January 25, 200917 yr My job. To say it in other words: My boss. as some of you might know I started this apprenticeship in this music shop 3 months ago. Everything was fine until yesterday. My boss asked me for a talk between 4 eyes. He said that after 3 months there is always this decision, if I want to continue working there and if they want me to stay there. I said that I wanted to continue my apprenticeship. He said ok and told me that there is one thing he definitely doesn't like about me: My big butt! I can tell you I don't have a model butt. That's for sure. I have some kilos too much, maybe 8 or 9, but that's it! I'm not a walrus or a whale or whatever..... I'm just A WOMAN! He said that it's bad for my health and blablabla....he talked to me as if I was a woman whose weight is 150 kilos. He even asked me what my weight is and told me how many kilos I have to loose to have a chance to continue working there after my apprenticeship. Now, I don't know what to do. Actually I don't want to continue working there as if nothing happened, because I know that he will ask me every now and then if I already lost weight and how much. He's such an asshole. I wish I could tell you all the things he told me, but that would be too much. Damn it's a music shop not a gym or a table dance bar. I hate hate hate this man. I know he doesn't really care about my health. I mean, why should he? It's not that I'm mega faaaat....he just doesn't like women who have some kilos too much. Maybe he thinks that his customers think they don't want to come to the shop anymore, because there works this mega fat woman. So, he finished the conversation and I asked him what he likes about my work and what I could do better. He told me. He wouldn't have done this if I didn't asked him. I don't know what to do... it's so unreal....... such an unbelievable wanker.! Oh I forgot: He also said that if he had seen this on the day he saw me for the first time he would have found enough arguments to tell me that I can't start working there. But he didn't. He just looked into my eyes!FUCKER
January 25, 200917 yr to be perfectly honest with you... first, i would have quit that job straight away. and after that i would write a letter to my local newspaper to make that public. seriously. i've never heard anything like that!
January 25, 200917 yr Well you have to ask yourself, what's more important: Your job or your principles. And in this tough economic time, that answer may be harder to choose. But no one can decide for you. Whatever you do is your choice.
January 25, 200917 yr Tell him in a form like email or letter you will continue to work there regardless of what you weigh, appearance, etc then when he sends a reply in a form you can keep, if he says: Yes) Then you have the proof its ok No) Explore if you can do him for discrimination or something in the workplace, equal employer rights or something, I dunno. But your appearance does not effect your working ability in the job so....
January 25, 200917 yr to be perfectly honest with you... first, i would have quit that job straight away. and after that i would write a letter to my local newspaper to make that public. seriously. i've never heard anything like that! that's actually a good idea. at least threaten to go public with it
January 25, 200917 yr you're onto a winner if you reach an employment tribunal. WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN! :)
January 25, 200917 yr Author Oh shit. I'm seriously thinking about going there tomorrow or not going there. It's discrimination. Definitely. It is as if he said: I don't like your skin colour or something like that. Many people told me that I shouldn't go there anymore. sarah, you've seen me and you know for example that I am not like he describes me. I told him that I play tennis in my free- time and that I like sports. And he said that he would love to see me on the tennis court in an ironic way. He thinks he is fatser than me with his fucking 73 years,.... ahhhh why do things like that happen to me...:bigcry:
January 25, 200917 yr I told him that I play tennis in my free- time and that I like sports. And he said that he would love to see me on the tennis court in an ironic way. He thinks he is fatser than me with his fucking 73 years,.... You shouldn't have to justify yourself to him. I play tennis as well. Doesn't mean its a requirement for a job. It is discrimination, and you have to realise, its not just you, it'll happen to someone else, if I were you I'd try and stop all this happening now and for evermore before some other poor girl gets shitted off like you :sad:.
January 25, 200917 yr sarah, you've seen me and you know for example that I am not like he describes me. not at all, i know. that's why i can't believe this AT ALL. quit, julia... you don't deserve this!! but something should be done for sure, you got to tell someone who can do something about him....
January 25, 200917 yr you're onto a winner if you reach an employment tribunal. WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN! :) Listen to the man who knows everything!:)
January 25, 200917 yr Listen to the man who knows everything!:) Ian = Oracle ??? :stunned: :P I think you should quit, Julia! :)
January 25, 200917 yr Wow Julia I'm shocked! :o If I were you I would try to contact people from the IHK (Bonn? Cologne?) very soon provided that your company is registered in the "Handelsregister". They are normally responsible for all apprenticeships in Germany. As you said it's a discrimination! No one has the right to force you to lose some weight. Did you talk to your parents about it? What did they say?
January 25, 200917 yr Author I talked about it. With my mother. She couldn't believe and even started crying. Today I will call my dad. He wasn't at home yesterday.
January 25, 200917 yr Author Oh and about the thing that he will do the same with another poor girl. He already did that. There was another girl. she lost 34kg there. He says she is thankful and he is proud of it.
January 25, 200917 yr It's one thing for a doctor to advise losing some weight, but a boss has absolutely no right to say anything like that. Sue him!
January 25, 200917 yr Oh and about the thing that he will do the same with another poor girl. He already did that. There was another girl. she lost 34kg there. He says she is thankful and he is proud of it. Whaaaaat. If you do everything somebody tells you too then man, you are a sucker. Poor girl. He probably played mind games with her.... At least you have the brains to do something about this and escape ;).
January 25, 200917 yr Author he said that he asked her every week how many kilos she has already lost. In a funny way
January 25, 200917 yr I talked about it. With my mother. She couldn't believe and even started crying. Today I will call my dad. He wasn't at home yesterday. Good to know that you have already talked to your mum about it. I think now it's important not to overreact. Perhaps your dad knows what will be the best solution for you. Is your probationary period (?) "Probezeit" already over? If so you have more pull! Then your apprenticing company can only terminate without notice, if... - your attitude is undisciplined (you must have gotten a dissuation first) - you are permanently absent without permission - you steal §15 BBiG (Berufsbildungsgesetz) Otherwise it will be hard for your boss to kick you out. ;)
January 25, 200917 yr Author Good to know that you have already talked to your mum about it. I think now it's important not to overreact. Perhaps your dad knows what will be the best solution for you. Is your probationary period (?) "Probezeit" already over? If so you have more pull! Then your apprenticing company can only terminate without notice, if... - your attitude is undisciplined (you must have gotten a dissuation first) - you are permanently absent without permission - you steal §15 BBiG (Berufsbildungsgesetz) Otherwise it will be hard for your boss to kick you out. ;) I had this conversation with him, because my Probezeit is over in February. He only told me this. He didn't tell me what he likes about my work, etc...that is what I expected. I asked him when we wanted to go downstairs again. How ironical that they are very happy with my work and qualifications... I'm really scared of overreacting...that's why I don't know what to do..
January 25, 200917 yr this is almost as if he would ask you to sleep with him in order not to lose your job. would you do it? the question is, how far you allow people to go.
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