Verdict: Why did he bother?

 

What do people want from a summer blockbuster? The folks behind Superman Returns have come up with a conventional answer: spectacular effects, a dash of romantic comedy and a superhero.

 

But they have overlooked the factors which will make Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 a far bigger success at the box office.

 

Superman Returns has only one terrific action sequence — when Superman saves an aeroplane from crashing — and this takes place early on.

 

From then on, we’re left waiting for a climax that never materialises. Even in the version I saw — which features five sequences in IMAX 3D — Superman Returns is less than thrilling.

 

There is some humour, especially in the exchanges between the villainous Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey, camping it up) and his dim sidekick Kitty (Parker Posey, clearly unsure whether her character is truly stupid or secretly savvy).

 

But you will search in vain for any wit in the newspaper office where Clark Kent, alias Superman (Brandon Routh), spars with his inamorata Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth) and editor Perry White (Frank Langella).

 

That part of the movie has definitely been dumbed down. We’re even asked to believe that Lois, supposedly a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist, would ask her editor: ‘How many Fs are there in catastrophe?’

 

Director Bryan Singer intends this to be a homage to her lack of spelling ability in the first, 1978 Superman picture (and elicit a knowledgeable ‘Ho, ho, ho!’ from the buffs), but in the present day it beggars belief that a prestigious journalist would flaunt her ignorance so shamelessly.

 

The romance between Clark and Lois is compromised by the plot, which has her seemingly unaware that she has borne Clark a son (er, why?) and happily engaged to her editor’s pleasant but plank-like nephew (James Marsden). The script is amazingly witless, with all parties tongue-tied, so it’s hard to see what Clark and Lois have in common, except their past. A bit of Beatrice and Benedick-style banter would not have come amiss.

 

The casting is another weakness. Routh is content to be a carbon copy of Christopher Reeve, while Bosworth and Marsden are so callow, bland and underpowered that they seem to have walked out of a day time soap.

 

The seemingly talentless child who plays Superman’s son stares at everyone like the creepy kid from The Omen, and the scriptwriters can’t think of anything much for Superboy to do, except teleport a piano.

 

Imagine the fun that Robert Rodriguez (of Spykids) would have had.

 

Singer is a respected director, thanks to his first hit The Usual Suspects and his successful launch of the X-Men franchise. But a sense of humour has never been his strong point and he takes the Superman legend way too reverentially, even drawing pretentious parallels between the man of steel and Jesus.

 

This Superman is steeped in nostalgia, which may be enough for that sad minority of middle-aged nerds who take comic books desperately seriously and wear superhero T-shirts over their paunches. Singer has forgotten that a generation of teenagers has grown up without much knowledge of Superman — the last movie was 19 years ago. To them, he is (if they know him at all) a figure in a TV series, and not a particularly distinguished one either.

 

Singer’s Superman is a solemn, nerdish figure with whom it’s hard to feel an affinity. He’s also a square-jawed American righting wrongs in a world where square-jawed Americans are now viewed with tremendous suspicion, especially when they claim omnipotence. Singer doesn’t seem to see this as a problem, but it is: a big one.

 

There are good things in this movie, but I found it pseudo-religious, pedestrian and oppressive.

 

Like Pirates 2, it is over-long at two-and-a-half hours. But unlike the Johnny Depp picture, it lacks the joy and sense of its own absurdity which make so long a stay in the cinema thoroughly entertaining.

 

The simplistic plot unfolds at too leisurely a pace, and takes us in directions that are easily predictable. The one attempt at ingenuity — Lex Luthor’s fiendish plan to dominate the world by building an attractive new island-continent and flooding the east side of the U.S. — goes off at half-cock.

 

All he does is create a small rocky island that doesn’t look habitable and appears to have no impact whatsoever on the U.S. coastline.

 

It’s a rotten plan, and Spacey looks far too intelligent to have searched for a weapon of mass destruction but only come up with a real estate project. And, at the end, Singer doesn’t even deliver a satisfactory come-uppance for him.

 

Despite some enjoyable sequences, on the whole Superman Returns is gloomy and cheerless: stodgily directed, mechanically scripted and boringly acted.

 

The impression you come away with is that being Superman isn’t much fun, and Lois Lane isn’t worth saving. So why should we want to spend this much time with them?

 

Chris Tookey

http://www.dailymail.co.uk

Totally disagree with that, I can name at least 4 more action sequences, so it`s full of shit for a start, and seems to not recognise the things that made the original Superman great are in this one too.

Well Chris Tookey is very hard to impress.

Superman has been sooooooooooooooooo quiet compared to Pirates.

 

Doesn't help that it's 3 hours long. Is just too much!

Superman has been sooooooooooooooooo quiet compared to Pirates.

 

Doesn't help that it's 3 hours long. Is just too much!

 

Haven`t seen Pirates, but I understand that whereas Pirates is rip roaring family fun, Superman Returns is more of an intelligent blockbuster, with plenty plenty of moments that provide emotion rather than ooohs and aaahs (although there are a few of them too) much like the story of Superman is supposed to be.

 

Oh, and Kevin Spacy is the best on screen villian bar none, nothing in any Pirates film can compare to Spaceys Luthor, fact!.

 

Can you tell I like this film? :D

Special effects don't come into it. It's the story that counts - and I bet it's lame.

I don't think I'll be bothering with this latest serving of "typical Hollywood".

I was underwhelmed at the end, totally. The OP is correctly summarizing the outcome.

 

 

 

 

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I would probably have to give it a 3 or 3 1/2. I was only impressed with that aeroplane/space shuttle effect. I think you are right to say that we are left waiting for something to happen. And it also left me with many many unanswered questions. Although the new Superman is not a bad actor, I think the story falls flat - there's just no oomph.

It's just boring, the plot is pretty damn awful. Tis a shame really.

i love the title of this thread lol

Well, it seemed like Synger had the same problem that Peter Jackson had with Hong Kong. It seemed like they grew up obsessing over King Kong or Superman, and now when they get the chance to do the remakes, they go really overboard trying to make the movie epic and everything. And yea, there are the Jesus comparisons too..... give me a break Synger!

 

Pirates 2 was really bloated though, so the movie felt much longer than it was.

I liked it too.

But Pirates 2 is better. As are V For Vendetta, Cars, The Da Vince Code, Inside Man, etc.

I loved it.

 

But I'm a self confessed fan of any superhero.

Good first post. I agree with everything. I didn't like the movie and after 1h30 I wanted to go away.

Bad plot. Bad casting. Bad chemistry. Bad diologues. Awful.

 

And if you never watched Superman before you would never know that Lois loved Clark or Superman. Those two are colder than Ice ... there's nothing there.

i loved the movie. I found it very interesting and i thought the acting was not just decent but good. Yeah,it doesn't deserve an Oscar but is still entertaining.

 

If only it hadn't been released at the same time with Pirates 2 Superman could have done so much better

I don't agree at all. I saw superman returns 3 times in the theaters. The first time, yea I was a little hestitant to like it, but after seeing in Imax (the only way IMO) I was blown away by the movie. I now love it. Oh and by the way, Pirates of the carribean 2 was not good at all. Talk about a pointless not needed movie (and I liked the first one a lot). Nothing happened in that movie. It was 2 1/2 hours that amounted to nothing. At least in Superman he found out he has a kid.

Pirates of the carribean 2 is S.H.I.T and so is the first one. Orlando Bloom should NOT make movies... only good thing about those 2 movies was Johnny Depp.. and as for Superman well i was quite disappointed after waiting to watch it for so long. but still much better than Pirates. ugh i hate that movie