this is the funniest joke ever

(plus its not bad)

 

 

 

TOP TEN TIMES IN HISTORY, WHEN USING THE "F" WORD WAS APPROPRIATE

 

10th - "Scattered @#$%ing showers, my ass!" - Noah, 4314 BC

 

9th - "How the @#$% did you work that out?" - Pythagorus,126 BC

 

8th - "You want WHAT on the @#$%ing ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566

 

7th - "Where did all those @#$%ing Indians come from?" Custer, 1877

 

6th - "It does so @#$%ing look like her!" - Picasso, 1926

 

5th - "Where the @#$% are we?" - Amelia Earhart, 1937

 

4th - "Any @#$%ing idiot could understand that." - Einstein, 1938

 

3rd - "What the @#$% was that?" - Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945

 

2nd - "I need this parade like I need a @#$%ing hole in the head!" -JFK, 1963

 

And,.....(drum roll )The Number 1 most appropriate time for using the "F" word.......

 

"Aw c'mon. Who the @#$% is going to find out?"- Bill Clinton,1997

:lol: :lol: :lol: good ones, man!

 

and yep Gaby...just trying to make sure! lol

:lol: Those are great

:lol:

Waitress: What'll it be, mister?

 

Man: Tell you what. I want my eggs hard and burned around the edges. I want my bacon burned to a crisp. I want coffee, very bitter. And when you bring me the food, I want you to YELL at me about how I ruined your life.

 

Waitress: Are you nuts?

 

Man: No, I'm homesick!

 

 

:P

 

Great like it!!![glow=red:ec16e98b61][fade:ec16e98b61][/fade:ec16e98b61][/glow:ec16e98b61]

another revival of this thread! :)

Ok here's one...

Why did the horse cross the road?

 

 

 

 

 

:idea2:

 

 

 

 

Because he wanted to go visit his NEIGHbour! hahahahahaha :dozey:

:lol: :lol: good one!

 

and thanks...i'm sure u and others have really good jokes up ya'lls sleeves! :wink3: :cool:

 

((((((((((Jess)))))))))))))

:lol: That was pretty corny I know, but no one was posting jokes! It called for desperate measures. :P

how you seen some of my previous jokes that i posted on here?--they were ALL corny, some more than others! :rolleyes: :D :lol:

 

i like all jokes, no discrimination! :D

:D Alright I have a blonde joke then..no offense to the blondies (I am one too!) :P

 

A blonde walked into the library. She went to the service desk and said to the librarian "I'll have a burger, fries and a coke please."

The librarian said "Uhhh I'm sorry miss, this is a library".

So the blondie whispers "Oh I'm sorry, can I have burger, fries and a coke?"

blondes...some of them are quite lovable, u know! :sneaky:

 

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I should hope so :sneaky: :lol:

"Have you heard this rumor that President Bush may be dumping Dick Cheney from the ticket? ... He doesn't want to drop Cheney but he felt two guys running together on the same ticket might look too gay."

 

 

 

"I'm on that new Ralph Nader exercise program. ... It's not very strenuous. You only run for a couple of months every four years."

 

 

 

 

"According to a new poll, if the presidential election were held tomorrow -- a lot of folks would be taken by surprise."

 

:lol:

:shock:

Ok, I know one average joke - it was in our textbook for english lessons - in Headway - English probably know this book :wink3:

 

So: A penguin Joke

One day a man and his wife were walking down the street when they came across a penguin. "Oh!" exclaimed the man. " What a surprise! What shall we do with it?"

"I know,"said his wife. "We'll ask a policeman."

So they found a policeman and explained what had happened.

"Mmm," said the policeman. " I think the best thing is to take it to the zoo."

"Oh, good! We'll go there straight away!"said the woman.

The next morning the policeman was walking down the same street when he saw the couple again with the penguin. " I thought I told you to take that penguin to the zoo," said.

"Yeah, we did,"said the man. "And we all had really good time. So this afternoon we're taking it to the cinema!"

Ha, ha, ha, ha... I know... :confused: But please - smileeeeee :D

:lol: :lol: :lol: good one! :D i love it! :-)

Thanks ;)

Ok, I know one average joke - it was in our textbook for english lessons - in Headway - English probably know this book :wink3:

 

So: A penguin Joke

One day a man and his wife were walking down the street when they came across a penguin. "Oh!" exclaimed the man. " What a surprise! What shall we do with it?"

"I know,"said his wife. "We'll ask a policeman."

So they found a policeman and explained what had happened.

"Mmm," said the policeman. " I think the best thing is to take it to the zoo."

"Oh, good! We'll go there straight away!"said the woman.

The next morning the policeman was walking down the same street when he saw the couple again with the penguin. " I thought I told you to take that penguin to the zoo," said.

"Yeah, we did,"said the man. "And we all had really good time. So this afternoon we're taking it to the cinema!"

Ha, ha, ha, ha... I know... :confused: But please - smileeeeee :D

 

 

Lol :lol: :lol:

:blush: