Braddock's Jokes Thread

[EmmaLouiseSmyth]

two dragons in a pub

one says 'christ, it's hot in here'

the other replies 'shut your mouth!'

 

Jimmy Carr :heart:

 

Ive never understood how anyone could find ultra offensive jokes funny??? I think the only joke ive ever laughed at was;

 

How do you confuse an Irishman, Show him into a round room and tell him to stand in the corner.

 

:o I am so offended....

but not at all,

that joke can work with any nationality :wacko:

[christopher Martin]

Jimmy Carr :heart:

 

 

 

:o I am so offended....

but not at all,

that joke can work with any nationality :wacko:

 

I knew an Irish person would say that, which is why i said ultra offensive jokes. Things like racism, dead babies, twin towers, etc

[Prospekt.]

Why couldn't the blind black guy read?

 

Cause he was black.

[EmmaLouiseSmyth]

I knew an Irish person would say that, which is why i said ultra offensive jokes.

 

 

. oh okay :nice:

[hotdensestate]

Told this bajillions of times, but:

 

Why does Mexico have no Olympic team?

 

 

Anyone who can run, swim, or jump has already left the country.

I knew an Irish person would say that, which is why i said ultra offensive jokes. Things like racism, dead babies, twin towers, etc

 

Loosen up. Laughing at stuff makes it less bad.

[Mrs.Chatterbox]

Told this bajillions of times, but:

 

Why does Mexico have no Olympic team?

 

 

Anyone who can run, swim, or jump has already left the country.

 

 

Loosen up. Laughing at stuff makes it less bad.

 

:laugh3::laugh3::laugh3::lol:

[ricardo]

Told this bajillions of times, but:

 

Why does Mexico have no Olympic team?

 

 

Anyone who can run, swim, or jump has already left the country.

 

 

Loosen up. Laughing at stuff makes it less bad.

 

Haha good one, but I had already heard it.

Wanna hear a nasty sexist one?

[christopher Martin]

]

 

Loosen up. Laughing at stuff makes it less bad.

 

Yeh ok when somebody you know dies ill make a joke about it, lets see if it makes it less bad

[hotdensestate]

Yeh ok when somebody you know dies ill make a joke about it, lets see if it makes it less bad

 

Yeah, it will, actually.

 

Haha good one, but I had already heard it.

Wanna hear a nasty sexist one?

 

Fire away :cheesy:

[pickle]

these are so :awesome:

 

Haha good one, but I had already heard it.

Wanna hear a nasty sexist one?

 

DO EHT

[EmmaLouiseSmyth]

:lol: i think sexist ones are great,

hopefully you weren't going to post this one :uhoh:

 

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car?

 

cause she was a woman.

 

[Prospekt.]

Yeh ok when somebody you know dies ill make a joke about it, lets see if it makes it less bad

 

How do you feel about Chris Martin's "famous impression of a disabled"?

[ricardo]

ok

I warn you it's nasteh and sexist lol

 

 

Up to which number can women count?

68 because at 69 their mouth is full

 

[hotdensestate]

How do you feel about Chris Martin's "famous impression of a disabled"?

 

He did wut naow? XD

 

ok

I warn you it's nasteh and sexist lol

 

 

Up to which number can women count?

68 because at 69 their mouth is full

 

It's the same for guys you fuckwit.

[ricardo]

lolz reckon it's funny I told ya you were going to get angry

[christopher Martin]

Yeah, it will, actually.

 

...............ok you win

[Prospekt.]

He did wut naow? XD

 

 

 

It's the same for guys you fuckwit.

 

He didn't actually do it but Ricky Gervais asked him about it.

 

 

And it's not really the same cause the guys mouth isn't really full. Like he could still say a muffled "69"

[ricardo]

Now here's a nasteh female chauvinist joke to balance things, but it's gonna be hard to tell:

 

Why do women suck at parking?

because men tell them this ------------------------------------ (suppose I'm measuring like 12 inches or 30 cm) is equal to one yard/merter

 

[christopher Martin]

How do you feel about Chris Martin's "famous impression of a disabled"?

 

Lmao he doesnt have one, you must be able to realise that Ricky is just trying to make chris uncomfortable?

[Prospekt.]

I thought you'd be too stupid to tell. Btw, Ricky's voice is clearly dubbed at that part.

[hotdensestate]

lolz reckon it's funny I told ya you were going to get angry

 

I'm only angry because I was expecting a funny joke but I got a guy who doesn't understand basic sex position lingo.

He didn't actually do it but Ricky Gervais asked him about it.

 

 

And it's not really the same cause the guys mouth isn't really full. Like he could still say a muffled "69"

 

Hm, you make a good point. Ricardo's joke is officially "eh", instead of "fuckwitted". :nice:

[ricardo]

See? Admit it's a good one.

[Prince Myshkin]

Yeh ok when somebody you know dies ill make a joke about it, lets see if it makes it less bad

i have always been of the opinion that you should be able to laugh at anything

i tell paedophile jokes and i was sexually abused as a child (not by anybody in my family - i say that just in case i ever say anything about my family on here and you automatically think that they are awful)

 

i'd like to think i'd be able to find a little bit of humour in my mother's death. it's what she would want

[christopher Martin]

I thought you'd be too stupid to tell. Btw, Ricky's voice is clearly dubbed at that part.

 

How could anyone possibly be that stupid, you would have to have aspergers or something to not be able to read the situation. I dont recall his voice being dubbed though? why would it be dubbed?

[Prince Myshkin]

He didn't actually do it but Ricky Gervais asked him about it.

 

 

And it's not really the same cause the guys mouth isn't really full. Like he could still say a muffled "69"

 

two gay guys silly