...according to the Daily Mail.

 

AGE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-449783/Women-birth-age-30-double-risk-breast-cancer.html

AIR POLLUTION http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-358875/Pollution-cars-linked-child-cancer.html

AIR TRAVEL http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-200443/Frequent-fliers-raise-cancer-risk.html and http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/article-591109/Cancer-risk-frequent-fliers.html

ALCOHOL http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-147083/Drink-day-increases-breast-cancer-risk.html and http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-471910/Bowel-cancer-danger-just-glass-wine-day.html

ALLERGIES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-324732/Child-allergies-raise-cancer-risk.html

ARTIFICIAL FLAVOURS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-55023/Cancer-causing-chemicals-soy-sauce.html

ARTIFICIAL LIGHT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-391267/Artificial-light-increases-breast-cancer-risk.html

ASBESTOS (as if it wasn’t bad enough already) http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1170584/Asbestos-schools-kill-pupils-warns-teacher-dying-lung-cancer.html

ASPIRIN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-205490/Asprin-link-cancer-risk.html

BABIES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-157683/Birth-size-link-breast-cancer.html

BABY BOTTLES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1038697/EU-rejects-ban-baby-bottles-linked-early-puberty-breast-cancer-miscarriage-infertility.html

BABY FOOD http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-199887/Baby-food-cancer-alert.html

BACON http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1102368/Additives-used-bacon-ham-chicken-make-cancers-grow.html

BARBEQUES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-326153/Australians-warned-backyard-cancer-risk.html

BEEF http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-393666/Alarm-beef-link-breast-cancer.html

BEER http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1161843/Just-pint-beer-day-raise-risk-prostate-cancer.html

BEING A BLACK PERSON http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1064547/Black-men-times-likely-prostate-cancer.html and http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-508753/Black-women-develop-breast-cancer-decades-earlier-white-women.html

BEING A WOMAN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-63976/Cancer-risk-higher-women-smokers.html

BEING A MAN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-306543/Men-twice-likely-die-cancer-women.html

BEING SOUTHERN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1027331/Why-affluent-women-South-likely-die-breast-cancer.html

BISCUITS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-126342/Cancer-foods-avoid.html

BLOWJOBS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-453843/Oral-sex-cause-throat-cancer.html

BRAS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-182370/Is-bra-bad-you.html

BREAD http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-411506/White-bread-increases-cancer-risk.html

BREAST FEEDING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-178756/Whos-risk-breast-cancer.html

BREAST IMPLANTS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-41443/Breast-implants-cancer-scare.html

BROKEN HEARTS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-450049/How-heart-broken-grief-send-early-grave.html

BUBBLE BATH http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-403703/Is-bubble-bath-safe.html

BURGERS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-467360/Cancer-scare-food-colour-added-sausages-burgers.html

CAFFINE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1127473/Coffee-raise-child-cancer-risk-New-evidence-caffeine-damage-babies-DNA.html

CALCUIM http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1052127/Fatal-cancer-risk-men-high-blood-calcium-levels-say-US-researchers.html

CANDLE-LIT DINNERS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1207726/Candles-release-scents-laced-cancer-chemicals-warn-scientists.html#ixzz0dufFps6a

CANNED FOOD http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-44676/Gender-bending-chemicals-tin-cans.html

CARBOHYDRATES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-313227/Low-carb-diets-beat-breast-cancer.html

CARS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-358875/Pollution-cars-linked-child-cancer.html

CEREAL http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-115696/How-safe-favourite-foods.html

CHEESE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1002424/Italy-shuts-mozzarella-production-toxin-fears-spread.html

CHICKEN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-429303/Families-risk-toxic-imported-foods.html

CHILDLESSNESS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/columnists/article-474820/SUZANNE-MOORE-Im-sick-told-fault.html

CHILDREN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-506501/Prostate-risk-having-family-according-new-study.html

CHILDREN’S FOODhttp://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-201390/Health-warning-childrens-food.html

CHILLIS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-347287/Cancer-checks-spices-new-food-dyes-alert.html

CHINESE MEDICINE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-75547/Warming-cancer-risk-Chinese-medicines.html

CHIPS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-487571/Parents-told-chips-cause-cancer.html

CHLORINE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-431777/Chlorine-bathwater-linked-cancer.html

CHOCLATE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-386625/Cancer-fears-chocolate-snacks.html

CITY LIVING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-496495/City-life-blamed-higher-risk-breast-cancer.html

CLIMATE CHANGE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-452789/Warmer-climate-mean-thousands-deaths-skin-cancer.html

COCA COLA http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-337178/Carrot-day-reduces-cancer-risk.html

COD LIVER OIL http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-379918/Cancer-fears-cod-liver-oil-capsules.html

COFFEE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3027/How-healthy-cup-coffee.html

CONSTAPATION http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-193698/Atkins-diet-cancer-risk.html

CONTRACEPTIVE PILLS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-181273/Cancer-risk-45-higher-Pill.html

COOKING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-382571/Frying-increase-cancer-risk.html

CORDLESS PHONES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-515970/After-cancer-warnings-mobiles-home-phone-putting-health-danger.html

CRAYONS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6706/Safety-alert-best-selling-crayons.html

CURRY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-342632/Cancer-dye-Grossman-curry-sauce.html

DEODRANT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-205705/Deodorants-linked-cancer.html

DIETING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-73056/Is-diet-lifestyle-putting-risk-breast-cancer.html

DOGS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-490581/Can-dogs-breast-cancer-Bizarre-medical-theories-experts-claim-actually-true.html

EGGS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-50995/Cancer-chemicals-eggs.html

ELECTRICITY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-449679/Power-lines-link-cancer-new-alert.html

ENGLISH BREAKFAST http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1049142/Traditional-English-fry-raise-risk-bowel-cancer-63-cent.html

FACEBOOK http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1149207/How-using-Facebook-raise-risk-cancer.html

FALSE NAILS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1174768/Having-nails-skin-cancer-doctors-warn-women.html

FATHERHOOD http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-506501/Prostate-risk-having-family-according-new-study.html

FIBRE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4903/Fibre-cancer-risk-warning.html

FISH http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-117840/Fish-cancer-scare.html

FIZZY DRINKS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1249305/Two-fizzy-drinks-week-raise-chance-getting-pancreatic-cancer-87.html

FLIP FLOPS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1025915/Wearing-FLIP-FLOPS-skin-cancer-doctors-warn.html

FLY SPRAY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-459938/Using-pesticide-sprays-home-double-risk-brain-tumours.html

FRUIT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-371260/Breast-cancer-drug-cuts-death-risk.html

GARDENS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-326153/Australians-warned-backyard-cancer-risk.html

GRAPEFRUIT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-468559/Eating-grapefruit-increase-breast-cancer-risk-third.html

HAIR DYE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1017259/How-using-hair-dye-increase-risk-cancer.html

HAM http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-490845/Is-safe-eat-Cancer-report-adds-bacon-ham-drink-danger-list.html

HEIGHT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1064454/Bigger-taller-baby-girls-higher-risk-breast-cancer-says-study.html

HONEY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-429303/Families-risk-toxic-imported-foods.html

HOT DRINKS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-115696/How-safe-favourite-foods.html

HRT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1214782/HRT-increases-risk-dying-lung-cancer.html#ixzz0dueJ7qOY

INTERNET http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-312505/Cancer-patients-risk-websites.html

IVF http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-148228/How-IVF-raises-cancer-risks.html

KIDNEY TRANSPLATS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-459097/TV-prize-kidney-carries-risk-cancer.html

LAMB http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-446559/Red-meat-link-higher-risk-breast-cancer.html

LARGE HEADS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-370870/Big-headed-babies-prone-cancer.html

LEFT-HANDEDNESS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-363477/Left-handers-likely-breast-cancer.html

LIPSTICK http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-499967/Is-lipstick-giving-cancer.html

LIVER TRANSPLANTS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-207838/Cancer-liver-transplant-killed-husband.html

MENOPAUSE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-395201/Weight-gain-menopause-increases-breast-cancer-risk.html

MENSTRUATION http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-68946/Do-women-need-periods.html

METAL http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1081692/The-metals-daily-glass-wine-linked-cancer-Parkinsons.html

MILK http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-328863/Milk-linked-ovarian-cancer.html

MOBILE PHONES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-473553/Orange-remove-mobile-mast-tower-doom-cancer-rate-soared.html

MODERN LIVING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-474157/Modern-living-blame-cancer-epidemic.html

MONEY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1025375/Wealthy-background-raise-risk-cancer-teenagers.html

MORPHINE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1230208/Pain-drug-morphine-cause-cancer-spread.html#ixzz0dudlHqN2

MOUTHWASH http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1113422/Mouthwash-causes-oral-cancer-pulled-supermarkets-say-experts.html

NUCLEAR POWER (there is no hint of irony in this article) http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-42066/New-study-links-nuclear-sites-cancer.html

OBESITY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-245997/Obesity-raises-risk-cancer.html

OESTROGEN http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-4098/Oestrogen-link-breast-cancer.html

OLDER FATHERs http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1223025/Why-older-fathers-likely-children-genetic-disorders.html#ixzz0dudLlJsP

PASTRY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-115696/How-safe-favourite-foods.html

PEANUT BUTTER http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1164417/Food-watchdog-warning-peanut-butter-brand-containing-cancer-causing-fungus.html

PERFUME http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1051130/How-perfumes-scented-creams-make-unborn-baby-infertile.html

PICKLES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-115696/How-safe-favourite-foods.html

PIZZA http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-341698/New-food-dye-warning.html

PLASTIC BAGS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1207840/Plastic-decomposes-sea-releases-cancer-causing-chemicals-study-warns.html#ixzz0duexZlFs

PORK http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1093039/After-alert-Irish-pork-safe-beef.html

POTATOES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-115037/Cancer-chemical-link-cooked-food.html

POVERTY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/columnists/article-474820/SUZANNE-MOORE-Im-sick-told-fault.html

PREGNANCY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-82458/Breast-cancer-risk-career-women.html

RADIOACTIVITY http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-421140/As-radioactive-spy-buried-bar-staff-served-facing-cancer-risk.html

RICE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-444222/Rice-tainted-arsenic-raises-risk-cancer.html

SAUSAGES http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-550729/Why-eating-just-sausage-day-raises-cancer-risk-20-cent.html

RETIREMENT http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1220446/Oh-Work-good-especially-youve-retired.html#ixzz0ducbviCE

SEX http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-191219/Did-sex-cancer.html

SHAVING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-206459/Shaving-raise-cancer-risk.html

SKIING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-206243/Skiers-warned-cancer-risk.html

SOUP http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1132814/Salty-soups-increase-cancer-risk-says-expert.html

SPACE TRAVEL http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1015482/How-astronauts-risk-cancer--premature-ageing--travelling-space.html

SUN CREAM http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/article-592076/Cancer-fear-childrens-sun-creams.html

TALCUM POWDER http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1063040/Cancer-alert-talc-Women-using-powder-day-risk.html

TEA http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-87131/Too-tea-treble-cancer-risk-women.html

TEEN SEX http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1237530/Girls-sex-teens-greater-risk-developing-cervical-cancer.html#ixzz0dudvXOF7

THIRD HAND SMOKE (read article and you'll understand) http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1249591/Even-hand-smoke-dangerous--especially-children.html

VITAMINS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-320006/Vitamin-pills-cause-early-deaths.html

WATER http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-13620/Cancer-link-tap-water-radon-hotspots.html

WI-FI http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-456534/The-classroom-cancer-risk-wi-fi-internet.html

WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-338899/Dye-alert-spreads-school-meals.html

WORKING http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1031934/Why-men-desk-jobs-higher-risk-prostate-cancer.html

X-RAYS http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-207035/X-rays-bring-risk-cancer.html

:clap:

 

Brilliant thread.

So basically all that is good and bad in life. Great. How do you avoid the childlessness, AND children part? both ways give you cancer apparently...

LOL

Happiness gives you cancer.

It seems that pretty much everything gives you cancer

 

 

 

I see it's all by THE DAILY MAIL (Mark's fav. source):

 

[ame=

]

[/ame]

It seems that pretty much everything gives you cancer

 

 

 

I see it's all by THE DAILY MAIL (Mark's fav. source):

 

 

Well it's a joke about the daily mail.

ah... gotcha

Click the links guys, the headlines are hilarious.

I love you.

Left-handedness? :wtf:

 

Thanks for the list :lol:

Where did you find that collection?

If that's the truth,

i might aswell just kill myself if i don't want to get cancer.

 

 

Well, i better stop wearing bras, eating potatoes and

 

 

Wait Oestrogen? Wtf?

 

 

:laugh3: What a fucked up newspaper.

Dp

Shaving? lol

Left-handedness? :wtf:

Oh well then I'm screwed, because I'm left-handed and I'm black.

hahaha Blowjobs cause cancer. Now I know why porn stars die young.

No more Plastic Bags for me!

these titles are hilarious! :lol:

:lol:

X ray? LOLWATOMGLMAOWUT.

Try Chernobyl.

Now I have an excuse not to wear bras. THEY GIVE YOU CANCER

 

Glad to see the staples in there too (mobile phones etc)

Haha this really made my day...

I just read this in english class and showed my teacher and we all talked about how funny this is for the entire period.

thank goodness i'm short.

Third-hand smoke? WTF? :lol: