Source: The Daily Telegraph, Saturday, January 13, 2007, p.79

 

By: Joe Hildebrand

 

Foods I don't like

 

This week: Apple

 

Believe it or not, apples are one of the very few fruits I do like. But I am not talking about the fruit here, I am talking about the offspring of Gwyneth Paltrow and that glum fellow from England.

 

It's fair to say that I really hate that kid.

 

Sure, I've never met him or her but I don't like the way its beady little eyes peer out at me when I'm reading Who Weekly.

 

While I'm at it, what is Who Weekly doing with that stupid "Report/Retort" section when they pick a great story from one of their rival publications and then dismiss it because it was entirely made up.

 

Talk about missing the point.

I don't get it :confused:

Joe Hildebrand is an opinion writer in the newspaper that we get delivered. I was reading his page yesterday and he has this section where he writes the food that he doesn't like this week. And I was reading it and he's talking about Apple Martin and how he doesn't like her and I just felt like sharing my surprise at the randomness of having someone write about her. So I copied what he wrote and put it into a thread.

Why do tabloids think we care about what these random columnists think/like/dislike? No one even knows who they are.

How sad is it that he hates a child?

I am kind of shocked to read something like that in the Daily Telegraph - which is supposed to be one of our 'quality' broadsheet newspapers...

 

I realise he's 'trying' to be funny but it is actually a pretty terrible thing to write about a small child. A newspaper like that really shouldn't be promoting anything that refers to hating a young child.

 

These newspaper columnists usually give an email address for responses to their articles and this is the first time I actually feel like writing in and saying how unacceptable what he has written is!

 

And it's not just that it is Apple - no one's small children should be the subject of that kind of adult 'humour'. I bet he'd be angry if anyone said that about his kids or the kids of someone he knows...

What a twat! Making a public attack on a 2 year old, aren't we a big boy.:whatever:

What a twat! Making a public attack on a 2 year old' date=' aren't we a big boy.:whatever:[/quote']

 

Couldn't've said it better myself.

 

Douchebag.

Opinions are like assholes:

 

Everybody's got one,

Most of them stink,

and they're usually full of SHITE!

 

(or maybe I should have just said 'opinion columnists are alssholes!)

who cares, he's a retard.

what a freak guy :freak:

these words hurt ...poor Apple

Hahahahaha, I can't believe how seriously you people are taking this.

 

You shouldn't at all be offended because really, Apple has nothing to do with Coldplay the band.

Hahahahaha, I can't believe how seriously you people are taking this.

 

You shouldn't at all be offended because really, Apple has nothing to do with Coldplay the band.

:lol: Yeah...

 

But I have to admit that this article was really harsh.

 

:D Especially because Apple is soooo cute. :heart:

 

:lol: Seriously, I liked that kid the first second I saw a picture of her. Well, there are not many pictures of her in her first few months because her parents avoided having been seen with her, for certain reasons.

 

But, aw, she is awfully cute. :D

This doesn't bother me because it's Chris's daughter. It bothers me because someone is saying they hate a kid. I think the writer was probably joking. I just think he took it a bit too far.

File another one under "weirdo jerks with nothing better to do" :dozey:

This doesn't bother me because it's Chris's daughter. It bothers me because someone is saying they hate a kid. I think the writer was probably joking. I just think he took it a bit too far.

Yeah, you're right...

 

Yeah, that actually is really... er... weird.

 

Yeah, who would hate a kid, that's right...

This doesn't bother me because it's Chris's daughter. It bothers me because someone is saying they hate a kid. I think the writer was probably joking. I just think he took it a bit too far.

 

You must be the type of person who finds George Carlins humor offensive.

 

File another one under "weirdo jerks with nothing better to do" :dozey:

 

Be honest, if this were a Coldplay fan fiction thread (read: actual weirdos with nothing better to do), you wouldn't be bitching.

tompiltoff is fuccckkkin conk blo

hahaha

see see 50 owns u ahhhhh

piltoff sucks donkey dick blo ahh

You must be the type of person who finds George Carlins humor offensive.

 

 

 

Be honest, if this were a Coldplay fan fiction thread (read: actual weirdos with nothing better to do), you wouldn't be bitching.

Actually, I love George Carlin. But even his most 'offensive' humour is generally observational in nature (more recently, anyway). He doesn't just insult people for its own sake. That, and the people he goes after are usually deserving of his comments. You can't very well say a 2 year old child is deserving.

That' date=' and the people he goes after are usually deserving of his comments. You can't very well say a 2 year old child is deserving.[/quote']

 

 

Right, but you really don't see how the article was just the guy bitching about celebrity children?

 

You realize he doesn't actually hate Apple Martin, it was a joke. You could replace her name with any celebrity baby and the message would have remained the same.

Right, but you really don't see how the article was just the guy bitching about celebrity children?

 

You realize he doesn't actually hate Apple Martin, it was a joke. You could replace her name with any celebrity baby and the message would have remained the same.

You could use any name you chose...celebrity or otherwise, and it would still annoy me. Of course it was a joke! I personally didn't find it funny.

You could use any name you chose...celebrity or otherwise' date=' and it would still annoy me. Of course it was a joke! I personally didn't find it funny.[/quote']

 

Yeah, I didn't find it funny either. But I find it funny that people are (pretending) to be offended.

What a twat! Making a public attack on a 2 year old' date=' aren't we a big boy.:whatever:[/quote']

i,i could kick his ass for that

Right, but you really don't see how the article was just the guy bitching about celebrity children?

 

You realize he doesn't actually hate Apple Martin, it was a joke. You could replace her name with any celebrity baby and the message would have remained the same.

Perhaps he should vent at lame journos and paps that feel the need to stalk and write about 2 year olds that are just trying to do things like go the zoo with their dad or the park with the gran.

Hmm... He's actually a pretty funny guy, the writer of the article. I usually read his opinion section, I like him. I didn't really find offense when I saw the article... I was like "What the? Random!" and I did think that 'hate' was a strong word to use for a kid but I didn't really care. Plus, he was talking bull... Just filling up space, I think.

 

I actually agree with TomPiltoff - he was having a go at celebrity kids in general.

 

But yeah, he was a bit harsh.