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Glastonbury like touching Robert Pattisons Balls


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Coldplay have compared being asked to play Glastonbury to Twilight actor Robert Pattinson inviting you to touch his balls.


The band, who last topped the bill at the festival in 2005, are one of a number of acts rumoured to be headlining the event in Somerset next June.


But in an interview with Q magazine, singer Chris Martin played down the reports and said it “depends if we get asked”.


He added: “That’s like getting asked to dance by Robert Pattinson if you’re a young girl. Imagine if Robert Pattinson called and asked, 'Do you want to touch my balls?'.”

Meanwhile, Coldplay are set to release a festive single called 'Christmas Lights' next week.

The band, who are recording their new album, are also set to play two special festive shows in the UK next month for the homeless charity Crisis.

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I'm Robert Pattinson's doctor so I have touched Robert Pattinson's balls. I thought they were peanuts at first because they were so small and salty. So next time you get on an airplane and the flight attendant gives you a free bag of salted peanuts, you can think to yourself, "Wow, it's like I'm eating Coldplay! And Robert Pattinson's balls!"




I've made my awkward comment for the day.



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I have a theory that Chris is competing with Tom Baker for the most zany and off-the wall comments...


Tom often tells us how he used to go "cruising in Sloane Square. I got mistaken for Claire Raynor [the agony aunt] and then had to spend the next hour giving out detailed advice to random strangers on thrush and cystitis because I didn't have the heart to tell them I wasn't Claire." :)

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Ugh. I just read some of the comments off a Robert Pattinson fanblog about Chris's comment. They need to take things less seriously and/or get hit by a humour stick.





That is funny...they have their panties in a bunch???


God I love Chris and his media inappropriateness.....he makes me laugh. I can so imagine him saying this while fidgeting with his cap.:kiss:

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That is funny...they have their panties in a bunch???


Yep. I just lurk though, so no rebuttals sadly. I believe the words 'crass' and 'rude' are being thrown around. Oh, and the dumbest comment went along the lines of 'another celeb throwing Robert's name around for publicity'

I had to stop reading after that frankly ridiculous statement.

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