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Why you shouldn't strip at a Coldplay concert


Blue Nails

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Found a hilarious article:

 

 

Coldplay fan Robert Kiunisala, 34, stripped during Brisbane concert and bit security guard

 

 

BRISBANE'S biggest Coldplay fan has relayed to a court how he was overcome by a "primal urge" during the UK supergroup's recent concert that drove him to strip off and bite a security guard so hard he drew blood.

 

Robert John Kiunisala, 34, pleaded guilty in the Brisbane Magistrates Court on Wednesday to obstructing police, being a public nuisance, failing to leave a licensed premises, obstructing a licensee and assault occasioning bodily harm as a result of a bizarre series of events that took place at Suncorp Stadium on November 21.

 

Police prosecutor Sgt Sharon Carruthers said Kiunisala came to the attention of security guards at the Coldplay concert after he took off his clothes over several songs until he'd stripped down to just his underwear about 10pm.

 

She told the court Kiunisala removed his underwear when he noticed security guards coming towards him.

 

They soon became involved in a scuffle with the now naked man.

 

Sgt Carruthers said the naked defendant bit one of the security guards on the hand.

 

The bite drew blood and required medical treatment, she said.

 

Defence lawyer Michael McMillan, for Kiunisala, said his client wasn't intoxicated by drugs or alcohol at the time of the offence but rather had ''extreme feelings'' for the group.

 

He tendered a letter to the court from his client's partner that drew a picture of a normally upstanding man whose behaviour on the night was out of character.

 

Magistrate Liz Hall said she accepted the defendant wasn't intoxicated when he was at the concert but added he needed to ''obtain some knowledge about why you would behave in such a fashion''.

 

She said he'd been violent on the night but the fact he had no previous convictions of a like nature meant he shouldn't serve jail time.

 

She ordered Kiunisala to serve a two-year probation order and pay $800 compensation to the injured security guard.

 

No conviction was recorded.

 

460822-robert-kiunisala-coldplay-stripper.jpg

Coldplay fan Robert Kiunisala, 34, said he was overcome

with a 'primal urge' that drove him to strip during the band's concert

in Brisbane. Picture: Brooke Baskin Source: The Courier-Mail

 

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:wtf:

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^:lol: Instead of "NOW MAKE SOME NOOOOOOISE", he must have heard "NOW TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OOOOOOOFFFF"

 

 

He might have interpreted "noise" as "NOISE in the media" in the meaning of make the headlines so he "obeyed" and took off his clothes. So in that sense "Coldplay made him do it". Something like that I suppose.

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  • 7 months later...

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