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Chris and Gwyneth announced their separation

Tash

By Tash
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Jenjie

Jenjie

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2592536/RACHEL-JOHNSON-Like-control-freaks-Gwynnie-just-pain-gluten-free-bun.html

 

So we've all stifled a nervous giggle over the ‘conscious uncoupling’ of the Gwyneth Paltrow-Chris Martin marriage.

 

We’ve attempted to read the long explanatory essay written by two members of the actress’s therapeutic entourage, Dr Habib Sadeghi and his wife Dr Sherry Sami, about how a break-up can be a breakthrough, and identified numerous negative internal objects that need healing.

 

Some of us may have even watched the calming video of a seraphic relationship guru called Katherine Woodward Thomas, who coined conscious uncoupling, in which she sets out how not to progress from ‘soul mate to soul hate’.

 

 

And after all of it, I’m afraid to say this verbal tofu is a top-dressing of New Age tosh, a PR exercise by Paltrow’s people par excellence.

 

When it comes to the separation of Paltrow and Chris, the medium, not the twaddle, is the message, and that is what should concern us here.

 

The message was posted only on Paltrow’s digital and e-commerce company, Goop, founded in 2008 ‘to share all of life’s positives’ and to be ‘your most trusted girlfriend on the web’.

 

 

We must not fall into the trap of eliding Goop with Gwyneth Paltrow (even though this week there’s a recipe for the ‘easiest gluten-free buns’, which I assumed at first was an allusion to the actress, who has admitted she has ‘the butt of a 22-year-old stripper’.)

 

Because if you translate it all from fluent Goop into American and then into actual English, this announcement just on its own is clear proof of a raging control freak, for whom all life is a project, and who has to micro-manage and Californicate every detail, or else.

 

The announcement was only 150 words or so. It was signed ‘Love Gwyneth and Chris.’ Her name first. Her stamp all over it.

 

Both statement and essay were designed to persuade us that Gwyneth has succeeded in curating the first gluten-free divorce-lite.

 

This is no split. No, no, no. It’s a transition to wholeness and personal growth and a new ‘expanded family’ uncontaminated by blood, carbs, guts, red meat and tears.

 

She leaves it to others to utter the words ‘pain’ and ‘divorce’, as if those words might toxify the purity of her brand.

 

She has followed the advice of fellow control freak Madonna to have and to own her ‘perfect divorce’ to the letter.

 

But the problem is you can’t control life, and it’s futile to try.

 

For me, the takeaway from this is clear: never mind that she thinks kale is a fun snack and breakfasts on quinoa granola (each to their own) – it’s the controlling perfectionism that’s impossible.

 

Her PAs tend to leave. Someone who has worked for her told me: ‘Those who don’t know her want to be close to her, and those who are close to her don’t want to know her.’

 

The editor of Vanity Fair, Graydon Carter, recently compared Paltrow to the North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un over his plans for a cover profile of her.

‘She asked that [friends and family] not speak to Vanity Fair about her, or about anything else ever again. Ever. Never,’ said Carter. ‘Kim Jong-un couldn’t have issued a more blanket demand.’

I saw Gwyneth at a Royal Academy breakfast on a schoolday back in 2012, ahead of the David Hockney show.

 

She was with her son Moses and he sat on her lap, her mass of blonde hair shielding him.

 

 

 

Mother and son saw the pictures, the video, sat through short talks about the painter, and then left just before banned substances such as croissants, tea and coffee were served.

 

Moses was just six. I know the architect who was hired to remodel the then-coupled couple’s house in Belsize Park, North London, between 2008 and 2010.

 

At the start, the architect asked Chris Martin over breakfast at the house/site if he wanted to see the plans.

 

‘I don’t want to see anything,’ the Coldplay singer replied. ‘I don’t want to know anything about it. This is all Gwyneth’s project.’ Then he pointed across the room. ‘I just don’t want anyone to move my piano.’

When costs rose, as they always do, Paltrow and the architect fell out – and he ended up being paid far less than he believed he was owed for two years’ work.

 

 

‘It was control freakery,’ he said. ‘Given that Gwyneth wouldn’t blink at spending a huge sum on a single light fitting.’

 

After completion, the architect – who has designed houses for high-profile clients such as film director Gaby Dellal and painter Jack Vettriano – says he was asked to remove any images of the house from his website and keep it secret that he had ever worked for her.

 

So yes, it’s hard working for a control freak. It’s hard being married to a control freak, and perhaps even Chris Martin, the yoga-bunny vegetarian who wrote Fix You for her, could only take so much perfection.

 

But it’s also hard being one. As Gwyneth Paltrow herself once admitted: ‘Nothing is as good as it looks.’

 

Apart from her gluten-free buns, perhaps.

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Jenjie

Jenjie

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http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/carol-mcgiffin-gwyneth-paltrow-chris-3300854

 

Divorce and separation are *horrible, no matter who you are.

 

But there's one reason it’s worse for those in the public eye.

 

It's that the whole world has to know – and the whole world has an opinion.

 

It's bad enough for Z-listers like me, so imagine what it must be like for Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin.

 

Speculation as to why they've split has gone into overdrive.

 

So far, according to people *definitely not in the know, it was Gwynnie's kiss with her ex Donovan Leitch at a very public baseball game.

 

Then there was Chris's partying with a gaggle of "brunette *beauties" at an after-Grammies event.

 

Was it was her passion for Kabbalah?

 

Or a dispute over what they feed their kids – you know, the old quinoa versus sweets argument?

 

It could be geographical.

 

Did he prefer London to LA, her preference?

 

Maybe it was her obsession with her spiritual guru Habib Sadeghi that was the final straw.

 

One of the more vicious ideas involves infidelity – it seems she's been *having an affair with every man she’s ever been *photographed with.

 

It's a good job she wasn't at the Oscars or she would have been accused with having a list of *lovers to rival Lindsay Lohan's.

 

The whole thing is crazy.

 

It's also been suggested that the Coldplay album is awash with cryptic lyrics about the marriage.

 

But anyone who's ever listened to Coldplay will know it's always been music to kill yourself to.

 

It's brilliant but it's a dirge.

 

When celebrities break up, everyone thinks they know the real reason why.

 

But no one, apart from them, does.

 

All we do know is Gwynnie and Chris have "consciously uncoupled".

 

I get that.

 

In fact, I like the phrase.

 

It denotes a grown-up attitude – no mud- slinging, no anger, no acrimony.

 

Never mind that no one else believes it or that the statement has unleashed a tirade of pent-up nastiness about her being smug, self-obsessed, loopy and delusional, claims the accusers justify by saying the couple are rich and famous.

 

Does it follow that because the pair's huge talents have made them SO rich and SO famous they deserve this?

 

No one has to buy Coldplay records or pay to watch Gwynnie's films.

 

No one has to look at her mysterious lifestyle tips or expensive "must-haves" on her website Goop.

 

So no, it doesn't follow.

 

What's more, I reckon they deserve some privacy at the moment.

 

When celebrities invade their own privacy, as most do, they can't demand privacy when they choose.

 

But this couple have always been fiercely private about their relationship, so they can.

 

Somehow, though, I doubt they'll get their wish.

 

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Batman

Batman

Posted
Posted
This is ridiculous guys. Why don't we just stop posting/discussing these silly articles and close the thread?!

 

Because apparently people like talking about silly things BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE A LIFE

 

 

I'm a fictional person don't judge me :batman:

 

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nvdmm

nvdmm

Posted
Posted
Because apparently people like talking about silly things BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE A LIFE

 

 

I'm a fictional person don't judge me :batman:

Well its spring and a lovely time to get out into the open and exercise. Being Batman I thought maybe you could fly into the city and teach people some martial arts. Or how to throw a batarang or fire a rocket launcher at the Daily Mail offices.

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Batman

Batman

Posted
Posted
Or how to throw a batarang or fire a rocket launcher at the Daily Mail offices.

 

Yeah I thought about making some of these article writers... disappear :charming: But you know my rules, no killing people, that's rude :wacky:

 

Some well placed Batarangs might solve the problem though, HAHAHAHA

 

*disappears into the shadows*

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LdySpace

LdySpace

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Posted

Very coincidentally, a couple of variations of articles came out, I think, yesterday about Estelle Wilkinson, their manager at the time, who was the one that actually introduced them.

 

But it was one gig in particular where fate would play its hand during the tour to promote their second album A Rush Of Blood To The Head. "Gwyneth came to see the band with a friend at Wembley Arena in 2002,” recalls Estelle, who is from Cardiff. “At the end of the gig I took her backstage to the dressing room and introduced her to the band. The rest, as they say, is history! The next week or so we played Dublin and Gwyneth went to that gig too. She was on the front cover of some magazine and one of the band said ‘she is in our dressing room!’ It was a little surreal for a while.”

 

She also says some nice things about the band.

 

“The dealing with the band was never any problem,” she adds. “I never had to bribe them to do an interview like I did with The Happy Mondays. Frankly no one could have had more of a driving force than Chris Martin and the rest of the band. It was phenomenal. So it was almost keeping up with them and trying to help them to fulfil their dreams. And their dreams were massive. And they’ve achieved them.”

 

And also:

 

"My first day at work was at Radio 1 where they were doing a session for Jo Whiley’s daytime show. And that’s the first time I met the band. My first impressions from the first day to the last were that they were just lovely, brilliant guys. And (guitarist) Johnny Buckland is from Mold, where I had spent loads of summer holidays so we bonded over Mold stories!"

 

http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/welsh-rock-band-manager-who-6892624

http://www.walesonline.co.uk/lifestyle/showbiz/former-coldplay-manager-estelle-wilkinson-2028813

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Linus

Linus

Posted
Posted
Latest "news":

 

Gwyneth, Chris divorce amicable because it has to be (link)

 

Gwyneth Paltrow 'will go on TOUR with Coldplay despite separating from Chris Martin' (link)

 

Wouldn't it be awkward if she would go on tour with them?

 

"A source close to Chris told The Sun: "Gwyneth has pledged to travel with the band.

 

"She's determined to keep things amicable and joked that she'll be their roadie."

 

F*** The Sun!! They're all a bunch of lying scums!!

boycott_the_sun.jpg

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kcp

kcp

Posted
Posted

I still think they are getting uncoupled to better their relationship sometimes it takes stepping back from something to bring out the good things from it .. I dunno why but I just expect to see them together more and rebuilding either just a great friendship or quite possibly a new relationship .. There's something mystery like and odd about it all from the announcement words to the picture I dunno I really think it's not the last of them. But who am I to talk lol Whatever happens I hope it betters everyone's life's involved !

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