I was thinking about to make this thread for a long time (sorry if another similar thread already exists).

Basically, you can post here some invented facts about Coldplay (in the vein of the Chuck Norris ones).

I'll start with this:

 

Guy's car is indeed his bass: when you push a secret button, it becomes a limited-edition Batmobile! :D

Joe Satriani decided not to sue Coldplay after Jonny started to play the guitar riff of death. (Which Joe tried to do, but failed) [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_Mv80Aqfcg]guitar riff of death[/ame]

 

There's a rumor that every time you listen to a Coldplay song, something bad in the world jumps back into Pandora's box.

Every time you listen to Coldplay someone's IQ gets higher :lol:

When Popeye eats spinach he becomes stronger.

When Jonny eats cake he can play his guitar so loud that even Chuck Norris couldn't :)

Eating chocolate and listening to Coldplay at the same time is hazardous; you could spontaneously combust from happiness :P

Once Chris mistook a note during a Mozart piece.

Now that piano piece has been corrected and everyone plays it like that :D

Chris Martin's dancing is so epic, they plan on starting up dance classes around the world devoted to his "unique style" of dance. They will be including such moves as "sing while lying on the floor" and "the stun gun, fall on the floor ". ;)

Eugene Delacroix was a Coldplay fan: if you look closely at one of the men lying on the ground you'll notice that he looks exactly like Jonny!

Coldplay's legacy is so great people knew about them in 1492, and Christopher Columbus was acutally sent to the New World (America) because the people of Europe knew Coldplay would need cities to play concerts in later :D

 

EDIT: This is my 200th post! With this account, anyway :D

Douglas Adams actually chose 42 as the answer to life because of Coldplay's song 42. :D

Nobody knows that Will can even play the sitar.......... while playing the drums, the piano, the tin whistle and the stylophone :lol:

^ All at once :laugh3:

^Of course!:D

All of Coldplay's crew are actually robots, and the only human among them is R42, and that's why he blogs, to keep from going insane :D

Coldplay fought the war and won. On penalties.

hahaa some of them are actually really really good :D keep writing .. i enjoy reading :D (no need to mention i am not that creative to come up with this kind of ¨facts¨ )

I really don't get Chuck Norris jokes, therefore I don't get these ones.

If Coldplay were to pump your thumb up to 60+ PSI, they WOULD NOT pierce your partially permeable membrane.

The Opportunity Mars Rover listens to Moving To Mars every day :awesome:

The TV series "Lost" was inspired by the Coldplay song with the same name :P

That Guy is actually a robot.

The roadie Matt McGinn is a Xylobryte (as hinted by the title M.M.I.X.) : they want to send the message "Mylo Xyloto" to his home planet in the Andromeda Galaxy and it actually means: "Please, come to Earth and enjoy our music" :D

^ :laugh3:

BUMP!

 

It seems tha in A Hopefull Transmission there are some subliminal messages: when you listen to it slowed down 167.985% you can clearly hear a voice that says "Thou shalt give all your cake to Jonny!"

Graffiti is a Coldplay invention. They came up with the idea and spread the word so when the moment came they would use it as an album theme and officially control the whole planet.

It is all part of the bands masterplan, if you think about it they first created an army of obssessed fans(Parachutes and AROBTTH), then turned them into robots (X&Y), tought them how to be rebelous (Viva), and now they are making us spraipaint subliminar messages so they can have more power. The MX Tour will actually be their conquering war.