strawberryfields Posted March 26, 2009 Author Share Posted March 26, 2009 I'll never forget about you. I love you even more right now than I ever did before, if that's even possible. I'm scared that you'll start moving on, though; that's what's scaring me the most right now. I trust you more than I've ever trusted anyone else in my life, so if you say you'll never forget, I'll try to believe you. But I'm still scared. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawberryfields Posted March 27, 2009 Author Share Posted March 27, 2009 dp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawberryfields Posted March 29, 2009 Author Share Posted March 29, 2009 You thought I would just forget about things after a month. Well, big surprise. It's been over three months and the feelings are still here. I've been on the point of breaking a lot recently. And every time I almost broke, you'd just pile more and more shit on me to try and keep those feelings inside. Well today, I finally broke. I broke, and I cried, and everything you've done and said in the past year- no, two years- just fell on top of me. And when you saw me break, you turned away in disgust. You didn't know what to do so you pretended nothing was happening. Do you know how that makes me feel? I don't think any mom is supposed to act like that towards their child. And speaking of your behavior as a mom, ever since you got a boyfriend, he's turned you away against your own children. That's why you never react when you see that one of them is in pain- because you've listened to him, and he's brainwashed you. (Haha, I'm posting too much in my own thread :P) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackchickintheback Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 I actually said what i wished to say to my friend just now via text and she hasn't responded. She's such a little brat and always taking her issues out on me when I try my hardest to be fucking supportive. And yeah... here's what I said. "Yes you do! I'm your fucking punching bag, shrink, and wet nurse half the time!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayzo Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 I think I upset you accidentally, I wish I could say sorry, I hope you know me deep down!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Violet Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 Look, I don't really know what your problem is. You won't tell me, but that's OK, seeing as that's not the real issue. The problem I have with you is that I don't understand why you being stressed or frustrated or whatever at whatever is going on gives you the right to treat everyone like crap, especially friends like me who are only trying to BE a friend and help you out. I say "Hi," and you don't even LOOK at me. Do you know what kind of message that sends? DO YOU? I know you're a moody person; I am, too. That doesn't mean you go overboard and act like no one is there. (And that, unfortunately, is EXACTLY what you're doing.) You don't talk to anyone really, and when you DO talk to people, you snap at them. And this is all for WHAT? Oh yeah, that's right. Nobody knows because you won't talk to anyone because you hate the world right now. Look, I just want you to be OK. Despite my frustration with you, I still care about you a lot. I just don't like to see you like this; no one does. I wish there was something I could do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawberryfields Posted April 3, 2009 Author Share Posted April 3, 2009 I was thinking earlier about McDonalds restaurants, malls, city buses, and the little ticket machines at subway stations... and every other inane thing we ever talked about. And all that just made me want to be with you even more. :embarassed: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tnspieler1012 Posted April 3, 2009 Share Posted April 3, 2009 "Christopher curled all around the world." I can't f'n pronounce those damn rl words!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawberryfields Posted April 4, 2009 Author Share Posted April 4, 2009 I went to a PostSecret exhibit today and it really made me see things differently. I thought I was the only one who was capable of hurting over something like what happened, but I found out today that I'm not the only one, that we're not the only ones with a weird relationship like this. It made me happy, because it gave me hope. But now... now I don't know if I have that hope, because you have me worried, so worried. All I want is to figure out what's wrong and then make every little thing better, until you're the happiest person in the world. That would make me complete. :bomb: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayzo Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 Listen....you.....:lol:, can you please try and be more careful with things, you know what I mean. Grr. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayzo Posted April 6, 2009 Share Posted April 6, 2009 :lol: Nobody posted in here since me last time damnit!! :P I'll always feel it, I will, and I know you're doing your best, but for a short short while I need to step back, I just need to sort my head and life out coz its filled with other crap at the moment. You haven't done anything wrong, at all :). "Just be patient, and don't worry" :nice:. And.... to someone I thought was my friend, I hate for how you're treating me at the moment, I really do. The way you acted yesterday was almost unforgiveable. You're not a nice guy :angry:. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawberryfields Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 You are the fucking worst friend ever. I don't know why, after all of these years (and how many has it been? 7?) I've put up with you. You treat me like shit, although when you want something, you try to act all sweet and loving. You completely love me, but you don't show it in the way you treat me. You love me because I'll do anything you ask. It's my fault for putting up with you in the first place, I know. You take me for granted- I'm such a great friend to you, I do so many things for you, and because of that, you use me. You know I'll do anything you ask by now, so you just use that to your advantage. I'm sick and tired of it. And, you're a terrible person. I still can't figure out why I call you my best friend. You talk about people behind their backs, you make racist and sexist jokes, you laugh at people who say they're in love. You only care about what people look like on the outside. I hate you for that. The other day, when you saw your parents kiss each other after dinner, you told them to stop, that they were being disgusting. And they listened, because EVERYONE listens to you. Do you know how lovely it is to see parents who are still in love with each other? No, you don't, because you've never had to experience loss or pain like that. Yet, at the same time, you make me laugh, and we share so many of the same interests and hobbies. But is that enough? I don't think so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayzo Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 Gah :cry:. I'm sorry, I can't sabotage mine and your life anymore, I will never forgive myself, and if I don't do this now I never will: Live your life. When the time is right I'll probably look again, I will, but until then, don't feel pressured. I can't do whats happening to someone I care so much about, sorry, I can't. I shall set you free. If you are bound by stuff then thats up to you, but I won't support it, my concious won't let me..... I'll see you soon, hopefully. My mind is all over the place, and I don't know what I want from life - but that doesn't mean I don't feel the same ;). I'm sorry... but I have to do this. You'll never know how hard it is for me to say that. You really really don't :sad:!! "Sometimes the hardest thing, and the right thing, are the same" "The hardest part, was letting go, not taking part" :nice: Fate will dictate the future ;). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saffire Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 I wish I could figure you out. Then maybe I could get over you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chuck kottke Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 I sincerely hope we don't enter a scientific dark-ages; we have been given the brains we've been given to advance our collective and individual wisdom - let's not turn back the clock on this; we've got to find a better way forward. How does one reconcile what is written in a "holy book" with the reality of scientific enquiry? The problem I find with dogmatic rigid religious interpretation is that in looking at the texts for a description of how the world works, it's usually wrong, but in social settings there are many good moral tales - I just wish they would elaborate more on the "why" as to when problems arise when certain accepted rules are not held to, and to not be so absolute in the punishment end, since life is about learning and growing, for surely we all make mistakes that hurt ourselves and others from time to time. We're supposed to advance, and going backwards is not the answer. I often get the impression some in the relgious field are more into snake oil sales, or providing pleasant soothing simple answers to a complex world. As well, they seem to sell their wares by absolutes, and seek all kinds of obtuse illogical arguments to make the impossible possible. We all like a good tale, and the taller the better, but for all practical purposes mixing fantasy with reality often leads to catastrophy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lore Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gotcheese2768 Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 i wish i could kiss you. but your a boy and i'm a boy..and that just wouldn't work out cuz no one would accept us. i can't believe i actually just posted this on here..but i feel so stressed tonight and what i just said adds to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxKels Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 i learned a new word today(48hours after tummy surgery) :sick: BILE. THE most disgusting thing the human body ever produced.:sick2: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saffire Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 i wish i could kiss you. but your a boy and i'm a boy..and that just wouldn't work out cuz no one would accept us. i can't believe i actually just posted this on here..but i feel so stressed tonight and what i just said adds to it. I know exactly how you feel, man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In a telescope lens Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 what did i ever do to you? why do you act that way? do you really hate me? what happened between us? we used to be so close. now you're only happy with me when you're making me miserable. why? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gotcheese2768 Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 I know exactly how you feel, man. thanks, just when i think i get to a good point i realize there are still a lot of people out there that just will never accept me. but again thanks it's nice to know i am not alone :hug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In a telescope lens Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 I accept you!! :hug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jsalyers Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 thanks, just when i think i get to a good point i realize there are still a lot of people out there that just will never accept me. but again thanks it's nice to know i am not alone :hug: Fuck those people Erick!!! Who cares about them! ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jsalyers Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 thanks, just when i think i get to a good point i realize there are still a lot of people out there that just will never accept me. but again thanks it's nice to know i am not alone :hug: Fuck those people Erick!!! Who cares about them! ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gotcheese2768 Posted April 9, 2009 Share Posted April 9, 2009 thanks joe :hug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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