:lol:aaah, funny stuff!

WOW THAT WAS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ IN MY ENTIRE EXISTENCE, AND I WAS BORN IN 1883.

You're one old slut.

AM I?

yes :P

Or maybe you're an inmortal slut... :P

I read this somewhere before but it's still funny! :lol:

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules

>from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all

>numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

>

>1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it

>down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining

>about you leaving it down.

>

>1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the

>tides. Let it be.

>

>1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it

>that way.

>

>1. Crying is blackmail.

>

>1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do

>not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say

>it!

>

>1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every

question.

>

>1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's

>what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

>

>1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

>

>1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In

>fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

>

>1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us

>to act like soap opera guys.

>

>1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

>

>1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the

ways

>makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

>

>1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it

>done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it

>yourself.

>

>1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during

>commercials.

>

>1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

>

>1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,

>for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have

>no idea what mauve is.

>

>1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

>

>1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like

>nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the

>hassle.

>

>1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer

>you don't want to hear.

>

>1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is

>fine...Really.

>

>1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to

>discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster

>trucks.

>

>1. You have enough clothes.

>

>1. You have too many shoes.

>

>1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

>

>Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch

>tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like

camping.

 

Unfortunaly, you are not man enough to write your own thoughts.... you just simply copied them,following somebody's else thoughts....

like any man is going to fucking write out that many thoughts about women

bah!!

^^^

Is he making a point?! :stunned:

^^^^ too much eye shadow what waht?

and i'm too lazy to read it all, so i couldn't possibly see how any guy would take the time to think that all up and write it down...type

ya'll are crazy! :lol: :cool:

hmm yeah I agree with the bit about not using subtle hints. Blokes are too darn thick to pick up on those :rolleyes: I'm only half joking as well

smack us round the chops, and tekk us what you mean, and we'd still not get it!! :)

:lol:

I love men - so what :smug: :D :P :lol:

^^^

:lol: