Maybe it's rather radical to say this but for me sexism already starts when the man (and most of the time the woman too) just automatically assume that the woman takes the man's last name after the wedding because, you know, she's the woman after all. :shrug:

that depends of the culture, even when here -Spain- society is also sexist, and extremelly sexist at times -as traditionally the dessert was for the male cause he 'works', excuse me, do housewifes don't do work at home? :confused: also the chance to study longer or even go to uni-

here when a woman marries doesn't take the male surname as hers, she keeps hers, but anyways here people have 2 surnames: father surname + mother surname, that's being changed and will go in alphabetical order or depending on the civil servant likes. :uhoh:

althought here traditionally a woman indeed keeps her surname she use to be refered as the wife of mr (husband surname).

i could be wrong but i think other european countries go the opposite and the first surname is the mother surname.

 

i think i've been lucky enough to be only child and be raised without those sexist stuff, thought that can't be proved really cause i had no brother so... but my dad cared to teach me male tasks: paint the home, build furniture, electricity, gardening, computers and so.

it bothered me to see my friends and cousins didn't have that, -.and the seem happy that way- i remember be labeled as the feminist female for defending opendly some woman rights.

that said i wish at times i were more girly, i never liked barbies dolls, or dresses much.

i remember once being around 9 and going to a kids clothes shop and the assistant tell me i didn't belong in the boys area. :confused: wtf couldn't i be there looking for some clothes to gift some cousin or something?

I guess in France sexism still exists but I feel like it's really changing. I mean, my parents' generation is still pretty sexist (they're in their 50s) but my generation (I'm 16) seems to go for men/women equality. We don't have the "sandwich jokes" you're all talking about, we're all preparing for a job we like, most of my male friends would like to have kids and take care of them... Men are more and more involved in their children's lives and sharing housekeeping tasks, most of the women have a full-time job...

Still, there are some differences that seem to be really hard to get rid of... Like for the exact same job, with the same diploma, same everything, a man is always going to earn more money than woman... But I think we're getting better :)

I guess in France sexism still exists but I feel like it's really changing. I mean, my parents' generation is still pretty sexist (they're in their 50s) but my generation (I'm 16) seems to go for men/women equality. We don't have the "sandwich jokes" you're all talking about, we're all preparing for a job we like, most of my male friends would like to have kids and take care of them... Men are more and more involved in their children's lives and sharing housekeeping tasks, most of the women have a full-time job...

Still, there are some differences that seem to be really hard to get rid of... Like for the exact same job, with the same diploma, same everything, a man is always going to earn more money than woman... But I think we're getting better :)

Here too, there is the income inequality issue, and I think also one problem is that whoever takes care of the children falls behind economically, and I think the Scandinavian countries do a much better job of helping mothers and their newborns, giving adequate time off, and keeping pay on a more even keel.

I guess what I think is that of unseen value in the economic sphere is the value of strong, healthy families. It's so important, but so underrated, and caregivers in general are underrated and underpaid. The compassionate work, or careers, are at the foundation of society, and people that do that deserve better.

Probably. My mom told me that I can't inherit the more important properties that we have (like the house we live in today), and instead have the ones that aren't that convenient for me -like our rest house in the province which l won't be able to occupy anyway due to the nature of the lifestyle I will have in the future, career-wise. Because my parents already assumed that my future husband is going to take me away with him and live in his house or (eventually) our own house anyway, but still, I'm the eldest child; be it addressed to my younger brother or not, I still am the only one who can be capable of taking over our possessions. He is still years WAY behind me.

 

This is still not their final decision though, this is something all of us yet have to ponder. Even my justifications about this have to be taken into (their) consideration.

char, there doesn't exist the option that all sibilings inherit the property equally?

@Bea: l'm not familiar with the ins and outs of inheriting properties, at the end of the day it will still come from the parents'/benefactors' decision; its just the typical asian parents' way of thinking on their sons being more important/having greater responsibilities than their daughters, hence, my post in this thread.

 

And like l said l don't think that is really gonna happen to me. My parents are aware of my responsibility being the eldest child. We still have to talk about this, to be fair not only to me but to my younger brother as well.

one good example: a girl that makes out with lots of guys is a bitch/whore, a guy who makes out with lots of girls is the boss. Where in hell did this ever make sense?

one good example: a girl that makes out with lots of guys is a bitch/whore, a guy who makes out with lots of girls is the boss. Where in hell did this ever make sense?

 

Funnily enough, it's often girls that call their friends 'sluts'. Why do you even care, I really don't get it.

^I don't care, I just said it was a good example. It never really happened to me. Boys do call sluts and bitch to girls too when they betray their boyfriends for instance. When it happens to be a guy, it's just "ohh poor girl. got betrayed."

^I don't care, I just said it was a good example. It never really happened to me. Boys do call sluts and bitch to girls too when they betray their boyfriends for instance. When it happens to be a guy, it's just "ohh poor girl. got betrayed."

 

Sorry, I didn't mean you personally. I meant those girls who go on about how other girls are acting like sluts.

 

Fair enough if they say it because a girl cheated on her boyfriend. However, there's nothing wrong with it if someone chooses to sleep around if they're single (and being careful). I personally wouldn't do it but it doesn't bother me if other people do.

oh sorry, I misunderstood it :confused: yeah, I really don't care about what the other decides to make with their life, as long as i'm not in. But I see the most of highschool doing this when it happens to someone, and I think it's unfair... i mean, even if you find that slutty (well, it really is) why the boy is always innocent?

^ l agree with your example; its like when the husband cheats on his wife its absolutely horrible, yes, but if the wife does it, it seems worse, you know.

Well I think most people would agree that it's wrong that it's wrong to cheat on your partner regardless of your gender.

 

The problem is that it's often considered socially acceptable for a guy to sleep around but if a girl does the same, she a 'whore'.

one good example: a girl that makes out with lots of guys is a bitch/whore, a guy who makes out with lots of girls is the boss. Where in hell did this ever make sense?

 

Society still seems scared off by female sexuality, this is something that really needs to change

it doesn't mean though that women should be given the privilege of doing the wrong things. just pointing out that one.

I think sexual dimorphism is a part of human nature and human culture, and we have societies structured in such a way that they depend on patterns and roles to function, but there is more flexibility in those relationships than we have experienced on the whole. What it seems to be is role playing and alpha mentalities / hyperindividualism that cause some of the problems, plus group pressures. Greater value needs to be placed on those who have greater sympathy, empathy, and consistency in relating with others.

It seems to me that the real core issue deals with a desire for control over others, to get attention and to try and dominate others, and to jostle for rank in the pecking order in society. The master-slave mentality needs to become a partnership mentality, and more objective assessments for a merit based system, with greater weighting towards how well a person works with others.

While this master-slave mentality is an antiquated way of thinking, old ways are slow to change. Stereotypes are reinforced in the cultural mediums of the day, and from patterns of behavior, and social norms.

So, to change that, be the change you wish to see!;)

^^yes that's right. It's as wrong as if it was a guy, but outside people love to put up a scandal on the girl.

 

I just recalled the case of a mate on my school, she had boyfriend and at some party or whatever she got drunk and made out with a friend (who was drunk too and probably had girlfriend). Even if he didn't have he "knew" at least that she was comitted, and you know both were drunk he's as guilty as her... she was called slut for months on my school by everyone. I mean really everyone, even little kids and people that didn't know her. She was feeling miserable and regretful and he was just like "yeah life's great"... High school classic.

I almost think there is a certain behavior which happens in groups, sort of a sociopathic tendency, where one can use a long standing norm and perpetuate an inequity to dominate another or ostracize one for their actions, while another who is a member of the controlling group gets away with it.

It's as though the ones who scheme the best and know how to mess with the minds of others get away with it, and set up a way to slander the reputation of another well beyond any measure of pointing out what a misdeed calls for. Once the ball gets rolling, it's open season for anyone to take advantage of a weakened person and beat on them as well.

It has truly got to change, it's an inequity that still operates in the unspoken societal patterns and rules.

char, there doesn't exist the option that all sibilings inherit the property equally?

I thought that was the law in most countries?