ahhh - this is so we can talk to each other without me having to think up something about the next poster :D . anyone welcome - BE NICE!! ;)

yes! I'm the best! lol and I'm first!!!

it just flowed better that way - don't cop an attitude with me eric or i will evict you!! :P

just kidding... i hope you know. isn't this easier??

lol are u copying bobolamarianaa and jomifika-watever...? :sneaky:

i know... i didn't have the brain power to come up with something original, so i just looted that idea ;)

much better... except the whole copping an attitude thing :P

ok ok - i'm sorry :cry:

*edit* I mean... aww... don't be sorry

alright - eric i need an honest opinion about a situation with my son. you seem very reasonable and intelligent, and i am just trying to get a lot of input on this. it will take me a couple minutes to type up the situation - ok?

I'm right here. I'll be glad to help you out.

ok - my little boy, christopher will be 4 on october 31st. he is an extremely intelligent child - almost scary-smart. i discovered at the age of 2, he had a freakish aptitude for playing the piano, so i started him in lessons at a local music store. well, he is like some kind of little virtuoso... he can read extremely complex music, play all the classic pieces extremely well, etc. his music teacher mentioned awhile back about sending a video of him to someone in new york who works with gifted children, and i agreed to that. well yesterday, i got this letter inviting him to attend a private academy for very young children to "cultivate" his talent.

 

i called the person at the academy and asked several questions - but i just don't know if i can let this happen. on one hand, i don't want him to grow up and hate that he missed such an opportunity... on the other hand, i don't want him to be separated from family (ME) for long periods of time.

 

i keep thinking of that movie "little man tate" and how depressed that kid was. i don't want him to be an oddball. right now, he is funny, silly, outgoing, and is really happy. it is really hard for me or my family to be objective about this... and just as hard for his piano teacher and the person from the school. so i am trying to get some true unbiased opinions. i really don't want to mess this up.

ok - my little boy, christopher will be 4 on october 31st. he is an extremely intelligent child - almost scary-smart. i discovered at the age of 2, he had a freakish aptitude for playing the piano, so i started him in lessons at a local music store. well, he is like some kind of little virtuoso... he can read extremely complex music, play all the classic pieces extremely well, etc. his music teacher mentioned awhile back about sending a video of him to someone in new york who works with gifted children, and i agreed to that. well yesterday, i got this letter inviting him to attend a private academy for very young children to "cultivate" his talent.

 

i called the person at the academy and asked several questions - but i just don't know if i can let this happen. on one hand, i don't want him to grow up and hate that he missed such an opportunity... on the other hand, i don't want him to be separated from family (ME) for long periods of time.

 

i keep thinking of that movie "little man tate" and how depressed that kid was. i don't want him to be an oddball. right now, he is funny, silly, outgoing, and is really happy. it is really hard for me or my family to be objective about this... and just as hard for his piano teacher and the person from the school. so i am trying to get some true unbiased opinions. i really don't want to mess this up.

First of all, that is a great problem to have. That's awesome.

Also, how long would he be gone from you compared to being at a regular school and are their any other possible in between options.

Being away from your child can be hard, but I believe that your biggest concern is will this change his behavior negatively in any way (by being away from mom and with a bunch of kids). I'm going to guess that the kids aren't brats though, in which case I think you should let him go. But if he's gone for like a year without seeing you at all now that would be something different altogether.

yeah, i am definitely NOT complaining...

it is set up like a college year. long summer break, holidays, etc. he would have a 5 hour school day with a lot of one-on one tutoring in the regular subjects (btw, he is also quite gifted in reading, math, and geography). then there would be music lessons for up to 3 to 4 hours a day. the lady said it depends on the child's level of individual desire.

 

i would move and be there with him, but i have a contract with a pharmaceutical company that runs through 2008 to work on a clinical trial - and i have to stay at the place where it is being conducted. if i quit, i would lose a huge signing bonus and basically shoot my career to hell...

yeah, i am definitely NOT complaining...

it is set up like a college year. long summer break, holidays, etc. he would have a 5 hour school day with a lot of one-on one tutoring in the regular subjects (btw, he is also quite gifted in reading, math, and geography). then there would be music lessons for up to 3 to 4 hours a day. the lady said it depends on the child's level of individual desire.

 

i would move and be there with him, but i have a contract with a pharmaceutical company that runs through 2008 to work on a clinical trial - and i have to stay at the place where it is being conducted. if i quit, i would lose a huge signing bonus and basically shoot my career to hell...

Well, it is a good problem to have, but of course it does have some major negatives to it. however, even if you weren't able to find a job that you liked as well, as long as you like the job, whether or not you're paid as much, I'm sure you will be much happier in the long run. Do you think you'll be able to find a job that is about the same there?

 

I personally think that sounds absolutely wonderful.

yeah - but i spent the signing bonus on my HOUSE... so losing it would pretty much be a financial disaster for me. i HATE money!! :angry:

yipes. I hope you get some back from equity... That's a big sacrifice but if you think about it would you rather have a bigger house or an extremely talented son when he's older?

the timing is just horrible - and YES, i am being selfish. my selfishness is twofold:

1. i don't want him to grow up socially inept

2. i hate to see him grow up so fast. he is so sweet, and this is just really

hard for me to swallow...

I wouldn't think he would grow up to be socially inept, but that's just my opinion really I have no idea. You are so lucky. Maybe one day he'll write some beautiful songs. That would be more than worth it. I'm so freaking jealous

thank you for your opinions - i knew you would be honest with me. i am just going to have to think about this a lot. i can't help but feel that i could delay this for a couple years and he will still be just as brilliant. i just don't want to miss anything with him. he is just the coolest little kid ever!!

immediately when you told me your situation I thought about Samuel in the Bible and what kind of person he grew up to be. His mother wanted a child so badly and was willing to give him to God if she could just have a child and he was a great man. With the right counselors and friends your son can be a great instrumentalist and grow up to be a fine person.

i know :cry: -- it is just difficult. even though you have been kind enough not to ask, my husband died in a car wreck almost two years ago... so you can imagine that makes the bond with my son that much deeper. i don't think i use him to cope, but we are just like a team taking on the world. it is hard to change that. we live in such an ideal place, and my family is all close to where we are... change is hard.

Wow Christi, I am so sorry to hear that *hug* you sound like a great mom. I am 100% serious, your child is very unlucky, but so so very lucky

Just... wow. I can't help, really, because I'm not experienced enough...

 

But wow.

thanks for the support. i think that christopher has adjusted amazingly well. he is such a happy little kid. my dad spends a lot of time with him, and i have 2 brothers, age 13, and 19, that are great with him too - so that helps a lot that he has good male role models in his life.

 

do you think this opportunity has a short window? will he lose something if i maintain the status quo for a couple years? i am already planning on increasing his lessons to 4 times a week, and he is excited about that. i haven't told him about this academy thing yet...