I have used irony on the internet and now I feel like a fool again HAHAHA

[נєѕυѕσηα¢нσρρєя]

Some quality white-knighting from Brent there.

 

I did respond the other night to all this but pressed back space and it went back a page thus losing everything I wrote (And it was a lot).

 

At the time I suggested that not being forward enough is the last thing I could think of why he's backed off, if anything it sounds like you might have scared him (Writing "I showed him many many many times how much I liked him" maybe that was TOO many times) I know for me personally when I'm in a pre-relationship mode (Seeing eachother but not making it official) I don't really like showing/re-iterating feelings too early. I mean saying you really like someone is one thing but if it's repeatedly, and you're saying how you have strong emotions for him etc, that's not far off being in love, or at least I'd think that if I were him. I really think that part of a relationship (Or making of a relationship) should pretty much just be fun and relaxed until it comes to that serious and deep talk of mutual feelings. That's not a law or anything but I think that's how a lot of us work, just recently a friend of mine whos been seeing someone for the past few weeks got a text about how she really misses him (Shes gone for christmas) and actually, I don't think its that strange but he was like "I've only known her a fortnight wtf" basically. I think if I repeatedly got those types of texts, or talked to about 'strong feelings', she can't sleep without me and stuff along those lines, I would really let go quite quickly, or at least tell her to calm down and see how it goes. Because that would just seem like a possibly exhausting situation.

 

So we're not mostly assholes I just think guys are slightly better at remaining calm and being able to function without the girl at the start of a relationship, but some girls tend to really take things too far in their own mind (Like saying you thought he'd be "the one"?), I mean guys can do that as well (1st girlfriend syndrome- where a guy cannot stop texting/thinking about/telling his friends every detail about his new girlfriend) but overall I'd say girls tend to do it more. If you keep having this repeatedly happen to you where the relationships over before it starts, you may be coming on really strongly, even if you don't realise it.

 

But the bottom line is that you've been hurt, by someone you haven't known for that long, and whatever the reasons are for him acting how he's acting, you should try to control yourself because you can't get that emotionally attached to someone you don't truely know yet. It takes a long time to build trust with a person (And more importantly, a lot of time spent with them) and I know at the start it can seem like a really exciting thing but you really can't get carried away, or you'll end up hurt when it's just not necessary and can be avoided. Plus if you are coming on too strongly even if you aren't trying to, if you think like this about someone it's beyond your control how you act sometimes, he'll pick up on that. He might have said he just wants a nice girl or simple girl (Can't remember what it was) and that could be you, but nothings ever that straightforward.

 

This being said, I don't think it would ruin anything if you did politely ask him if he's been busy, as you haven't heard from as much, if he shrugs it off then forget about it, just try not to confront him about it and turn it into a big deal. I don't think it would hurt for you at least give an explanation, he might even want to explain but sometimes it can be really awkward to bring something like that up and it's easier to just act like it never happened.

I totally agree with all of that!

 

We all want life to be simple and straightforward, but in love, hiding your true feelings is the way to go - keep them guessing.

 

I've found that if a man declares true love for me after a week or so, I panic and dump them.

It's a mixture of if they can fall in love SO easily, then they must be fickle and can also fall out of love easily.

Also when they say that it makes you think about your feelings for them, you realise you don't feel the same (who would after a week? lol) you wonder if you will ever feel the same and as you can't guarantee you will you have to end it before they get even more attached and you hurt them.

 

Declaring your feelings early in a relationship is NEVER a good idea, you either scare the shit out of the person or make them feel pressured that they have to feel the same.

 

You may have noticed that men you are less interested in seem to be more interested in you?

You know, the old "Why didn't Bob feel the same way about me as Fred did? That would have been perfect"

It's because you aren't that interested in Fred, you don't make yourself as available, and he has to work a bit for your attention, and people like that - the thrill of the chase.

It's not just for men btw, it's for women too, if a man is too available to me, I quickly lose interest.

 

You have to hold something back, keep them intrigued, keep them wanting to find out more until the feelings grow and a relationship develops. If a book tells you the ending of the story on page 2, you don't bother reading it do you?

Sorry, I'm addressing this to Gitta, even though I quoted Reilly lol

 

Having said that, being a bit aloof doesn't mean you let him get away with murder. If he's being cold towards you and making you feel bad, call him out on it. If you find out that it's his normal behaviour, you know he's not for you as it obviously sent you into a tailspin, you can't live your life like that.

 

All I'll say is don't pin your happiness on being with a man. Concentrate on being happy in your life and if your ideal man comes along then it's a nice bonus but not going to have you reaching for the gin and rusty razor blades if it doesn't happen.

[נєѕυѕσηα¢нσρρєя]

If I won the lotto playing with someone else and I had legally purchased the ticket, I'd buy them a loaf of bread and tell them to fuck off.

 

Only jkz, that sounds nice and fun.

:laugh3::laugh3::laugh3::laugh3:

I wouldn't even buy the loaf, I'd give them a mouldy half eaten one!

[נєѕυѕσηα¢нσρρєя]

haha still nothing....everything is pretty confusing at the moment...:wacky:

Give me his bloody number! Don't know about you, but I want to know what's going on in his head!

I'll give him a good talking to and by the end of it you'll know EXACTLY where you stand haha