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🌙 COLDPLAY ANNOUNCE MOON MUSIC OUT OCTOBER 4TH 🎵

The 'ALL NEW' Coldplay Piccie Caption Thread...


berrywoman

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  • 1 year later...
The Coldplay Documentary: Scene #142 OUTSIDE THE TOILET.

 

*In hushed tone of voice used by wildlife shows especially when they're sneaking up on a pride of lions*

 

And so, here we have the band waiting for their turns to have a go in the toilet. We must be silent.

Look at Jon's piss-resisting technique. He clearly has the strongest bladder of the lot. The expression on his face shows no sign of a need to go to the loo. Amazing.

Chris, the one with the blond mane uses the uncommon arm-clutch technique. It is rare to find a manimal who's bladder is directly connected to the nerves in the arms. Fascinating indeed.

Will Champion is clearly the brightest of the pack. He has conveniantly unzipped his pants a little bit so that it takes just that millisecond shorter to get down to business once he reaches the toilet seat. That is astounding...

Now we must be careful. The black-maned one we have named Guy is in a fragile state. Shh. He is clearly in dire need of the loo, and it seems that he has a weak bladder. Wait, hold on. He speaks.

GUY (in tiny voice): My legs feel warm. I think I wet myself

 

Episode One: Tensions run high as the lads can't find the location of the gig they are playing in Afghanistan.

 

Jonny: Oi, Champion. What are you looking at baldy? "Ooh I know where the venue is..." Idiot.

 

Will: See this is why the rhythm section don't like you guys. Stop with the intimidating please Jon...for Coldplay's sake.

 

Chris: Yo, cameraman. Taxi for this guy. He's risking breaking up our fine beat group.

 

Guy (Thinking): Yeah Chris, that's it. Play Daddy like you always do. God he makes me so angry I just wanna smack this badly laid paving slab. Now we are stuck here in the middle of nowhere with headaches and heavy hearts.

 

band058.jpg

 

Freaking hell these two are bloody hilarious!! :laugh3::laugh3:

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  • 2 months later...
i90391617_44194_2.jpg

 

Kylie: And yes for just £299.99 you too can have your very own larger than life-size Chris Martin mannequin. Dressed just like the real thing in "Parachutes" era clothing but remember order now to recieve A Rush Of Blood To The Head era white shirt and wrist strap plus for all new customers an X&Y era wig and fingertape. My favourite feature has to be the drawstring voice activation system.

 

(Pulls string)

 

Chris Mannequin: MAKE TRADE FAIR! MAKE TRADE FAIR! MAKE TRADE FAIR!

 

Kylie: The Chris comes with over 4 different phrases.

 

(Pulls string)

 

Chris: Sorry I was only paid to do one phrase...I will have to talk it over with my legal people...

 

Even if the pic is broken... :lol::lol::lol:

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