Ambergris Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Someone of your same sex declares, out of nowhere, a strong affection to you? I mean, that they're really attracted to you. That could be your friend, acquaintance, someone you've known for a while... But you obviously never expected that from them. I'm so curious, that I added a poll... :blank: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empily Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Who are you admitting your undying love to then? :charming: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prince Myshkin Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 It's happened to me before. I just said I was flattered but I was straight. Nothing changed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chloe_Martin Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 This happened to me too, It was really odd because I'm only a teenager I just told my friend that I didnt swing that way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoebeo Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 I would freak out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ambergris Posted March 30, 2011 Author Share Posted March 30, 2011 Who are you admitting your undying love to then? :charming: Not really. I made this thread because it also happened to me, with a friend of mine (some weeks ago). But I don't think I handled the situation well... I felt incredibly awkward. And I've been feeling like it just ruined the friendship (or at least in regards to my attitude). But, what are you supposed to say then? like... omg, that's great! :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chloe_Martin Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 You have to talk to the person that confessed to you then and sort things out I know it will be very awkward but its worth getting it all out of the way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empily Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 I would find it awkward :lol: About the same awkwardness as if a person of the opposite sex whom I despised asked me out :thinking: But I won't lie, I'd also find it incredibly flattering too :awesome: I would maybe try to act light hearted and not be like UBBER DISGUST OMFG GET AWAY D: and sort of appreciate the fact that it's maybe taken that person a lot of guts to confess to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ambergris Posted March 30, 2011 Author Share Posted March 30, 2011 You have to talk to the person that confessed to you then and sort things out I know it will be very awkward but its worth getting it all out of the way I know, All's been getting back to normality, I believe... But still, I think it must really suck for people that confess their love to their friends and it just can't be requited. :blank: It brings to my head the stories of Christian Andersen, García Lorca or even Tchaikovsky, whose secret love for other men might not always be fulfilled causing them pain. Now curiously the "flattered" option is winning. :awesome: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bright Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 It hasnt happened to me but the thing is that my friends and I are very open with "love stuff" and we talk about it a lot from time to time, simply because we're curious about how the other people feel. At the same time it'd be more awkward if a close friend declared the love for me than if someone I didnt know well did it, not because the person would be gay but becuase it was a close friend. It'd be weird if a guy friend did it too if I didnt feel the same way. I voted for "combination of both" but I wouldnt get upset, I'd just feel a bit weird about it so I should have picked "flatteing" instead :thinking:. Not really. I made this thread because it also happened to me, with a friend of mine (some weeks ago). But I don't think I handled the situation well... I felt incredibly awkward. And I've been feeling like it just ruined the friendship (or at least in regards to my attitude). But, what are you supposed to say then? like... omg, that's great! :confused: Haha dont say it's "GREAT :awesome:" if you dont think so. Just tell them that you're not into guys but that you still want to be their friend. Maybe it's you who feel that it ruined the friendship because the other guy is gay and you feel weird about it. If you could get over that maybe your friendship could be saved. Just guessing :bomb: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Cadet Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Hey, someone likes you. What's not flattering about that? :shrug: I guess I would react to it the same way I would react if one of my good guy friends who I care about dearly but in an entirely platonic way said the same out of the blue. I'd try to pull my head together so I wouldn't say anything to stupid, and I would talk to them about it. Say how flattered I am and how much I do care about them and value their friendship, but explain that a romantic relationship isn't an option for us. It takes a lot of guts to confess something like that. At the same time, if it was a girl who I was close to and I really truly had no idea that they even went that way, yeah that would be really awkward. I guess I would probably be a bit confused and hurt that they felt that they hadn't been able to trust me up to that point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NumbersGirl Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Personally I would be flattered, but I would just have to explain to them, "hey I'm flattered, but I just don't swing that way, sorry." It has probably taken the person a long time to build up the courage to even let you know, so you have to respect that. And the person probably went into the conversation hoping that it wouldn't change your friendship if you turned them down... so going into it they likely prepared themself mentally for the possibility that you would say no. I'm curious... did you already know that the person was attracted members of the same sex, or did that revelation come as an utter surprise to you also? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Violet Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Honestly, I'd probably be more upset that I couldn't get guys to see me that way than flattered that a girl did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reilly Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Well it depends, if it's someone I don't know well, I wouldn't care (and haven't in the past), in fact even if a girl I wasn't attracted to thought I'm good looking I still wouldn't care, I guess its nicer then being called ugly? That's the positive? I voted 'upset' because I didn't read the thread carefully enough, I should have gone for a combination. I just picked up on 'close friend', if they are really attracted to you, like they feel in love, then I'd be upset for them, in a way I'd feel sorry that they let their emotions get so out of control that they love someone they know nothing can happen with, but it'd be terrible for them, and as their friend I'd really feel bad for them. Then you'd need a bit of time and space, and that's not in a homophobic "in case the weirdo tries to bum me when we're alone" kinda way, but it works the same for heterosexuals, for example if you're in a relationship and have a close friend who just comes out with it that they really like you. You don't just hang around again as if nothing happened, because then nothings changed and they're going to just draw themselves in more and more, they need some time to get their head straight and get over it, but this situation whether between same sex or not, can ruin friendships. I find it weird the knee-jerk reaction seems to be that everyones flattered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a_face_of_light Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 If I found them attractive and I was single suggest taking it to the bedroom I expect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cobalt Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Cool. If I like them enough, hookup tiem!! Although I'd be worried for them if they were like really REALLY 'zomg I LARVS U' sorta state, and wouldn't do anything with them, because that would just encourage it. If I didn't like them too much I'd feel a bit bad for them. I know too much what unrequited feelings are like :blank: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crests Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 I actually wouldn't be all that surprised for some reason, but probably a mixture of the two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cobalt Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Hm, but now that I think about it, I might also be a bit upset too... those are due to more selfish reasons though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prince Myshkin Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 If it was one of my best friends our relationship would change, but it'd still work, providing they were happy with just being friends. I would be surprised as hell though, since I'm sure I know all my best friends' sexualities. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivet Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 if i was single and they were cute i'd go for it :charming: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a_face_of_light Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 if i was single and they were cute i'd go for it :charming: I beat you to that answer:P. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prince Myshkin Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Anyone who is already into the same sex, what if they knew you were gay, but a guy friend went for you? That could be more weird, since if you're out, that's a statement. If you're not out, you could be either way behind closed doors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a_face_of_light Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Anyone who is already into the same sex, what if they knew you were gay, but a guy friend went for you? That could be more weird, since if you're out, that's a statement. If you're not out, you could be either way behind closed doors. I've had a few lame drunken advances from guy friends but they wern't actually serious about, them just messing around.If a guy friend was serious I would find it very awkward, I wouldn't be angry or upset with them just I would feel very uncomfortable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the_gloaming09 Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 I think I'd be flattered at first, just to have someone show they like me, but I think unfortunately it would be very awkward afterwards. It's not really the same thing but I went to school and there was this woman who (was quite older...haha), and I got along with because we shared the same interests, but basically she admitted she had strong feelings for me, which of course I didn't have back. Needless to say it was pretty awkward from then on and the friendship was ended (mainly by me, because overtime I found her to be creepy). I think it'd be difficult regardless of the sex just because if you're already established as friends so trying to move things onto a relationship territory makes it more complex, ESPECIALLY if the feelings are not mutual. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destrokk Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 I would be like, no way :surprised: I'm so pretty, even girls like me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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