Tim Bergling, a.k.a. Avicii, Dead at 28

[onlylove]

Ah man, they really mention his Coldplay fandom in this article:

 

https://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/inside-aviciis-final-days-w519621

 

So, so sad. I honestly could related to this article a lot. I also caught myself drinking too much to overcome anxiety in social situations (or anxiety in general). I'm glad I realized it early enough before it took over, but can see how the lifestyle and meteoric rise would become overwhelming. And depression...you get highs and manic and feel like you can conquer the world, but those lows drag you deep.

 

RIP.

[coldplaykb]

I guess Nicky Romero just played Heaven again at Kingsday.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45HykN_NCYc

Mobile Link: https://youtu.be/45HykN_NCYc

 

 

Not sure how true it is, but someone said he said it will most likely never be released :(

If it's never going to be released, then I wish he would just stop playing it. Let the song die already.

 

It's aggravating as well because I know people out there have the demo. That woule be something at least. Also I understand that we should respect Tim's wishes, and if he never wanted to release the song than so be it, but it would be such an amazing tribute to him. I think it would do really well if it were to be released. They could even donate some, if not all, of the proceeds to a charity or something in his name.

 

I don't mean to come off as a jerk or inconsiderate, but it's just such an amazing song and I think it deserves to be heard. I think it holds so much more meaning now as well.

 

Sent from my SM-G965U using Tapatalk

[IcebatofvalikinRRBZ8]

So if he were still alive and finished the new Album, Heaven wouldn't be included?

[RedBalloon]

Just finished watching the Avicii documentary (the one where Chris also appears in) after finding it on Youtube and wanted to share a few words on that.

First off, it was extremely disturbing to watch, knowing now how this story ultimately ended. The impression I got from this film is that this man literally was dragged/or in part also dragged himself to his death through his being ill-prepared for this massive touring and expectations, resulting in excessive alcohol consumption as well as misguided "mentors" (that's what his former manager calls himself here) who were just after the money and couldn't care less about mental or physical health. I think it shows how sick the music industry (and as a mirror of that, society's obsession with stardom or the next big thing or whatever you wanna call it) can be and how easily you can get crushed between the wheels.

Also, he's in hospital with recurring pancreatitis and I noticed there are three (!) at least 1,5 L Coke bottles in his room ! Um, not the best idea !

The film ends on a positive note with his new life after he insists on giving up touring against everyone's wishes, so one can only wonder what happened in the end. Especially with that last statement from his family making it sound like it could have been suicide after all... One can only guess but some destructive habits/patterns of thought are hard to change even when the pressure goes away. :expressionless:

 

This is very tragic~ another big reminder to take care of oneself's well being and make it as the first priority. Even there is an important thing/or a dream (to/for you) to do/accomplish, associate with kind people who do value humanity~

 

@onlylove, drinking sometimes might help reducing psychological pressure or making oneself insensitive to the pain/anxiety etc. but it creates a linkage or even addiction which is harmful in the long run, and doesn't solve the problem fundamentally. I hope you could first of all, to judge the situation and the source of anxiety, for example, is the requirement too high to reach, workload, set of skills, professional level, if so, is there a timeframe/process for gradual improvement? or, is mainly about relationships~ this might be complicated, but when you are calm, your intuition will tell you the morality side of people, personality etc.~ trying to observe first how they treat the peers, minority/children-older people, and the higher ranks, etc. which could probably give you a real sense who the people are.

Please try to find the local professionals and ask for advice if you feel it too overwhelming, then you probably need external "assistance/intervention", such as following a healthy/counter-anxiety routine to "change" your behavior pattern: for example, once you feel anxious and can't help drinking, you may "alarm" yourself to begin an activity you feel the most relaxing and make your energies upgrading from "anxiety" frequency to better ones:

A picture in the middle of the page below:

https://coldplaying.com/forum/index.php?threads/dont-let-it-break-your-heart.107476/page-29#post-5904649

hope that might help a bit ~

[onlylove]

This is very tragic~ another big reminder to take care of oneself's well being and make it as the first priority. Even there is an important thing/or a dream (to/for you) to do/accomplish, associate with kind people who do value humanity~

 

@onlylove, drinking sometimes might help reducing psychological pressure or making oneself insensitive to the pain/anxiety etc. but it creates a linkage or even addiction which is harmful in the long run, and doesn't solve the problem fundamentally. I hope you could first of all, to judge the situation and the source of anxiety, for example, is the requirement too high to reach, workload, set of skills, professional level, if so, is there a timeframe/process for gradual improvement? or, is mainly about relationships~ this might be complicated, but when you are calm, your intuition will tell you the morality side of people, personality etc.~ trying to observe first how they treat the peers, minority/children-older people, and the higher ranks, etc. which could probably give you a real sense who the people are.

Please try to find the local professionals and ask for advice if you feel it too overwhelming, then you probably need external "assistance/intervention", such as following a healthy/counter-anxiety routine to "change" your behavior pattern: for example, once you feel anxious and can't help drinking, you may "alarm" yourself to begin an activity you feel the most relaxing and make your energies upgrading from "anxiety" frequency to better ones:

A picture in the middle of the page below:

https://coldplaying.com/forum/index.php?threads/dont-let-it-break-your-heart.107476/page-29#post-5904649

hope that might help a bit ~

 

It's. good reminder. I have gotten professional help from time to time but not enough...To be honest, when it gets too deep and we uncover too much I run away. I don't drink away the pain anymore like I used to, so I have gotten over that hump, but you are right - I always have to be vigilant about it because it does get addictive.

 

As a child, I had something traumatic happen to me for a few years that I kept hidden and even blacked out until it came back to me when I was a teenager...then I told people and they did nothing because it was "too late, why didn't I say something sooner"...so it has always messed me up. It is unbelievable what that kind of trauma can do to you to shape your life. When I look at my anxiety, my insecurities, my confidence, think about who I could've been had it not happened....I do get bitter. Before it happened, I apparently was a very confident child, but then I shrank in my shell.

 

Despite all that, miraculously, I have persevered and am in quite a good place in my life, with my family, my work, everything really. I am unbelievably grateful. Sometimes I do go to a dark place though. I probably do need to sort it all out eventually. But I'm honestly afraid of what might change if I do face it further.

[RedBalloon]

Dear ONLYLOVE,

*Hugs and Love*~ I feel sorry but also good to hear your stories; even I don't drink, but I could totally understand your "drink away the pain". Thanks for all the courage, honest and trust, and share with us your experiences and feelings~ this is magical, I can relate to your writings very much as I myself have some heavy childhood/teenager traumas I unconsciously hid (even early twenties) till some external challenges/threatened events triggering and bringing them all out which I felt worsening and helpless/despaired. I've learnt a lot through a long process, and having better understanding of my inner self, the roots of certain psychological states/patterns leading to my reactions/behaviors to certain situations/people etc. how I unconsciously inherited some not so positive/healthy pattern from Origin Family [or bigger environment], how I yearn for harmony at the expense of being treated unfairly, how I become emotional unstable when I have to face violence, unfairness, bullying and how I find inner potential to see the whole process more objectively to heal and love myself, making good/better choices etc. later on, and how such experiences would naturally make me more compassionate and opening up to my inner voices, feelings, and even authentic Truth. I am not a psychiatric or psychological professional, but I've read quite a few online/offline materials/books with very good revealing/healing energies, practices/advices etc. I've researched and interviewed professionals of different disciplines/areas to collect cases and provide analysis/report for children's [0-18] well-being project. So I would like to input a bit more here, for your case and maybe it is helpful for other members as well.

 

It's. good reminder. I have gotten professional help from time to time but not enough...To be honest, when it gets too deep and we uncover too much I run away. I don't drink away the pain anymore like I used to, so I have gotten over that hump, but you are right - I always have to be vigilant about it because it does get addictive.

I think you are very good at telling the whole story by writing, the description certainly reflects that you are not only seeing the whole process/phenomenon, and you are very observant to what's going on inside/outside at the moment/current state. I certainly understand and agree that the deeper issues take "synergies" to look within and take care, even over a relatively long period of time. Running away is a self-protective method for natural/instinctive protection from second/further harm or uneasiness until when the conditions are relatively set good/comfortable/trustful, your inner self may choose to open up bravely to "face" them yourself, in the mean time, to decide whether allowing others (a professional, or a trustworthy friend, or teacher, or even partner) to see and help you too. It takes a lot to get to this stage, because, if the conditions are not set right/good for you, it might create new problems or make the original more complex, or even harming/hurting your inner being again unconsciously or purposely - which would trigger your strong reactions sometimes you would try your best to control or hide.

It is good that you've over "that hump", which might mean by certain understanding and a few methods, you could handle and cope with/live with it, as we all know, we need to get our daily function well carried out, etc. Sometimes, we may think when we are getting old/mature/more capable, such problems might be gone little by little, we need not to seek its resolution explicitly or intentionally, etc. it might be the most common views/ways to handle this. On the other hand, by my experiences, there would be good timing to face it and once it is relieved level by level gradually, you will feel so relaxing, the good/loving/free energies coming back to your heart center, you feel alive again, "the internal scar are completely healed"

["Precious years to remember, Childhood fears I surrender" - from Cranberries' Joe]. There was once a student in my class, she is so "talented" in language and she can recite old long poems in foreign languages; she's got Fulbright scholarship later on. But she was once very "vulnerable or insecure[or even depressed]" and cried a few times every week, and we had lots of talking and sharing. She is easily to become nervous and stressful, and I know she probably got family issues - her parents were divorced and lived in different continents, although her mom intentionally flew to a third country to attend her graduation ceremony and quite supported her too - when she cried so hard, I see a vulnerable child crying for help, care and protection, and I see the purity and honest of a child too - crying is also a powerful releasing way - sometimes, the outer condition/"social custom" have a pre-signature, that "a certain person shall not cry in ****", etc. it might not be healthy although most of time it might show "strength" - by all the experiences, I think the true strength in humanity is to be real, honest, compassionate and kind towards oneself and each other, your external world would become more beautiful to you, you would naturally attract people who are good to you, respect/appreciate you more, which can certainly bring you more healthy, supportive relationship, either personal or professional.

 

So, be vigilant, be patient - waiting for right time/people to uncover, no pressure, no compelling, taking care and protecting yourself first for that "sensitive" part. Sometimes, animals/nature and their energies are very healing, trying to associate with them when you feel a bit addictive or you feel like it is coming. Sometimes, such addictive symptom may indicate we are lack of sth. essential or basic, or we might be deprived needed care/love/protection when we mostly need or we are most vulnerable [could be in childhood[father figure or mother figure etc.], or in intimate relationship] regardless of our bio-age. For example, there is a very moving scene in Saving Private Ryan, that one solider asking his mate to fulfill his last will and calling mama and home right before he died when he was severely injured. This could be also taken as an external reflection of "internal trauma" as physical scene are easily seen and managed than the internal, I think that's why some healing methods, involving "bringing them into physical scene/imagination", it can help to see the "internal picture" and then begin to connect and communicate.

 

As a child, I had something traumatic happen to me for a few years that I kept hidden and even blacked out until it came back to me when I was a teenager...then I told people and they did nothing because it was "too late, why didn't I say something sooner"...so it has always messed me up. It is unbelievable what that kind of trauma can do to you to shape your life. When I look at my anxiety, my insecurities, my confidence, think about who I could've been had it not happened....I do get bitter. Before it happened, I apparently was a very confident child, but then I shrank in my shell.

 

Like physical injury and curing, we don't and can't wait till it gets worse - that might create: 1) a "cold/caring less/very introverted" nature of the "child" as when s/he once asks for help for people who s/he(or want to ) trusts and expects, they don't return any loving/advice; 2) s/he might take this Nothing as neglecting, if this triggers similar issue/scar, s/he become more self-neglecting, which might negatively affect self-well-being, there might be complains or repressed anger as well; 3) when sth. is not resolved or clarified in due time or immediately, a problem may become bigger/heavier or even a burden - as energy will be intensified once it is "repeated" and unresolved; 4) a good "problem - solving - back to peace" cycle/pattern/psychological indication might not be established, on the contrary, it might affect "security/self-confidence/believe in good things will happen to me", the optimistic pattern.

 

I can totally feel your feelings, the bitter one. I didn't even know asking for help when my traumatic/unresolved issues were triggered by not so good external events, a strict voice telling me in my head: try to be like grown-up, be strong, be mature, be self-responsible, but besides the will power, I didn't know how to handle such at that time, if I could listen to my heart instead~ I will ask for the help from the trust-worthy people. I think, for you, don't worry too much, don't regret or feel "my future would be ....because I can never be a confident/beautiful/optimistic child I was used to be", there is always time, hope and love. For "not tell in time or sooner", are you threatened, or injured, but due to fear or some reasons, you dare not tell the people for protection or justice at that moment? please restore in you that you are deserved to be treated with respect, love and fairness, the people who harm you shall apologize for their behaviors and ask for your forgiveness sincerely, or you can choose to leave the people and the relationship; if there is any misunderstanding, you shall clarify before making decisions. On the other hand, we are all humans, sometimes, people may make us feeling harmful or hurt unconsciously, or hard words/hot temper/or the weakness of human nature can drive people behave badly and a bit blindly, etc. it might make a good relationship developing downwardly, we may learn to forgive oneself/others, some of which are after sincere apology, others might be not, and we can move on~ if there is always a feeling of "being hurt - no fairness - feeling sad and angry" it is not good for anyone in the long run. When you truly forgive, you set yourself free - it is not to say the injurer's doing is right, but let time/spiritual due time/natural force to handle it. The wisdom goes like "anything goes around, comes around"(there is Law of the universe, someone call it Karma, someone just call it wisdom), let it be.

 

 

Despite all that, miraculously, I have persevered and am in quite a good place in my life, with my family, my work, everything really. I am unbelievably grateful. Sometimes I do go to a dark place though. I probably do need to sort it all out eventually. But I'm honestly afraid of what might change if I do face it further.

Great, and good to hear that! Being grateful is a good virtue, and indeed we all have our litter dark place where there is always chance of love/light shinning in. I myself am in the process of sorting things out very fundamentally, how some patterns are repeated by generations, how gender issues shape the family/social environment I grew up and my personal relationships, once I become more self-healing, strong, if I can help and they also need, maybe I will help them. But before that, I concentrate on myself, staying away from any type of violence, abuse, etc.

Thanks for your writing, I wish you and all O the Best :):heart::sun::broken_heart::sun::heart: "Heal Up"~ Co.'s Up and Up

[onlylove]

Dear ONLYLOVE,

*Hugs and Love*~ I feel sorry but also good to hear your stories; even I don't drink, but I could totally understand your "drink away the pain". Thanks for all the courage, honest and trust, and share with us your experiences and feelings~ this is magical, I can relate to your writings very much as I myself have some heavy childhood/teenager traumas I unconsciously hid (even early twenties) till some external challenges/threatened events triggering and bringing them all out which I felt worsening and helpless/despaired. I've learnt a lot through a long process, and having better understanding of my inner self, the roots of certain psychological states/patterns leading to my reactions/behaviors to certain situations/people etc. how I unconsciously inherited some not so positive/healthy pattern from Origin Family [or bigger environment], how I yearn for harmony at the expense of being treated unfairly, how I become emotional unstable when I have to face violence, unfairness, bullying and how I find inner potential to see the whole process more objectively to heal and love myself, making good/better choices etc. later on, and how such experiences would naturally make me more compassionate and opening up to my inner voices, feelings, and even authentic Truth. I am not a psychiatric or psychological professional, but I've read quite a few online/offline materials/books with very good revealing/healing energies, practices/advices etc. I've researched and interviewed professionals of different disciplines/areas to collect cases and provide analysis/report for children's [0-18] well-being project. So I would like to input a bit more here, for your case and maybe it is helpful for other members as well.

 

It's. good reminder. I have gotten professional help from time to time but not enough...To be honest, when it gets too deep and we uncover too much I run away. I don't drink away the pain anymore like I used to, so I have gotten over that hump, but you are right - I always have to be vigilant about it because it does get addictive.

I think you are very good at telling the whole story by writing, the description certainly reflects that you are not only seeing the whole process/phenomenon, and you are very observant to what's going on inside/outside at the moment/current state. I certainly understand and agree that the deeper issues take "synergies" to look within and take care, even over a relatively long period of time. Running away is a self-protective method for natural/instinctive protection from second/further harm or uneasiness until when the conditions are relatively set good/comfortable/trustful, your inner self may choose to open up bravely to "face" them yourself, in the mean time, to decide whether allowing others (a professional, or a trustworthy friend, or teacher, or even partner) to see and help you too. It takes a lot to get to this stage, because, if the conditions are not set right/good for you, it might create new problems or make the original more complex, or even harming/hurting your inner being again unconsciously or purposely - which would trigger your strong reactions sometimes you would try your best to control or hide.

It is good that you've over "that hump", which might mean by certain understanding and a few methods, you could handle and cope with/live with it, as we all know, we need to get our daily function well carried out, etc. Sometimes, we may think when we are getting old/mature/more capable, such problems might be gone little by little, we need not to seek its resolution explicitly or intentionally, etc. it might be the most common views/ways to handle this. On the other hand, by my experiences, there would be good timing to face it and once it is relieved level by level gradually, you will feel so relaxing, the good/loving/free energies coming back to your heart center, you feel alive again, "the internal scar are completely healed"

["Precious years to remember, Childhood fears I surrender" - from Cranberries' Joe]. There was once a student in my class, she is so "talented" in language and she can recite old long poems in foreign languages; she's got Fulbright scholarship later on. But she was once very "vulnerable or insecure[or even depressed]" and cried a few times every week, and we had lots of talking and sharing. She is easily to become nervous and stressful, and I know she probably got family issues - her parents were divorced and lived in different continents, although her mom intentionally flew to a third country to attend her graduation ceremony and quite supported her too - when she cried so hard, I see a vulnerable child crying for help, care and protection, and I see the purity and honest of a child too - crying is also a powerful releasing way - sometimes, the outer condition/"social custom" have a pre-signature, that "a certain person shall not cry in ****", etc. it might not be healthy although most of time it might show "strength" - by all the experiences, I think the true strength in humanity is to be real, honest, compassionate and kind towards oneself and each other, your external world would become more beautiful to you, you would naturally attract people who are good to you, respect/appreciate you more, which can certainly bring you more healthy, supportive relationship, either personal or professional.

 

So, be vigilant, be patient - waiting for right time/people to uncover, no pressure, no compelling, taking care and protecting yourself first for that "sensitive" part. Sometimes, animals/nature and their energies are very healing, trying to associate with them when you feel a bit addictive or you feel like it is coming. Sometimes, such addictive symptom may indicate we are lack of sth. essential or basic, or we might be deprived needed care/love/protection when we mostly need or we are most vulnerable [could be in childhood[father figure or mother figure etc.], or in intimate relationship] regardless of our bio-age. For example, there is a very moving scene in Saving Private Ryan, that one solider asking his mate to fulfill his last will and calling mama and home right before he died when he was severely injured. This could be also taken as an external reflection of "internal trauma" as physical scene are easily seen and managed than the internal, I think that's why some healing methods, involving "bringing them into physical scene/imagination", it can help to see the "internal picture" and then begin to connect and communicate.

 

 

As a child, I had something traumatic happen to me for a few years that I kept hidden and even blacked out until it came back to me when I was a teenager...then I told people and they did nothing because it was "too late, why didn't I say something sooner"...so it has always messed me up. It is unbelievable what that kind of trauma can do to you to shape your life. When I look at my anxiety, my insecurities, my confidence, think about who I could've been had it not happened....I do get bitter. Before it happened, I apparently was a very confident child, but then I shrank in my shell.

 

Like physical injury and curing, we don't and can't wait till it gets worse - that might create: 1) a "cold/caring less/very introverted" nature of the "child" as when s/he once asks for help for people who s/he(or want to ) trusts and expects, they don't return any loving/advice; 2) s/he might take this Nothing as neglecting, if this triggers similar issue/scar, s/he become more self-neglecting, which might negatively affect self-well-being, there might be complains or repressed anger as well; 3) when sth. is not resolved or clarified in due time or immediately, a problem may become bigger/heavier or even a burden - as energy will be intensified once it is "repeated" and unresolved; 4) a good "problem - solving - back to peace" cycle/pattern/psychological indication might not be established, on the contrary, it might affect "security/self-confidence/believe in good things will happen to me", the optimistic pattern.

 

I can totally feel your feelings, the bitter one. I didn't even know asking for help when my traumatic/unresolved issues were triggered by not so good external events, a strict voice telling me in my head: try to be like grown-up, be strong, be mature, be self-responsible, but besides the will power, I didn't know how to handle such at that time, if I could listen to my heart instead~ I will ask for the help from the trust-worthy people. I think, for you, don't worry too much, don't regret or feel "my future would be ....because I can never be a confident/beautiful/optimistic child I was used to be", there is always time, hope and love. For "not tell in time or sooner", are you threatened, or injured, but due to fear or some reasons, you dare not tell the people for protection or justice at that moment? please restore in you that you are deserved to be treated with respect, love and fairness, the people who harm you shall apologize for their behaviors and ask for your forgiveness sincerely, or you can choose to leave the people and the relationship; if there is any misunderstanding, you shall clarify before making decisions. On the other hand, we are all humans, sometimes, people may make us feeling harmful or hurt unconsciously, or hard words/hot temper/or the weakness of human nature can drive people behave badly and a bit blindly, etc. it might make a good relationship developing downwardly, we may learn to forgive oneself/others, some of which are after sincere apology, others might be not, and we can move on~ if there is always a feeling of "being hurt - no fairness - feeling sad and angry" it is not good for anyone in the long run. When you truly forgive, you set yourself free - it is not to say the injurer's doing is right, but let time/spiritual due time/natural force to handle it. The wisdom goes like "anything goes around, comes around"(there is Law of the universe, someone call it Karma, someone just call it wisdom), let it be.

 

 

Despite all that, miraculously, I have persevered and am in quite a good place in my life, with my family, my work, everything really. I am unbelievably grateful. Sometimes I do go to a dark place though. I probably do need to sort it all out eventually. But I'm honestly afraid of what might change if I do face it further.

Great, and good to hear that! Being grateful is a good virtue, and indeed we all have our litter dark place where there is always chance of love/light shinning in. I myself am in the process of sorting things out very fundamentally, how some patterns are repeated by generations, how gender issues shape the family/social environment I grew up and my personal relationships, once I become more self-healing, strong, if I can help and they also need, maybe I will help them. But before that, I concentrate on myself, staying away from any type of violence, abuse, etc.

Thanks for your writing, I wish you and all O the Best :):heart::sun::broken_heart::sun::heart: "Heal Up"~ Co.'s Up and Up

 

This is beautiful and healing. Thank you.