I am pretty sure I need LP5 in the next 3 months. The suspense is dreadful. I have a feeling it will be sensational.

May 13, 2011 - submitted by Agnes, Sweden

 

Q. TEAM ORACLE QUESTION - #24

"After 6 months together, my ex dumped me horribly and kind of by mistake on our 6 month anniversary. A long, confusing and heartbreaking summer followed, but since we sort of broke up for no reason, and he's in my class, we still had feelings and started seeing each other again this fall. I want him back more than anything in the world, but he doesn't want to commit even though he tells me he still likes me. He says he can't be in a relationship "right now", but the thing is, he's told me the same thing since October. Am I on the hook? Do I wait for him? What on earth do I do, I am miserable without him, yet this is not what I truly want. Agnes."

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

I'm sorry Agnes but he's using you. I'm not sure how you dump someone by mistake though people do break up for seemingly no reason. I'd argue there is a reason, you just haven't been let in on what it is. Sorry guys but boys are sometimes cowards and would rather say nothing. Whether you have feelings for each other is regardless to me as all I care about it how you want to be treated. Yes, you are on the hook but you've put yourself on it. Ask yourself if you're getting a good deal here. He's keeping his options open by not committing but he told you he doesn't want a relationship, so it's down to you. If as you say this is not what you truly want, get off the hook. Please don't wait for him. Don't think by still seeing him he's going to change his mind and commit. The other thing I will say and I am so sorry to be blunt but it's for the best... it may be true that he can't be in a relationship "right now" but what if he means he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you right now? What will happen if he gets a new girlfriend? The message you're sending him is that it's ok to treat you like this and so it will continue. Grab your self-respect and walk away. If he comes back so be it but for now, let him get his head straight on his own and you do the same.

Above all else remember this Agnes; there is NOTHING wrong with you. This is about him NOT you and you deserve better. You can be sad it's over but don't be miserable without him as you can and will do a whole lot better than this situation. I guarantee that.

Over to you...

 

You might be surprised to know this, but I think the solution to your dilemma lies in your question: "What on earth do I do, I am miserable without him, yet this is not what I truly want." As hard as it seems to have to let go, your best option at this point is to move on because it is clear that this is not what you truly want. In this instance, you should be selfish about your own happiness and concentrate on what it is you do want because waiting for him or continuing to pursue a relationship with him will only cause you further confusion and heartache. You deserve someone who will commit to you and will treat you with respect, not drag your feelings out. Best of luck to you! Danielle.

 

I'm sorry to hear about what happened between you and ex. Believe it or not I'm in the exact same position as you, and yes it can be very depressing and lonely without your "significant other" but always keep hope. Give it some time and he'll come around. For now just surround yourself with friends and occupy your time. But when he's ready to talk, try to work things out. I wish the best for you. Billy N.

 

You already tried asking him about the situation. Why don't you tell him you've tried your best and that you want to know if he ever wants to be in a relationship again. It might be hard, but waiting for an answer you won't get is probably worse. If he doesn't want to tell you what's going on he doesn't care about you and you deserve someone better. I hope I could help, give it your best. Lisette.

 

I'm a 46 married woman in Ohio. My husband lives in California.

My life right now is waiting.

My husband doesn't want to give up drinking "just now".

Will you and I go crazy thinking about what could happen, what might turn things around? We will, in all likelihood, make those around us crazy for not letting go. for not severing the relationship completely.

We have a commonality: we see the best potential in the objects of our affection. Maybe we deserve to have someone throw a glass of cold water on us with the admonition "wake up already!"

Maybe we have a moment of clarity when we stand back and advise another person on the same issue we are personally going through.

I don't think that you will see this, but it has brought some new clarity to me. I am going to step away. There's life out there for me, for you, RIGHT NOW. There's NO need for us to wait for that one special person who may or may not ever come to a course of action either of us might actually prefer. Best of luck to you. Holly.

 

What I am going to tell you is a very well known phrase: LET IT BE. Yes, as The Beatles said 41 years ago. But it is still one of the wisest phrases I know. I guess that you're thinking of him all the time, but you have to clear up your mind, focus and relax. If you really love him, wait for him.. But also, let him know that you are valuable. Don't ever put him under pressure to make a decision 'cause that won't help at all. What ever happen you should know that it has got a reason, and life wants it to be like that, and also that there's something you should learn from all this experience. Do not regret the time you spent with him and do not get sad because it has ended, just feel happy because it happened and you enjoyed it. Give time to time, 'cause he knows what to do, trust me. I hope that my advices have been useful and now go out and enjoy with your friends, or stay at home eating chocolate and listening to Coldplay. My best wishes for you, Gina.

 

I have been in a similar situation myself. My girlfriend and I had broken up for seemingly no reason. We saw each other constantly and we were both upset without the other, but I was very much afraid to get back together into a relationship. We both had very strong feelings for each other but we weren't sure what to do. A few months later I finally came to the realization that even though being in a long term committed relationship was a bit frightening, I cared about her too much to just let her go; so i asked her out and we started dating again. I think it is important to ask him if he is hesitating because he is afraid. Relationships require give and take, part of that give is to go into the relationship even if you are afraid, so that you can make each other's live more amazing than they are separately. True love my sting you sometimes but you'll miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Caleb.

 

Well, I would say carry on regardless! I'm still with my partner and soul mate of ten years, we have two beautiful children, and we met and broke up for some time in the 'early years'. Just because you broke up it doesn't mean its over for ever! Enjoy each other, don't be heavy and what will be will almost certainly be. Helen.

 

When someone is not "ready" to commit or be in a relationship means they are on the fence about you. I understand the feelings of being miserable without this person, but you are sacrificing your own self worth in order to be with someone when they finally decide to come around. If you do get back together, your ex will not view you with the same respect knowing that you put your life on hold until he was ready. Speaking from a long line of heart breaks and aches, I thought my world would end and I could not go on living without my ex. We've been broken up for a year now and in retrospect, what was I thinking? Why did I try so hard for something and become malleable to someone who would not reciprocate these efforts. I thought I loved him but I confused that with rejection and wanting acceptance. Ask yourself if this person is someone who you want in your life because if he can live without you and risk losing you to someone else in the interim..actions speak louder than words. Larina.

 

No. You should not wait for him. If he was really worth waiting for, then go ahead. But it doesn't seem like he is. Lizbeth.

 

Keep on seeing him a little more but while you do that, think about seeing other people, too! Think there are lots of fish in the sea and spend some time finding out bad things about him. He doesn't like you the way you like him cause if he did, he would feel like you do! He's probably with you cause he doesn't have anyone else to be with (men are like this). You're such a nice girl, you sounded so sweet, gotta be with someone who appreciates that! Stop listening to your heart and listen to this little voice saying you deserve more than what he can give you! Adriano.

 

I read your story and trust me, I couldn't understand more because I used to do the very same thing as he did. Me and your ex do the same thing here, we said we cant do it NOW, perhaps one day and we don't want to love anyone yet. Now, after 10 months, my ex just found someone that she thinks much better than me. I'm like "dear god, does she really moved on??" People said "they don't know what do they have until its gone", but for me its totally a crap, because the truth is they know exactly what they have at every moment. They know it, just they don't expect them to leave!! He don't expect of losing you. and you know what, he feels secured right now. so, if you want him back, trust me, you gotta make he feels threatened. if you keep chasing him everyday, texting him, write on his wall, it will just makes he feels like "at least i have someone I could choose in case I have nobody else". because what does he feels right now is nothing more than EGO. and nobody knows how strong his ego would be. People said "waiting never be worthless if what you waiting for is priceless". A person you really love just come once in your life, even you had thousands of dates before, there will be only one you are dying to fight for, but when you got it, you are the queen of the world Agnes. Believe me. Keim.

 

I'm sorta surprise with your story because it seems similar to what happened to me. Broke up with my "ex-boyfriend" after six months of being together because he didn't want to commit and be my boyfriend for real, my story with him had no basis at all, and I couldn't wait any longer, sadly it was too late, cause I really was in love with him. It was on December and I had an empty summer too (I live in South America). Tried to reach him, but it was me all the time, not him. We saw again later, and he was this doubtful again, even if he "wanted to be with me" he didn't want to commit. In the end, a "doubt" is always a "no" answer. So I waited and he didn't cared. Try to keep on with your life, 'cause if he haven't come back seriously till now, he'll never do. I already lost 16 months. Even if you love him, you gotta love yourself too. You'll suffer, true. But you'll recover slowly. He'll keep on with his life and you gotta be on that too so to not get hurt when you look back at him. Kind regards, June.

 

1. If he does not want a serious commitment he has a motive. 2. To be honest with him and explain what YOU really want, but should not expect if the response is negative, give yourself a time and distract your mind with other things. Flavia.

 

 

Thank you all so much for your replies. Great to see new contributors.

Click to read this week's Team Oracle question, and send us your answer.

May 11, 2011 - submitted by Madison, United States of America[/color][/b]

 

Q. Hello Awesome Oracle,

I was just wondering, out of curiousity, what your 5 favorite bands are right now?

Thanks a million, Madison

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

Other than Coldplay? I'm going to answer this solely on the albums by bands (as you were specific) I have been listening to most recently:

Beastie Boys - their new album, Hot Sauce Committee Part Two, is amazing.

The Temper Trap - Conditions still standing strong in my favourites.

Foo Fighters - I like their new album but still listening to Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace regularly to be honest.

Radiohead - King of Limbs isn't my favourite (OK Computer is), but it's still nice to have new Radiohead material.

Elbow - Build a Rocket Boys! is a great successor to their favourite of mine.

 

Aahahahaha this is my question :D I literally died when I saw my name on there

I literally died

Abuse of terminology that makes me cringe.

 

 

But congratulations on getting answered! :awesome:

Abuse of terminology that makes me cringe.

 

or maybe she's posting from beyond the grave... :blank:

Abuse of terminology that makes me cringe.

 

 

But congratulations on getting answered! :awesome:

 

I know right? It just completely takes all meaning away from the word. People should say "figuratively" instead...it's more honest.

Ahhhh... sorry....

Imma Zombie :awesome:

Ahhhh... sorry....

Imma Zombie :awesome:

 

*has the urge to post a certain Your Favorite Martian video*

*has the urge to post a certain Your Favorite Martian video*

 

Hahahahahaha! :D

But seriously, I will eat your brains.

Hahahahahaha! :D

But seriously, I will eat your brains.

 

NOOO! I HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!!! wait. i can still do those things as a zombie right?

NOOO! I HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!!! wait. i can still do those things as a zombie right?

 

Quite possibly, yes

Quite possibly, yes

 

WOOT!:D

WOOT!:D

 

:laugh3:

You just wont have any brains...

:laugh3:

You just wont have any brains...

 

Crap! Can't go to college or get a job.:cry:

May 16, 2011 - submitted by Tyler, United States of America

 

Q. In the intro in the Roadie book, it says that the band is currently working on a biography. Is this true? If so, how is it coming along?

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

"They're working on it" is news to me. They're not working on it as they're way too busy working on the album. There was almost one in the pipeline a few years ago but it's not even on the back burner; it's way further back than that.

May 16, 2011 - submitted by Lois, Australia

 

Q. Dear Oracle,

I remember seeing a little while ago a question I believe asking if there were any pictures of Coldplay on train tracks. There was a link to a website on it that had some beautiful pictures of the band, but I can no longer find the question or the link. Would you be able to tell me the link? If not, would you be able to suggest some other beautiful pictures of the band perhaps?

 

Thank you :)

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

Yes, here they are.

May 17, 2011 - submitted by Eduardo, Mexico

 

Q. Hola!

 

I just watched the What We Are video and I can say it is a little pesimist.

I know we have big issues in our actual world, and that a lot of people just make those issues bigger, but don't you think that there are a lot more of us who are trying to make a change? The video also talks about us having a Great Potential, but in the end it just says that we are "animals" (I'm not denying that biologicaly talking) who donnot are making anything to change the situation. Well, those are my thoughts, what do you think?

 

Saludos desde Mexico!

 

Lalo

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

Oh you mean on the Hypnofeed, I was wondering what Coldplay song you were referring to. It's good that the video made you think, that's sort of the point I guess. Either the video maker is very cynical or they may have a point. What I think is that as long as people like you are watching it and disagreeing, there's hope for the future eh?

May 17, 2011 - submitted by Daniel, United States of America

 

Q. Dear Oracle,

 

You mentioned in a recent post that you're not a Bob Dylan fan. I was just wondering why not, musically, and is there a Dylan song that you do enjoy?

 

Sincerely,

Dan

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

He's got soma amazing songs, I can't argue with that but I find his vocal style very irritating and not to my taste. That is all. I may be alone in that but hey, I embrace those difference of opinions.

May 17, 2011 - submitted by Sam, United Kingdom

 

Q. Hello Oracle,

Last year I purchased a copy of LeftRightLeftRightLeft off of Ebay. When I was looking at the CD recently I noticed it says http://www.takt.eu on the bottom side around the centre. Does this make it a fake? If it is it's a very good one because it's taken me a year to notice it!!!

Thanks for your time!

Sam

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

Mine says http://www.takt.eu on the flip side's centre too and I assure you mine is not a fake so chances are yours isn't either.

thank you as always Natascha!

thank you as always Natascha!

 

:nice:

May 18, 2011 - submitted by Fran, Croatia

 

Q. I heard that Michael H. Brauner, the man who produced Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends is also producing the new Coldplay album. Is this true?

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

His name is Brauer, not Brauner and he didn't produce Viva nor is he producing this album. I discussed producers last week. What you've done is mistaken mixing for production; Michael is mixing tracks on the album.

Production on Viva was by Brian Eno, Markus Dravs, Rik Simpson and Jon Hopkins.

May 18, 2011 - submitted by Brooke, United States of America

 

Q. Dear Oracle,

Do you have any clue who this drawing is supposed to be of?

 

 

The Oracle replies:

 

It's strange sometimes how questions come in. I don't recall ever getting a question about Michael Brauer and then I receive two in the same day!

 

I'd be tempted to guess that the doodle is actually of Michael and that's why he chose it for his gallery.

Chris has a habit of drawing and writing on the nearest thing to him be it a table or an Apple mac! Please don't try this at home.

It's strange sometimes how questions come in. I don't recall ever getting a question about Michael Brauer and then I receive two in the same day!

 

Maybe because of this? :sneaky:

this[/url]? :sneaky:

 

 

LOL - Mr. locust7 has done it again....He's very well informed.