On a more serious note, I agree with the general consensus that I don't understand the whole double standard where women can compliment each other, but men can't. It's the same thing, and either way it doesn't say anything about your sexual orientation.

 

I also agree with Diana in that sexism goes both ways. There are things that people say about women that aren't necessarily true (e.g. Women should clean the house, take care of the kids, and stay in the kitchen prepared to make sammiches), and the same goes with men (e.g. Hetero men must be as macho as humanly possible). I can't help but think society would at least be a little bit better once we learn to drop some of these societal stereotypes.

This thread is so Guy.

There's nothing wrong with complimenting a person of the same gender as your own. If people think it's a problem, it's their problem.

 

i.e. If someone thinks you're gay/lesbian, who cares. They're obviously not someone worth the time and effort to even worry about how they perceive your sexuality.

I thought of a lot but basically all of them came under a blanket term of "women are allowed to adopt masculine and feminine traits with pride but men can be scrutinized for doing the same"

I can wear make-up and a pink dress if I chose to, then a suit with dress shoes the next day if I chose to

Women who are dominant in relationships are seen as cool but men who are submissive aren't

 

Like we just said, there's more of a pressure, really more of a sick paranoia, to come off as heterosexual as possible

 

Uhh if parents get divorced the mother pretty much always gets the custody

 

In family sitcoms/commercials etc. fathers are portrayed as idiots who can't get the stove open and the wife laughs at him and does it for him

 

I can cry to get away with things sometimes uhh :anxious:

 

Men feel shame for small penis size but women feel a significantly lesser amount of worry for having small breasts... or a shallower vagina? Is that even a thing?? It's really not!

 

Nobody opens doors specifically for men etc. (well really nobody does chivalrous things in general anymore, I just open doors for anyone who's nearby, but I've seen it here and here so)

 

Just some that came from the top of my head

And these are all general statements, I'm not gonna edit every single sentence out to say "SOME men" "SOME women" you know what I mean

 

yeah tbh the only problem guys have is their low self esteem and to be as no homo as possible, while women, even if they have a lot of confidence still arent given the same privileges as men. but i can see that men also have their problems :,( weep weep.

All you have to do is say "No homo" after and guys generally are okay with it.

 

dith

What does dith mean?

i think he has a lisp

The French call it a hair on the tongue.

I don't like that.

 

edit: as in the phrase hair on the tongue, not lisps generally.

Glad this thread came up because I think it's a relevant issue in today's society. As has been said here, so many guys find the need to justify what they say for fear that others might find them to be homosexual. We live in a sort of paranoid society that suggests nothing positive should be said about another man's physical attributes because it's a reflection on one's self and motives. I've experienced this myself. I have absolutely zero problem stating if a guy looks good or not, want to know why? It's human-nature to size up other people of the same sex. We are constantly comparing ourselves against others -- so it's a crime when someone orally announces it? I am perfectly comfortable with my sexuality to speak about the way another man looks and I've been judged for that, and I even know that some of the people I work with think I am gay because of #1 my music choice (most notably Coldplay), two not a butch masculine dude that throws a sledge hammer all day long, and #3 because I don't have a girlfriend.

 

The fact is, these same people that are making assumptions about you when you state if someone of the same sex is attractive or not, is honestly doing the same thing, but they won't admit it. Those people never admit that, and never will. That doesn't mean it isn't streaming through their brains just like these thoughts stream through ours. A lot of men simply aren't comfortable at all with complimenting another man's looks because of the conditioning of parents/society and how it's been for a long, long time. Plus, complimenting another man's looks as stated in this thread takes "power/masculinity" away from the one making the compliment, and as men we all know this is a big "no no."

 

I listen to a radio show in the morning at work that has two co-hosts, one a male, the other a female. The male drinks wine, doesn't care about sports other than golf, enjoys reality shows like dancing with the stars, among other "non-masculine" things -- he's perfectly straight and is married to his lovely wife. In American culture he would be 100% homosexual based on societal assumptions we make.

 

I personally am not a butch guy. I don't drink beer or do the typical "manly" activities. I don't smoke or do other things like that, I don't talk like a butch guy, and I get along quite well with women -- according to society I am probably 50% chance of being a homosexual lol. It's comical how the human mind works sometimes.

 

You know who you are, and that's what matters.

I think it matters a hell of a lot more when you are younger and in such a large group of underdeveloped people. Then when you get more choice of who you surround yourself with, this becomes less of a problem. There are always those who push the macho side of things and you are bound to come across them at all ages, no matter how hard you try and avoid it. But yeah, the school years are fucking weird.

tbh i think it's a bit of a stretch to call it sexism. i just don't think sexism can refer to gender discrimination against men, it's still gender discrimination sure but to me sexism also entails a broader 'backstory' of ongoing oppression and whatnot throughout history and society that men do not experience. in a similar way i don't think you can be racist to someone who is white

 

it's a thing though that is likely linked to homophobia and the attitudes that seek to continue these sorts of pervasive things

 

i'm awful at wording these things being relatively fresh to my opinions of these concepts but i hope you guys understand what i mean

tbh i think it's a bit of a stretch to call it sexism. i just don't think sexism can refer to gender discrimination against men, it's still gender discrimination sure but to me sexism also entails a broader 'backstory' of ongoing oppression and whatnot throughout history and society that men do not experience. in a similar way i don't think you can be racist to someone who is white

 

it's a thing though that is likely linked to homophobia and the attitudes that seek to continue these sorts of pervasive things

 

i'm awful at wording these things being relatively fresh to my opinions of these concepts but i hope you guys understand what i mean

 

I don't think anybody did call it sexist, apart from Nick, and he was only referring to one statement, jokingly.

 

The topic of whether it is possible to be sexist against men if you define sexism as involving historical oppression is an interesting discussion, though. I have yet to clarify my position on the matter so if you guys wanna open it up a bit and put your thoughts in, it might help me.