the baby monitor and turned it on to the channel that was linked with the other monitor in his and Chris’ room. Jonny turned around to see will smile in his sleep, and he too smiled and kissed his forehead and headed over to the door, before he left the room completely he took one last look at his son, blew him a kiss, closed the door and walked down the hall.

 

Chris was standing in front of the bathroom mirror when he felt the familiar arm wrap its way around his waist. It sent shivers and tingles down his spine. He turned toward the beautiful man who was playfully tugging at his shirt. Chris looked at the glowing green eyes of the man and then moved his mouth up to his ear and breathed heavily and said in a seductive whisper.

 

“ I’m not much use standing here, you best move over to that bed or who knows what might just happen.”

 

“Oh, is that so? Hmm well, we will just have to see.” Replied Jonny as he began to tug at the elastic of Chris boxer’s.

 

Chris moved his hand down Jonny’s back and pulled himself closer to Jonny’s body. He could feel his steady heartbeat and his chest rise and fall from the deep breaths he was taking. It was a feeling he could never forget. The feeling of being loved.

 

Soon there were no clothes left on either man and they had somehow managed to make it to the bed. Hands were gripping tighter and pulling each other closer. Kisses were shared with eager passion and moans shouted with ecstasy.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chris and Jonny were laying in the tangle of sheets on their bed. Jonny had an arm wrapped Chris’ torso and Chris had his head on Jonny’s shoulder. Chris was tracing the scars on Jonny’s stomach from his surgery, forming little shapes and patterns.

 

“Chris?”

 

“Mmm, yes love?”

 

“I know we named our son after Will, but I.. I just I always wondered why you said the other man who held your heart?”

 

Chris was silent for a few minuets before responding to Jonny’s question. “J, I should have told you this a while ago, but I didn’t feel it was necessary with all that had happened.”

 

Chris felt Jonny tighten his grip and his heart beat faster.

 

“It happened a long time ago and it is in the past, so please just.. just listen, okay?”

 

Jonny closed his eyes and took in a deep breath and then let it out slowly “okay.”

 

****Many years prior, told in Chris point of view****

 

“We had just finished playing that gig where we first heard people singing along with our songs, you and Guy had already left but I was still there. I had thought that Will had left too, until I heard the shower and the faint muffled sound of someone singing. I peeked my head into the room and saw Will singing some Oasis song in the shower, I started laughing cause he was singing into a bar of soap and then it slipped out of his hand, and he was franticly trying to catch it.”

 

“Well I guess he heard me and turned around, and I swear to you he blushed! I saw the blood rush into his cheeks! I know its crazy; it’s not the typical Will behavior, but let me tell you it was like magic in that moment. One minute he is singing in the shower and the next he is biting his lip and blushing. He just looked so adorable.”

 

“I don’t know what came over me; I couldn’t control any part of my body. My feet started walking toward him and my hands were taking my clothes off. In my mind I was screaming what are you doing? But my heart wasn’t hearing any of it. I would have thought that Will would have punched me square in the face at the moment, but strangely enough he did nothing, in fact he seemed to have this.. this aura about him that was drawing me nearer and nearer until I was next to him.”

 

“I’m not sure what happened next, but somehow I was in the shower with him and he had me pinned up against the wall. He was staring into my eyes and I back at his. Then his lips were grazing mine and I reached up and put my hands behind his head and pulled him in. We were kissing for what seemed like an eternity to me. We only stopped when one of us needed air. Our bodies move in sync and everything just sort of blurred around us.”

 

“My mind finally took control of the situation and I dropped my hands and my lips went limp. I had no idea what I was doing. Will looked at my frantic eyes, he stepped back and said sorry and ran out of the shower as quickly as he had pulled me in.”

 

“Jonny, I never knew, he had deep feeling for me until that day at the hospital. After that incident neither of us mentioned it, and soon it just got filled away in the crevices of my mind. I only fully understood his love for me when I read his letter.”

 

Chris reached across Jonny and pulled open the nightstand drawer and pulled out a letter. The same letter that Chris held when Jonny had asked what to name their son.

 

“Here, perhaps you should read this.” Chris handed Jonny the letter and laid his head back down on Jonny’s shoulder.

 

Jonny turned the letter around and around in his hand debating on reading it.

 

“Chris, I don’t feel that I need to read this, I know that Will was a hidden man, and he might have held you heart, but what’s in this letter is for you, not me. Will probably wrote powerful things that were meant for you and I don’t want to spoil his memory. I love you all the same and know that you have my heart as well.”

 

Jonny then bent down and kissed Chris long and hard and wiped the lone tear from his cheek. “That is from Will, the only man I will allow to hold the other half of your heart.”

 

 

 

The Garden

 

5.

 

I sit and turn the key around. The weight in my hand is somewhat comforting. It’s a sign that Chris is alive. That’s a lot right now. I hear Guy say goodbye to Will and he comes back into the room.

 

“Will was ecstatic.” He smiles. “He’s on his way.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Ehm, because we’re checking out that address, of course!”

 

“I think Chris wants me to go there by myself.” I mumble.

 

“What’s that?”

 

I repeat what I just said.

 

“Ha!” Guy barks out a laugh. “No way, man.” He shakes his head. “He means as much to us as he does to you. We’re coming along. Whether you like it or not.”

 

“What if Chris doesn’t like it?”

 

“Chris doesn’t have a fucking say!” He yells out and throws his phone to the ground where it shatters. “Shit.” He’s shaking while he picks up the pieces. I find that fitting somehow. Guy’s always picking up the pieces.

 

“I’m sorry.” I say. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

 

“You didn’t.” He sighs and sits down, looking hopelessly at his broken phone. “It’s just… We’ve all been waiting for so long for a sign from him. I’ve been so fucking worried about him. But I couldn’t show that, because you were such a wreck and Will… Well, you know Will. Not that big on emotions.” He takes a shaky breath. “And now when we get a sign that he’s alive, it’s addressed to you!” I can see him slowly break down in front of me. I let him go on.

 

“I love him too! Maybe not in the way that you do. But he’s my brother, for crying out loud! Just as you are, and Will are. But this shitty disappearing act that he’s pulled has drawn us so far apart from each other that I don’t know how we’re ever going to be alright again!” He sobs and puts his face in his hands. “And now he’s back!” He desperately keens in the back of his throat. “And he made me break my phone!”

 

I slide out of my chair and fall down next to him. I put my skinny arms around him and pull him close. His breath comes out in short puffs.

 

“Shh…” I comfort. “We’ll be alright.”

 

“Yeah?” He sniffles.

 

“Of course we will. We’re brothers.”

 

I don’t know for how long he sobs on my neck, but he goes on until Will arrives and lets himself in.

 

“What’s going on?” Will asks when he walks in on the scene.

 

“Will!” Guy sobs out and reaches out for his hand.

Will immediately kneels down next to us and grabs onto my shoulder. His look is worried.

Guy throws his right arm around Will and pulls him into our embrace. And then Will is quiet.

 

He’s the quiet rock that always keeps us grounded. Chris used to say that it was me, but I’ve never been stable enough to be a rock. Will is, though, and as he slowly rubs circles on Guy’s back I feel my heart swell with love for these men. They’re my inner circle and brothers in arms.

 

They will always be mine and I will always be theirs. No matter what comes our way, we will stand as one in the end.

 

Guy’s sobs soon subside and we get ready to head out the door. We leave the chair behind. Guy takes one last look in the mirror.

 

“Shit, I hope no one sees me.”

 

His eyes are bloodshot and crimson, he’s pale and he really looks like death warmed up.

“You look fine.” I tell him and hand him a pair of sunglasses. “But you could always wear these if you’re worried.

 

“Thanks, man.”

 

I nod and we make our way out to Will’s car. I feel nauseous with excitement. Guy is all jumpy and once we’re in the car his legs start to shake.

 

Will, however, is calm and carefully drives us through the busy London streets.

 

The drive to 13 Blackbird Crescent is short and we pull up to a big brick wall. There’s a door in the middle of it. It’s a big, black, wooden door in between rows of red brick. The brass number 13 shines in the afternoon sun.

 

“Well?” Will says and I can see that he’s finally a bit shaky as well.

 

“Here goes nothing then.”

 

I push the key in with shaking hands .It fits. I look to the other two. Guy licks his lips and stares at the key. Will looks at me.

 

“Go on, Jon.” He quietly says.

 

I nod and turn the key. The door swings open with a creaking and we step through the opening.

We all gasp at the splendor before us and Guy tears of his sunglasses.

 

It’s a walled garden.

There are cherry blossom trees with their pink petals littering the ground under our feet. We carefully tread down a small gravelly path. There are all kinds of roses that perfume the air with the sweetest scent. Guy sighs.

“Wow.”

 

Will and I nod in consent. We’re absolutely awestruck. There’s emerald ivy clinging to the red bricks and the sun paints the green foliage in gold.

 

Butterflies swarm around a patch of honeysuckle. We follow the path further into the garden.

And then I see something that makes my knees buckle. I struggle to breathe. There, sitting still on a wooden bench with his hands folded in his lap and his eyes closed as he basks in the sun, is Chris.

 

He looks so at ease that I just want to smack his beautiful face. His hair is longer, it has grown into a mop again. I must have started to cry, because my next breath catches in my throat. Guy grabs my hand and Will takes a deep breath.

 

Chris must’ve finally felt our presence, because his cerulean eyes finally open and he’s staring right at us.

 

He stands up and wipes his hands on his cargo trousers. His lithe hands are covered in dirt.

He comes closer to us, and I feel the urge to take a step back.

 

Will puts his hand on my shoulder and gives me a reassuring squeeze.

 

Chris comes up to us. I swallow. I can hardly breathe. I don’t know what to feel. One half of me want to shout and cry and the other one just wants to throw Chris down to the ground and kiss him silly. He shuffles his feet and actually has the decency to look sheepish.

It’s Will who opens his mouth first.

 

“Did you do all this?”

 

Chris seems taken aback by the question and he blinks a few times.

 

“Yes.”

 

The sound of his voice is too much and I fall down to my knees and gasp for breath.

 

“Jonny!” He cries out and falls down next to me. The mention of my name makes me cry even harder and he throws his arms around me. “I’m so sorry.” He whispers over and over into my ear. I could just die right there in his arms.

 

He turns up to Guy and Will. “I’m so sorry!” He tells them too and I feel his hot tears fall down on my neck. I feel myself embraced by two additional sets of arms.

 

After a few minutes we all break apart, Chris is keeping a death grip on my hand.

 

“Come on.” Chris says and he leads us into a small house at the farther end of the garden.

 

“You’ve been staying here?” Guy asks. He doesn’t really have to ask, because there’s a well used piano there and half eaten chocolate bars everywhere. Chris’ Flaming Lips shirt is thrown over a chair.

 

Chris nods.

“It’s been really lonely.”

 

We all sit down around a small wooden table by the window and he pours us tea. He has four chairs for some strange reason.

 

“Why didn’t you come home if you were lonely?” Will asks, shaking his head in disapproval.

 

“I tried to.” He shrugs. “Pride took the best of me in the beginning… And then I’d started to arrange this garden thing and…” He laughs. “I just couldn’t leave it unfinished.” He takes a deep breath. “It became a sort of metaphor.”

 

“What do you mean?” Guy asks.

 

“All spring I’ve seen this garden grow and change… But the components have all been the same.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“And I kept hoping that even if I stayed away for a while… That it would be the same with you guys even if we had changed a bit along the way.”

 

“You’re an idiot.” I can’t stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

 

Chris looks devastated.

“I’m so-“

 

“No. No more apologies. You left me. You left us without any word and you have been gone for almost five months. I’ve been devastated. I thought you were dead! I looked for you every day. I fucking mourned you and you didn’t have the decency to at least let us know you were alive.”

 

“You’re right.” Chris says and put his head in his hands and sighs.

 

“I know I am.” I say and I pout. I feel really angry as the excitement of meeting him again dies down.

 

“I’ve really missed you guys.” He says in a small voice. “And I swear that I’ll never do anything like this again.”

 

Guy looks from me to Chris and finally reaches out and touches Chris’ hand.

He bites his lip. “I don’t know if I forgive you, Chris. But I’m just really happy to see you again. We’ve really missed you too.”

 

“Yeah?” His eyes light up.

 

Will nods too, but I can see that he’s not really there yet.

 

“Jon?” Chris turns those hopeful, puppy dog eyes to me.

 

I open my mouth to tell him to shove it, but then the prospect of lying without him in my arms for another hundred plus days overwhelms me and I close my mouth. I put my hands around his head and draw him close instead. I get lost in the familiarity that is his soft mouth and I think I’m crying again. I lose all sensation of time and space until Guy pointedly coughs.

 

“Uh, yeah, guys. Get a room.”

 

Chris and I break apart, still looking deep into each other’s eyes. He smiles and I smile and then we all laugh, and as the sun sets on the small house hidden in the garden we try to find a way to be the people we once were. And even though everything has changed, it somehow all feels the same.

 

The End

 

 

A Message 2010 <3

 

 

 

This story was actually my first written Buckin fic, which makes this quite old. I wrote it for Rachel over a messenger conversation, but it turns out that she saved my original draft! When she bought her new computer, she was convinced the story was gone forever, but she found a backup copy. Ever since then she has been nagging me to edit and post this fic.

So, I decided to finish and post this for her birthday :smug:

Happy Birthday, Rachel :heart::kiss:

 

 

 

Things had been peaceful at Jonny’s flat, until he began having company. Chris was staying over, as he was in the process of searching for a new home. He’d been there for a mere three days, and had already altered Jonny’s own sleeping schedule to his.

 

Chris was seated in the living room, writing some music, when Jonny comes in. He was sleepily sporting his flannel pajamas and a pair of fuzzy slippers. Characteristically enough, he hadn’t taken his cap off. He stopped before Chris, who innocently looked up to see Jonny with his hand on his hip, awaiting his response. He asked Chris to shut off; he’d been trying to get some rest.

 

Chris checks the time- it was indeed later than he’d expected. He nervously scratches the back of his head, murmurs an apology, and quickly stored his guitar away. Jonny yawns and stretches as he walked back to his bedroom; battle won.

 

He lay in bed, looking up at the ceiling. He turned over, and stared at the wall opposite to him. He knew it was absolutely no good- he couldn’t sleep. Even though he was in an entirely opposite end of the house, Jonny could still hear Chris humming merrily to himself in the bathroom.

 

Jonny recognized that tune to be the same one he’d been strumming earlier. He began to feel bad, and angry with himself, as he was fully aware Chris would forget that catchy tune in the morning. Then proceed to whine and complain about it for a few hours.

 

More like, he felt bad for his ears.

 

Then again, his head would have to process the high-pitched words, so he must feel bad for those poor throbbing temples…

 

Just as he thought he’d been diving into a rather interesting debate with himself, Chris exits the bathroom. As usual, he leaves the light on, without realizing.

 

Chris’ humming grew louder; the louder his voice became, the more restless Jonny became. He had apparently found some lyrics, but they always had room for cursing, whenever he got his own tune wrong. Jonny laughed- he’d always been amused by Chris screwing up his songs.

 

Chris had heard Jonny’s laughter. He walked over towards Jonny’s room; he stopped and leaned on the doorway, teemed with attitude. “What’s so funny, J? Oh, was it my impersonation of, um… myself?” Jonny cracked up in laughter once more. Chris adored the sound of his voice, especially when he was joyful.

 

Jonny sat up to look at Chris- he was wearing his baggy checkered pajama pants, with a light-colored long-sleeve. He noticed he’d still been wearing his bracelets, which he seldom removed from his wrists. Jonny decided to speak, for he thought he’d been staring for a beat too long.

 

“No, it’s just the fact that a lot of things become funny when you’re sleepless because of a certain sleepless guest,” Chris took this with no trace of offense.

 

Instead, he apologized for being such a burden. “Though, I don’t think I’d mind disrupting Will’s sleeping schedule. Maybe then he’ll like at least one of my song ideas.”

 

“I think the chances of that plan working are very slim,” he told Chris.

 

“Aw, I was hoping it would,” Chris started to whine as he walked into the room. He sat in a chair opposite to Jonny’s bed. He stopped, pensive for a few moments. “You know, I value your opinion, J, a whole hell of a lot,” he stated.

 

Jonny stared into Chris’ caring eyes. Even in the half-lit room, he could still clearly distinguish the brilliant sparkle of his beautiful blue eyes. Though he wanted nothing more than to have Chris as more than just a friend, he didn’t mind admiring from afar. The man is gorgeous, who wouldn’t?

 

Chris noticed that Jonny was admiring him, he had always noticed. Though, he wasn’t sure he could return that same type of admiration. He felt it deep down, but also felt something one-sided; he felt he loved Jonny more than anyone else, meanwhile Jonny loved and appreciated him as a friend, and role-model of some sort. This made him uneasy and slightly depressed as he knew it was impossible. Quickly, he noticed that he’d been looking at Jonny, and feared he was making himself obvious. He panicked.

 

Chris looked away more sharply than he intended to. Chris could sense Jonny was offended and hurt somehow… Chris stood, ready to leave, but he found he was physically unable to. He glanced back at Jonny and at his pleading look. There was a simple question he found- pleading him to stay behind, to not leave him. Chris reconsidered himself, and instead sat himself down in the corner of Jonny’s bed.

 

He was seated cross-legged, several inches away from his love, and Jonny couldn’t feel more uncomfortable. He held a powerful desire to tell Chris, but he held himself back, on the count of it would feel increasingly more uncomfortable, given their environment. He could get the entirely wrong idea, both being seated on his bed.

 

The two talked over whatever came to mind for a few hours, until Chris became sleepy. “Alright, J, I think I’ve bothered you enough,” he said as he stood.

 

“Yeah, the sane person can only handle so much of you,” Jonny agreed.

 

“Right, I trigger psychopaths… so that’s what happened to that other guitarist… I have to be careful to not have you thrown into the loony bin ‘cause of me.”

 

Jonny laughed, which made Chris’ spirits soar. Jonny was so beautiful to him; his pale green eyes were brightening the room.

 

Chris could go on for hours about Jonny, without ever repeating a single complimentary word. Millions upon millions of things he could be able to rant on and on about, remained unspoken. Chris decided that he’d be better off speaking to himself of them for the remainder of the night. He bade Jonny goodnight, then made his way towards the guest bedroom.

 

Jonny pulled his blanket up and scrunched an area in his palm. He wished what he was holding was something more comforting and beautiful than a square of fabric. He wished it was Chris’ hand. Jonny attempted to fall asleep any way he possibly could. He daydreamed, stared at his wall, closed his eyes and saw the black. Eventually, he settled for a calm state, fooling his tired mind of his peaceful slumber, though he wasn’t. He couldn’t be. He had Chris in his mind- who stubbornly refused to leave. He had no choice… he had to tell him.

 

Jonny had to- it was burning more powerfully than a hundred million candles inside of him. Somehow, there was an odd feeling that Chris returned everything he could not give physically. That Chris felt the same feeling with his heart, along with the same thoughts in his mind. Both needed to know for sure of the other.

 

He lifted himself off of his bed. He needed to conclude his hiding at that opportunity. He’d thrown many others away, but this would be a definite exception. He could not hesitate any longer, and neither could Chris. Through the opaque room, neither man noticed the other, until they ran straight into one another.

 

Jonny’s face collided with Chris’ shoulder, causing Chris to stumble backwards. He then hit a coffee table and lost his footing entirely. Jonny hadn’t hit anything, so as soon as he realized the noise he’d heard was a rather loud crash, he switched on the nearest lamp. He searched his surroundings to find Chris sprawled out on the floor.

 

“Chris, you okay?” Jonny half-mumbled his concern.

 

“Yeah, I’m alright,” Chris moaned. “I didn’t break any of your trinkets, did I? ‘Cause if I did, I could replace them…”

 

Jonny told him it was okay then proceeded to help Chris up. He sat on the sofa and stared at the floor he’d recently been lifted from. “Jon, I actually got up to tell you something…” Chris nervously began. This worried Jonny; Chris was never nervous for anything.

 

“Me too, Chris…” Jonny stumbled.

 

Chris paused, considering his reply. “I hope it’s the same thing I’m about to tell you, J… we could go on three, just to make sure.”

 

“Uhm, I don’t think that’s-- but alright, I guess…” Jonny tried to say.

 

“Okay, Jonny… one, two, THREE!” As soon as Chris had finished counting down, they both uttered what they needed to say.

 

“I love you, Chris!” Jonny exclaimed. He heard what Chris had said, and was shot through the heart immediately. Chris had simultaneously said “I left a note for you on the fridge, Jon!”

 

Chris drained of all color. Jonny had followed through, but he’d chickened out, settling for a scrawled note to say it for him. He felt ridiculous.

 

Jonny stood- in shock- he walked away. Chris instinctively stood, and forcefully took the smaller man by the shoulder to face him. He hesitated, staring into his misty eyes for a split second before pulling him closer, eliminating the space between their lips. Chris pulled apart and appeared proud of what he’d just done.

 

“Oh, by the way,” Chris started, reaching to the fridge. “Here’s the note,” he handed it directly to Jonny. The note held a single poem, which read;

 

“There are words I need to say,

They have come with such delay,

Because I’m a fool, I could not express,

These things ‘cause I’m such a mess,

Through my idiocy you see sweet,

Your tolerance cannot be beat.

 

So, my words become all too clear,

Jonny-boy, I need you to hear,

No matter what I’ll be still,

I’ve always loved you, and I always will.”

 

Jonny bit his lip. Chris’ anxiety grew to the extent which he felt he was going to spontaneously burst into tears if he didn’t reply. Jonny looked up to meet Chris’ eyes for a split second, repeating what Chris had done. He pulled their faces together for a kiss.

 

While holding Jonny in his arms, Chris hadn’t felt better in his life. He finally felt light-hearted and appreciated. More importantly, loved by the one he loved. Jonny mirrored this through his lovely, captivating smile. They gazed into each other’s eyes for quite some time before Jonny decided to speak.

 

“I’m still sleepless, Chris… I’m not sure I could give you my accurate words until the morning.”

 

“Okay, then… I have an idea,” Chris said as he led Jonny towards the sofa. Chris lifted his guitar from its case once more, and began playing. Jonny laid his head upon Chris’ shoulder- it felt quite heavy for him, as he’d been starting to doze into sleep. Chris’ voice was a melodious and heavenly sound that rang through the apartment. It chorused through Jonny’s body, welcoming his sleep. Chris was comfortable to lean against, which made falling asleep much easier. Quickly, Chris noticed Jonny was no longer paying attention, as he was peacefully dreaming with his arms wrapped tightly around him. Waiting, he stared into the dark. Chris waited until Jonny was deep in slumber to shift him off.

 

He placed a small blanket over Jonny, and placed a fluffy pillow underneath his head. Chris lay on the floor, while taking a couch pillow for himself. He took Jonny’s hand, and closed his eyes, finally having his thoughts were at ease. Jonny’s wonderful words would again ring true in his ears by morning- that he was sure of. It wasn’t long before he, too, was comfortably asleep alongside his love.

 

 

 

 

Glue

 

 

 

"Craftscraftscraftscraftscraftscraftscrafts CRAFTS!"

"Yes, Chris, it's time for crafts."

"I wanna make a picture!" Chris said, jumping up and down.

"Calm down and take a seat, please," the teacher said. "I'll get you some markers and paper."

Chris leaned over to the little boy sitting beside him.

"I'm going to make a picture," he excitedly whispered.

The little boy just gave Chris a shy smile.

He looked down at the table and adjusted his green cap.

The table was covered with various crafty items.

Scissors, paper, markers, crayons, popsicle sticks-

"Glue!" some kid called out. "Jonny, can you hand me the glue?"

The boy with the cap looked up at the mention of his name.

He grabbed the glue off the table and handed it to the other kid.

"Thanks!"

Jonny looked back at Chris.

Chris was holding a black marker firmly in his left hand and scribbling all over the paper.

Jonny was a little jealous.

He wished he could have been as artistically gifted as Chris.

Or anyone else in the room for that matter.

 

 

"Jonny?"

The teacher knelt down beside Jonny. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," Jonny sadly replied.

"You don't want to draw like Chris?"

Jonny shook his head.

"I'm not a good draw-er," he said.

The teacher frowned and looked around the room.

She spotted another boy standing by an easel.

"Do you want to paint like Will?" she asked.

Jonny shook his head again.

"I always make a mess with paint," he said.

The teacher deepened her frown and pointed to two girls.

The girls were digging into a tub of beads.

"You could make bracelets with Dianna and Katie," she suggested.

"That's for girls," Jonny replied, crinkling his nose.

"You could..."

The teacher's eyes were frozen on a boy in the corner.

It was the boy who asked Jonny for the glue.

"What is that boy doing?" she said to herself. "Guy!"

Guy turned around, holding a bottle of glue in one hand and several popsicle sticks in the other.

"Yeah?" he innocently replied.

"What are you doing?" she asked him.

Guy stepped over to the side, revealing a giant popsicle stick building.

It was at least four stories tall and intricately built.

The teacher just stared in amazement.

She turned back to Jonny and asked, "Are you sure you don't want to draw?"

Jonny looked at Chris again.

Chris was still drawing with the black marker.

"I don't want to draw."

"Well, we have to find something for you to do..."

The teacher reached across the table and grabbed a bag of something multicolored.

"How about you make something with these pipe cleaners?"

Not wanting to disappoint her, Jonny agreed.

"OK," he quietly replied.

 

 

Jonny took out a few pipe cleaners and began to bend them into different shapes.

He worked on it for a few minutes until the teacher came over again.

"How are you boys doing?" she kindly asked.

"Done!" Chris shouted, throwing the marker onto the table.

"Yeah," Jonny agreed.

He set his work down gently on the table.

Chris stared at it and gasped in awe.

"Jonny, is that a guitar?" Chris asked with wide eyes.

Jonny nodded.

"It looks like a box with a stick," another kid snobbishly said.

Chris whipped his head up and snapped, "It's a beautiful guitar!" Then he turned to Jonny and said, "I got your back."

"Thanks," Jonny smiled.

"Miss Anna, wanna see my drawing?" Chris asked the teacher.

"Sure," she said, kneeling down to see.

Chris proudly held out to paper.

Two stick figures were in the middle of the page.

One had lots of curly hair, and the other was wearing a hat.

Everything was drawn in black marker, except for the hat that was colored in green.

"Is that you and Jonny?" the teacher asked.

"Uh huh," Chris chirped, "he's my best friend. One day we're gonna get married."

"Are you?" she asked with a small laugh.

"Yeah, 'cause that's what best friends do." Chris smiled widely and turned to Jonny. "Right, Jonny?"

"Yeah," Jonny replied.

"Um, boys don't get married," a girl across the room said.

Chris turned to see who it was.

It was Katie.

"Katie, shut up!" Chris yelled. "Jonny and I are getting married, OK?"

"Chris, don't tell Katie to shut up. Be polite," the teacher said.

Chris lowered his head and quietly replied, "Sorry, Miss Anna."

"I think you should apologize to Katie," she told him.

"Sorry, Katie," Chris mumbled.

"Katie is right, though," she said, "boys don't usually get married to other boys. Boys get married to girls."

Chris looked up at her with big sad eyes.

"But I want to get married to Jonny," he said.

"Well, you're a little young yet, anyway," the teacher said. "You won't be getting married anytime soon."

"Especially not to any girl... especially not Katie," Chris said with disgust.

"What's wrong with Katie?" the teacher asked.

"She's always mean to me!" Chris replied.

"Ah, that's because she likes you," she quietly said.

Chris's eyes flew open.

"She likes me??" he incredulously repeated.

"Sometimes little boys and little girls tease each other when they like each other," the teacher explained.

Chris turned to Jonny and frowned. "Sorry, Jonny, I guess we can't get married. I would never tease you."

"Oh, OK," Jonny replied.

"Do I have to get married to Katie?" Chris asked the teacher.

"No, you don't," the teacher answered.

"Good," Chris breathed in relief, "Because I think Dianna is much cuter."

Chris looked across the table at Dianna, who was staring at him in shock.

Her cheeks were as red as a tomato.

"I'm sorry, Chris," Dianna began, "but I don't like you like that. You're a nice boy, but... but no one compares to Guy."

Dianna batted her long lashes in the direction of the boy with the glue.

"He's so handsome," she said, dreamily sighing.

Chris looked at Katie.

Katie smiled back at him and girlishly flipped her dark hair to the side.

Chris thought for a few moments, then turned back to Jonny.

"Jonny, I changed my mind," he said. "From now on, I will tease you all the time."

"You will?" Jonny asked, rather unsure of what to make of this information.

"Yes," Chris answered, "like, your hat is really ugly, Jonny."

Chris stared blankly for a few moments, then started to giggle.

Jonny smiled back, and Chris quickly planted a small kiss on Jonny's cheek.

"OK," the teacher said, "I think it's time to get back to class."

 

 

Far From Easy

 

 

 

“When am I going to be doing this seeing, now?”

 

“Soon. If you'd just shut your trap, maybe we'll get there quicker.”

 

“It's not like I've been yapping away this entire time,” Chris quietly replied.

 

“Oh, it's not like I've been yapping away this entire time,” other-Chris mimmicked.

 

“Real mature. That definitely shows who's the more rational of us.”

 

“Eh, I'm not the one hallucinating.”

 

“You kinda are, if you're me.”

 

“Maybe I'm not you.” Other-Chris stopped dead in his tracks, nearly causing Chris to bump into him. He was only other-Chris for another few seconds, though, before he changed into a copy of Jonny. “What would you think about that?”

 

Chris froze, caught between trying to remind himself that it was just a hallucination and slow down his rapid heartbeat, and trying to fight back the tears that were being brought on by the frivolous strain he was putting himself through. He could not for the life of him understand why this was happening to him, why he couldn't just let himself be.

 

“Chris?” a voice hesitantly called out, interrupting Chris's thoughts. Chris spun around and his imaginary Jonny was replaced by the real thing.

 

“Jonny...” Chris looked around briefly and through the darkness saw that he had ended up at the base of Jonny's apartment building. “What are you doing here?”

 

“Well, I live here. But you...? You don't...”

 

“I... wanted to talk to you?” Chris unconvincingly replied. He cleared his throat and tried again in a much stronger tone. “I wanted to talk to you.”

 

“You wanted to talk to me, but you sounded shocked that I was here?” Chris bit his lip. This was one of those times where Jonny's quick wit, something he admired most of the time, was actually working against him.

 

“I'm a little nervous,” he admitted.

 

“Why are you nervous?” Jonny moved so that his face was lit up by the streetlight. Chris moved so he could be closer to Jonny.

 

“Because it's really important.” Chris could hear his other self breathing into his ear, standing so close that their bodies were almost conjoined. “And I'm afraid you might not like it.”

 

“Won't like it,” other-Chris whispered, “he won't like it, Chrissy.”

 

“Well, Chris, you're always so paranoid,” Jonny said. “I'm sure whatever it is, I won't mind.”

 

“Look at his eyes, he's lying,” other-Chris murmured through the corner of his mouth.

 

“I don't know, but...” Chris paused and took a deep breath, quickly closing then reopening his eyes. “It's worth a shot, right?”

 

“Shot through the heart?” other-Chris cackled. Chris resisted the urge to swing his fist back into his other self's face, mostly on account of the fact that he'd look utterly insane doing so.

 

“Just tell me what it is.” Jonny sounded tired and a little annoyed, which made Chris's heart sink a bit. The last thing he wanted to do was upset Jonny, but the first thing he wanted to do was tell Jonny how he felt, and it seemed like the two conflicted.

 

“Jonny, it's not really easy to say this, but...” Chris started, furiously ignoring the sounds in his ear. “But I think that... I'm in love with you.”

 

Jonny stood frozen and unblinking for quite some time, other-Chris dancing around and howling with laughter all the while. A few minutes later, Jonny coughed some air out of his lungs, and Chris flinched as he waited.

 

“Well, Chris...” Jonny looked down at his hands, furrowing his fair eyebrows. Chris's heart skipped several beats and his stomach was slowly eroding with the acid burning inside and making him undeniably nauseous. Jonny looked back up, at it seemed from his change in expression that he noticed Chris's well-being- or lack thereof. “Are you OK, Chris?”

 

Chris tried to respond, but it wouldn't work. No words were coming out. He tried to look around to see if his other-self was still being a jerk, but he couldn't move either. Jonny grabbed a hold of Chris's shoulders and shook him a little.

 

“Chris!” he shouted. Chris blinked, and something weird happened. “Are you OK??” Jonny repeated, honestly frightened.

 

Chris moved his eyes around. It was light now, and he could see his surroundings perfectly. And there was this heavy weight in his hands. He looked down to see what was causing the bother, and he pieced his findings together with his previous results to deduce that they were doing a soundcheck.

 

The stadium was mostly empty except for crew, and he was holding onto his guitar. It seemed as though Jonny had his guitar, too, until he placed it on the ground and grabbed onto Chris. Chris looked briefly at his shoulders and Jonny's hand, then raised his eyes to Jonny's deliciously green ones.

 

He wasn't trying to, of course, but he felt the tears glide down his cheeks as he slowly shook his head. “I need help, Jonny.”