Corkus

...implying that Mylo Xyloto was something to look forward to. :laugh3::rolleyes: But I think I was right after predicting "Spectrum" would be the best song of the year after only hearing 30 seconds. Will wait for studio versions of all songs, of course, for final judgement.

I'm settling on a generous 4 at the moment, which happens to be the same number of songs I legitimately enjoy on the album. Those 4 songs being: Charlie Brown Us Against the World Up in Flames Up With the Birds You might ask "Wait Michael, didn't you also only enjoy 4 songs on Viva, which you still gave a 5/10 or 6/10 to? How is MX that much worse?" While this is true, MX's lows are far lower than VLV's lows. I thought a lot of the stuff on VLV was mediocre, but the only two songs I outright hated were "42" and "Yes". On MX, quite a few of the songs are outright intolerable, with ETIAW, "Princess of China", and "Paradise" being 3 of the 5 worst songs they've ever done. And what could have been good songs - tracks like "Hurts Like Heaven" and "Major Minus" - were ruined by poor production decisions. "U.F.O." isn't a bad track but has an exaggerated quality thanks to being in the worst stretch of the album, so it mainly stands out for being inoffensive. "Moving to Mars" would have been a better inclusion, and after listening to the album in full, I still see no reason for it to be cut other than fitting more pop/R&B/dance tracks on the album. DLIBYH isn't too awful (though its name is) but I think "Charlie Brown" is still the only song that actually hit a successful pure pop enjoyment factor. Overall, a very disappointing effort by a band that was my life soundtrack and had been gradually losing me the last few years...and now I fear I've lost them altogether. Time for me to move on in life. :)

I think ETIAW barely edges out PoC, but yes, I hate this even more than Paradise. (all 3 are in my bottom 5) I hate Lost+ but at least 75% of that is still a Coldplay song.

So do you want me to say "AROBTTH is super gay" instead? :laugh3:

Mylo Xyloto is the gayest Coldplay album ever. :D

Just had a second listen. Now comes the part where I slowly delete tracks from my iTunes and leave only the ones I enjoy, which there may be 4 or 5 of by the end. Second listen impression changes? UATW is the clear album standout. Studio enhancements were minimal and don't detract at all from the acoustic moments. I'm not sure "U.F.O." is as good as I originally thought, though. It's more of a welcome breather in the midst of an absolutely terrible stretch of the album and wouldn't pass as anything more than a B-side during AROBTTH or even during X&Y. ("Moving to Mars" would have been a better inclusion.) So that leaves "Charlie Brown", "Us Against the World", "Up in Flames", and "Up With the Birds" as the only MX tracks I enjoy, and of those, only UATW and UWTB hold up with Coldplay's best material. That's also about how many tracks I really enjoyed on Viva, but MX's low points are lower than VLV's low points.

I can't settle on a numerical ranking at the moment. It won't be a nice number, though.

Hurts Like Heaven: 4/10 Paradise: 2/10 Charlie Brown: 7/10 Us Against The World: 9/10 Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall: 1/10 Major Minus: 3/10 U.F.O.: 7/10 Princess of China: 1/10 Up in Flames: 7/10 Don't Let It Break Your Heart: 6/10 Up With The Birds: 8/10 I've given my sparkles and sunshine reasons in other posts already. ^.^

Princess of China does legitimately challenge ETIAW as the worst Coldplay song of all time. So at least you can be comfortable knowing the remainder of the album isn't QUITE as awful.

Biggest Disappointment (because there are many disappointments) - Hurts Like Heaven. I know we had a live backing track that was really distorted and were hoping it wouldn't be indicative of the studio version. Well, too bad. Ugh. Biggest surprise - Us Against the World. I made sure not to judge this one too much live because it was fully acoustic, whereas we knew the studio version would have a fair bit more production. But they thankfully restrained themselves in most areas and it's a candidate for my favorite on the album.

AROBTTH Parachutes X&Y Viva la Vida Mylo Xyloto

I'll be lazy and C+P this from WoM: - Starting the download. Wasn't even remotely difficult to find a leak (if you can't find it, you aren't trying). - MX opener...whatever...doesn't last long enough to make any positive or negative impression like Life in Technicolor. - So...I was right about Hurts Like Heaven studio autotune? FUCK. Oh well, at least I can now shove it in the face of every single user who told me "STFU moron, Coldplay is too talented to use autotune!" - Everyone who compares this to "Keep the Car Running" is dumb. KTCR is infinitely better. - Paradise comes this early in the album? At least I can get it out of the way... - Oh fuck, I forgot how much I hated this song. - "We're just a pair o', pair o', pair o' guys...me and Jonny Buckland...oh wait, you can't hear anything by Jonny in this song because the synths are so overbearing!" - Good to know Coldplay writes club anthems now. Yet another reason never to go to clubs (I'm serious, I HATE clubs). - Studio Charlie Brown! I liked the live versions I heard but it wasn't the second coming of Clocks like everyone insists. - I might legitimately like Charlie Brown if it weren't for that dumb "All the boys, all the girls" sequence. Oh well, least painful song so far. It's pure pop but done in a more positive manner. - Us Against the World...first one I have positive expectations for...let's see... - Chris's deep voice is a mixed bag, but I will say it works better here than on "Yes" on VLV (one of my least favorite Coldplay songs ever) - Oh good, they kept Will's part on studio. I'm liking this one so far. - Okay, UATW is the first good track on the album. I'm not a fan of a few of the vocal moments, but they're minor complaints compared to my other complaints on the album. - MMIX...okay? Huh? - IT WAS A WA-WA-WA-WA-WA-TURD-FALL - I turn the music up, I put my records on, I punch some babies listening to this horrid song - I don't know about you, but I'd rather be a full stop than a comma. I don't know what that means but it sounds way cooler. - Major Minus FUCK THIS SONG. This is not a good song, people. Stop convincing yourselves it is. - Without the vocal distortion, this one would be bearable but not great. With it, it's just another "experiment" gone awry. (and it's not much of an "experiement" either) - The "ooh, ooh" moments are officially Chris's most irritating vocals of all time. - UFO. First track I know nothing about yet. - Feels like an early B-side, which is actually a welcome thing by this point. Short and sweet. - It segues into Princess of China? Frick. - Bold statement time - PoC is the second worst song Coldplay has ever done (ETIAW being the first worst). - As I said last night, I'd hate this less if it were on a Rihanna album and were labeled "Rihanna (feat. Chris Martin)". - And as also said last night, Rihanna isn't even the #1 reason this song is horrible. She might not even be in the Top 5 reasons this song is horrible. - I have a shred of hope for Up in Flames. Please don't disappoint me. - Weird echo effect on Chris's voice, but it's not as bad of an effect as on HLH or MM. - That was...okay. Just because it's stripped down doesn't automatically make it good, so I think UATW achieved this a bit better. Not awful, though. - Not much to say about these intermission pieces like AHT. - 2 seconds into "Don't Let It Break Your Heart Because We Couldn't Possibly Come Up With a Worse Track Name Than This" and I can tell this is going to be divisive. - Certainly less of an atrocity than Paradise or ETIAW but isn't anywhere near as convincing of a catchy pop song as Charlie Brown. - Ending things with Up With the Birds - Not a bad closer. Not too bombastic. It may not be Amsterdam, but Coldplay is now 5-for-5 with album closers. Shame I'm so down about the rest of the album. I'll let this one settle in, along with a final score and more solid thoughts about songs in the latter half. But I'm comfortable saying this is my least favorite effort yet. Gonna go re-listen to the new My Brightest Diamond album now.

- Starting the download. Wasn't even remotely difficult to find a leak (if you can't find it, you aren't trying). - MX opener...whatever...doesn't last long enough to make any positive or negative impression like Life in Technicolor. - So...I was right about Hurts Like Heaven studio autotune? FUCK. Oh well, at least I can now shove it in the face of every single user who told me "STFU moron, Coldplay is too talented to use autotune!" - Everyone who compares this to "Keep the Car Running" is dumb. KTCR is infinitely better. - Paradise comes this early in the album? At least I can get it out of the way... - Oh fuck, I forgot how much I hated this song. - "We're just a pair o', pair o', pair o' guys...me and Jonny Buckland...oh wait, you can't hear anything by Jonny in this song because the synths are so overbearing!" - Good to know Coldplay writes club anthems now. Yet another reason never to go to clubs (I'm serious, I HATE clubs). - Studio Charlie Brown! I liked the live versions I heard but it wasn't the second coming of Clocks like everyone insists. - I might legitimately like Charlie Brown if it weren't for that dumb "All the boys, all the girls" sequence. Oh well, least painful song so far. It's pure pop but done in a more positive manner. - Us Against the World...first one I have positive expectations for...let's see... - Chris's deep voice is a mixed bag, but I will say it works better here than on "Yes" on VLV (one of my least favorite Coldplay songs ever) - Oh good, they kept Will's part on studio. I'm liking this one so far. - Okay, UATW is the first good track on the album. I'm not a fan of a few of the vocal moments, but they're minor complaints compared to my other complaints on the album. - MMIX...okay? Huh? - IT WAS A WA-WA-WA-WA-WA-TURD-FALL - I turn the music up, I put my records on, I punch some babies listening to this horrid song - I don't know about you, but I'd rather be a full stop than a comma. I don't know what that means but it sounds way cooler. - Major Minus FUCK THIS SONG. This is not a good song, people. Stop convincing yourselves it is. - Without the vocal distortion, this one would be bearable but not great. With it, it's just another "experiment" gone awry. (and it's not much of an "experiement" either) - The "ooh, ooh" moments are officially Chris's most irritating vocals of all time. - UFO. First track I know nothing about yet. - Feels like an early B-side, which is actually a welcome thing by this point. Short and sweet. - It segues into Princess of China? Frick. - Bold statement time - PoC is the second worst song Coldplay has ever done (ETIAW being the first worst). - As I said last night, I'd hate this less if it were on a Rihanna album and were labeled "Rihanna (feat. Chris Martin)". - And as also said last night, Rihanna isn't even the #1 reason this song is horrible. She might not even be in the Top 5 reasons this song is horrible. - I have a shred of hope for Up in Flames. Please don't disappoint me. - Weird echo effect on Chris's voice, but it's not as bad of an effect as on HLH or MM. - That was...okay. Just because it's stripped down doesn't automatically make it good, so I think UATW achieved this a bit better. Not awful, though. - Not much to say about these intermission pieces like AHT. - 2 seconds into "Don't Let It Break Your Heart Because We Couldn't Possibly Come Up With a Worse Track Name Than This" and I can tell this is going to be divisive. - Certainly less of an atrocity than Paradise or ETIAW but isn't anywhere near as convincing of a catchy pop song as Charlie Brown. - Ending things with Up With the Birds - Not a bad closer. Not too bombastic. It may not be Amsterdam, but Coldplay is now 5-for-5 with album closers. Shame I'm so down about the rest of the album. I'll let this one settle in, along with a final score and more solid thoughts about songs in the latter half. But I'm comfortable saying this is my least favorite effort yet. Gonna go re-listen to the new My Brightest Diamond album now.

So yeah, I'm going to download this thing right now and I'm going to post my thoughts here in bullet-point format as I listen to the album in full, including the tracks I've already heard and hate, just to give that bullshit "works in the flow of the album" thing a fair shake. Figured I'd be safer posting it here than in the MX forum. Stay tuned.

In my non-opinion, you're dumb (it's non-opinion because it's fact :D) Seeing as how ETIAW is a 1/10, I couldn't vote quite that low, so I gave this a 2. :heart:

That backing track to Hurts Like Heaven sure as hell sounded like autotune. And just general vocal distortion is needless and destroys songs like Major Minus.

I can't wait until armpit noises in a microphone becomes a popular musical trend in 10 years and Coldplay decides to abandon all the fans it gained during its synth/autotune/R&B collab phase in favor of gaining a newer and larger fanbase who likes armpit noises in a microphone.

Nah, instead there's just a bunch of "lalalalalalalala" and "oohoohoohoohooh", which are just lazy filler lyrics that occupy most modern Coldplay songs.

And now for the part where I post ACTUAL Youtube comments and we mock them: everyones hating on this song because Rihanna is black! you people should be ashamed of yourselves! racism in 2011!! when Radiohead did a duet with PJ Harvey everyone was cheering and raving about it because she was white! but now that Chris Martin 1ups Radiohead with a superior song and a superior female singer everyone calls it crap just because she's black! Chris made a brilliant decision to ask Rihanna, remember YOU guys are nothing more than the fans, Chris knows exactly what he's doing. the song is beautiful. Coldplay is ten thousand times better than rihanna and probably the most important and biggest band of the last decade

Pros: - If I printed out the lyrics on some toilet paper and then sold that toilet paper to everyone, it would be a really nice thing for people to wipe their asses with. Cons: - Uninteresting synths, buried usage of actual instruments, lazy lyrics with a bunch of "ooooh oooooh oooooh laaaa laaaa laaaa" parts, and it feels more like Rihanna feat. Chris Martin rather than a Coldplay song. I honestly think I hate this song more than Paradise and it's nearly as bad as ETIAW.

Wow. Uh. Wow. That was shockingly putrid.

Just got off work and heard PoC for the first time. I was one of the people who refused to listen to the live version of PoC because no decent quality versions existed (everyone who thought those vids were listenable were lying to themselves). So it was my first time really hearing any of it and...I hate it. I'm not a fan of Rihanna, but it's not Rihanna who makes the song so awful. It's the terrible synth usage like on Paradise, plus a bunch of lazy "ooooh ooooooh ooooh" lyrics. Took the words right out of my mouth. If this was on a Rihanna album, I would hate it less. But it's not. This turned out to be the worst birthday ever after all. >.<

Yeah, but the good news is that the album will be out shortly, and should leak before the 31st. (hint hint...today's my birthday...leak today plz) I keep hyping up "Spectrum" even though I've only heard 30 seconds, and I think I'm just gonna declare it as Song of the Year right now. I hope I'm totally right.

YOU'RE OBVIOUS AND BORING

My birthday is tomorrow too. Get your own birthday. :P If you entered the online contest, apparently those winners will be notified Monday morning, so there's still hope for both of us. :)