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The Darkness


Reilly

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It depresses me that they're doing "good" now.

 

Surely one of you have heard of them, the lead singer is butt ugly but wears these ripping off Stephen Tyler slit-front spandex outfits and wants to be a sex symbol. He also has incredibly high vocals (From his crotch being crushed into his suit) and plays guitar (Not impressively).

 

And the rest of the band stand in his skinny, hairy shadow. So basically, they're a Hair Metal band. And they're afraid to admit it, claiming to be Hard Rock (I dont even know what that is anymore! Im sure they dont either).

 

I saw them at the Wittness Festival about a year before I first saw them on TV, they were one of the first bands. By this time there was only a small amount of people there, pushed up against the barricade, probably only about 15 rows of us, it was early. When they came on I cracked up and started laughing, REALLY loudly, and there was only one row of people pushed up against the barricade infront of me, so I was near the front. I just had to laugh, the lead singer just looked so fucking terrible. I laughed the whole way through "Get Your hands off my woman" it was hilarious, but everyone around me was getting into it, probably because they were all my age and most kids my age dont understand how terrible Hair Metal was, they probably thought The Darkness were being original (ugh).

 

Everyone was like "WOW" when the lead singer stopped doing the splits and picked up a guitar and played a shanty solo, I couldnt play guitar very well at the time but even then I could tell the solo was so fucking basic, and unfortunately for me everyone around me was really digging them after that. But I just kept laughing, in between songs I laughed extra hard to get my point across and the bass player began to look a little pissed off, the lead singer didnt acknowledge me much and everyone around me started getting a little pissed off too. It was fun being an *sshole, The Darkness deserve it.

 

And NOW look at them... Actually theyre not doing THAT well. Holy shippit they got a top *20* single! Now the Amp and MTV2 are like fucking having heart attacks, theyre next song could easily bomb.

 

Let me remember some lyrics, hmm, poetically deep?

 

"Girl I cant get rid of you!

Dont know what to dooo ooh"

 

"Getchya hands off o my wooo ooohman hey MY WOMAN"

 

"Youre really growing on me! *Youre really growing on-* Youre really growing on mee-hee, girl cant you see?"

 

'Youre really growing on me' is the 2nd released single, and it was pathetic of how proud they were of that video. Anyone see it? It features about a million things happening, The Darkness arriving infront of a castle out of an alien ship in pod form, then they break out of pod form and get into a heli copter with two 8 year olds driving, and they fly the Darkness to ANOTHER castle (What the point of it was, I do not know). Then they play music in a bathroom, the lead singer just HAS to be naked, then they meet a chick outside and they ride a horse, then they shoot down two ducks with their guitars outside of the castle, then out of nowhere a headshot of the lead singer as hes suddenly suspended in the air, and the camera moves back a little and shows that the cheap legs of a flying dragon (Puppet legs) then the dragon drops him... Next scene the lead singer is on a bed, naked. And THATS only after the first chorus, it gets even more fucked up.

 

They're just terrible, bad terrible, I dont do this kinda post much (Im just so Zen) but this band merit it. The Darkness, I salute you, for being so terrible.

 

I have way too much time on my hands.

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  • 8 months later...

The darkness owns! :O (wtf?)

 

K, this is kinda weird.

 

I went to my band-mate's house last week and he was like "holy crap thomas, i downloaded this totally awesome video. I think we should cover this song" and i was like "Ok, let's see it then" and guess what song he downloaded?

 

The darkness - i believe in a thing called love :stunned:

 

And the bad thing is that i really got into the song. :embarrased: The video is totally funny... and the lyrics are cool too. haha

Ok, kill me now... but give another chance to the darkness. Like, they're assholes, they're gay...

But damn, their video is funny.

:cool:

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hahah what's cool about the darkness is that their video looks like something that me and my friends could've done. like, it's so cheap and funny. Gotta luv that part where the vocalist fights that giant monster and throws that big plastic rock at the monster. hah classic

 

And ah, i dont think you guys should hate em just cos they dissed coldplay and radiohead. They obviously did that to get the media's attention. Something similar to what the gallagher brothers do.. but way more rude.

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I just don't like that style of music that's all

 

Yea, same here. i dont even know why i like "i believe in a thing called love". But ah damn, it's so cool. hah

 

i suppose you don't like queen then?

 

Ah, queen is kinda cool. I like a few songs.

 

There are lots of other ways to get attention.

 

Yea, that's true. You can save the rainforest or diss other bands. It all depends on your mood, i guess.

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