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Braddock's Jokes Thread

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A thread for people to post jokes they have heard (no matter how offensive).

Ok, I'll kick us off

 

 

A seal walks into a club

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  • Author

at this point i was going to post a picture of a seal being clubbed but i don't think i could

is this a canadian joke??!

I know one about british. I don't if it's sounds funny but in lithuanian it is

 

 

Oh, every path points to the sea, damn island

  • Author

what's the most offensive joke you guys know?

obviously the one i started with wasn't the most offensive one i know, but i figured we'd start off slow.

 

i don't know if i could say mine on here.

(dead baby jokes don't count because they've lost all meaning and are too predictable)

HAHAHAAHHAHAH that was funny.

And a bit sad.

  • Author

I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

A thread for people to post jokes they have heard (no matter how offensive).

Ok, I'll kick us off

 

 

A seal walks into a club

 

So Morrisey decides he is going to boycott touring in Canada.

what's the most offensive joke you guys know?

obviously the one i started with wasn't the most offensive one i know, but i figured we'd start off slow.

 

i don't know if i could say mine on here.

(dead baby jokes don't count because they've lost all meaning and are too predictable)

 

I'll make one! :blush:

 

What do you call a ******?

 

Dirty.

This is one of my friend's favorite jokes:

 

 

Why can't Helen Keller read?

 

Because she's a woman.

 

 

Oh sexism, it's wrong but we laugh anyway

  • Author

what kind of bees make milk?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

boo bees

i dunno, but i'm steering clear

 

LULZ OKAY.

 

 

 

Once upon a time, there lived a rabbit. And it died. :blank:

  • Author

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic whose drinking problem is destroying his family.

  • Author

Two whales are sitting at a bar.

 

The first whale says, "ooooooouuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaoooooooouuuu uuuuuuuuooooouuuaaa.......

 

ooooooouuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuooooouuuaaaaaaaaa a.....

 

ooooooOOOOuuuuAAAAAAAAAAAUUUuuuuaaaa...."

 

and the second whale says, "Dude, you are so wasted."

  • Author

This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker/indicator worked.

 

She stuck her head out and said, 'Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes...'

  • Author

A woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre, so the barman gave her one

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