Hi everyone, I'm a 15 year old girl, and I really need tips.. I'll tell you what's going on.

 

I've never been really social. When I was young, I hide as much as possible, and talk with other people as less as I could. I thought they would find the things I talked about stupid, and not interesting. Now, I;m at highschool and pretty lonely. I had friends, but through the years, I got less and less confident about all kinds of things.. Confidence level= 0 right now :( They really hate me, cause I kinda left them alone; I didn't know about what kind of things I could talk about. They got new friends too. And whenever they asked me to go to my place and chill, I said no. Cause I didn't know what to do at home..

 

Tips/advise anyone?

 

Thanks

Well I'm in the exact same position as you. I'm 15, I'm a nerd who performs I have a horrid acne problem.

 

BE social, if they ever want to come over, let them and just say, So listen I dont know what you guys want to do so you have suggestions?

 

Not to be seriotypical but I hang out with girls alot:

But talk about music, makeup, actors, school things, be open but not too open.

 

Also make friends who love things you do:

Me for example I have; music friends, Coldplaying friends, and regular everyday friends...like 4 of them...

This way you'll never get bored and if you have questions they'll help you

 

Hope this helps and good luck! :P

I swear this internet is killing me -__-

The only way you're going to be able to gain social skills and, in turn, confidence, is to just go out and do it. Sure, it's hard at first, but things get easier over time. A lot of the times, we are our own worst critic. We think negative things of ourselves that people don't even notice in us. People are more accepting than you think they are. You just have to have faith in that. You'll never know if people are interested in what you have to say if you don't say anything. In fact, you might find people who are actually highly interested and have the same interests as you do. However, you can't know for sure if you don't talk to people. Just try it. It's not ever as bad as it seems.

Thanks guys! The main problem is, when I talk to people I don't really know well, my brain just... STOPS, and then I don't have a clue what to talk about..

Yeah, I know what you mean. I still run into that problem sometimes. In cases like that, you just have to try to think of something to keep the conversation going. Just talk about basic things about yourself-bio, likes and dislikes, that sort of thing. If the person is compatible with you, I'm sure you'll find something to talk about. :smiley:

It's nice to know that I'm not the only one with these things! I haaate these awkward silent moments ahah

I always have that moment, then just stand around awkwardly because I can't think of anything to talk about. God it's awful.

You are not alone! :nice: I have lots of acquaintances, but only a few close friends. If this tells you anything, it's almost two months into the summer break, and I've seen my friends twice. I guess I met my friends due to class. We started off talking about school and homework and teachers, etc.. I don't know. You're sure to find someone to talk to!

 

~This all coming from an introverted bookworm who reads and listens to music at the lunch table. ;)

I always have that moment, then just stand around awkwardly because I can't think of anything to talk about. God it's awful.

 

That makes me think of when I was talking to this guy I really liked, and all I could come up with was ,"What's your dogs name?" (He was walking his dog) Then like an idiot I walked away! I was so humiliated!:embarrassed: I laugh about it now. :lol:

^Well, atleast, you HAVE some good friends..

Hi everyone, I'm a 15 year old girl, and I really need tips.. I'll tell you what's going on.

 

I've never been really social. When I was young, I hide as much as possible, and talk with other people as less as I could. I thought they would find the things I talked about stupid, and not interesting. Now, I;m at highschool and pretty lonely. I had friends, but through the years, I got less and less confident about all kinds of things.. Confidence level= 0 right now :( They really hate me, cause I kinda left them alone; I didn't know about what kind of things I could talk about. They got new friends too. And whenever they asked me to go to my place and chill, I said no. Cause I didn't know what to do at home..

 

Tips/advise anyone?

 

Thanks

 

Leave the internet and go outside. Seriously! Almost everyone is socially awkward here (and in Tumblr, etc)

 

Maybe you can join to a group activity (sports, etc) that could help.

Well, every year, I lose more of them. The problem is that they all have best friends. It makes it hard to find time to do anything with them. I haven't seen my "best" friend for almost a year and a half. You'll find your friends. I promise. :smiley:

Do volunteer work with an organization that interests you. I used to walk dogs and help run off site events for an animal shelter. It was fun, and I met several people of all ages. Most people find their cause near and dear to their hearts, so as an added bonus, you'll have an immediate topic of conversation. BTW, I was shy growing up, but it gets easier. Get out there; you might surprise yourself! :-)

Are you just not good at making friends in general, or do you look around and think "I'm not gonna get along with any of these people :freak:"

I've had the latter before, and I actually swapped some of my classes around because of it :blank:

Do volunteer work with an organization that interests you. I used to walk dogs and help run off site events for an animal shelter. It was fun, and I met several people of all ages. Most people find their cause near and dear to their hearts, so as an added bonus, you'll have an immediate topic of conversation. BTW, I was shy growing up, but it gets easier. Get out there; you might surprise yourself! :-)

 

Yeah, that's a good one, thanks! :)

What I realise right now, back when I did sports, I was more confident/more friends, so I should really go outside, and do sports again (:

Thanks guys! The main problem is, when I talk to people I don't really know well, my brain just... STOPS, and then I don't have a clue what to talk about..

 

I think at only one thing, be yourself, it's not people who need to change your personality. you have a great and strong personality.

and will respect your ideas your interests in life this persons .

 

and I think the best friends, not so much in life.

 

take time to meet best friends.

 

you know me not had time to have my 15 years old , because depression. because I had no identity and people was very bad with me.

Leave the internet and go outside. Seriously! Almost everyone is socially awkward here (and in Tumblr, etc)

 

Maybe you can join to a group activity (sports, etc) that could help.

 

AHA. It's funny because it's TRUE.

 

:disappointed:

 

But yeah, join a group. Those always help. If it weren't for band, I'm pretty sure high school would have been at least 10x worse than it was.

I want to be in a Coldplay Tribute band but nobody in this part of Jersey likes them -_-

I was the same when I was your age. I lived in a small village and didn't have much in common with the people I went to school with so I spent a lot of time on my own. I think it gets a lot easier to make friends once you move to a bigger city/ go to university because you're more likely to meet people with similar interests.

I was the same when I was your age. I lived in a small village and didn't have much in common with the people I went to school with so I spent a lot of time on my own. I think it gets a lot easier to make friends once you move to a bigger city/ go to university because you're more likely to meet people with similar interests.

 

this.

 

(I think I was the same)

It happened something similar to me last year because I changed school and didn't know anyone. I used to go to a small school, in my class we were only 7 students and I was friend of everyone of my class and of the school. But when I changed school last year in my class we were 40 students and I didn't know any of them! I tried to talk to them and everything because i'm quite sociable but they just looked at me and didn't say anything, I don't know why but I started to close myself and it was getting difficult for me to talk to some people, maybe if I had gone with someone I knew to this school it would have been easier! This year i'm in the same school and before starting classes I thought to myself that I had to be more open to everyone and try again, and really worked! Now in my class we're 37 people and i'm friend of almost everyone!!

 

So don't worry!! If you try you'll see that people will accept you and it will be easier for you to make new friends because i'm sure you're a nice person! What you said about doing sports is very true! Making other activities is a great way to know other people with your same interests!

I think it gets a lot easier to make friends once you move to a bigger city/ go to university because you're more likely to meet people with similar interests.

 

THIS. It's so true.

Yup, I agree with most here. Also, this phase you really need to get through, there will be awkward moments, but you'll get betyter with them each time, so by doing it/have social contacts you will grow over this. But you have to start with doing that.

 

and also, you might feel horrible when there's this silence or you don't know what to say, but the other person usually doesnit think you are an idiot for that. He/she is probably at that moment also feeling awkward him/herself! for being silent too. Or they like you even better because you show you are not perfect but are trying anyway. Also, many people will just recognize such moment from when they had them themselves, so they just sympathize with you :)

 

Get through it, is my advice.