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Your favourite Simpsons quotes


Sweet One

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my fav is one of the halloween specials 'time and punishment' where homer makes a time machine out of a toaster.

 

homer: "ahhh, what a beautiful morning, i have a feeling today is going to be a good day!"

bart: "DAD!! YOUR HAND IS CAUGHT IN THE TOASTER!!!"

homer: "AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH" flails around for a while and finally flings the toaster off his hand across the room, then sits on the floor next to the fridge and rests

lisa: "DAD ITS ON THERE AGAIN!"

homer: "AAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHH"

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more funny quotes that kill me....lol..

 

Homer: How could you? Haven't you learned anything from that guy that gives those sermons in church? Captain What's-his-name. We live in a society of laws, why do you think I took you to see all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughing! Did you? Except at that guy who made sound effects. Vroom! Beep! Honk! Honk! Ha-ha. Where was I? Oh yeah, stay out of my booze!

 

you know which one i can't remember well, it's from the halloween special, where marge is a witch, and at the end of the scene, homer is throwing eggs at the house in his genie costume, and says "come out we know your home, give us candy .. ( or somethin to that effect) .. and lisa goes "dad that's our house", town laughs... and homer screams, "get her! she's a witch!" .. lol... that was funny!!

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homer: bart! I can't find the remote I looked all over the house!

bart: did you check your pocket?!

(homer pulls the remote out of his pocket)

 

ralph: I found a moon rock in my nose....

 

ralph: my cats breath smells like cat food

 

(homer talking to his football team)

homer: okay now here comes the hard part... the cuts. I only cut....you....you...you and....you.

(Everyone else sighs in relief)

homer: Okay now everyone can hit the showers. Except for you steven....your cut.

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From the episode where Homer uses marijuana for medical purposes:

 

Marge: "Homer, I'm starting to get worried...."

Homer: "No need Marge, thanks to yes-I-cannabis I just got a promotion at work. WHOA! We have a kitchen!"

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One of my Favourites: (Homer and Bart is putting glaze on one of the sofa-pillows)

Marge; Why are you putting glaze on the sofa-pillow?

Homer; Hm... I Could ask you the same thing!

Marge; I think I'll leave you two alone...

:lol:

(..or something like that. I don't remember exactly..)

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Homer finds some extra cash (in his pocket if i remember right) then says: Marge, send the kids to the neighbors, i'm coming home loaded! :lol:

 

 

Homer heckling Ned from the bleachers: Flaaaaaaaderrrrs..Flaaaaaaanderrrs..

 

Millhouse naming himself Thrillhouse on some video game score list was pretty funny :)

 

"The Foreign Kid" btw, is Uter, the German Exchange Student!

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WORST EPISODE EVER! hahahahah

 

The Comic Book guy yea, hahahaha, I always laugh when they show the outside of his shop and the name of his store "The Android Dungeon!" hahaha

 

anyways. I heard this line yesterday, and I was cracking up.

Grandpa Simpson "But son, the Simpson name is my legacy to you, I got it from my father, and he got it from hit father, and his father got it when he traded a mule for it. And that mule went on to win back Spring Break!" ahahhahahahah

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More from Comic Book Guy!: "What's you're name?...Homer?...well excuse me "Homer," is you're name James Cameron or Ridley Scott?? No, it isn't.. so please kindly step away from my screenplay, thank you"

:lol:

 

"Since my breakfast burrito is rapidly congealing, i'll be blunt, i no longer have that item in question, bart simpson"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

VIVA Comic Book Guy!

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Bart: Homer do you wear boxers or briefs?

*Homer looks down*

Homer: Nope!

 

Witness protection guy: Ok Homer, when I nod my head and tap your leg and say Hell Mr Thompson, you say hello back. OK?

Homer: OK

WPG: *nods head, taps leg* Hello Mr thompson

*Homer sits still*

*long pause*

*Homer looks to the other guy and says*

Homer: I think he's talking to you.

 

:lol:

 

Scully: Homer this is a lie detector, it can detect when you lie. Do you understand?

Homer: yes

*lie detector goes boom*

 

 

Mo: Barney show them the exit

Barney: Theres a what now?

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