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I'm glad I'm not a girl


Prince Myshkin

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Jesus my nipples hurt just thinking about it! :sick:

 

Just doing a bit of study of the relationship between gender and class, and came across this golden quote from 1879

"They [women] are closer to children and savages than to an adult civilised man”

wat

 

 

how

 

 

 

why :sad:

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That Axe advert reminds me of this other one commissioned by Rexona. They claimed that natural body odor is sooooo bad that women need to get rid of it by all means. They even supported their claim by drawing a pig on a woman's armpit. :wreck:

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Did you guys see the new Dove campaign.

 

I would advise for people to watch it first and then read this rather good blog post on it. Many of things which angered her about it kind of annoyed me too.

http://jazzylittledrops.tumblr.com/post/48118645174/why-doves-real-beauty-sketches-video-makes-me

 

 

I like that blog post and I agree with a lot of it. I found these aspects of the clip rather disturbing, too.

 

Another interesting thing we should always consider when we watch Dove clips:

It is part of the unilever group. Just like axe is.

 

Here's an axe clip :nice:

 

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I9tWZB7OUSU]The AXE Effect - Women - Billions - YouTube[/ame]

 

oh the irony

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In terms of the weight limitations to define a woman as "fat" or "skinny," it's really hard to find a middle ground. I know girls who are so thin and stay that way just to fit into other people's expectations of them. On the other hand, being bigger myself, I want to eat right and lose weight for myself, but also I don't. I want someone to like me for who I am, not what I look like. Hoping, futilely, it seems, that I, and others like me won't be ignored or bullied or treated differently simply because we aren't thin.

 

Judgment sucks. :(

 

Speech over :P

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Being fat doesnt make you ugly, it looks unhealthy. But everybody can live the way they want as long as they're happy.

 

Yeah yeah I know...

 

What I meant was that not being stick thin (at least where I live) is considered a bad thing, and no one takes you seriously.

 

So beyond losing weight just to get healthy, you have to do it for anyone to treat you like a person, not an alien.

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Yeah yeah I know...

 

What I meant was that not being stick thin (at least where I live) is considered a bad thing, and no one takes you seriously.

 

So beyond losing weight just to get healthy, you have to do it for anyone to treat you like a person, not an alien.

 

This.

 

I've made similar experience when I was younger. Well when I was between 12 and 17 some boys in my class and some other guys used to pick on me, because I wasn't as slim as the other girls in my class. It was horrible. I avoided going to parties. I avoided closer contact to guys, even if there were some who were interested in me, because I couldn't believe that they were (because I felt super big) and I didn't want people to see me with a guy and make them say "Omg look at him he's going out with that big girl!" (Oh myyy how stupid is this? But that's what I thought.) I felt like an alien just like you said. I can't believe how much this kind of experience influences you when you are getting older. I am slim now, but I am still kind of struggling with it every now and then. It is a shame how much those stupid guys can lower your self - confidence. And whenever I get to know a guy one of the thoughts I get sometimes is "doesn't he think I'm too big??" (isn't it a shame that you get these thoughts esp. as a girl?)

I know it is stupid and I shouldn't think things like that, but I feel that it is taking years to get rid of these thoughts. But I am improving. My self-confidence has become much higher within the last years.

 

I think it is since 2 or 3 years that I have understood that there are guys out there who find me attractive.

 

 

It is a hard life as a girl in today's society

 

btw...I'm 25 now

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I always noticed, at my high school at least, that the boys were way nastier towards the overweight girls than the other girls were..

 

And in elementary school, I was always picked on for being too skinny, anorexic, etc. Many times I wished I could actually gain weight! So no matter what body shape you are, people always pick your body apart..

 

But I'm happy I'm a female. We're strong.

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^Yes thats the point that I wanted to get across. My best friend was very tall and very thin and people made fun of her a lot and they thought it was a compliment by calling her anorexic because calling someone fat is the only harmful thing you can tell a girl. It hurt me a lot that they said such things. Like you can't be really skinny either! It's also unhealthy is someone was actually anorexic (but making fun of someone like that doesnt help either!!!!!!!!!!!) but I knew she just had smaller bones and that was just her natural frame. Also sucks that if a girl has a bigger frame they're like "lmao!!! is she a man????!!!" seriously I want to punch eveybody.

 

Also today some guy was asking/complaining to us why our friend Veronica has such short hair and that she looks like a lesbian and I seriously had to hold my fist down. Then guys with their head shaven are actually bald eagles.

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I've had that problem before like boys talking about the "perfect body" and they'd go on to use me as an example of somebody who they thought was too thin and my friend got accused of being anorexic, then other times they joke saying "you're so fat" but fuck it eats away at you and sometimes I'd actually start to question whether this is true and be weighing myself several times a day. I was never anorexic or dangerously thin, but it scares me to think how easy it is to spiral into becoming obsessed with your weight. It scares me the kinds of images on the internet people aspire to be like and it crushes me to see such beautiful looking girls thinking they are ugly when often I'd envy how pretty they were.

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My core groups of friends are great and whilst I'm not sure if they identify themselves as feminists explicitly, do hold all the right feminist values. I love it, as there's no bravado. There are a few groups of people I know through others, such as people I sometimes see in my town, people I used to go to uni with and old work mates who I really despise at times. One thing that really pisses me off is the rating of girls they persist with. It's only a certain type of guy that does it (at my age) but it tends to be a very vocal group who get noticed and they tend to stick together. The guys who rate girls out of 10.

 

They'll be saying they went out with a girl the other night and somebody will ask what they were like and they'll typically reply 'hmmm, 7 out of 10', then not really say much else on the matter. And it's not down to not wanting to talk too much about it, for if you probe them they are more than willing to answer all they can (though it quickly becomes apparent that even though they've spent the evening with the girl they know fuck all about them).

 

If you're describing a person to somebody who doesn't know that person, what they hell are they supposed to take away with '7 out of 10'. That statement says more about the rater than the rated. First of all that they are the kind of person who rates another person and keeps some form of mental league table, and secondly that whatever you can understand from the person rating the girl upon questioning, this girl would be a 7 out of 10 for him. How does this at all tell me anything about the girl except for how closely she fits to some thin spectrum of girl in the raters head that you are unaware of which is almost certainly based on physical attributes?

 

But they are happy, if not probed further (which in itself might not be a pleasant thing to do - if they are the type to rate in this way, when they start divulging more they tend to start meaningful descriptions from the wrong angle) to simply leave it as that. It's such a horrible way to look at a human being.

 

I imagine this kind of thing is done by some girls too but I just feel it's more prevalent in males, especially once you get past school where things like that can be perpetuated simply by the kind of environment you are in.

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My core groups of friends are great and whilst I'm not sure if they identify themselves as feminists explicitly, do hold all the right feminist values. I love it, as there's no bravado. There are a few groups of people I know through others, such as people I sometimes see in my town, people I used to go to uni with and old work mates who I really despise at times. One thing that really pisses me off is the rating of girls they persist with. It's only a certain type of guy that does it (at my age) but it tends to be a very vocal group who get noticed and they tend to stick together. The guys who rate girls out of 10.

 

They'll be saying they went out with a girl the other night and somebody will ask what they were like and they'll typically reply 'hmmm, 7 out of 10', then not really say much else on the matter. And it's not down to not wanting to talk too much about it, for if you probe them they are more than willing to answer all they can (though it quickly becomes apparent that even though they've spent the evening with the girl they know fuck all about them).

 

If you're describing a person to somebody who doesn't know that person, what they hell are they supposed to take away with '7 out of 10'. That statement says more about the rater than the rated. First of all that they are the kind of person who rates another person and keeps some form of mental league table, and secondly that whatever you can understand from the person rating the girl upon questioning, this girl would be a 7 out of 10 for him. How does this at all tell me anything about the girl except for how closely she fits to some thin spectrum of girl in the raters head that you are unaware of which is almost certainly based on physical attributes?

 

But they are happy, if not probed further (which in itself might not be a pleasant thing to do - if they are the type to rate in this way, when they start divulging more they tend to start meaningful descriptions from the wrong angle) to simply leave it as that. It's such a horrible way to look at a human being.

 

I imagine this kind of thing is done by some girls too but I just feel it's more prevalent in males, especially once you get past school where things like that can be perpetuated simply by the kind of environment you are in.

Recently I heard a girl saying "why does he bother, I am way out of his league" it does irritate me and also reminds me how glad I am that I don't stick around with them anymore. It irritates me more that they contradict that they've said looks aren't important before.

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This.

 

I've made similar experience when I was younger. Well when I was between 12 and 17 some boys in my class and some other guys used to pick on me, because I wasn't as slim as the other girls in my class. It was horrible. I avoided going to parties. I avoided closer contact to guys, even if there were some who were interested in me, because I couldn't believe that they were (because I felt super big) and I didn't want people to see me with a guy and make them say "Omg look at him he's going out with that big girl!" (Oh myyy how stupid is this? But that's what I thought.) I felt like an alien just like you said. I can't believe how much this kind of experience influences you when you are getting older. I am slim now, but I am still kind of struggling with it every now and then. It is a shame how much those stupid guys can lower your self - confidence. And whenever I get to know a guy one of the thoughts I get sometimes is "doesn't he think I'm too big??" (isn't it a shame that you get these thoughts esp. as a girl?)

I know it is stupid and I shouldn't think things like that, but I feel that it is taking years to get rid of these thoughts. But I am improving. My self-confidence has become much higher within the last years.

 

I think it is since 2 or 3 years that I have understood that there are guys out there who find me attractive.

 

 

It is a hard life as a girl in today's society

 

btw...I'm 25 now

 

:hug:

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^Yes thats the point that I wanted to get across. My best friend was very tall and very thin and people made fun of her a lot and they thought it was a compliment by calling her anorexic because calling someone fat is the only harmful thing you can tell a girl. It hurt me a lot that they said such things. Like you can't be really skinny either! It's also unhealthy is someone was actually anorexic (but making fun of someone like that doesnt help either!!!!!!!!!!!) but I knew she just had smaller bones and that was just her natural frame. Also sucks that if a girl has a bigger frame they're like "lmao!!! is she a man????!!!" seriously I want to punch eveybody.

 

Also today some guy was asking/complaining to us why our friend Veronica has such short hair and that she looks like a lesbian and I seriously had to hold my fist down. Then guys with their head shaven are actually bald eagles.

 

Some people. :no: :angry:

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It will change.

 

Ideas develop. Awareness grows. It'll never be a utopia but more and more women will begin to believe in themselves, even if it's through friends initially. More and more guys will get involved as they are confronted with these things more thanks to journalism and the internet. It's still early days in the great scheme of things.

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I stopped wearing makeup as well, I started around year 9 to try and fit in and eventually gave up because I hated it, I'd constantly be worrying if it had smudged and I still considered myself ugly with it anyway so I thought why bother plus acne.

 

My boss at work one time kept asking me why I don't wear makeup and saying all this stuff about giving me a makeover and acting like she is this perfect life coach and how else will I get a boyfriend, honestly it made me feel so small and I just wanted to cry.

I choose not to wear makeup because I feel less self conscious without it, I know I'm no Scarlett Johanssen with flawless skin but I wouldn't want to be around people who choose to judge me on my looks anyway.

 

This is exactly how I feel. I don't care if women want to wear makeup or dress a certain way, but only if it's to make themselves happy. You have no idea how mad I get when girls dress a certain way to make society accept them. It sickens me that it's so wrong to be yourself.

 

I wear jeans and t-shirts because I'm comfortable, I don't bother with makeup because I don't want to, I'm not thin, and you know what? I'm happy with myself. I refuse to be someone that I'm actually not. Someone thinks that I'm ugly? Fine, I don't want to be associated with you anyway. Stay away from me. I trust my friends and family to like me for who I am, not my appearance.

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I'm trying so hard to show these ideas to my friends, not shove it down their throats but to see if they can understand what I come from. Sometimes they do but other times they make fun of girls who in their minds look manly. I had to explain to a close friend that it was a ignorant thing to think. At least evolution is happening little by little and hopefully by the time i'm older the world will seem less scared of change.

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There are coming up to 4 billion females in the world. Humans have had full behavioural modernity for 50,000 years. You'd think societies would be able to handle differences that pose no threat to others a hell of a lot better by now. And you'd think we'd be in a very different place in terms of equality, even (as a basic and underwhelming minimum) simply in terms of those who do fall within that magic spectrum of supposed acceptance. We aren't. The human race is so strange.

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