DavidB5 Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 Yesterday, I was thinking about the as yet unreleased songs from the MX Era and was inspired to write lyrics to Tomorrow. Here they are: Tomorrow Tomorrow, we'll fly away In the burning sunlight at the break of day Tomorrow, you'll see us fly Over the hills into the endless sky But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day Tomorrow, you'll see us go Away into the sunlight's glow Tomorrow, in the snow Where are we now tell me do you know? But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day Tomorrow, they'll wonder why The two of us flew to the sky Tomorrow, back home we'll fly Nevermore to say goodbye But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day If they're terrible, please don't be too harsh, as this is my first time writing song lyrics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
42JTR Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 I must say they sound really very Coldplayish, well done:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB5 Posted November 7, 2011 Author Share Posted November 7, 2011 I must say they sound really very Coldplayish, well done:D Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alien Radio Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 Yeah, they sound really Coldplayish. :) But they're pretty good for the first time. ;) I really really really like the first verse! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 Yesterday, I was thinking about the as yet unreleased songs from the MX Era and was inspired to write lyrics to Tomorrow. Here they are: Tomorrow Tomorrow, we'll fly away In the burning sunlight at the break of day Tomorrow, you'll see us fly Over the hills into the endless sky But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day Tomorrow, you'll see us go Away into the sunlight's glow Tomorrow, in the snow Where are we now tell me do you know? But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day Tomorrow, they'll wonder why The two of us flew to the sky Tomorrow, back home we'll fly Nevermore to say goodbye But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day If they're terrible, please don't be too harsh, as this is my first time writing song lyrics. Much better than the first song I ever wrote, and to echo, yes very Coldplay. ...If you want to improve as a songwriter though, the best piece of advice I was ever given is that concrete images are the key to writing. Concrete images that you imagine in your head, something different that makes you think. A good example of this would be in The Smiths' Stop Me If You Think That You've Heard This One Before, where Morrissey claims "And the pain was enough to make a shy bald buddhist reflect and plan a mass-murder". Of course, not all lyrics are that graphic, and something like "I've got my right side fighting while my left hides under the chair" also gives a nice picture. Not a criticism of your piece, just a little advice I picked up! :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB5 Posted November 7, 2011 Author Share Posted November 7, 2011 Much better than the first song I ever wrote, and to echo, yes very Coldplay. ...If you want to improve as a songwriter though, the best piece of advice I was ever given is that concrete images are the key to writing. Concrete images that you imagine in your head, something different that makes you think. A good example of this would be in The Smiths' Stop Me If You Think That You've Heard This One Before, where Morrissey claims "And the pain was enough to make a shy bald buddhist reflect and plan a mass-murder". Of course, not all lyrics are that graphic, and something like "I've got my right side fighting while my left hides under the chair" also gives a nice picture. Not a criticism of your piece, just a little advice I picked up! :P Thanks! I never understood how you fight with your side under a chair, though. That sounds painful. And like you would lose very fast. Great lyric though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 Thanks! I never understood how you fight with your side under a chair, though. That sounds painful. And like you would lose very fast. Great lyric though. I think it's metaphorical but just the idea of Chris swordfighting under a chair makes me laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB5 Posted November 7, 2011 Author Share Posted November 7, 2011 I think it's metaphorical but just the idea of Chris swordfighting under a chair makes me laugh. The idea of anyone swordfighting under a chair makes me laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samuel_94 Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 They do sound very Coldplayish! Even more freaky - they sound like Mylo Xyloto era lyrics!! Very well done they are very good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB5 Posted November 7, 2011 Author Share Posted November 7, 2011 They do sound very Coldplayish! Even more freaky - they sound like Mylo Xyloto era lyrics!! Very well done they are very good! Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samuel_94 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Thanks! You're very welcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cleggy Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Surprisingly, those lyrics aren't actually shit. They're much better than Paradise at least. Not a bad effort, definitely sounds like something from the MX era. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew42LP5 Posted November 12, 2011 Share Posted November 12, 2011 Those lyrics are really good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheese Nip 2 Posted November 12, 2011 Share Posted November 12, 2011 I love thoses lyrics! If you do anymore lyrics it would be cool if you included references to other songs like Coldplay do on the album. Just an idea.:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marchez94 Posted November 12, 2011 Share Posted November 12, 2011 They're really good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
golfing7861 Posted November 12, 2011 Share Posted November 12, 2011 Sounds soo authentic :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjbk24 Posted November 14, 2011 Share Posted November 14, 2011 Yesterday, I was thinking about the as yet unreleased songs from the MX Era and was inspired to write lyrics to Tomorrow. Here they are: Tomorrow Tomorrow, we'll fly away In the burning sunlight at the break of day Tomorrow, you'll see us fly Over the hills into the endless sky But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day Tomorrow, you'll see us go Away into the sunlight's glow Tomorrow, in the snow Where are we now tell me do you know? But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day Tomorrow, they'll wonder why The two of us flew to the sky Tomorrow, back home we'll fly Nevermore to say goodbye But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day But we always say, The sun will rise tomorrow And bring a new day If they're terrible, please don't be too harsh, as this is my first time writing song lyrics. Honestly, the rhymes are a bit too repetitive and obvious for me... but I think they do sound like coldplay. You did a good job keeping the thesis of the song in focus... As for the comment on making lyrics with concrete imagery or whatever... I think lyrics are much better with some guessing/interpretation involved... i.e. dylan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samuel_94 Posted November 14, 2011 Share Posted November 14, 2011 Honestly, the rhymes are a bit too repetitive and obvious for me... but I think they do sound like coldplay. You did a good job keeping the thesis of the song in focus... As for the comment on making lyrics with concrete imagery or whatever... I think lyrics are much better with some guessing/interpretation involved... i.e. dylan. So basically you are saying Coldplay's lyrics/ryhmes are repetitive and obvious? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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