All right. Then my advice is this: you're not in a state to fix anything right now, so wait it out until you're tired enough to sleep and deal with it in the morning. (Or the next day, or the day after that... if you can't handle it in the morning, that's fine.) You'll be less unbalanced then and more capable of thinking rationally; it might not seem like that now but trust me, it's usually the best thing to do. Try to chill as much as you can (even if you can't) and just go to bed as soon as possible.

I haven't read latest posts but seriously Violet you have to be patient, the right person will come, but before that you have to be rejected or have failed relationships before that, it's the natural progression I guess.

But it will happen.

 

Yes. Please, like I said, chill as much as you can and just go to bed. It does wonders, I swear.

Oh, but I have been rejected. Numerous times. :|

So what? What if the person you liked turned out to be a complete jerk?

Violet, shh. Just sleep. If you can't sleep, and staring at the wall until you do wouldn't help (which it doesn't sound like it would), do something repetitive until you can. (Cleaning? as an example.)

I can't do this anymore, guys. I'm going to bed. I should have known I would end up like this. I'm really sorry you all publically had to witness me having an existential crisis, and I'm really sorry for the swearing; I only do that when I'm really really upset about something (which, if it was not made obvious by now, I am). I know it really didn't sound like it from how I was talking, but I do appreciate the tidbits that you guys are giving me. It gives me a little solace knowing that there are at least people out there who care about my well-being.

I can't do this anymore, guys. I'm going to bed.

yayyyyyyyyyyyyyy

I should have known I would end up like this. I'm really sorry you all publically had to witness me having an existential crisis, and I'm really sorry for the swearing; I only do that when I'm really really upset about something (which, if it was not made obvious by now, I am). I know it really didn't sound like it from how I was talking, but I do appreciate the tidbits that you guys are giving me. It gives me a little solace knowing that there are at least people out there who care about my well-being.

 

You're going to be fine. Everyone has crises. It's fine. I promise.

My advice is going to be essentially what a few other people have already said, but I'll make it really short:

 

You'll "find" somebody after you stop "looking". It will eventually just happen.

:hug:

 

It'll be fine! Just wait and see :nice:

O HAI GUIZE.

 

So, after I left the comfort of the Internet and went to my room, I just lost it. It was gross. YEAH CRYING MYSELF TO SLEEP AT NIGHT. :|

 

I don't really know how I feel right now. My morning walk/jog turned out to be a failure, so I'm not necessarily in the best of moods, but I guess I'm kinda sorta better than I was last night.

Awww, shit, I'm about to start crying. I don't even know what for, given how nice everyone is being. FUCK. I think I'm going to go do my weight work now. Maybe that will help.

 

:hug: be yourself, your personality, not the others people to dictate what you should be. is the confidence to be. you are not nothing and attract people.

be strong and cold as those in this way with you. they will respect you more.

but you know, just do not attend, the superficial people, you have nothing to offer to them.

in this world everyone wants perfection, there is absolutely nothing in perfection. you will not find love or respect in the middle of these kind of people and never happy .

And we all have dark nights of the soul. But the sun always comes up in the morning and we get on with living life. :sunny: (Which happens to be the best way to meet the right someone- being out there living, doing what you love, willing to meet new people in the process.)

 

Oddly the little part in brackets is what I think is the best advice in this thread. It sounds like you spend a lot of time moping about being alone, if you keep focusing your energy on finding someone, when you actually do you'll have nothing to talk about. I don't know if you've been in a longer term relationship but really, it becomes a part of life very quickly, and it's not pure 100% happiness there are ups and downs, it becomes the same as it was before, the same contentedness you find in yourself except with someone else. I'm not doubting the importance of love, but to have this mindset that you are everything with a partner and nothing alone, that's going to get you nowhere, and you are building love up to be this great happiness which is infinite and eternal, it's not, it's just a fancy word for liking some a lot- and in turn hating them sometimes too. If it makes you THIS sad then you've built it up too much, and you need to take a step back and relax because nobody will ever meet that level of requirement to turn you from depressed into extremely happy (Maybe for a short while), and that will be disappointing

 

But you didn't really seem to listen to anyone else anyway so I'll just stop there.

I'm not one to talk much but I'd have to agree with what everyone else has said. I think you should just give it time and be the one to go to social events to meet people. As I've learned staying at home and not being the one to make the change won't change the situation. Of course there will be hardships along the way. But you're not alone. I mean I've always been really quiet and shy and unfortunately the last two girls I really liked were already taken :(

But that still isn't going to set me back and make me stop looking for a GF. So even though you may have been rejected in the past it shouldn't stop you either.

 

I'm sure you'll find someone eventually... just give it time. :)

But you didn't really seem to listen to anyone else anyway so I'll just stop there.

 

Excuse me? EXCUSE ME? I wouldn't sit here and make a fucking thread about my personal problems if I wasn't willing to listen to people. For you to sit there and tell me that I didn't listen to anything anyone else said...I'm sorry, but that just pisses me off to no end. I'm not that stupid to sit here and vent my soul to people I have never met just to ignore them.

 

I'm pretty sure I clarified this, but I guess I'll have to say it again. I mentioned that I feel this way SOMETIMES. There's a huge difference between having occasional surges of loneliness and being someone who's obsessed with this sort of thing and is just an emo kid all the time. That's not me. I think generally speaking, I handle myself pretty well. At any rate, even if what you said about not listening was somewhat true, it's really really hard to listen to other people when you're stuck in a pit of your own sadness, particularly if you're doing what I'm doing by talking over the Internet. It's vastly different.

 

While I'm on this, let me say that I completely understand that it's not just a bed of roses when it comes to such things. I see it everyday with my own parents. They have their on and off moments. (Honestly, they have them more than they probably should, but I won't get into that, because this isn't about them.) I'm not blind to the dangers of it all.

 

God, I'm just mad. You can say a lot of things about me. You can tell me that I need to re-evaluate where I'm at before moving forward (which I'm pretty sure is true), you can tell me that I just need to slow down, you can even tell me that everything is hopeless for me. But don't you DARE tell me that I didn't listen to anyone, because I did. I've given what has been said here a lot of thought, and even though I'm still trying to get through it all, I think I'm heading in the right direction.

I said you didn't really seem to listen to anyone, and how did I jump to such an assumption? Read your responses over, constantly ignoring positive feedback and advice, focusing on how you've heard this all before, people have told you such things and we're still wrong, and the one thing you actually have a thought out response to is a slight criticism. I don't know anything about you, I suggested you didn't seem to be listening and if you look at your responses I don't see how you can argue that a person must be some kind of warped monster to come up with such a conclusion. Now you can say you have listened everything said, well that's fine, but I just said that you didn't really seem to listen to anyone, that's the impression I got and I'd accept it completely if there's responses I missed that really seemed to take things on board (I'm not re-reading the thread) I just remember seeing among a lot of positive advice- CAN SOMEONE FIX IT, and it's like, they're doing their best?! So it didn't seem to be going in.

 

If I'm wrong about that then I'm sorry, essentially it makes no difference, I don't see why you took it so heart-crushingly personal and actually got angry about it, you don't know me and it was merely an observation based on your lack of acknowledgement to quite a few points, it's a totally reasonable thought, and I'm being honest, if you know that you listened then why are you getting angry about it? I could be wrong, so what the fuck does it matter what I think?

 

One negative suggestion compared to a showering of advice and compliments and you probably wrote more about the negative comment then the total sum of responses to the positive ones, what does that tell you? You really need to calm down if you're as angry as that post suggests, and take a step back, look at the thread and realise why I got that impression and why I wrote that, I said what I thought from what I observed and I didn't present it as a fact, and at least I got somewhat of a response to the actual points I was making to try and understand you and where you're coming from, most people didn't get that. With explaining yourself and why some of what I said doesn't really apply to you, then I could have responded and actually look to move things forward, but I doubt at this point you want any further advice from me.

 

I won't be responding further and I hope this post helped to explain and calm you down instead of making things worse, but venting your soul on the internet can lead to some harsh responses, all things taken into consideration, mine wasn't, and it wasn't intended to be.

Yeah I don't think he meant it in a bad way

Alright, whatever, fine, I'm wrong. Now that we've established that, can we just move on? I don't know why I ever thought this would be a good idea. I'm sorry for wasting everyone's time.

I don't think you were wasting anyone's time, I think Reilly was just pointing out that you were really distraught, which you definitely were. :shrug:

 

I hope you've gotten better too :sad:

Well then, he should have said it like that instead of saying it in such a way that it would seem to me that he was implying that I was an ignorant and ungrateful jerk, which was pretty much how I took it when I first read it.

 

On a side note, since that night, other than my getting (unnecessarily?) annoyed at Reilly (which seemed to be misguided, according to everyone else), I have been much better, thank you.

Oh, that's good, I'm really glad. :hug: it's gonna be fine, Violet. gonna be fine.

You'll eventually find someone. I being such a steppenwolf hopefully believe it.

^^ Yeah, I know. Things could be a lot worse than they are. I should really just be happy that I have so many wonderful friends who care about me and focus my attention on them and my family.

You'll eventually find someone. I being such a steppenwolf hopefully believe it.

 

Steppenwolf may be my favorite book ever.