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Chris Martin's siblings


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Lol, it's all good @Dan 6N.

 

I understand people will either hate me or love me for doing it.

 

These articles really sparked my interest a lot though, for anyone further interested:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/columnists/article-229150/Rosanna-caught-Cold.html

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/celebritynews/7956529/Sister-of-Coldplay-star-Chris-Martin-takes-hard-career-path.html

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  • 4 weeks later...

Me: Hey, Chris....Chrisssy.... Chrisssssssssssssss

Chris: What!!?

Me: so.... like.... y'know it's my birthday next week right?

Chris: yeah.

Me: oh, so you know. oh, good....

*A moments awkward silence*

Chris: is there anything in particular that you're after?

Me: Oh.... just a few small things.

Chris: like what?

Me: A helicopter.

Chris: uh-huh.... anything else?

Me: oh there's a new Ricky Gervais dvd out.....

*another awkward silence*

Chris: anything else, broseph?

Me: oh, well... there is just a small... oh nevermind.

Chris: no, go on...

Me: nah you won't like it.

Chris: JUST TELL ME JAMIE! (+1 for using my own name as his brother??? :awesome:)

Me: Wellllllll........ could I get a signed copy of 'Sliding Doors off Gwynnie?'

Chris: OMFG, I can't believe you mentioned my wife! I'm so angry right now!!! I could pull my hair out!! but I won't because then I'll be even more paranoid about it never growing back! but ZOMFG, how DARE you mention my exceptionally famous and highly successful wife who is in the newspapers every single day! I'm so mad I'm going to storm out of this interview right now! only to return in five minutes when I've sat on a roof and calmed down.

Me: interview?

Chris: STFU!!

Me: woah.... woah.... woah.... I probably shouldn't tell you what me and gwynie did together last month....

Chris: ..... WTF? what happened? you bone my wife!?

Me: no no no no no..... we just.... we... well, we got to talking, one thing led to another and we....

Chris: WHAT!? you WHAT?

Me: *breaking into tears* WE SAID THAT WE BOTH HATED 'HIGH SPEED' :bigcry: I'm SOOO Sorrryyyyyyy.

Chris: Fuck you! I wrote that song about a washing machine! it has soul!

Me: does.... does this mean I won't be getting a helicopter?

Chris: ......

Me: what about the new ricky gervais dvd?

Chris: I think you should leave...

 

 

in hindsight, I got a bit too carried away there.....

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Me: Hey, Chris....Chrisssy.... Chrisssssssssssssss

Chris: What!!?

Me: so.... like.... y'know it's my birthday next week right?

Chris: yeah.

Me: oh, so you know. oh, good....

*A moments awkward silence*

Chris: is there anything in particular that you're after?

Me: Oh.... just a few small things.

Chris: like what?

Me: A helicopter.

Chris: uh-huh.... anything else?

Me: oh there's a new Ricky Gervais dvd out.....

*another awkward silence*

Chris: anything else, broseph?

Me: oh, well... there is just a small... oh nevermind.

Chris: no, go on...

Me: nah you won't like it.

Chris: JUST TELL ME JAMIE! (+1 for using my own name as his brother??? :awesome:)

Me: Wellllllll........ could I get a signed copy of 'Sliding Doors off Gwynnie?'

Chris: OMFG, I can't believe you mentioned my wife! I'm so angry right now!!! I could pull my hair out!! but I won't because then I'll be even more paranoid about it never growing back! but ZOMFG, how DARE you mention my exceptionally famous and highly successful wife who is in the newspapers every single day! I'm so mad I'm going to storm out of this interview right now! only to return in five minutes when I've sat on a roof and calmed down.

Me: interview?

Chris: STFU!!

Me: woah.... woah.... woah.... I probably shouldn't tell you what me and gwynie did together last month....

Chris: ..... WTF? what happened? you bone my wife!?

Me: no no no no no..... we just.... we... well, we got to talking, one thing led to another and we....

Chris: WHAT!? you WHAT?

Me: *breaking into tears* WE SAID THAT WE BOTH HATED 'HIGH SPEED' :bigcry: I'm SOOO Sorrryyyyyyy.

Chris: Fuck you! I wrote that song about a washing machine! it has soul!

Me: does.... does this mean I won't be getting a helicopter?

Chris: ......

Me: what about the new ricky gervais dvd?

Chris: I think you should leave...

 

 

in hindsight, I got a bit too carried away there.....

 

the best thing in this thread

:laugh3::laugh3::laugh3:

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Me: Hey, Chris....Chrisssy.... Chrisssssssssssssss

Chris: What!!?

Me: so.... like.... y'know it's my birthday next week right?

Chris: yeah.

Me: oh, so you know. oh, good....

*A moments awkward silence*

Chris: is there anything in particular that you're after?

Me: Oh.... just a few small things.

Chris: like what?

Me: A helicopter.

Chris: uh-huh.... anything else?

Me: oh there's a new Ricky Gervais dvd out.....

*another awkward silence*

Chris: anything else, broseph?

Me: oh, well... there is just a small... oh nevermind.

Chris: no, go on...

Me: nah you won't like it.

Chris: JUST TELL ME JAMIE! (+1 for using my own name as his brother??? :awesome:)

Me: Wellllllll........ could I get a signed copy of 'Sliding Doors off Gwynnie?'

Chris: OMFG, I can't believe you mentioned my wife! I'm so angry right now!!! I could pull my hair out!! but I won't because then I'll be even more paranoid about it never growing back! but ZOMFG, how DARE you mention my exceptionally famous and highly successful wife who is in the newspapers every single day! I'm so mad I'm going to storm out of this interview right now! only to return in five minutes when I've sat on a roof and calmed down.

Me: interview?

Chris: STFU!!

Me: woah.... woah.... woah.... I probably shouldn't tell you what me and gwynie did together last month....

Chris: ..... WTF? what happened? you bone my wife!?

Me: no no no no no..... we just.... we... well, we got to talking, one thing led to another and we....

Chris: WHAT!? you WHAT?

Me: *breaking into tears* WE SAID THAT WE BOTH HATED 'HIGH SPEED' :bigcry: I'm SOOO Sorrryyyyyyy.

Chris: Fuck you! I wrote that song about a washing machine! it has soul!

Me: does.... does this mean I won't be getting a helicopter?

Chris: ......

Me: what about the new ricky gervais dvd?

Chris: I think you should leave...

 

 

in hindsight, I got a bit too carried away there.....

 

 

:lol:

 

me: Hey, Chris, my favorite brother in the whole world....

Chris: OH WHAT THE FUDGE DO YOU WANT?

me: Well, I was just thinking, since you clearly hate Jamie now, can you give me a helicopter instead?

Chris:...

me: And can you mention me the next time you see Mat Whitecross? You know, you can tell him that I am a filmmaker, too, and I am like a gorgeous girl version of you :gorgeous:

Chris: I don't know...

me: You can tell him I also have a helicopter!

Chris: But you don't.

me: But I will. :wideeyed: *waves hand* You will get me a helicopter, Chris.

Chris: I will get you a helicopter, lovely Brooke. :blank:

me: And you will hook me up with Mat Whitecross.

Chris: And I will hook you up with Mat Whitecross. :blank:

 

and that's how you do you it :charming:

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:lol:

 

me: Hey, Chris, my favorite brother in the whole world....

Chris: OH WHAT THE FUDGE DO YOU WANT?

me: Well, I was just thinking, since you clearly hate Jamie now, can you give me a helicopter instead?

Chris:...

me: And can you mention me the next time you see Mat Whitecross? You know, you can tell him that I am a filmmaker, too, and I am like a gorgeous girl version of you :gorgeous:

Chris: I don't know...

me: You can tell him I also have a helicopter!

Chris: But you don't.

me: But I will. :wideeyed: *waves hand* You will get me a helicopter, Chris.

Chris: I will get you a helicopter, lovely Brooke. :blank:

me: And you will hook me up with Mat Whitecross.

Chris: And I will hook you up with Mat Whitecross. :blank:

 

and that's how you do you it :charming:

 

:lol: :awesome:

I had no idea you did film.

I did film at uni.

maybe me and you hook up? :charming: :wink:

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Highly hilarious!

 

 

Me: Hey, Chris....Chrisssy.... Chrisssssssssssssss

Chris: What!!?

Me: so.... like.... y'know it's my birthday next week right?

Chris: yeah.

Me: oh, so you know. oh, good....

*A moments awkward silence*

Chris: is there anything in particular that you're after?

Me: Oh.... just a few small things.

Chris: like what?

Me: A helicopter.

Chris: uh-huh.... anything else?

Me: oh there's a new Ricky Gervais dvd out.....

*another awkward silence*

Chris: anything else, broseph?

Me: oh, well... there is just a small... oh nevermind.

Chris: no, go on...

Me: nah you won't like it.

Chris: JUST TELL ME JAMIE! (+1 for using my own name as his brother??? :awesome:)

Me: Wellllllll........ could I get a signed copy of 'Sliding Doors off Gwynnie?'

Chris: OMFG, I can't believe you mentioned my wife! I'm so angry right now!!! I could pull my hair out!! but I won't because then I'll be even more paranoid about it never growing back! but ZOMFG, how DARE you mention my exceptionally famous and highly successful wife who is in the newspapers every single day! I'm so mad I'm going to storm out of this interview right now! only to return in five minutes when I've sat on a roof and calmed down.

Me: interview?

Chris: STFU!!

Me: woah.... woah.... woah.... I probably shouldn't tell you what me and gwynie did together last month....

Chris: ..... WTF? what happened? you bone my wife!?

Me: no no no no no..... we just.... we... well, we got to talking, one thing led to another and we....

Chris: WHAT!? you WHAT?

Me: *breaking into tears* WE SAID THAT WE BOTH HATED 'HIGH SPEED' :bigcry: I'm SOOO Sorrryyyyyyy.

Chris: Fuck you! I wrote that song about a washing machine! it has soul!

Me: does.... does this mean I won't be getting a helicopter?

Chris: ......

Me: what about the new ricky gervais dvd?

Chris: I think you should leave...

 

 

in hindsight, I got a bit too carried away there.....

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:laugh3::laugh3:I have'nt laughed so hard for ages:laugh3: thats clever lol

Me: Hey, Chris....Chrisssy.... Chrisssssssssssssss

Chris: What!!?

Me: so.... like.... y'know it's my birthday next week right?

Chris: yeah.

Me: oh, so you know. oh, good....

*A moments awkward silence*

Chris: is there anything in particular that you're after?

Me: Oh.... just a few small things.

Chris: like what?

Me: A helicopter.

Chris: uh-huh.... anything else?

Me: oh there's a new Ricky Gervais dvd out.....

*another awkward silence*

Chris: anything else, broseph?

Me: oh, well... there is just a small... oh nevermind.

Chris: no, go on...

Me: nah you won't like it.

Chris: JUST TELL ME JAMIE! (+1 for using my own name as his brother??? :awesome:)

Me: Wellllllll........ could I get a signed copy of 'Sliding Doors off Gwynnie?'

Chris: OMFG, I can't believe you mentioned my wife! I'm so angry right now!!! I could pull my hair out!! but I won't because then I'll be even more paranoid about it never growing back! but ZOMFG, how DARE you mention my exceptionally famous and highly successful wife who is in the newspapers every single day! I'm so mad I'm going to storm out of this interview right now! only to return in five minutes when I've sat on a roof and calmed down.

Me: interview?

Chris: STFU!!

Me: woah.... woah.... woah.... I probably shouldn't tell you what me and gwynie did together last month....

Chris: ..... WTF? what happened? you bone my wife!?

Me: no no no no no..... we just.... we... well, we got to talking, one thing led to another and we....

Chris: WHAT!? you WHAT?

Me: *breaking into tears* WE SAID THAT WE BOTH HATED 'HIGH SPEED' :bigcry: I'm SOOO Sorrryyyyyyy.

Chris: Fuck you! I wrote that song about a washing machine! it has soul!

Me: does.... does this mean I won't be getting a helicopter?

Chris: ......

Me: what about the new ricky gervais dvd?

Chris: I think you should leave...

 

 

in hindsight, I got a bit too carried away there.....

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