Article: 10 Worst Ways To Behave At Concerts

[Black Rose]

10 Worst Ways To Behave At Concerts: How You're Ruining It For Everyone

May 2, 2008

 

The other day I took a look at my positively RAMMED spring/summer concert calendar and my left nostril promptly flared to the size of a grapefruit. Concert season is a time for excitement, but at the same time it's a time for frustration and cynicism. These days you have to brace yourself for an experience easily ruined by the fans themselves, who (from what I've seen) have become a rude and unruly lot entirely unaware of everyone else's personal space. I now present you with ten rules that people blatantly disobey, or, ways that you're ruining it for everyone else.

 

1. Recording the show or incessantly taking photos with your cell phone. I honestly don't know why people do this. The photo quality of the majority of cell phones is terrible. I certainly didn't pay $30-100 for my ticket just to watch it through a 3x2 inch screen with your extended arm as an obstruction, why did you? Are you honestly ever going to look at those photos again? And when you do, will you even be able to recognize the tiny speck that's centre stage as Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys? Will you be able to tell you're at a Spice Girls reunion concert instead of the New Kids On the Block reunion concert? No. Ditto for people who record entire songs on a shitty camera for future uploading to YouTube. 90% of these videos are unwatchable. Check out this "sweet" four-and-a-half minute footage from a recent Yelle show that someone shot and uploaded for our viewing pleasure. In case you couldn't make it out, the song Yelle's performing in the clip is "Je Veux Te Voir".

 

2. Waiting until the show has started to secure your spot in the front row. People line up outside general admission venues hours, sometimes even DAYS, before the show in order to snag that prime spot from which to enjoy a show that they've likely been waiting to see for much longer than you. In the Land of the Fair, It's called waiting your f**king turn. So when one is rammed at the front, standing shoulder to shoulder with thousands of sweaty mouth breathers is uncomfortable enough without your conga line of friends charging through the crowd claiming, "Oh, my friend's up there!". It's like when you're late for a movie and making a huge production of finding a seat after the lights have gone down. It's rude. And no, if you've scored a front row spot, you cannot ever leave to use the washroom or get a drink. You've sealed your fate - you'll never make your way back.

 

"Hey! Can you hear this? It's Pearl Jam. This is what you're missing. Wish you were here. OMG do you hear? They're playing Even Flow. Listen!!" *puts phone up to speaker*

 

3. Talking throughout the entire show. Speaking of rude: No one's saying you have to stand there like a wax statue with your arms folded, intently concentrating on every lyric and chord. But we could do without the people who feel the need to constantly natter to their friends throughout the show, especially at smaller shows where the band can HEAR you not paying attention. There have even been shows where the band stopped playing to ask people to STFU. Embarrraaaaaassssing! It's like people who talk in class...why are you even there? Go stand at the back near the bar if you want to chat.

 

4. Being over 6'4 and choosing to stand in front of the shortest person in the crowd. You can't fault people for being tall (or too short), but why does the tallest person usually have a complete disregard for where they're standing? If you see a 5'0 tall girl, don't stand directly in front of her. Maybe kneel? Maybe lop off your legs at the shins? Or better yet, maybe just stand behind her? The same goes for girls who insist on sitting on their boyfriends' shoulders for the duration of the show. The band might appreciate it when you show them your boobies, but the entire audience behind you will just think you're a boob. Thanks for blocking my view, dink.

 

5. Continually crowd surfing or slam dancing even though it's not that kind of show. You can only be dropped straight to the ground and then hoisted back up so many times by your fellow concert-goers before it gets exhausting for everyone involved. Some people are actually trying to enjoy themselves and not worry about getting an errant boot or elbow to the head while trying to gently guide you towards safety. Save it for Lollapalooza or some other monster UK festival. Ditto to people who mosh and slamdance at shows like Crystal Castles or Klaxons. Don't make me show you the black eye I got at a seemingly "tame" Malajube show.

 

6. Being an unruly lout. Everyone knows all about the one dude who stands at the back of the venue and yells "WOOO! YES!!!" during the band's between-song banter and at the start of every song, regardless of whether he can recognize it. What's worse is when that dude brings along all of his rabblerousing buddies, and they get to the venue early to get their drink on. By the time the show starts they're slurring their words and sloshing their drinks, bumping into people and stomping on toes. Get a hold of yourselves, people! Try to make it to the encore without blacking out, please.

 

7. Spastic dancing and general disregard for personal space. We know you wanna dance. And we WANT you to dance and have a good time. But take a moment to look around and size up the amount of space you have to work with and adjust your movement accordingly. If it's Daft Punk and everyone's going ballastic, go ahead and join in. If the crowd's tightly packed and there's no room to dance, bop along, maybe try to start a mini-dance party, but now's not the time to start flipping your hair like a stripper, breakdancing or practising the Soulja Boy dance.

 

8. Holding up a sign or flag for the duration of the show. This practice is especially popular at any British indie band show. Suddenly everyone's a raving fan of the Union Jack and has brought along a humongous silk flag to prove it. Not only that, but they want to make sure the band is aware of their nationalism. Then you have the people who write deeply personal messages for the band on bristolboard and hold it up in the hopes that the guitarist will fall in love with them. Nope - the only thing you'll feel from behind is hate.

 

9. Standing at a seated venue. Look, I go to a lot of shows. Almost all of them are general admission/standing. I look forward to sitting at the 10% of venues that have seats. So for the love of god, please don't LEAP out of your seat the moment the band hits the stage and remain standing for the entire set. Stand for a couple of songs and then sit back down. The domino effect is really strong on this one - it's kind of hard to convince an entire audience to sit down, and once one row is up, others are sure to follow, meaning anyone who's too tired or short to see anything while standing won't get to see anything if they stay in their seats.

 

10. Waiting till the band plays their radio hit and then leaving . A lot of times the band comes to town early in their career and they already know that you only came to see them for one song. But humour them and feign some interest in the rest of their material - it's all near and dear to them; it just happens that one of their songs is being pimped out by their label or the local radio station. Several tours later, they're probably already sick of playing it anyway, and want you to latch onto something new. If they haven't saved it for the encore, after which there would be a natural exit break, don't start a mass exodus out of the venue. The other songs might crash and burn, but emergency exits should only be used in case of actual fire.

 

Anything else that's ruining your live show experience that I've missed here?

 

http://blog.muchmusic.com/archives/2008/05/10_worst_ways_t.php

[winigwl]

i agree with number 10. so many people did that at the verve concert. it made me want to vomit

[bart]

brillant work D

[Black Rose]

Number 11:

Getting into the venue early to get a good spot, only to stand around for 90 or so minutes before the support band comes on.

 

Number 12:

Having to stand around for an hour or so after the support band finishes and the main band come on, watching the roadies test the equipment.

 

Number 13:

Doesn't apply so much these days, but in the days pre smoking ban, getting stuck next to someone who couldn't go 5 minutes without having a fag.

[Lore]

4. Being over 6'4 and choosing to stand in front of the shortest person in the crowd. You can't fault people for being tall (or too short), but why does the tallest person usually have a complete disregard for where they're standing? If you see a 5'0 tall girl, don't stand directly in front of her. Maybe kneel? Maybe lop off your legs at the shins? Or better yet, maybe just stand behind her?

 

 

that happens to me at every concert :bigcry:

 

 

interesting article, Dave

[TraceOddity]

The only one I have a small disagreement with is #1. I don't take pics all through the show, and that would be annoying. But I do want to have a few snaps just to prove I was there. If I can peek around the people in front of beside me without disrupting their experience then it's all good.

 

TOTALLY agree with everything else though.

[Black Rose]

*quickly hides link*

[Black Rose]

Number 14 - Overpriced soft-drinks

 

Come-on, £2,00 for a small cup of draught cola, normally mixed wrong so it's watery.

 

Number 15 -

Idiots who though cups of piss/drink around during the show and after the show

[TraceOddity]

#16 - People who heckle the support act just because they've never heard them/don't like them. If the headliner wants them there, they're worth my time and attention. Let me enjoy them!

 

(It's how I've discovered a LOT of new bands.)

[Black Rose]

Yep, some support acts are wonderful. Shame the crowd sometimes can't be fucked to listen.

 

Dave's top support acts:

1 - Blackbud, supporting Fortune Drive at Bath Moles

2 - The Redwalls

3 - Editors

4 - Polytechnic

5 - Morning Runner

6 - Little Flames

 

Plus some more which i can't remember

[Bombadil]

Good read. I can pretty much agree with all of them.

[twistedlogic149]

Saw this on digg, pretty funny.

[StarsKay]

:laugh3: That's hilarious, mainly because I have seen just about all of those happen. Nice one Dave.

[Cobalt]

i hart this article :laugh3:

[TraceOddity]

I have to say though, I've experienced a smaller amount of that stuff at Coldplay shows. The fans always seem to want to make the experience as good for each other as for themselves.

 

Having said that, my best friend did the 'Phone call during the song' during Fix You in Toronto, and it drove me nuts...esp. since we were in the FRONT ROW!

 

The only really negative Coldplay show I was at was River Rave in Boston. A lot of fans were there to see other bands, and only came to heckle Coldplay. If you've heard the boot, you can actually hear people yelling 'England sucks! Go back to your country!' and things like that. It was so bad the band were talking about calling it quits after that set. Glad they've toughened up over the years.:)

[Viva La Violet Hill]

#9 is the big one for me. I've had bad experiences with that one.

[Black Rose]

I would guess number 9 is more for America, where most gigs are all seated.

 

You see it with number 1, as where I tend to stand at a particular venue is on the balcony (so you can see the entire stage, as it's wide), you see people in the downstairs area when they are not getting pushed around trying to take photos/videos.

[Black Rose]

Number 16 - Fucking idiots who talk all the way though the support acts, seriously I want to listen to music not the latest goings on about whose shagging whom.

 

Number 17 - Mainly for seated areas, people who go to the bar again and again during the main set, seriously at the P-Tree gig last saturday there was someone in my row who got up a good 3 times during the P-Tree set to go to the bar and get drinks. Seriously why bother going if you can't survive 30 minutes without an overpriced lager?

[EmmaLouiseSmyth]

Number 11.

Smoking weed

>.<

 

( for outdoor gigs )

[Black Rose]

Smoking outright in outdoor concerts.

 

Thank god for the smoking ban

[EmmaLouiseSmyth]

D:

I hated that about the coldplay concert i went to,

It was an outdoor one,

and everyone was lighting up every ten minutes.

 

and when they went to play billie jean ....

D: they all started smoking >.<

[Black Rose]

It was the only downsize to end of the road, all the damn smokers in the garden stage arena.

 

Ah well, they do provide an overall benefit to the health system